A/N: W-wow! The amount of reviews astounded me! You don't know how happy I was! :) I'll reply to them after a few notes about this chapter~

I think, pretty soon, you all will be seeing the end result of Naoto's inner-struggles, and I've pretty much figured out where I'm going with everything - the Shadow, Naoto's identity and role in society, her gender confusion, and her developing relationship with Kanji. This chapter is kind of here to hint at it, as well as show the beginnings of Kanji and Naoto's development away from each other (and yes, for those of you who wanted more of Kanji's POV, you do get to see more of it when Naoto's away~). But don't worry, just because they develop as characters away from each other, it doesn't mean they still won't be together! They've only been dating for such a short time, after all. Hehe. They've still got a lot ahead of them! (Including the kiss scene, you know? The scene in this chapter might not be what you guys wanted, but as a note, that actually happened to me when I tried to kiss a much taller guy friend XD.)

Also, I have no idea what the hell Sousei is like, so I'm basically making it up. For the sake of this story. c: I'm really hoping he's not too far off from whatever his character is in PxDN, but since I haven't read it yet (it's so hard to get my hands on it!), I'm kind of basing it off of what I know of similar characters (Aigis and Labrys, to be exact)... we haven't seen much of him yet, though, but expect him to show up more often. ;D

Now, in response to some of the reviews! (Not all of them... sorry ^^)

Tsukiko and Moonface: I really really love the points you two are bringing up! It's given me a lot to think about. I think Tsukiko has already been saying she(?) wants to see Kanji with a Shadow, before, but I couldn't really think of a problem that Kanji could have that WOULD manifest another Shadow. Like Moonface said, it's been established that Kanji is sure of who he is and what he wants, but Tsukiko is also right in that things can change for him, because like Naoto, he's only human (and as her Shadow said, humans are always inevitably changing). Thank you both for your reviews, and I like your ideas, but I'm going to head the story in my own direction (whether you have influenced it or not, we shall see xD)... so I hope you look forward to it!

phatmon: I think everyone's hoping they're together in the end. XD Otherwise this wouldn't be a KanjixNaoto fic. :3 I wonder, after today's chapter, would you like to see more drama or more romance (phone romance... xD) between the couple and the people around them? (This question is open to everyone, by the way. I'd love to hear your thoughts on where you want this story to head, even if it might not be in the same direction I'm thinking. But remember, you guys do have influence!)

hee7: It's okay, I understand. I'm kind of the same way (especially with WIPs... Dx bad habit). Thank you for taking the time to review though! I know you're kind of behind, but I hope when you catch up you'll have more wonderful things to say. I'm glad you like my story enough to keep up with it, at least!

That's it for now. I'm still doing that Naoto art (I didn't expect it to take this long! Dx) so you can still find my livestream updates on Twitter. School's coming up soon so by next week I might be super busy! I'll give you an update if my GLC update schedule might be changing soon. As always, read and review!

.~.~.~.~.~.

Chapter 14: Five Years The Same

.~.~.~.~.~.

"Hey Naoto-kun," Rise caught her friend as she was heading out of Tatsumi Textiles. The blue-haired detective stopped and waited for Rise to catch up. "You're going to America soon right?"

"Yes." Naoto nodded. After their excursion in the TV world, at least she was looking better. "I'm leaving in two days. Why? Did you want me to get something for you?"

"Aw, that'd be sweet, Naoto-kun!" Rise giggled, latching onto the shorter woman's arm, forcing her to continue to walk. "But that's not what I was gonna ask."

Naoto rolled her eyes. "Then what did you want?"

"Well… y'know how yesterday, I asked if Yamato-Takeru was really a guy, and you said that you still thought of yourself as one?" Rise asked carefully, watching Naoto's expression.

"…Yes," She answered slowly, waiting for the maroon-haired woman to continue.

"It got me to thinking about stuff. Like… what your real problem was." Rise shrugged. "I know you want to figure stuff out on your own, but I might or might not be onto something here, so hear me out, okay?"

Naoto gave her a pointed look, silent as they walked down the shopping district street.

"Over the past five years, you definitely self-identified as female—you tried pretty hard, you told me." Rise didn't look at her, "But… before that, wasn't it that you felt that society wanted you to be male, because your interests were considered unfeminine?"

"…What?" Naoto blinked, "No, I felt, for myself, that I needed to be male to fulfill the roles of a male-oriented career field."

"If that were true," Rise spoke in that matter-of-fact voice she sometimes used when she was proving a point, "you wouldn't have returned to being a girl so quickly after we rescued you. Again, it was the work of society—or at least, us." Sharp eyes found bewildered wide ones. "If you had really wanted to be a man, you would have stayed that way after everything that happened. But I think some part of you really wanted to be a girl again, Naoto-kun. And no one had a problem with that—not even you."

"Looking at it from a completely different point of view… how unlike you, Rise-chan." Naoto sighed, "Perhaps you're right. Perhaps I only wanted to be a male to conform to society's pressure to begin with."

"Y'know, it's like that saying about looking at the glass half-full." Rise grinned, "Maybe you're not a man stuck in a woman's body. Maybe you're a woman stuck in a man's world—that's all. Maybe that's where your problem really stemmed from."

Naoto blinked. "Is that… so." She wondered if Rise was purposefully trying to confuse her already mixed up feelings.

"Hey, the world's changing now, too! You helped ensure that. It's no longer a man's world, right?" There was that Rise-brand smile, bright and sparkling. This made Naoto push aside the thoughts of the brunette's supposed attempts to confuse her—Rise really was trying to help, after all.

"You've given me a lot to think about, Rise-chan."

"Mmm-hm!" Rise giggled proudly, "Now, that aside—I was talking with Yosuke-sempai and Kuma-kun yesterday night. We wanted to ask you something, sorta."

"Eh?"

"C'mon, let's go meet everyone at Junes!" Rise dragged her along, pulling her by the arm she still held.

"Huh? Wait, I—"

"Oh, come on, you weren't busy, were you?" The pop idol giggled knowingly. When Naoto didn't answer, she knew she was right. "Let's go!"

Naoto sighed in exasperation and allowed Rise to drag her to Junes. When they got to the food court—their Special HQ, as always—Naoto saw not only Yosuke and Kuma there, but also Chie and Yukiko.

"Yo," Chie waved. Everyone else followed suit, greeting the new arrivals casually.

"Uh, hello, everyone." Naoto blinked, taking a seat as Rise finally let her go.

"So, uh," Yosuke spoke up, "Guess we better get to the point. Rise-chan told us about your Shadow."

"…" Naoto shot a glance at her friend, who shrugged. She sighed—well, they would have found out eventually, and Rise never did promise to keep her mouth shut.

"We wanna help you, Naoto-kun," Chie leaned over, "We get why you didn't tell us before. But now that we know, let us lend a hand, okay?"

"I… appreciate it," Naoto replied slowly, "But it's under control. The Shadow has not gone berserk and…"

"Not the point," Yukiko interrupted, "It has nothing to do with the TV world—it's about you. We're your friends, Naoto-kun, so if something's wrong, tell us. Whatever we can do that might help you understand yourself—and your Shadow—better, we'll do it."

"Yeah, if you spoke up back then, kuma, I think we would've understood better, maybe, kuma!" Kuma chimed in.

Naoto stared at them in confusion. Rise patted her on the back in a friendly manner.

"We just don't wanna see anything happen to you, Naoto-kun—even if the Shadow's under control, we don't know what will happen—you can still end up hanging from the wires." Rise said, "So… if we can stop that, we will."

"I understand your concern. But trust me—I won't do anything so reckless this time." Naoto nodded, "Thank you all for your offer to help me… when the time comes that I need to face my Shadow, I know you'll be there."

"Of course we will." Yukiko smiled, "Now, uh, wasn't there something else we needed to talk about?" She glanced at Chie.

"Right." Chie nodded, "Naoto-kun, we wanted to apologize."

"For what?" Naoto blinked.

"For assuming you were a girl," Yukiko said awkwardly, "I mean, you are one, but… we should have taken your gender issues more seriously. You even told us not to treat you differently, and… we still emphasized the fact that you are—were—a girl. We just saw you as just this girl who masqueraded as a boy, and we assumed that you could easily drop the act at any time. We never considered that it wasn't an act."

"Oh. It's alright, it's understandable." Naoto shook her head in dismissal, "I needed to face my physical reality."

"Yeah, but it ain't right," Yosuke crossed his arms, "You didn't like it, did you?"

Naoto paused, taking a moment to realize that they had, in the past, noticed how uncomfortable it was for her to be forced into feminine situations. "…No. I didn't. But I needed to live with it."

"Need?" Rise poked her shoulder, "Or had to, because you didn't stop us?"

"Perhaps I wanted to." The blue-haired detective shrugged, "It was… as you said earlier, Rise-chan—some part of me did accept that I was female. Back then, I was a boy, even if I was not. Now, I am a girl, but even still… I am not."

Yukiko shook her head. "We wanted to say that we were wrong back then. We forced a change upon you and didn't grasp or appreciate that you didn't need to change… just because we found out your secret." Naoto had underestimated Yukiko's ability to understand, in the past. But Yukiko, strangely enough, was probably the one who most readily sympathized with her, despite never knowing the pain and suffering of her true problems. "I don't know how we had thought it back then, but for some reason, it just seemed that your secret being revealed would somehow 'fix' things… like you could go back to being a girl after everyone found out—but that wasn't the problem, was it?"

"The problem was that you had never really been a girl to start with, were you. There was nothing to 'fix', really." Chie nodded, "It wasn't a matter of you just disguising yourself as a boy, but that you wanted to be a boy, and we ignored that. So… we're sorry."

Naoto sighed, looking down at the table and keeping her gaze there. "Yes, it's true that back then, it seemed like that… but really, I'm okay with it. It was… something I reminded myself at the end of every day—that while in my heart, I was a boy, the person in the mirror wasn't. You all helped me face that. I know it. So you don't have to apologize for it."

"But that's not the issue!" Yosuke frowned, "Look, your Shadow… the one that was a child and an adult at the same time… it was like that, right? I guess we assumed you were like that. Someone who had two selves to switch between and could easily swap faces at will—but instead of child to adult, it was male to female. But you're not your Shadow—well, you are, but… it's different. We were trying to make you be someone you weren't, and that's way worse than assuming you weren't someone you are."

"And still I went along with it. My actions created the dichotomy, didn't it? Back then, I did think—it wasn't fair that I had to choose one or the other to begin with. So I didn't." The detective woman didn't look up, "These past five years, I've settled on being a tangle of both male and female, something twisted into one… and I've been okay with that. Even if the rest of the world will see it differently."

"So this all begs the question," Yukiko spoke again, bringing Naoto's gaze upward, "Do you want us to continue treating you as a woman, so that you can learn to accept it?"

"Or do you want us to treat you as a man?" Chie's eyes never left Naoto, and she could see a light of genuine concern there.

"I…" Naoto sighed. Kanji had asked her something similar last night, and to that, she had let him do whatever he wanted. But her friends… given the opportunity to make their own choice, would they be just as understanding?

"I'm not gonna pretend I really understand, kuma," Kuma piped up, "But does Nao-chan have to be either, kuma?"

Everyone looked over at him.

"Well, yesterday, Nao-chan said that she might be both, or neither, kuma. Can't Nao-chan be that, kuma?" The blonde bear boy tilted his head innocently.

"That doesn't help with the pronoun list, Kuma-kun." Chie chuckled.

"…He's right, though." Naoto shrugged, standing up. "I'm both and neither, for all I know. So… I'm going to tell you what I told Kanji." She squared her shoulders, folding her arms, "Call me whatever you want. I'll be okay with it, either way."

"Naoto-kun," Rise put her hand on her friend's arm, pulling her down again. "Even if you are… I don't think we are. Perceptions count—we oughta know that more than anyone."

"Damn straight."

Naoto blinked, looking behind her. Kanji was standing there, his arms crossed. How long had he been there? She hadn't heard him come up, and he wasn't exactly the most discreet of their friends.

"Kanji…"

"I ain't smart, Naoto, but I'm not completely dumb. I know what you said last night, but I kinda heard what you didn't say." He sat down next to her at the table, his hands stuffed in his pockets, "I know you've still got a lot to figure out… but it ain't just about you."

"To put it bluntly, Naoto-kun," Rise said, still on her other side, "when it comes to what other people want to make of us… it does matter. Back then, Kanji-kun couldn't figure that out, so he became something they hated and he didn't know how to stop. My trap was that I was too good at being what everyone else wanted. I forced myself to fit, and he pushed it all away… you did both."

"And it still didn't work out any better, huh?" Yosuke leaned one elbow on the table, resting his head on his hand.

"A lot of us spent most of our lives letting other people judge us, or decide things for us—letting them shape who we are." Yukiko said quietly, "And we spent a lot of time judging ourselves too, for not being able to meet other people's expectations. But… Yu-kun told me once that our problems were all similar—not because we had the same problems, but because we all painted the world black and white, just to make it harder on ourselves."

"…What do you mean?" Naoto asked, her eyebrows furrowing.

"Stay and inherit the inn, leave and find my own path—those were the only two options I had seen back then." Yukiko closed her eyes, "They were the only two I acknowledged. Then… Yu-kun came along, and he showed me that there were more options… a compromise. The gray area in this black and white world."

"Same here." Kanji muttered. "Everything was pointless and a big waste of time to me, I was either what people wanted or what they didn't—I chose to be what they didn't. But then… he showed up and changed everything by making me want to change myself."

Yosuke nodded in agreement. "He made us—me realize I could be more than what I was—more than some comedic side relief, or a jackass no one liked. I didn't know what I could to be instead, or if I'd ever figure it out—still haven't, really—but he helped me work up the courage to do it."

"Me too, kuma!" The bear had felt the need to put his two cents in. Yu had really had that kind of effect on all of their lives, didn't he?

"Maybe it was sempai's perceptions that allowed us to change," Rise stared carefully at Naoto, "but what we're trying to say is, no matter how much you want to believe that you're okay with something, I don't think anything will truly change except what other people believe to be true. So what do you want us to believe of you?"

Naoto looked down at the table, trying to find her own "gray area". But this was so… sudden. And she didn't know how to handle it. "…I—I'm still trying to figure that out." She finally managed. "So I'll repeat myself… call me whatever you want. I'll tell you if I want to be called otherwise."

"That… sounds like a good compromise." Yosuke smiled honestly.

She stood up. Kanji looked a little surprised, but he stood too, taking her hand. Was she upset? She looked upset.

They stared at her, and she stepped back, heading toward the food court entrance with Kanji in tow. No one stopped her. "I'm going to visit Nanako-chan. See you later."

After she disappeared, Yukiko spoke up. "So… what does that mean? Do we still call her a girl?"

"Dude, that's confusing as hell," Yosuke's smile dropped and he ran his hand through his hair, "That shorty is real hard to figure out, huh…"

"I'm gonna call her a girl as long as she dresses like one." Chie shrugged, "But if she starts binding again, I'll change it."

"Sooo… we're sticking with calling Nao-chan a girl, kuma?"

They talked for a minute about their decision, but then noticed that a certain normally-bubbly pop idol had been silent for a while. She looked like she was thinking hard about something, digesting some train of thought. "Rise-chan?" Yukiko tilted her head. "Is something wrong?"

Rise grinned widely. "…Guys, Naoto-kun called Kanji-kun Kanji! And Kanji-kun called Naoto-kun Naoto!"

Everyone rolled their eyes. Rise started babbling about how cute the relationship was, completely forgetting about their gender-confused topic of the day.

.~.~.~.~.~.

As Kanji walked down the riverbank with Naoto, he knew there was something he had to say. Naoto's mind was still reeling with the meeting at Junes, and he wanted to let her take it in, but he also wanted to say something to make it better. To make her feel better. He didn't like seeing her sad or depressed—and when she was like this, whatever this was, he just wanted to give her a damn hug and make it all better.

But he couldn't, could he? He didn't really know how to make it all better. He didn't even understand the full extent of Naoto's problems.

Back then, Naoto had been the perfect boy—more than what Kanji ever thought he could be. 'He' was cool, collected, smart, unflappable, untouchable. 'He' had every trait Kanji didn't have and couldn't even dream of having. He would never be as perfect as Naoto—and he had wanted to be Naoto as much as he wanted to be with her. But after rescuing her from the Secret Laboratory… he saw that she wasn't perfect, he saw the side of her heart she kept buried deep inside. And still he wanted to be with her more than before—because even if she was better at hiding her problems, the fact that she was just as mixed-up as he had been made him want to never leave her, just like her Shadow had begged her not to.

He wanted to understand her problems—he did, but only a little bit. He wanted to show her that he did understand the bits and pieces of it. He wanted to prove that he could understand the rest of it—he knew he could manage at least that, if he could only find the right words to say—to ask her—to open her heart and let him have even the smallest peek at it.

Maybe Kanji didn't know the intimate details of Naoto's problems, but he knew Naoto. He knew that if she said something enough, she'd wind up believing it—and maybe she knew that too. If he asked her something, she would give the same answer over and over until he was convinced, and maybe she would have convinced herself that was the truth too.

So he stayed silent, walking beside her and occasionally stealing glances as her distant blue eyes. He couldn't tell what she was thinking, but he knew that she was trying to sort out whatever problems the team had raised to her—trying to sort out herself.

.~.~.~.~.~.

Naoto couldn't help but think Rise was right. In the intervals between jobs and when she wasn't working on her career, she saw that those "empty spaces" were the only times that she wasn't pressured to be anything. It was times like that when society's eyes were not looking at her, expecting everything of her—she didn't have to be a male, and she didn't try to be. It was those times that she returned to being a female, and she didn't really think about it.

She remembered a time when she was younger, when she would come home to the estate after a long day at work and take off the bandages that restricted her life—when she looked into the mirror and reminded herself that she was not what everyone thought she was.

She was not a boy prince, nor an adult, but she was smart and she knew what she was doing—that was the only comfort she took, at the most confusing time in her life.

But now, when everything was clearer, and she was more mature… what did she think when she looked into the mirror?

If she was looking into one now, she would have thought, I'm not what I think I am. It didn't matter what everyone else thought anymore. At least, that's what she still stubbornly wanted to believe, even if everyone else said otherwise.

Yes, Rise was right indeed—she had not started wanting to be a male on her own. When she was small, she was perfectly content with her gender and age—she was content with the life her parents had given her. It was when she realized society expected her to be a male detective, like the ones in her novels, that she had started to try to be a male.

But that was wrong, wasn't it?

Perhaps there was something else to this. Yamato-Takeru seemed to be hinting at it.

Trying to be the ideal detective, like Sherlock Holmes… it was absurd, her older self thought now. Kanji had once told her, in the year before her departure from Inaba, that she wasn't a detective in a novel, and she didn't need to be. She existed "here"—she was a detective in real life—and she was a damn good detective, regardless of her age and gender. This was proven by the couple dozen cases she had solved, on her own or otherwise, and by the skill she had prided herself on her entire life.

When had she started trying to be a man, she wondered? There didn't seem to be an exact time—it seemed like something she had wanted her whole life. But she remembered—she remembered a time when she could close her eyes and live in blissful ignorance of her own two-faced nature.

Thinking about it now, maybe the problem wasn't "when" or "how" or even "why". Naoto—who was always accustomed to the definite, her life revolving around hard facts and evidence—wasn't quite sure she could determine whether a real problem even existed, much less how to solve it.

Whatever answer she was looking for, she hadn't stopped to think there wasn't even a question to answer.

.~.~.~.~.~.

Naoto said goodbye to most of her friends at Yasoinaba Station—Rise would be leaving to go back to show business soon too, so Naoto wouldn't be able to see her when she got back from America. So they said their farewells there, and Naoto told her former upperclassmen and Kuma that she would see them when she returned.

Now she sat on the train to Okina City, leaning on Kanji as they stared out the window opposite of them. They were quiet, but it was a comfortable silence.

"You didn't have to come." She said quietly.

"Wanted to." He refuted easily.

They fell into silence again. The trip didn't take long, only two stops away, but the train was slow and time felt slower. Eventually, they got off at Okina City and took a cab to the airport.

Naoto was actually looking forward to this, despite her previous experience in America. She needed to get back to work, though—she needed that distraction from her inner turmoil, even if it was only for a little while. She just wanted to escape to "reality" for a couple weeks, and hope that it would give her enough time to sort herself out—because that was the only time she really could sort herself out.

At least, that was what she wanted to think.

"Y'sure nothing bad's gonna happen in America?" Kanji asked while they were waiting at the terminal gate. They had been there for the past hour or so, and getting through bag check and security had been a bore. They hadn't talked much, as Kanji was busy worrying to himself.

"I'm sure, Kanji." Naoto reassured him for the hundredth time, "I've told you this before, I don't need protection of any sort. I'll be fine."

"Yeah, but… you'll be alone." Kanji frowned.

"It's not like I haven't been alone before." Naoto protested, "Stop worrying."

"I know, I know, geez," He ran his hand through his hair, "I can't help but worry, you know that."

Naoto sighed almost fondly. She stopped their conversation when an announcer called her flight number. "I've got to go now, Kanji." She stood, "I'll call you when I get there."

"Y-yeah." He nodded, accompanying her as people lined up at the gate doors, "Um, I know you're all about finishing your work an all, but it's America—so, uh, have fun?"

"I will. I appreciate your attempt to lighten the mood." Naoto chuckled, "Perhaps I really should bring back some souvenirs for everyone."

"I'm sure Ma would like that." Kanji smiled.

Naoto handed her plane ticket to the gate attendant, who nodded after checking it and allowed her through. She turned back to Kanji briefly and said, "I'll see you in a few weeks, then."

"Have a safe—" Kanji was cut off when Naoto grabbed his shoulders, pulling him down awkwardly—she had staggered a little when she got on her tip-toes, always too short for her own liking. He felt her lips on his cheek, and his face exploded into a bright red blush.

When she pulled back, he saw that she was also blushing, smiling softly to herself. "Bye, Kanji." She nodded, picking up her carry-on bag and heading briskly through the gate.

"Uh, yeah, bye, Naoto." He said dumbly, standing there for a moment with his hand on his cheek. Had Naoto just—kissed him? Well, yeah, on the cheek, but—that still counted right?

His thoughts reeled for a good three minutes. When he regained his senses, he went over to the window, looking out to the plane that Naoto was in. He couldn't spot her—he wondered if she could spot him?

He stayed there until the plane took off, and then he left the airport. He'd take a cab back to the station, still slightly dazed in daydream.

Damn it, I already miss him.

.~.~.~.~.~.

Late in the evening, After Kanji closed up the shop and had dinner with his mother, his cell phone rang. It was Naoto, calling just as she had promised. He greeted her enthusiastically.

"I don't like jetlag." Naoto told him with a little laugh. She had told him this many times before, but it was still nice to hear her laugh. They talked about random things—the time difference, when Naoto would get to work, how Kanji had to deal with Rise—before Kanji brought up the kiss.

Naoto sounded like she was blushing shyly as she admitted, "Huh? Well… honestly, I was thinking about that 'first kiss', but I got too nervous and…"

"Is that why you tripped?"

"O-oh. You noticed." Naoto chuckled a little. "Sorry… should I have asked first?"

"N-no, not at all!" Kanji stammered out quickly, "Um, but, uh, maybe it would've been less awkward if you did? Or if I did?"

Somehow it was easier to talk on the phone than it was in real life. They had spent five years on the phone, after all—it was familiar and comforting to them.

"Perhaps we can do it properly when I get back."

Kanji blinked. She could probably hear the heat rushing to his face. "Um… yeah." He coughed a little, opting to change the subject. "So, what's the plan? That is, when you get back?"

"The prefectural police have requested I help them with a case in Chiba." She answered easily, "I will be going there shortly after I turn Dr. Nakamura over to the police and return to the estate."

"Oh… so you're not going to be back in Inaba for a while?" Kanji sounded a little disappointed.

"Probably not. I wouldn't mind if you joined me in Chiba, though." Naoto replied, as if it would lighten his mood, "Actually, a friend of mine is there—I think I told you about her, the little mute girl? She's told me in the past that she wanted one of your plush charms. This would be a good opportunity to see her again and give her one."

"Ah, that girl with the weird name? I thought you said she lived in London." Kanji sounded surprised.

"She's an adult now, I think she can live wherever she wants." He heard a shuffling, like Naoto was shrugging. "I'll have to email her, though—I haven't spoken to her in a while."

There were very few people Naoto kept in contact with after closing a case—that girl must have made an impression. Kanji would be glad to meet her.

"She sounds nice. I think I'll figure something out—maybe she can help make my dolls popular in Chiba." Kanji grinned.

"Does that mean you'll go with me?"

"Sure, why not?" Kanji chuckled. "But you'll have to come back to Inaba first."

"I think I can do that."

.~.~.~.~.~.

Inaba seemed to have returned to its normal, uneventful, sleepy-town state. There was nothing interesting going on lately, and not many people stopped by Tatsumi Textiles.

When Kanji wasn't watching the shop, he was teaching Hiro and some of his friends how to make dolls. When they were at school, Kanji did random housework and made dolls on his own. Sometimes he went to the bookstore—he didn't read much, but Naoto had sure made it look interesting, so he thought he'd give it a try.

He didn't wait for Naoto's calls—with the time difference, he didn't want to wake her in the middle of the night. She was probably busy anyhow. He didn't mind though—whenever Naoto called, it was in the morning for him—they would talk for a while about how the trial was going, and then they would talk about some other random things before Naoto had to go to sleep, tired from a long day at work. The morning calls always made Kanji smile, though, and he went through his day feeling happy and giddy.

Mrs. Tatsumi giggled at her son's behavior, and occasionally stole the phone from Kanji to say hi to Naoto. Naoto gladly spoke to the old woman, while Kanji pouted in the background.

It was one of these mornings, when Mrs. Tatsumi once again took the phone and left Kanji to tend the shop, that Kanji got a peculiar visitor. A tall man with jet-black hair and light purple eyes came into the shop, looking around with a calculating calmness. He was strange—he wore black and red clothes that looked metallic, weird headphone and shoulder things, and for some reason he had a white scarf around his neck—who wore a scarf in the summer?

"Can I… help you?" Kanji asked slowly. Maybe you need something to improve that weird fashion sense of yours. He thought to himself.

"I," The man spoke—his voice was deep, but it sounded soft and strangely innocent, not unlike Yu's voice—and his lavender gaze fell on the brown haired man in front of him before he continued, "am looking for Shirogane Naoto. I have heard that she is staying here."

Kanji blinked in surprise. Someone was looking for Naoto? Maybe it was a client. "You missed him by a week. He's out of town, now." He said, earning a strange look from the man, "Did you need something from him? Maybe I can take a message or something."

"…No." The man turned to leave. Kanji contemplated stopping him, but after a moment, decided to let it go. The man was already gone, disappeared beyond the shop doors.

"Weird." Kanji scratched his head, turning back to the display racks and reorganizing them. He mumbled to himself about ordering the items by type of fabric and color, trying to figure out the best way to rearrange them.

"Kan-chan!" Mrs. Tatsumi came back to the front, "Shirogane-san said she had to go, so she told me to tell you good night!"

"It's morning, but I get what you mean." He shrugged. Maybe he could call Naoto back later and ask her about that strange man who came to find her.

.~.~.~.~.~.

"Sousei-kun is already in Inaba?" Naoto sounded surprised. After Kanji had told her about his encounter with the black-haired man, she immediately confirmed his suspicions that it was her old partner. "I still wonder what he's doing so far out of Yagokoro…"

"Yeah, well, he seemed kinda rude, just like you said," Kanji huffed as he went about screen-printing some fabric for a custom order, "Didn't seem very trusting either."

"Not many people would be, if they're someone like him." Naoto replied, "If you see him again, please tell him I'll be back in a few weeks… and that he shouldn't do anything reckless."

"Define 'reckless'."

"Don't kill anything."

"Got it." Kanji nodded, though he vaguely wondered what Sousei would kill, and why Naoto said "anything"—then again, if it had anything to do with the Midnight Channel, "thing" was probably an accurate description.

"I guess we'll have to postpone Chiba… I'm sure the case can wait a little bit while I deal with whatever Sousei-kun has found."

"So, uh… you know him pretty well, right?" Kanji asked tentatively, "You call him pretty familiarly."

"We were partners for a while." Naoto replied, "And you know the effect of having to deal with a case no one else can. Not to mention the dangers involved—it builds a level of trust that can't be found otherwise."

Kanji hesitated. "Did you two ever…"

"No." The reply was quick and automatic—it made Kanji squirm.

"You didn't even wait for me to finish." He pouted.

"I knew what you were going to ask." Naoto said simply, "Sousei-kun and I were just partners and friends. That's it."

"Oh. Uh." Kanji blinked, "That's… good."

"Were you jealous?"

"He seemed like the tall, dark, mysterious type. Kinda like Yu-sempai." Kanji sighed, "Sorry, it isn't even my right to get jealous, huh? We haven't even been dating that long."

"I never had anything with Yu-san either." Naoto sounded amused, "But… even if Sousei-kun and I did have a thing, it's sweet that you would get jealous, Kanji."

"E-eh?" Kanji blushed, "Um—okay?"

"I told you before, didn't I? I've liked you for all of these five years. So don't worry too much about who might have been interested in me." Naoto reassured him.

"Alright, alright," He smiled a little, "So, uh, I'll keep an eye out for Kurogami, and… yeah."

"I should probably get some rest…"

.~.~.~.~.~.

"His old partner?" Rise perked up, looking interested. "Ooh, it sounds kinky!"

"It's not." Kanji sighed, walking alongside the pop idol as they traversed the south end of the shopping district to get back to the north, "Nothin' happened between them."

"You sure? Maybe Naoto-kun's just trying to spare your feelings." Rise teased.

"Shut it." He looked away, crossing his arms. He trusted Naoto, so he wouldn't go questioning her now. Besides, she wouldn't lie to him—no way.

"But to show up in town so suddenly! Maybe he's here to steal your boyfriend!" The brunette mused.

Kanji ignored her pointedly—after the meeting at Junes, everyone had kind of started using their own pronouns when it came to Naoto. Rise had settled for the complete referral of the detective as a guy, but Kanji remembered that long before that, Rise and the others had always teasingly called Naoto his "boyfriend" just to fluster or annoy him. Now he was impassive about it—his annoyance was directed elsewhere. Mainly at Rise's consistent habit of trying to fluster him until his ears turned red.

"I said, shut it."

"Aw, you're so cute, Kanji-kun!" Rise giggled. "So, what's he like, this Kurogami Sousei guy? I mean, Naoto-kun never said much about him…"

"He kinda looks like sempai… only with a weirder fashion sense." Kanji shrugged. He had only seen the guy for all of maybe two minutes, so he couldn't exactly say much about him.

"Oooh? I wonder if he's single." Rise looked thoughtful. She really did want a guy like Yu, didn't she? Sousei was, by observation, extremely similar—and not only in looks. There was something about his indifferent demeanor and his voice—and the fact that he was also a detective.

"You're really thinking of dating him?" Kanji sighed.

"Why not? Then you and me and Naoto-kun and that detective guy can go on a double date and it'd be all cool!" Rise grinned.

"W-why did you put our names in that order?" The brown-haired man looked flustered. Rise had done her job.

A wicked laugh was his only response. "Oh? You really are worried about him stealing your boyfriend!"

"…"

Kanji blinked, looking up. Despite that the man hadn't said anything, somehow his presence alone felt like he had cleared his throat to interrupt their conversation.

Of course, it was none other than—speak of the devil—Kurogami Sousei. The relatively large man was standing smack-dab in the middle of the sidewalk, pretty much blocking the path even if he didn't mean to. If he had been walking before, he was stopped now, and the pair slowed down in front of him.

"Oh. You're…"

"Hmm? A friend of yours, Kanji-kun?" Rise peered up at the man curiously.

"Not really. That's Kurogami." He answered. Rise lit up brightly in interest.

The almost robotic-looking nod that followed seemed delayed. "I am. You are the one from the textile store." He looked at Kanji, "I… do not think we have introduced ourselves."

"Uh, yeah, we haven't." Kanji blinked, "I'm Tatsumi Kanji. Naoto's boyfriend." He didn't know why he had added the last part. Maybe it was possessiveness. Naoto would probably shoot him for it, though.

Sousei didn't seem fazed, opening his mouth to speak when Rise interrupted. "And I'm Kujikawa Rise!" She said in a sing-song voice, "We've heard about you from Naoto-kun! Nice to meet you!"

There was that mechanical, disinterested nod again. "Nice to meet you. Detective Kurogami Sousei."

"We know." Rise purred, "So, what're you in town for, Kurogami-kun?"

He didn't seem taken aback, or at least caught off-guard, by the use of honorific. He kept a straight face as he answered, "I am investigating something. I cannot disperse the details."

"Aw, that's too bad." Was Rise still trying to flirt with this guy? Despite that he showed no obvious interest? Well, at least she was persistent—a trait Kanji often found quite annoying. "Anything we can do to help?"

The immediate answer: "No." Then there was a pause. "I am sure Detective Shirogane will be able to help me, when she gets back."

"Oh, yeah," Kanji blinked, "He told me to pass on a message. He's gonna be back in a few weeks, and don't kill anything."

Sousei stared at him, looking confused like he was in the shop, and then blinked those strange purple eyes. "Shirogane said that?"

"His exact words were 'don't be reckless', but he clarified." Kanji shrugged.

"You must be pretty strong, if he'd say that." Rise giggled. The look of confusion remained on Sousei's face. Rise noticed. "Something wrong?"

"…I am questioning whether we are speaking of the same Shirogane." Sousei answered in pauses, looking unsure. "You were speaking of her before, as well, and still referred to her as a male."

Kanji wondered exactly how long this guy had been listening to their conversation, but he pushed the thought aside and shook his head. "Nope, same one."

Inside, he was a little proud that Sousei did not know Naoto well enough to have known she had gender issues. Though he didn't exactly know if that was something he should be proud of, it still made it obviously clear that he knew her better.

"But… Shirogane is a female." Sousei said in that as-a-matter-of-fact kind of tone, only it was flat and hard.

"He kinda asked us to call him like this." Rise shrugged, "Y'know, Kanji-kun, I think it definitely creates confusion when only the team's doing it."

"Eh, let'em think whatever." Kanji shrugged indifferently.

"…"

"So, Kurogami-kun, are you busy right now?" Rise gave one of her trademark smiles, "How'd you like to go on a date with Japan's hottest pop idol?"

Sousei still looked confused. "…Excuse me?"

Kanji almost laughed at Rise's expression. It was rare that someone didn't go for the "don't you know who I am" type line. Either that, or Sousei just didn't date in general. Which Kanji would've been totally okay with.

Trying not to be disheartened, Rise perked up, "Yeah, let's go get some coffee or something."

Sousei's face returned to being void of all emotion. "I have business to attend to. I must be going now." And with that, he stepped around them and left.

Rise pouted. Kanji shook his head and chuckled, putting his hand on her hair and giving her a gentle ruffle. "You know, if you want a guy to like you for who you are, you should really stop using that celebrity line."

.~.~.~.~.~.

"Grampa," Naoto spoke up, sitting at the dinner table with Haruka and Yakushiji, "were you ever… disappointed in me?"

"No," Haruka looked surprised, "Why would you even ask such a thing?"

"I was just thinking. I mean—I'm not talking about being a detective or anything. But… did you ever wish that I was really a boy?" Naoto spoke quietly, staring down at her plate.

"I've only ever wished you to be happy." Haruka replied easily, "Boy or girl—whatever you wished to be. I'd never be disappointed if you were one or the other."

"But wouldn't it have made it easier if I were a boy?"

"We can't say that for sure, Naoto." Haruka sighed, glancing down at his own dinner, pushing it around a bit, "But asking 'what ifs' is only useful when it leads to some hard evidence. In this case… there is no evidence."

"Other than that being a girl has made no difference in your investigation abilities, Naoto-sama." Yakushiji piped up.

"Maybe so," Naoto looked up at them, "But it hasn't changed the essential truth that I would not have had so many troubles thus far if I were a boy."

"Naoto… the only essential truth is the one you must serve wholeheartedly as a Shirogane detective." Haruka shook his head, "Boy or girl… you are still the same—and you always will be."

"Isn't that why you stopped disguising yourself?" Yakushiji tilted his head at the eighteen-year-old woman.

"Yes—I've found plenty of good reasons to be 'myself'…" Naoto's gaze trailed to the side, "including that… it never quite felt right to be a boy."

"Oh?" Haruka leaned toward her across the table, curious.

"I don't quite know where this thought is coming from… but… it's a small and unnoticeable voice. Still, that part of my inner self is telling me it's never quite felt right." Naoto frowned at a blank spot on the wall, "While the rest of my whole tells me it is what I should have been born as."

"Does that voice sound like your mother, by any chance?" Yakushiji murmured. Naoto glanced at him, then looked back at the wall as if it were the most fascinating thing in the world. Eating no longer seemed to interest her.

"Tell me," Haruka said, somehow drawing Naoto's gaze back to him, "why part of you says it's never quite felt right. The detective in me is curious."

"Well… the binding is uncomfortable, and I have to think about everything I say and do—and even though I'm just being myself with a different appearance, it just feels fake," Naoto couldn't break her gaze away from her grandfather's intense one, "like—like I'm being someone else entirely… even though I'm not. I mean, I feel more like myself as 'Naoto' than I do as… this. But… I can't shake the feeling that I'm doing something wrong… like… like…" She trailed off, unable to find the right words.

"Like you're always lying?"

Naoto blinked, staring at her grandfather.

"Take some time to think about it," Haruka shrugged, "but perhaps some time as Naoto will show you why 'Naoto' feels like a lie. Maybe then you will see the truth of 'Naoto'."

If Naoto was being honest with herself—something she realized she rarely ever was—she would have realized that Haruka already knew that becoming "Naoto" was her way to escape the truth. What "truth" she was escaping was questionable though—but it felt like it had nothing to do with gender. Perhaps that was something that only Naoto knew, and something "Naoto" desperately denied. Something that she, standing at the in-between of Naoto and "Naoto", didn't yet know she really wanted to find.

But she wasn't being honest with herself. So she pushed away those thoughts of escape—from what, though?—and decided that Haruka was just trying to make her more comfortable with being a girl.

She just nodded, returning to her dinner.