For starters, I do not own Castle or any of the characters from Castle. I'm just writing for fun, clean and simple. I also could never be genius enough to write such a song as "White Blank Page" which is the property of the fabulous Mumford and Sons.

Hey... Anyone still interest in this story? Ever though the writer is THE WORST updater ever... Sorry. I've been out of town and then there was no inspiration and... It's no excuse. Please don't hate me haha. Anyway. Here's chapter 14, I hope you enjoy! It's not the longest or most content heavy chapter but parts of it are cute. So. Comments, constructive criticism, thoughts, whatever are always appreciated and gladly accepted (All ye who favorited and followed and reviewed, you are dolls and too kind to a crazy girl like me. Seriously, thank you:) ) Hope you enjoy!

Thanks,

M:)

XXX

White Blank Page

Chapter 14

Jim left after breakfast, stating that he had to get home to water his plants, check his mail and other tasks that Kate felt could keep until the case was over, but her father refused another night's stay, thanked the Castles for their kindness, promised to call her soon, and was out the door within the hour. The click of the lock had barely finished echoing in the loft before Kate had her phone to her ear, contacting Espo and Ryan.

"Hey, I need you guys to put a detail on my dad."

"Wait, what? Isn't he there with you?" Ryan punched the speaker button so Esposito could hear.

"Yeah, he was but he just left. Please guys," She was desperate and the boys could hear it in her voice. Rick, who had sidle up behind her in the bedroom, slid his fingers over her back before wrapping his arm around her and pulling her against his chest.

"Yeah, yeah, okay, I'll get on that." Ryan went to end the call but Esposito grabbed the phone away before he could and held it to his ear.

"Hey yo, Beckett you still there?"

"Mhm, yeah, what's up?"

"So we found out that Johnson's next of kin is his twin brother, David Johnson who's a cop down at the 47th. He's coming down now."

"Thanks Espo, keep me apprised."

"You got it."

The phone clicked off and Kate sighed, tugging a hand haphazardly through her hair and pacing several steps away from Castle into the office.

"Kate, he'll be okay."

She sucked her lip between her teeth to bite off the bitter retort about them thinking they'd be okay that rose like bile in her throat and simply nodded.

"What I don't get is why Smith hasn't called me yet! If this has something to do with your mother's case, he should have called…"

"Can't you just call him?" Talking about Smith still made her uneasy. Whatever he'd told Castle about being a friend of Montgomery's, she still felt weird about trusting someone she'd never talked to let alone met.

"He always contacts me. You know, he's voice on the phone, a shadow in a parking garage."

Kate whirled from her position at the window, "What?"

"What, what?"

"Castle you met with him?"

"Yeah, I told-"

"No, you didn't. Castle, how could you be so stupid!"

"I was doing it to-"

"What do you even know about this guy, huh? He was Roy's friend. But then what did we really even know about Roy. How do you know that he's not a part of this and talking to you isn't a part of the-"

"Kate." Castle crossed the room in three strides and had her by the tops of the arm, "He's keeping you safe. Frankly, that's all I care about."

"And keeping you safe is all I care about. We're square. You can't go off meeting him in parking garages alone anymore. Not without back up." Her fingernails dug into his sides as she clenched her hand around his t-shirt.

"Kate-"

"Until we solve this, just… please." Tears clouded her vision and she cursed herself for being so damn emotional.

"Okay, okay, shhh. I won't. Okay." He leaned down and pressed his lips to her temple, tottering them back until he was able to sink onto the couch.

"Kate, how bad's the pain?"

"Castle that has nothing to do-" She was cut off by herself, gasping as she twisted in his arms and her stitches pulled across her abdomen.

"Kate." His hands fluttered over her, unsure of where to touch or how to comfort.

"Just give me a second." She hissed between her teeth, clenching the hem of her shirt in her fist.

"Okay." He brushed some hair from her face and watched as he breathing steadied and she relaxed back into the couch.

"Seriously, Kate, you need to take that pain stuff."

"No, we talked about this, Rick. I can't-"

"Please. It's killing me watching you like this." His hand cradled the side of her face and he forced her eyes to his, "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

She chewed the inside of her cheek for a moment and then nodded once, "Okay."

"Thank you." He tilted his head and pressed his mouth to hers.

"As long as you take yours," She broke away, staring into his eyes.

"Done," he agreed without a thought. Castle kissed her again and then darted off to grab the bottles from the kitchen. Martha and Alexis were sprawled on the couch, watching TV. Castle paused, counted days on his fingers.

"Shouldn't you be at school, pumpkin?"

"I called in and… You don't mind do you? I just wanted to be home in case you guys needed anything. Paige is going to text me all the assignments so I won't be too far behind." She wrung the hem of her shirt, nervously meeting her father's eye.

"My daughter is skipping school for me. I've never been more proud," He bent over and kissed her forehead.

"Gee, thanks." She rolled her eyes, but smiled up at him.

"Love you, kid."

"You too, Dad."

Martha smiled at her family, then shot the study a look, "Richard, is Kate okay?"

"Yes, Mother. I finally got her to agree to taking her pain medicine so I need to hurry, in case she changes her mind." He darted off to the kitchen, grabbed the orange pill bottles, then drifted through the living room again to find Kate still leaned against the arm of the couch.

"You okay?" he murmured, shutting the door quietly behind him.

"Fine." She rubbed her eyes and sat up slowly, using her left arm to plop the right one on her lap.

"Okay…" He sat down next to her, shook a couple pills into her hand, then handed her the glass of water from his desk. She tossed the capsules back then took a swig of water, shuddering slightly as she handed the glass back to Castle. He did the same and then leaned back, setting the pills and water on an end table.

"You wanna go back to bed?" he brushed his fingers over her hair gently. His fingers spasmed and pulled on her hair, "Sorry."

She waved him away, grabbing his hand."No. I'm fine. How're your mother and Alexis?"

"They're alright. Alexis skipped school for us. You should feel honored." Kate chuckled and leaned into his side.

"Wow, I do."

"Yeah. She thought I'd be angry when she told me she was skipping."

"Silly girl."

"I told her I'd never been more proud."

Kate laughed, and some of the tension in Castle's chest eased, "I bet she loved that."

His hand crept back to her cheek, "Are you sure you don't want to go back to sleep?" His thumb skirted the bruise colored crescents under her eyes.

She turned away from his attention and forced herself to her feet, "C'mon, your kid skipped school to be with you. Better head out there."

He sighed, "Kate." He caught her relatively uninjured wrist in his hand and pulled her back, "We were going to talk."

She leaned back her head, eyes closed and let out a slow breath, "Yeah. I ... "

"What's scaring you so much?"

"It's not over." She tried to cross her arms but the brace made it impossible so she settled for picking at the edge of her shirt again, " I thought that when we got out, this case would be over, one way or another and it's still... Your mother and my dad and Alexis ... and you. I can't let anything happen to you and the likelihood of something happening increases the longer this case goes on."

"Nothing is going to happen to us." He tried to step to her but she took a corresponding step back, keeping the distance between them.

"You don't know that, Castle. We thought nothing was going to happen when we went to sleep that day." The nails of her good hand were digging painfully into her palm.

"I know. We just have to have faith that we'll be safe and that the detail on the building won't be fooled again."

"Have faith? Castle, that's just naive. Someone out there wants us dead and 'faith' won't keep them away."

"Okay, Kate, what's bothering you? Because this can't be all of it. Yeah, it's scary, but not any worse that some of the other things we've been through."

"What's worse?" Her voice climbed to a pitch, "What's worse, Castle our families are involved. Johnson went after the people he did for a reason and someone killed him for a reason and Johnson had PTSD."
"A lot of people have PTSD, Kate. He was also schizophrenic."

"Yeah, he went completely freaking crazy. What if I fall over that way? How am I going to protect you guys if I'm fucking nuts." There was silence after her confession. His chest tightened again as he watched her antagonize over (what he considered to be) a non issue.

"Kate, you are not like Johnson."

"I could be. We don't know!" she was pacing furiously by that point and he shot out a hand to calm her.

"Kate." He waited until she sighed and looked up into his face painfully slowly, "If you go crazy, I'll be by your side the whole time, making sure you take your meds."

"What if I hurt someone though?" The energy that had been powering her for the last few minutes seemed to spill away and she sagged a little.

"Babe, you don't have it in you to hurt someone who didn't deserve it."

"Castle, you call me babe one more time, I swear to God-"

He laughed, pulling her against his chest, "I love you."

"Yeah, yeah," She muttered into his chest.

They stayed like that for a moment, twined together before he bent, pressed his lips to her forehead, "I won't let anything happen to you."

She sighed again and pulled away from him, "Come on. Your mother and Alexis are probably wondering what's going on."

XXX

The four of them spent the day curled on the couch, flipping between shows and movies, snacking on whatever Alexis pulled out from the kitchen. Martha insisted that they pause on a documentary about an eccentric old woman in the theatre and they spent the hour that it lasted, giggling and aw-ing at her antics and the love that she and her husband found.

"Carol is an absolute doll." Martha sighed as the credits rolled, "She and Harry were made for each other. Only took them 50 something years to get together." She shot Rick and Kate a significant look and both looked away, slightly embarrassed at being compared to the older couple.

Jim called Kate at half past three, promised he was home and fine and asked if her police friends outside would like some sandwiches.

"Are they that obvious?" Kate winced, leaning against the kitchen island.

"I was trying to find them."

Kate sighed and dragged a hand through her hair.

"Don't worry, Katie, they're not that conspicuous."

"Yeah, okay, Dad. Everything okay there?"

"Just fine, sweetie. Stop worrying about me and start focusing on healing, okay?" He hung up soon after that, promising to check in again soon.

"He okay?" Castle asked, sidling up next to her, and trying to pop his back. He grimaced at the pull in his chest and Kate touched his arm. He nodded in answer to her silent concern.

"Yeah. Saw my detail. But... I think he's alright." She tried to stifle a yawn and sagged against the counter, "Is there drowsy shit in that medicine?" she slurred.

Castle chuckled and checked the possible side effects on both of their medicines. Yep, drowsiness was the first one.

"Sorry, yeah."

"Ugh." She groaned, "Don't wanna sleep."

"I do." he laid his head down on his arms, "Pleaseeeee?" he whined.

"Castle."

"Please, I'll be right there."

She didn't have the energy to argue, "Fine. Yeah, let's sleep."

He grabbed her fingers loosely and led them through the living room, "We're taking a nap," He sighed and led them through the study, listening to Kate bid his daughter and mother good night (good afternoon? He was too tired to decide which it was.)

"Bathroom?" He asked, sinking down onto the bed.

"Bed." She muttered, plodding over to the other side and crawling sluggishly under the covers.

"Tired there, Beckett?" He teased drawlingly, head flopping over on his pillow to look at her.

"Shut up, Castle." her eyes slid shut and she stretched out her hand, searching for his under the covers. He found hers and twisted their fingers together.

They were asleep before anymore could be said.

XXX

Kate was awoken what felt like minutes later when the bed started moving. Her head lolled to the side, trying to ask Castle if he was feeling the same thing when she realized that it was he who was causing the frantic movement of the mattress and as she watched he whimpered her name. Beads of sweat gathered at the base of his neck and along his forehead.

"Kate. No, Kate. So sorry. Trying. Don't leave me. Love you." He twisted on his side, grunted and twitched before crying out again.

Her heart crept to her throat and she reached out her good hand to brush through his hair, "Castle, hey, wake up."

He leaned into her touch a little but didn't wake, "Stay with me."

Her mouth dried as she heard him, rremembering the words he'd whispered brokenly while curled over her in the cemetery, blood pumping from her chest.

" up, I'm right here." She shook his shoulder and he rolled toward her, gasping, eyes flashing wide open, "Hey, it's okay."

"Kate." His voice cracked and then she was being hauled against his chest, coughing out a gasp of pain as he squeezed her, but she didn't care because he was shaking so hard, clearly terrified, "Oh, Kate. Kate, I love you so much."

"Castle, look at me, what happened?" She pulled away just enough to see his face, crystalline eyes brimming with tears, "Hey, it's okay," She kissed him softly then leaned back "I'll be right back." She tumbled out of bed and hurried to the bathroom as quickly as she could, wetting a washcloth, before flicking off the light and crawling back up beside him.

"What happened?" She passed the cloth over his cheek , then his forehead, erasing all traces of tears and sweat. He closed his eyes at the contact of the cool cloth and didn't speak until she had finished and set the washcloth down on the bedside table. Then he pulled her on half on top of him, so that her head was tucked between his shoulder and chin.

"You died." he choked out, brushing a hand over her hair, "Johnson stabbed you and I couldn't get to you and... you bled out. And you were crying. And I was just... Stuck." She can hear his terror and anger and pain making his voice brittle and she cupped the side of his head again, scratching her nails lightly over his scalp.

"I'm right here. I've got you. I'm okay."

"I love you."

"I love you too. Shhh. We're going to be fine." They continued whispering reassurances until Castle stopped shaking and his breathing evened against the top of her head.

"I'm so sorry." She whispered, turning to kiss his neck. Tears stung the backs of her eyes, hating herself for the pain she was continuing to cause him.

"Not your fault." She could have sworn he was sleeping, "It's okay. We'll be okay."

"Go back sleep, babe."

"One of these days, we'll talk about this double standard you have going." He slurred, brushing his lips sloppily against her temple.

"Sleep for now though."

"You too. Sorry I woke you."

"Shut up. Don't even worry about that."

"You need sleep too."

"Hush. Sleep, Castle."

"Mmm." He hummed and buried his face further in her hair.

"I love you." She murmured bunching up part of his shirt in her fist.

"Love you too, babe."

"Castle."

"Double standards," he grumbled before they were both out again.