Summary: When Axel is brought back to life to be with Roxas, they start searching for their other friends from the Organization. Through much difficulty they eventually achieve this goal, but what happens when the superior comes back mysteriously one day? How will Xemnas cope with having to live among normal people and being social? And will love find this man who seems to have a giant stick up his ass! lol. Yeah, better than it sounds. Eventual XemnasxSephiroth. Other pairings include akuroku, cleon,soriku,zemyx, and marluxiaxsaix.
Disclaimer: I obviously don't own kingdom hearts cuz if I did the organization would totally be a sex club.lol.i'm horrible. :D I also don't own the lyrics to Kimya Dawson's songs Tree Hugger and Vampire.
Genre: Romance/humor/angst/ action
Rating: T (possibly M in much later chapters)
Warnings: language,shounen-ai,and yaoi.
Author's Note: Well, I'm back with another chapter. Hopefully I can squeeze two more in before school starts. I know I'm capable of at least getting one more chapter in. Hope you guys like this!)
End of Chapter Thirteen: The Safe Zone
"Hey Haydn! Come here! You promised you would let me listen to that song you were talking about earlier, remember?!" Demyx shouted from the fire. Haydn sighed and stood up.
"Sorry Xemnas, it looks like we'll have to continue our conversation later. If I make that kid wait any longer he might send his water clones to drag me back." With that, Haydn walked away. Xemnas sighed. It seemed like something was always ready to interrupt him when he was in the middle of an important conversation. It was all right though; he could be patient, because he would get the information that he wanted eventually.
Chapter Fourteen: Well Kept Secrets
The night sky stretched above everyone's heads. It was hard to believe that so many stars existed. There were plenty of them in Radiant Garden, but they were nothing compared to this. There was a certain beauty to this place that you couldn't find in town.
"Kind of reminds you of Destiny Island, doesn't it?" Sora said to Riku. They were lying on a blanket in each other's arms, staring up at the stars.
"Yeah, it does. Do you miss it there?" Riku asked.
"Sometimes. I love living in Radiant Garden, but every once in a while I miss the island."
"Then I'll tell you what, once this is all over, we can go back to visit."
"I would like that." Sora said as he scooted closer to Riku.
Near the campfire, Demyx and Haydn were swapping stories and playing music. No one seemed to mind much, except for one small individual that was trying to sleep in the cave.
There were only two people in the cave, Saix being one of them. He was currently passed out. Marluxia had dragged him with when he went flower hunting. They were both gone all day, leaving Saix's poor nose to suffer the consequences. The blunette had fallen asleep upon arrival, his senses overloaded from the strong scent of a natural flowery perfume. Saix wouldn't wake up, even with all of the noise coming from outside the cave. Zexion, on the other hand, was not pleased with the constant interruptions from Demyx and Haydn.
Zexion was buried under a blanket, a pillow over his head to block out the noise, though this didn't help much. He could still hear everything that Demyx and Haydn were saying. Or, to be precise, everything they were singing. It seemed as if Demyx had already learned the words to some of Haydn's songs. He could hear them now.
The flower said, "I wish I was a tree"
The tree said, "I wish I could be
A different kind of tree"
The cat wished that it was a bee
What the hell were they singing?! The song made no sense!
The turtle wished that it could fly
Really high into the sky
Over rooftops and then dive
Deep into the sea
At least when Demyx wrote songs they had a deep meaning and were absolutely beautiful! But…but this…this hippie, his music had no important meaning! Stupid, stupid hippie with his stupid indie music!
And in the sea there is a fish
A fish that has a secret wish
A wish to be a big cactus
With a pink flower on it
How dare he grab Demyx's attention so easily! It had taken him months to get Demyx to pay that much attention to him.
And in the sea there is a fish
A fish that has a secret wish
A wish to be a big cactus
With a pink flower on it
What did that damn hippie have that Zexion didn't anyway?! Sure, Zexion couldn't play an instrument, and he sure as hell couldn't sing, but since when had that mattered?!
And the flower
Would be its offering
Of love to the desert
And the desert
So dry and lonely
That the creatures all
Appreciate the effort
Maybe Zexion didn't have the same talents as Haydn, but Zexion was definitely smarter! Well, he was more book smart than Haydn was. He had a feeling that Haydn had a certain type of smarts that Zexion could never have. Damn it! That stupid hippie was still winning!
Et le jackalope a dit
"Je voudrais être un yeti
Pour voler dans la nuit
Et m'en aller loin d'ici"
Mais le yeti a dit
"Je voudrais être un monstre marin
Pour pouvoir rentrer dans la mer
De tous les requins"
But Zexion was much cuter than Haydn! That had to be true! And was that French they were singing?! How the hell had Haydn learned that?! Didn't he grow up in an orphanage?!
And the rattlesnake said
"I wish I had hands so
I could hug you like a man"
And then the cactus said
"Don't you understand
Was it vain to think that he was more attractive? Maybe, but Zexion really didn't care. Sure, Zexion may have, in his own opinion, been more attractive than Haydn, but that didn't mean that Haydn wasn't attractive as well.
My skin is covered with sharp spikes
That'll stab you like a thousand knives.
A hug would be nice
But hug my flower with your eyes"
Damn, that just made things worse! Not only was Haydn attractive, but he also had a certain charm that Zexion knew he could never pull off in a million years.
The flower said, "I wish I was a tree"
The tree said, "I wish I could be
A different kind of tree"
The cat wished that it was a bee
But so what?! Why did it matter if Haydn was attractive, charming, intelligent, and talented?! Zexion knew Demyx better than anyone, so that automatically meant that Haydn didn't matter, right?
The turtle wished that it could fly
Really high into the sky
Over rooftops and then dive
Deep into the sea
But Haydn had captivated Demyx from the moment that they had spoken to one another, and it was just getting worse by the minute. Demyx was barely speaking to him. Would he stop talking to him all together? Zexion began to think about what to do about the current problem until he heard Demyx and Haydn start a different song.
I am a vampire
I am a vampireI am a vampire
I am a vampireI am a vampire, vampire
I am a vampire
I have lost my fangs
What the hell?! Now Zexion was starting to suspect that Haydn was on drugs. There's no way he could write a song like that without being on something! Why couldn't anyone else see that?! Everyone seemed to love him. Even Leon and Axel, who thought Haydn was a bit insane, seemed to love him. Why was that? Why did everyone like him so much? Zexion didn't see anything special about him! Nothing special what so ever!
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I have lost my fangsSo I'm sad and I feel lonely
So I cry and I'm very angry
And I eat some garlic
So I'm no more satanic yeah yeahI am a vampire
and I'm looking in the city
But the pretty girls don't look at me
don't look at meCos' I don't have my fangs
Cos' I have lost my fangs
Especially when he was playing that kind of music! And dear god! Some of the others were singing along! Now they liked his music too, on top of everything else?! This was ridiculous! Zexion had to do something before this got too out of hand! He would never get to sleep with all of that noise; nor would he get Demyx back in bed with him if he let this continue, and it wasn't wise to leave Zexion sleep or sex deprived for too long.
Zexion's hands roamed the dirt ground, trying to find the item that he so desperately needed to get everyone to shut up. In the dim light of the fire, he finally found the item and smirked.
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I have lost my-
"Shut the hell up! Some people are trying to sleep over here!" Zexion yelled as he threw his lexicon out of the cave. It was aimed for Haydn's head, but the brunette had quick reflexes and managed to duck before it could hit him. Demyx, on the other hand, was not so lucky. The second Haydn ducked, the lexicon hit Demyx in the face. Haydn sat up again and blinked at Demyx as he watched him rub his face in pain.
"Your boyfriend's got quite the arm." Haydn said.
"Yeah, I know." Demyx grunted as the pain really started to set in.
'Hmm, I was hoping it would hit Haydn, but I guess having it hit Demyx is acceptable too.' Zexion thought as he stood up and brushed the imaginary dust off of his pajama pants. He huffed as he walked out of the cave. His lips curved up into an almost noticeable smirk as he noticed Demyx's pained expression.
"Ow. Zexy, what did I do?" Demyx asked as he looked up at his purple haired lover. Zexion's gray eyes narrowed.
"Don't Zexy me! If you have to ask what you've done, you obviously haven't been paying any attention!" Zexion yelled as he started to walk towards the woods.
"Wait, Zexion! We'll stop playing music if that's what you want! You can go back to sleep!" Demyx shouted.
"It's too late for that now Demyx."
"Oh come on Zexion. What's wrong?"
"Absolutely nothing! Nothing's wrong Demyx!"
"Then where are you going?!"
"I'm going for a walk! It's not like you would really care! You have other priorities now, don't you?" Zexion yelled as he stomped off into the woods. Demyx's eyes became clouded with worry as he stood up.
"I'm going to go look for him. No telling if those mutts will show up. I don't want Zexy to be alone if they do."
"I wouldn't worry about the mutts." Haydn said. "I'd watch out for the wild animals around here. If they see Zexion they'll think he's easy prey."
Demyx's sea blue eyes became abnormally large.
"ZEXY!! COME BACK!" Demyx yelled as he flailed his arms in the air and ran into the woods.
"Good job, now instead of being afraid of his boyfriend dumping him, he's afraid that he'll get eaten first." Axel said.
"Meh, the wild animals probably won't go near Zexion. He looks small and helpless, but the small amount of meat on him doesn't appeal to most of the animals. They aren't that desperate."
"But what if one of those wild animals is that desperate?"
"Then I'm sure we'll hear the screams."
"You truly are a sick and twisted man…I like it."
"Well that means a lot coming from you bubble butt."
"Hey now!"
"Hehe…bubble butt…why didn't I think of that?" Leon sniggered.
"Oh, you're good Haydn." Axel said.
"You're far too kind, Axel." Haydn said as he lit a cigarette and looked towards the woods, watching for any sudden movement.
Demyx wandered through the dark woods, looking for any signs of movement or a glint of violet hair. Unfortunately, he saw neither. Demyx was starting to get worried. What if something bad had happened? Demyx would never forgive himself if he let Zexion get hurt. The blonde soon came to a clearing in the woods and was relieved to see the small violet haired man sitting a few feet off with his back turned to him.
'Thank god, he's okay.' Demyx though as he ran up to Zexion.
"Zexy…tell me what's wrong." Demyx said gently as he sat down next to Zexion. The violet haired man turned away from his blonde lover.
"I already told you, there's nothing wrong."
Demyx sighed at his boyfriend's cold behavior and realized that he was going to have to be patient if he wanted to find out what was going on.
"All right, I'll just sit here until you're ready to talk."
A few minutes passed and Zexion still refused to talk. Demyx, being his A.D.D self, couldn't take it anymore and started humming and tapping his foot to the beat in his head. Zexion turned to look at him.
"What are you humming?"
"It's a song that Haydn wrote. I really like it. It's really catchy and-
"See! That's exactly what I'm talking about!" Zexion screamed.
"What?!" Demyx said. "What did I say?!"
"You've been saying everything wrong lately, Demyx! Haydn this, Haydn that! Well guess what Demyx, I don't care how much you two have in common, he can not have you! You are mine and mine only, understand?!"
Demyx and Zexion sat and stared at each other for a minute. Zexion was still fuming and Demyx was speechless. It took the blonde a second to process what Zexion had said, but once he had done so, he started to chuckle quietly, which turned into a full scale laugh. Zexion's anger quickly dispersed into stupefaction.
"Why the hell are you laughing?!" Zexion yelled. Was Demyx making fun of him?! Did he think that their relationship was a joke?!
"Oh, I get it now."
"Get what?"
"You're jealous."
"What? I am not! I don't get jealous!" Zexion denied. Demyx laughed to himself and scooted closer to Zexion.
"Well, Mr. I'm not jealous, I think it's cute." Demyx then kissed Zexion's cheek, wrapping one of his arms around the petite man's waist.
"I am not cute Demyx."
"Really? I beg to differ."
"Well then, get on your hands and knees and start begging. I am a man, and men are not cute."
"How about adorable?"
"Even worse."
"You're so stubborn, but I love you anyway." Demyx said as he tried to lean in to kiss Zexion. Before he could, the slate haired man pulled away.
"Wait a minute, what about Haydn?"
"What about him?"
"I thought you two were…you know…"
"Zexy, do you really think I'd leave you for someone else?"
"Well…no, but-
"Exactly. Zexy, Haydn's kind of like an older brother to me like Luxord is. I just like talking to him because we have a lot in common, but none of that could ever amount to what I have with you. You're the most important person in in the world to me. I love you more than I could ever love anyone else. Besides, Haydn's way too old for me. We're like ten years apart!"
Now Zexion couldn't help but laugh at himself. How could he be stupid enough to believe that someone as sweet as Demyx would ever leave him? They both loved each other very much, and nothing could change that.
"Anyway, I'm sorry for not paying any attention to you. I should have realized why you were so upset sooner." Demyx said as he kissed Zexion's lips slowly. When Demyx pulled away, Zexion shook his head.
"No, I should be sorry. I'm just afraid that one day you'll get up and decide you want someone else."
"Zexion, I would never want anyone else. All I've ever wanted is you. Speaking of want…you know what we haven't done in a long time?" Demyx said as he pulled Zexion closer to his body and nipped at his pale, exposed neck. Zexion moaned and tilted his head back to give Demyx better access out of reflex. It felt like it had been so long since he had let Demyx touch him.
"Ngh…Demyx…we can't do this right now. Your injury is still-
"My injury is fine. It's almost completely healed." Demyx muttered between kisses planted on Zexion's jaw line.
"But we're in the middle of the woods. We can't just have sex here." Zexion felt his self-control dwindling away under Demyx's hot kisses.
"Axel and Roxas did it yesterday."
"What?! No they didn't! They went to go get wood for the fire!"
"Well they sure as hell didn't have any with them when they got back."
"Demy, I just don't think we should-
"Zexion, just trust me, okay? I'm fine, I promise. And if anything bad happens, you're free to beat me over the head with one of your giant books as many times as you like."
"Sounds good to me." Zexion said as he smiled into the kiss that Demyx was giving him.
Meanwhile…
Roxas had sent Axel to go check on Demyx and Zexion to make sure that they were safe. He had been gone for a while now. Roxas was starting to get worried when he heard a rustling coming from the bushes. The blonde turned to see Axel appearing.
"Did you find them?"
"Yeah, they're fine." Axel said as he pulled a leaf out of his hair. "They had a little kiss and make up session."
"And now?"
"Demyx is probably pounding Zexion into the ground right about now."
"Axel, why is everything always about sex with you?!" Roxas yelled as he raised his Keyblade in order to throw it at his perverted lover.
"No, don't hit me! I'm being serious!"
"You were watching them do it?!"
"No! They made up and then they started making out! They were half undressed when I left, I swear!"
"…Fine."
"Hehe…they were using the same spot that we used last night." Axel said as he sat down next to Roxas and snaked one of his lanky arms around the smaller boy's waist. There it was. Axel has opened his big mouth yet again and got a hit to the head. Only this time, it wasn't from Haydn's wooden guitar or Zexion's hard covered book, but from Roxas's steel Keyblade.
"Ow! Roxy!"
"Didn't I ask you not to say anything about last night?" Roxas said through gritted teeth.
"Hehe…oops, I must have forgotten."
"Ugh, I'm never sending you two out for wood again." Leon muttered.
"Maybe you're just jealous because I'm getting more in bed than you Squally-chan." Axel said.
"I'm getting plenty in bed, and at least I don't need a bubble butt to get it."
Axel's jaw dropped at the statement as Roxas snorted. He tried his best to make sure that Axel didn't see him laughing, but his attempts were futile.
"Roxas, stop laughing! It's not funny!"
"I'm sorry Axel, but it kind of is."
Axel pouted when Roxas began to laugh harder and turned when he heard a softer laughter coming from the other side of him. It was Haydn, the person behind his oh so true nickname.
"See what you've started." Axel growled.
"Sorry about that buddy." Haydn said as he saw Xemnas out of the corner of his eye. "Excuse me, I've got to go talk to someone else."
Haydn walked towards the place that Xemnas had secluded himself in and sat a few feet away. He had come to learn that Xemnas did not like being very close to anyone. Xemnas was no longer the person he was when Zack was alive, which was no surprise to the brunette, considering all that Xemnas had been through.
"I believe there's a conversation we need to finish up." Haydn said. Xemnas remained silent for a while before speaking.
"What happened…you know…after you left."
"I thought you might ask about that." Haydn said as he put his cigarette out on the rock he was leaning against. "I went straight into the front lines after I left. I hadn't had any sleep or anything to eat all day. I don't know how I managed to survive that first night."
"You must have had a good battle strategy."
"It had nothing to do with battle strategy. I was just lucky. I was such a fool back then; I still am. I've never been all that smart; I've just been lucky my entire life."
"You consider growing up in an orphanage lucky?" Xemnas asked. Haydn's hands clenched into fists, and Xemnas briefly wondered if it was because he had triggered bad memories, or if he had discovered a loop hole in the story of Zack and Haydn's childhood.
"No, I consider myself very lucky to have grown up in that orphanage." Haydn said quietly, without facing Xemnas. "After all, that is where I met Zack."
Xemnas considered this for a moment and decided to leave Haydn alone about the subject, if only for a while.
"…Everyone died." Haydn continued. "There were only fifty of us left on the front lines. Fifty out of two thousand soldiers…all of the people that I was close to died, including my captain."
"Your captain? Then who took over?"
"I did."
"What? But you don't really seem like the kind of person who'd want to-
"I didn't."
"Then why-
"It was my captain's final wish. I was with him on his death bed. He told me that he wanted me to take over his post. I wouldn't have done it if anyone else had asked me."
"You must have hated it."'
"Yeah, I really did. Killing under someone's orders is one thing, but to be the one to actually give out those deadly orders, well, that's different entirely."
"How did the war end? The news reports weren't much help."
"Figures. Our front line forces ended it. I gave the final orders for the final battle, so basically…"
"You ended all of it."
"I still don't know whether to be happy about it or not."
"They never mentioned you in any of the news reports."
"That's because I didn't want to be seen. I had to bargain with a lot of press supervisors to get out of being publicized. I didn't want anyone to know who I was. I've basically been hiding in the shadows for the past five years."
Xemnas gave an understanding nod as Haydn fell silent. He spoke again after a moment.
"I went back there."
"Back where?"
"To Kinosaki."
"You…you did what?"
"I went back there. I had no idea that the whole place had been destroyed along with everyone in it."
"They didn't tell you that sort of thing?"
"No, but it was mostly because we didn't want to know. We were already depressed enough."
"It still seems like they should have said something."
"They usually left smaller town out of the mix. For some reason they seemed to believe that a smaller population meant that the town was far less important than the bigger town and cities that surrounded them."
"Why the hell would they-
"That's just how the government was run back then. You remember, don't you?"
"Yes, unfortunately, I do. What did you find when you went back to Kinosaki?"
"Rubble…and a lot of rotting flesh. None of them were you and Zack though. I took some people that had survived the war with to help me look. We searched for days, and we still came up with nothing. I figured that you two were buried too far under the rubble for me to find you or that you had manage to get away and were hiding somewhere. I looked for both of you. I started asking around and I eventually found out some information about you."
Xemnas became tense. "What kind of information?"
"About your cause and the Organization you were forming at the time. So, is it true that you're a Nobody?"
"Yes, it's true…or, at least it used to be."
Xemnas could tell that Haydn wanted to speak, but was considering something first.
"What do you mean by 'used to be'? I heard that that Sora kid defeated you. If that's so, then how are you alive?"
"Ironically enough, Sora's the one that started bringing members of the Organization back. Roxas is, or was, his Nobody. They were merged together for quite some time before Sora found a way to separate them. Once he did that he had to get Roxas's significant other back, who's friends with Demyx, who's in a relationship with Zexion. How do you know all of these things about Nobodies anyway, Haydn?"
"…I did a lot of research on my own." Haydn said quickly, as if there were more to it than that. "What about Marluxia and Is…I mean, Saix?"
Xemnas could tell that Haydn was trying to change the subject of how he knew all of the things he did. Xemnas was also confuse with Haydn's hesitation in saying Saix's name. It was almost as if he wanted to call the man with the scar across his face by a different name, but Xemnas dismissed it and answered anyway.
"They're friends with the others that used to be Nobodies too."
Haydn cleared his throat uncomfortably. He could tell that Xemnas was starting to suspect something more was going on.
"So how did you do it? You couldn't have always realized that you were a Nobody."
Xemnas's eyes narrowed. He could tell that Haydn was hiding something, he just didn't know exactly what he was hiding…yet.
"It all became clear when they killed Zack. The man who killed him told me what I was."
"He only told you? What made you believe this enemy soldier?"
Once again, Haydn's words had managed to make Xemnas even more suspicious. It was as if Haydn knew that there was more than that to the story. As if he knew the enemy soldier. "No…he…he showed me what I was. I don't know how to explain it. It was like he took all of my forgotten memories in his hand and shoved them back into my head all at once. I don't know how he did it though…"
"I see. What did you do after that?"
"After I got my memories back? I had to spend quite a while gathering my thoughts and piecing all of my forgotten, jumbled memories back to together. After that I went back to the castle in Hollow Bastion where it all started and gathered all of the information I had obtained about the Heartless and Nobodies. Then I started doing more research, weeding out what information I had gathered was useless and what wasn't. Once I had obtained enough information, I started searching for the other five Nobodies who had done research with me when I was a whole being. Once I found them, I started searching for more. I knew that if I wanted to obtain my heart, there would have to be more than six of us."
"And so the reign of darkness and chaos began." Haydn mumbled.
"Haydn, you know something that I don't, don't you?"
"Depends on what that something is. Anything could be something."
"You know something about the Eiji's death, me, those things that killed Zack, everything which is involved with my past! Does one of those sound familiar to you Haydn?! Quit playing games with me and tell me what the hell is going on!"
"… I can't…"
"So you admit that you do know something?!"
"Even if I did, I wouldn't be able to tell you."
"And why not?!"
"Because I made a promise to Zack."
"What?"
"I made a promise to Zack." Haydn repeated. "I promised him that I would never tell you the things you didn't need to know."
'So Zack was lying to me about something! But what did he really know?'
"But why does it matter now?" Xemnas asked. "After all, Zack's dead."
Xemnas knew that he had said something he shouldn't have. Haydn's dark green eyes hardened and nearly turned pitch black.
"How can you say that?" Haydn said, his voice dangerously low. "Especially knowing how much he loved you."
"Maybe he loved me, but I could never have loved him."
"How can you say that after all of the things you two went through together?"
"I can say these things because I was a Nobody, a creature without a heart. Or did you know this long before I did? I can't really tell! I had no heart then, therefore I could not have loved him. Nothing can love without a heart."
"That may be so, but what about now?"
Haydn's words struck Xemnas deep inside. What about now? Now that he had a heart, did that mean he felt all of the feelings he thought he had held for Zack as a teenager? No, that couldn't be it. That wasn't a possibility.
"Having a heart doesn't make a difference now. If I couldn't love him without a heart, there's no way I could love him with one now."
'Are you really that deluded, Xemnas?' Haydn thought. He didn't know whether to be angry with the man in front of him or feel sorry for him.
"Oh, I understand now. I'm sorry you feel that way kid. But even so, it doesn't change my mind. You may not feel as though you ever loved Zack, but that doesn't cancel out my feelings for him. Even though he's gone, he's still my best friend. I don't break promises to the people that I care about, even the dead ones. If you want any information, you'll have to find it yourself." Haydn said as he lit another cigarette, silently signaling that their conversation was over. Xemnas gave an annoyed growl as he stood up.
"Fine, have it your way."
Xemnas walked away, unaware that he had passed someone else who seemed to be eaves dropping.
"Are you all right?" Sephiroth asked as he emerged from the shadows. Xemnas jumped at the voice. How had he miss the glint of silver hair and piercing green eyes lurking in the shadows? Was he really that distracted?
"I'm fine. Disregard anything you may have heard, Sephiroth." Xemnas replied coldly as he disappeared into the cave. Sephiroth's eyes looked after Xemnas for a long while, but averted his gaze when he realized that Xemnas wasn't coming back out. Instead he gazed at Haydn from a distance, noticing the sad, broken look in his deep green eyes. This made Sephiroth wonder what Haydn was hiding as he drifted into the cave as well.
Everyone had been walking for quite a while. The entire group was starting to become irritable. What had started off as a chilly early morning had turned into a sweltering hot afternoon. They had been traveling on the same desert-like cliffs for the past seven hours.
"Man, why did we have to get up so early? I'm beat." Demyx said with a yawn.
"Well, the rest of us went to bed relatively early. You and Zexion were a little busy last night, I assume?" Axel said. Demyx and Zexion blushed furiously. There was no way the redness in their faces could have been a bad case of sunburn.
"Shut up bubble butt!" Demyx yelled. Axel's smirk turned into a silent glare.
"Why couldn't we have just stayed in our safe spot?" Yuffie whined. She wasn't used to traveling in the kind of heat they were in right now.
"If we want to find out what's going on, we have to keep moving Yuffie." Leon said. "They're never going to come to us if we stay in hiding. You shouldn't have followed us if you can't handle it."
Yuffie stuck her tongue out at Leon, but said no more. They traveled a little while longer. They noticed that the number of cliffs were becoming scarcer and scarcer as they advanced forward. It was odd to those who had lived in Radiant Garden for most of their lives. None of them realized that the cliffs stopped here. They didn't understand why this occurrence was happening at first, but it became clear as they stepped foot into an endless pile of rubble.
"W-What is this?" Demyx stuttered uncomfortably. It looked as though something horrible must have occurred on the ground beneath their feet.
"It must be one of the towns that was obliterated during the war." Haydn said stiffly. Xemnas knew he was hiding something. As the silver haired man looked around, he realized that there was a familiarity about the place. He had been there before, but he didn't know why or when he had been there. The dry air that brushed against Xemnas's face smelled of a scent he had known before. There was also another scent that lingered after each gust of wind. It smelled of death and destruction…and of home.
"This is Rokugo." Xemnas stated callously.
"Very good, kid." Haydn said. Everyone was shocked. This used to be the place that Xemnas lived? The town was completely wiped out. Why would someone cause this much damage?
Xemnas looked at his surroundings. He wasn't surprised that the town was no longer existing. Its inhabitants had either fled or had been killed when the town was attacked five years ago. Everything was gone, except for the pain, even though Xemnas wouldn't let himself believe that the pain had ever existed. After all, he was a Nobody back then, a creature without the pulse of life, without a beating heart. Such a beastly creature would never be able to feel things such as pain, suffering, and love.
Xemnas continued to walk with the others. Although he was in their vicinity, it was as if he wasn't really with them at all, at least not mentally and emotionally. Xemnas had turned into a walking corpse as he looked at the place he used to call home with dull eyes. It was like his emotions were being swept away with the mournful ashes. Sephiroth took careful notice to the other silver haired man. He knew the others had probably noticed too, but none of them dared to ask. This didn't make Sephiroth hesitate though, because he wasn't everyone else.
"Are you okay with being here?" Sephiroth muttered. As far as he could tell, Xemnas was the only one who had heard him.
"I'm perfectly fine." Xemnas said, managing to keep his voice even, although Sephiroth could visibly see the man next to him shaking. Xemnas's face was turned away from him. Sephiroth assumed that this was for the best. He didn't think he could handle the look those amber eyes were probably holding. Sephiroth knew by now that if someone could deceive another with their voice, they most likely couldn't do the same with their eyes.
"Why would this place matter to me anyway? I could never truly feel anything back then."
'Do you really believe that, Xemnas?' Sephiroth thought as he lifted an eyebrow at the other man. Xemnas quickened his pace as if he were remembering things that he wished he would never have to think about again.
"Funny, I still remember where everything is, or, where everything used to be." Xemnas said quietly with a bitter undertone.
"How?" Sephiroth asked. "There's nothing here anymore."
"There's nothing here for you, Sephiroth." Xemnas said. Sephiroth felt a pang of guilt in his chest. "I may not have had the equipment required to feel the emotions that surround this place, but I'm forced to remember the illusion of those feelings every day of my life."
Sephiroth nodded silently, even though he didn't agree with the other silver haired man. He didn't feel the need to start an argument with Xemnas, especially at the place like this.
"That's where the hospital used to be." Xemnas said as he pointed over to a random pile of rubble. Sephiroth wasn't sure how Xemnas could possibly tell the difference between one pile of rubble from another, but, he could tell that Xemnas knew what he was talking about. "And that was where Kochi University used to be."
Everyone kept walking along, Xemnas mumbling something about where a certain building used to stand every once in a while. Sephiroth was the only one who could hear Xemnas, but the taller stoic man knew that Xemnas's words weren't meant for him; they were only for himself. His memories were the only reassurance he could find, considering he hadn't let anyone close enough to him in five years to comfort him. Sephiroth continued to walk, lulled by Xemnas's muttered voice. He didn't even realize that Xemnas had stopped walking until he ran into him. Sephiroth grunted at the impact and looked at Xemnas. His amber eyes were completely transfixed on one spot in front of him.
"What's wrong?" Sephiroth asked.
"There used to be an apartment complex right there. That was the first place Zack and I lived together. Although, I'm sure you already know which apartment I'm talking about after you and the others decided to stick your noses in my past." Xemnas said snidely.
"Xemnas…"
"Just save it Sephiroth, I don't want to hear it right now."
Before Sephiroth could say anything else, another voice cut in.
"Hey, are you guys okay back there?!" Cloud shouted. Sephiroth and Xemnas hadn't even noticed that the others were several feet ahead of them. They had been walking behind everyone else the whole time.
"Come on, we better catch up to them before they start complaining." Xemnas said as he started walking away quickly.
'Or think that there's something going on between us.' Sephiroth thought as he followed.
The rubble was starting to lessen, which everyone was thankful for. It wasn't easy walking through a destroyed town. It was almost impossible to get around without tripping over something or stepping in an unidentifiable substance. They were now traveling on something that they knew must have been a dirt road at one point. Now it was overgrown with grass, just like the rest of the area. No one noticed that Xemnas was starting to become apprehensive.
'This is the same dirt road I traveled on with one of Zack's friends to get to Kinosaki.' Xemnas thought as his eyes averted from side to side. Soon they were walking into more rubble, although there was less of it, indicating that a much smaller town had once stood there. Xemnas's apprehension grew.
"Xemnas," Haydn said. "are you sure you're okay with this? We can take the longer route around if you want."
Everyone was confused now. No one had realized where they were yet.
"Why wouldn't he be okay with going this way?" Demyx asked himself more than Zexion. The slate haired man thought for a moment when a sudden realization dawned on him.
"Demyx, where did Xemnas and Zack live after they evacuated Rokugo?" Zexion asked. Demyx had to think for a minute.
"They lived in Kinosaki, which was in the outskirts of Rokugo…" Demyx said the last part of his sentence slowly, his eyes widening as he came to the same realization that Zexion had. A few of the others heard him, and the ones that didn't caught on shortly after. All everyone could do was stare at Xemnas in disbelief.
'Oh gods, too many eyes.' Xemnas thought as he began to panic. He hated it when people pitied him.
"I'm fine. Just keep moving." Xemnas said, speaking with a caution that wouldn't allow his voice to waver. One look at Xemnas's hardened eyes told the others that they should listen to him. They hesitantly turned around and continued to walk as Xemnas let out a sigh of relief. At least he still had control over something.
Everyone was bothered by Xemnas's attempts to cover his own discomfort, but Sephiroth seemed to be the only one thinking very hard about it.
'How can he act like everything's okay?' Sephiroth asked himself.
'The same way you can.' Sephiroth's inner voice answered.
'Shut up, I didn't ask for your opinion.'
'You can't shut me up. I'm you, remember? My opinion is your opinion.'
'Whatever. Just keep your mouth shut, I'm trying to think.'
'Is it really that hard for you to figure things out? I didn't realize you were that stupid.'
'I thought you just said that we were the same person. If that's the case, then you're stupid too.'
'Hehe, now you're starting to catch on.'
'I thought I just told you to shut up you insufferable-
Sephiroth's inner ranting was stopped when he heard a broken, strangled cry emit at his side. Sephiroth turned to see that Xemnas's eyes were looking at his feet in pure horror. The man looked as if he were about to be sick. Sephiroth's assumptions were correct, because Xemnas ran a little ways off and landed on his hands and knees, breathing heavily.
Sephiroth was confused by this point, but also worried, even if he wasn't fully aware of it. His eyes widened as he looked down at his feet. It became very clear why Xemnas was so frightened. Sephiroth had been so absorbed in his inner conflict that he hadn't heard the light crunching noise coming from underneath his foot. When he looked, he saw bones that resembled those of a crushed human hand. A few inches away, the silver haired man saw a small item glinting in the sun. Becoming curious, he decided to pick it up. He realized that the small object was a silver ring with two amber colored gems. They matched Xemnas's eyes perfectly.
'I've seen this ring before.' Sephiroth thought as he examined the ring carefully. He thought for a moment, and suddenly everything became clear. Sephiroth let the ring drop to the ground as he stepped away from the now crushed hand in a disgruntled, horrified manner. That ring belonged to Zack…meaning that the bones must have belonged to him too…
A wave of nausea overcame Sephiroth, but he didn't have time to think about the sick feeling in his stomach before he heard a horrible retching noise from a few feet away. Sephiroth turned to see that Xemnas was about to throw up.
"Xemnas!" Sephiroth said as he ran over to the other silver haired man and kneeled beside him, pulling Xemnas's long hair out of his face without a second thought. He stayed by Xemnas's side and whispered soothing words in his ear as he emptied his stomach. His words didn't seem to be doing much good though; Xemnas was in a panicked state. He could barely breath, and Sephiroth swore he could feel Xemnas's heartbeat coursing throughout his entire body, however ridiculous that seemed. After a while Xemnas stopped puking and pushed himself away from Sephiroth, trying to steady himself enough to stand up. Sephiroth reached out to Xemnas in concern, only to have his arm shoved away roughly.
"No! Just stay away from me." Xemnas said as he ran off. He didn't care where he was running to; he just wanted to get away from Zack's remains.
"Wait, Xemnas! Where do you think you're-
"Just let him go." Haydn said quietly. "I have a feeling it wont be hard to find him."
Sephiroth would have questioned Haydn, but the dead look in those deep green eyes and the tenseness of the other man's usually carefree state told Sephiroth that he shouldn't.
"I need one of you to do me a favor." Haydn said after a few moments. "I need one of you to pick up Zack's remains. I just can't do it." Haydn said weakly. His whole body was shaking. Everyone looked at one another, wondering who would have the nerve to pick up the remains.
"I'll do it." Sephiroth said as he boldly stepped towards the bones. He could now see that there was not only a hand, but various other bones, including a human skull. "I was the one who made Xemnas realize they were here to begin with."
"Thank you." Haydn whispered as he watched Sephiroth cautiously pick up the bones in an extra bag that he had with him. Haydn nodded before lighting a cigarette and walking off to collect himself.
Xemnas wouldn't stop running. He hadn't run this much in his life, even when he had had to run from those enemy soldiers after Zack was killed. His heart was pounding so fast and so hard that he was starting to get scared. Living without a heart for so long had allowed him to exist without knowing how intense its pulse could be. Xemnas stopped running. His heart was pounding so hard in his chest that he was finding it impossible to breath. Once he had regained his ability to breathe properly, he started to get an eerie feeling. He had felt it before and he knew that this feeling could only be associated with this place. (Even if that "feeling" had been more of a phantom when he had actually lived in Kinosaki.) Xemnas slowly turned around, feeling as though he were being watched by an evil presence. His insides filled with overwhelming sorrow and dread when he realized a certain tree was right behind him. It was the same one that Zack had promised to cut down on the day he had died, the tree that always--and still--made Xemnas feel uncomfortable. He felt like crying, but he knew better than to do that after the embarrassing episode he had just had.
Xemnas could only stare up at the big, old oak tree for some time. It was odd that no other trees were still standing, but this one was. Although Xemnas should have examined this more closely, another thought crossed his mind that struck him. In the next second, Xemnas found himself wildly digging through rubble in the spot he guessed had once been his living room. He paid no attention to the pain of the cuts he was getting from digging through glass and other sharp objects. He needed to find it. What he was looking for had to be there!
Xemnas soon hit soft, wet soil and started digging through it, making a mental note to himself that the cuts on his hands would probably get seriously infected later. Finally, he felt something that he knew wasn't soil. He brushed some of the surrounding soil away, finally finding the wooden trap door he had been looking for.
Xemnas slowly lifted the trap door in apprehension. When he opened it, he found that the contents inside were exactly the way they had been five years ago. They had been completely untouched by time. He saw several photo albums, and underneath them, many of Zack's journals. Maybe he would finally learn of the well kept secrets that had been hidden from him for so long.
Author's Note: DON DON DON!! Lol. Another chapter completed. What will Xemmy find when he reads those journals?! Well, you'll just have to wait for the next chapter to find out!! XD. I'm horribly mean. But even so, please review!! You'll get the next chapter faster that way!! I also have some new one-shots up if you guys are interested in reading those. I would love your feedback on those as well.)