Thank you for continuing to read my story. And thank you for all the reviews. :) I still appreciate them all tremendously. I know the story is kind of wrapping up now, but if you're still reading, I'd still love to hear from you... So keep reviewing if you'd like. I know I'd like you to...
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Chapter14
Doug and Tommy McQuaid sat quietly on a couch in a very unfamiliar apartment. It was Captain Fuller's place. The boys had been taken to the hospital as soon as they were out of their house. There, it was confirmed that Tommy's arm was indeed broken. He had gotten his arm put in a cast and sling, and Doug, fortunately, had no broken bones - only bruises and pain.
At the hospital, a doctor or cop (Doug wasn't sure which) had insisted on taking photos of their injuries as evidence. Doug remembered Tommy had been extremely reluctant to comply. In fact, it had taken a lot of encouragement from both Doug and Judy before he had finally agreed:
...
"It seems like we have a pretty good case against your father," Judy Hoffs had assured them as she stood in the examination room with the brothers and the man with the camera, "but just to make sure we have all our bases covered, I think it would be wise to have photos of your injuries as evidence."
Doug nodded. That seemed reasonable enough. But Tommy didn't look convinced.
"You already have an x-ray of my arm," he insisted, "isn't that enough?"
Judy frowned, "the more evidence, the better," she told him, "he could make up some sort of excuse for a broken arm, but the more injuries we can prove he caused, the more likely we'll win this case. We might not even need the evidence. It all depends on if he'll admit to any of this. But it's always good to have some back up support, just in case."
"Come on, man," Doug squeezed his brother's uninjured arm, "it's not a big deal. Just a couple quick photos of your arms and back. I'll even go first," he offered, pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it onto the examination table.
Doug was led over a bit out of the way and stood still as a man took a photo of his back and then his front, "See?" the man called over to Tommy who was practically hiding behind Judy, "that's all there is to it."
Tommy shook his head, "who's going to see these pictures?" he asked.
"No one but a judge and jury, prosecution and defense lawyers... and that is assuming that there's even a trial. It all depends on how far this case goes. If your father admits he did it, it's possible no one will ever need to see them. And even if he doesn't admit it, there's probably not going to be a full blown trial. These cases usually aren't too complicated if we have a lot of evidence, which we will if you let me document it. Don't worry. No one is going to make fun of you or think badly of you," he assured the younger boy, "they are just to be used as evidence and nothing more."
"It's quick and painless," Judy assured him.
Tommy's eyes were wide. He hesitated, "but not all the bruises are from him," he stammered, "Doug and I got into a fight with some homeless guy a couple nights ago..."
"We can make a note of which injuries are from him," the man with the camera offered.
"Come on, Tommy," Doug reassured him, putting his hand on Tommy's head, "there's nothing to be embarrassed about," Doug kept his own shirt off so that maybe Tommy would feel better about taking his off in front of Judy and the photographer. Doug doubted the boy's hesitance had anything to do with him feeling ashamed of anyone seeing his bare chest. He probably just didn't want anyone to see how hurt he was, even if they did already know. Tommy was always shy about showing off his injuries. He didn't want people thinking he was weak or defenseless.
"Fine," Tommy sighed. He nervously shrugged out of the sling, pulled off the hospital gown he was wearing and averted his eyes from everyone in the room. The doctors had given him scrubs pants as well, so keeping them on made taking off the gown no big deal. Doug thought so anyway.
Doug looked down and saw that Judy was squeezing his brother's hand in her own. Tommy didn't even try to pull his hand away from hers. Doug wondered which one of them had initiated that. Did Judy grab onto him to comfort him? Or had he snatched up her hand on his own? It sort of made Doug feel bad for not being the one in Judy's place... But he wasn't about to go over and push her out of the way.
The photographer took photos of Tommy's chest and back, and then a separate closer photo of his neck, which had bruises on it from their father's hand.
"Alright," the man squeezed Tommy's shoulder reassuringly, "all done."
Tommy pulled the hospital gown and sling back on and sat back down on the examination table behind Judy.
"I'll let you two stay in here for a little bit if you want," the doctor offered, "you're free to go whenever you're ready," with that, the doctor and photographer left so that the brothers and Judy were the only people left in the room.
"I'm sure the doctor already asked you this," Judy looked from Tommy to Doug, "but I'm going to say it again just in case."
Doug narrowed his eyes, waiting for her to continue. He looked over at Tommy who was just staring tiredly at the floor.
"Did your father ever do anything else... well..." she paused, "did he ever do anything sexual to either of you?" Judy asked, holding her breath as she waited for their answer.
Doug shook his head, "No," he insisted, feeling shocked that she would even ask. For a moment he felt worried. What if his father had done something like that to Tommy? But then he shook his head. He wouldn't have had time to. Doug was always with Tommy. And even if he had found the time, Tommy would have told Doug about it. They told each other everything. Plus, his father wasn't like that. He seemed to like hurting them, but not like that.
"Tommy?" Judy asked.
Tommy looked up at her, "what?" he looked lost. He hadn't been listening.
She sighed, "has your father ever touched you inappropriately? I mean... has he ever hurt you in a sexual way?" she seemed like she didn't like asking even once, and was even more hesitant to ask a second time.
Tommy shook his head, "no." he answered simply. Doug was glad to hear no fear in his voice. He hadn't hesitated and didn't sound like he was in denial or anything. His answer sounded even more truthful than Doug's had.
Fortunately, Judy had let that subject drop when she felt convinced the brothers weren't lying, "I'll leave you alone so you can get dressed," she looked at Tommy and then back at Doug, "whenever you're ready, I'll be right outside the door."
As soon as Judy left the room, Tommy started taking the hospital gown off again. Doug watched him. His chest and back were pretty bruised up, but not as bad as Doug's. But it was still enough to make Doug feel guilty. Most of Tommy's cuts and bruises weren't created tonight. His only new injuries that were significant were his broken arm and his bruised neck. Doug wished he could have protected his brother tonight.
"Can you help me?" Doug was pulled out of his thoughts at the sound of his brother's voice. He was having trouble pulling his t-shirt over the cast on his arm.
Doug walked over to him and un-snagged the shirt from the edge of the cast. He then helped the boy get the sling back over his shoulder.
"Thanks," Tommy mumbled.
"Tommy," Doug frowned as he looked down at his brother. He hadn't ever thought about this until Judy had mentioned it tonight, but their father really could have done so much worse to them. If the man had wanted to, he could have done almost anything to Tommy and Doug. Doug felt pretty sure he himself would have been able to fight back and avoid something like that... But would Tommy have been able to? The more he thought about it, the more nervous he felt. The other morning, when he found his father hitting Tommy in the basement, the boy had been crying and was only dressed in boxers. His arms had been restrained, so he couldn't have fought back... And he couldn't say how long the two were down there... Doug really didn't think their father would ever want to do something sexual to them, but what if he had, to Tommy?
"Doug... What?" he heard Tommy's voice, "are you spaced out?"
Doug blinked, shook his head, and laughed very slightly, "I guess I must have been," he admitted. He had said his brother's name and then had gotten lost in his thoughts before he listened for Tommy's response, "um... I wanted to ask you something," Doug frowned.
"Go ahead," Tommy looked up at him and waited.
Doug cleared his throat, "you know how Judy was, um... talking about... well... you know..."
Tommy furrowed his brows, "what?" he asked, sitting down on the table next to Doug, pulling his legs up and turning to face his brother.
"Well... when she asked if Dad ever did anything... um... sexual to us," Doug nervously explained.
Tommy's eyes widened, "yeah," he said in a small voice, "what about it?"
"Well," Doug breathed out nervously, "you would tell me if he did something like that to you, right?"
Tommy shrugged his shoulders, "he didn't. Why? He didn't do anything like that to you, did he?" Tommy's eyes were still wide and he looked quite scared.
Doug shook his head, "no... I just was worried that he might have to you."
Tommy shook his head as well, "no. He didn't. I swear."
"But you'd tell me if he did, right?" Doug wondered. He hoped his brother was telling the truth.
"Honestly?" Tommy's eyebrows rose, "I don't know if I would. It's never happened to me... I couldn't say for sure if I'd tell you or not. How could I know how I'd handle something like that?"
"I think I'd tell you," Doug pouted.
Tommy frowned, "he didn't do that to you though, right?" he asked again. He reached over and put his hand on Doug's arm, "you're acting really weird."
"No," Doug insisted, "I just never even thought it was a possibility. It was never something I considered could happen... I was scared that he might have done something to you while I wasn't there. Over all the years, I was always looking out for signs that he was in a bad mood. I'd listen closely at night so I'd hear if he was throwing things around. I was always trying to protect you from him, but I never even looked out for that."
"I can only promise you he never did anything like that to me," Tommy assured him, "I don't think he'd do that. He punished us for doing things he thought were wrong. I think he was trying to fix us, not just torture us for fun. He wanted to change us into better people. He wasn't very good at it, but I don't think he usually did it just to be cruel."
Doug sighed, "yeah... I guess so," he breathed a sigh of relief and pulled Tommy into an embrace, "you ready to go then?" he asked.
Tommy nodded.
They walked out of the room and met back up with Judy. She had then taken them back out into the waiting room where Captain Fuller had been waiting. Instead of taking them somewhere scary and uninviting, he had invited them into his own home, for which Doug was very grateful.
...
Doug wasn't sure what was going to happen next, and it terrified him. He looked over at Fuller, who was sitting in a nearby chair, "I don't really have much extra space," he apologized, "if you want, you two can share the bed, and I'll take the couch. Or someone could try to sleep on the chair. It reclines. If you don't want to share the bed, one of you can take the couch and the other can have the bed, or the chair... Whatever you feel comfortable with."
He looked over at Tommy waiting for his brother's input, "Let's stay in here," Tommy said quietly so that only Doug could hear him, "both of us."
"We'll stay in here," Doug told Fuller, "thanks."
"What's going to happen now?" Tommy asked in a strained voice. He looked so tired, so drained.
Fuller looked back at him, "we're going to try to find you someplace to live. I promised you that I'd make sure you find someplace safe, and until we find a place you are comfortable with, you're welcome to stay here."
"Really?" Doug asked, "that's pretty generous. What if we mess stuff up? Maybe living with us would be hell for you..."
Fuller laughed, "we'll deal with that if we come to it. For now, I have no problem with you boys staying here. You've been through a lot and deserve somewhere safe and comfortable to stay. My apartment may not seem like much, but it should be sufficient for the time being."
"Thanks," Doug muttered. He didn't really like charity to be directed at him, but he didn't want to let his own pride get in the way of his brother's safety. Tommy needed someone to take care of him, and Doug wondered if he would be enough for his little brother right now. Sleeping under a bridge didn't seem sufficient for him tonight.
"You have nothing to be ashamed of," Fuller spoke up. He must have sensed that Doug felt bad, "you were in a very serious, very awful situation. It's not always easy to know what to do when you're in a situation like that."
Doug frowned, looking over at Tommy who was snuggling down into the couch. He looked exhausted. Seeing his little brother looking so beaten down and tired made Doug feel even worse. He had a duty to protect the younger boy. He had been doing it for years. Ever since shortly after their mother died, Doug had tried his best to look after the little boy. But his best often wasn't good enough.
"I hope you're not mad at me," Tommy mumbled, half asleep.
Doug stared at him, "what?"
"For calling the police. I know we said we never would. I was just so scared for you. He was hurting you, and I didn't know what else to do. I couldn't help you any other way," Tommy had his eyes closed tightly as if he was thinking back. He had his legs pulled up on the couch so that he was curled into a small heap of his torso and limbs. He looked entirely fragile and tiny.
"You did the right thing," Fuller called over to him, "I'm sure you were terrified to call us, but you did anyway. It took a lot of bravery to do that."
Doug nodded, even though his brother couldn't see, "You made the right call, Tommy," he rephrased what Fuller had just said.
"I hope so," Tommy looked more relaxed now. Doug could tell his brother was falling asleep.
"Are you guys ready to go to bed? I could leave you alone if you want," Fuller offered, "feel free to help yourself to anything in the kitchen - anything that doesn't require cooking," he added, "I don't know how good you guys are with a stove... I don't want anyone cooking anything in the middle of the night."
"You don't have to leave yet," Doug said before he could even think. He didn't really feel like he could sleep right now. His brother was having no problem doing so, but Doug still felt too anxious, "could you stay up and talk to me for a little bit?" he asked.
"Sure," Fuller looked confused, but remained seated.
"I wanted to call the cops sooner," Doug frowned, "but Tommy convinced me not to. See, earlier this week, Tommy sold some of my dad's cigarettes," he started to explain, wondering why he was telling the man about this at all, "he did it at school, in front of a teacher, so the people in the office called our dad. Tommy knew dad would be furious. He didn't want to go home, and I sure as hell didn't want him to go home either... so we stayed out all night. We slept under a bridge. But we couldn't stay gone forever. We had to go home eventually."
Fuller kept silent, listening to him intently.
"We snuck in late so that maybe we could sleep there and then sneak out before he even knew we had come home at all," Doug explained, "but he found Tommy and wanted to punish him. You saw the chains up in the basement, right?"
"Yeah," Fuller nodded, looking hesitant. Maybe he didn't want to hear this. He was going to anyway though... Doug had started telling the story. He might as well finish. It wasn't often that he got the opportunity to talk to anyone about these things.
"Well, I woke up and heard their voices down in the basement. He had Tommy chained up and was hitting him with his belt," Doug frowned. He could feel tears in his eyes as he remembered this, "Tommy was only wearing boxers. His back was completely exposed. I think Dad hit him ten or eleven times, and some of them were bleeding. Tommy was actually crying when I found him. He doesn't normally do that. I got myself involved then... Dad hit me with the belt too, but not as many times, and I had on a shirt... I wanted to call the police or tell someone after that. I couldn't stand to see Tommy get hurt any more... But he didn't want me to say anything. It was because I had him convinced that we'd move out together as soon as I turned eighteen... And that's what my plan was... But I was stupid. I shouldn't have thought we could last another year. I should have said something sooner. We've been putting up with this since we were little kids. I should have put a stop to it years ago. It was my job to protect him, and I was too stupid to know how to do it."
"You were a child, Doug," Fuller looked at him with a hard stare, "you still are. You're not supposed to have to make decisions like that. You tried your best. How could you have known what was the right thing to do?"
He shrugged, "I don't know..." Doug frowned, "I just feel stupid for waiting this long. I could have gotten him out of there when he was five. That's when Dad hit him the first time. If I had told a teacher or something back then, we would have been out of there. But I let him stay ten more years. I let him suffer ten years longer than he had to."
"And how old were you when he was five?" Fuller asked.
"Seven," Doug responded, slumping his shoulders and looking down.
"Would you expect a seven year old to know what to do when he and his brother are being beaten by their father? Think about it. Pictures some random seven year old kid. Would you think he was an idiot for keeping that a secret?" Doug looked back up at the cop. Fuller looked angry as he continued, "you can't be upset with yourself for being a scared little boy. Even at the age you have reached now, you couldn't have known what was the right move to make. No one should have to decide what to do about being hurt every day at home. Home is a place you're supposed to feel safe. When you don't feel safe there anymore, it's hard to say what you should do."
Doug sighed, "I guess so," he looked over at Tommy as his little brother sunk down into the couch further, "I just can't believe it was Tommy who finally stepped up to the plate and did something. There were so many times I wanted to save him from this, but I never did. It was him who finally saved me."
"And you should be proud of him," Fuller informed him, "but you shouldn't be ashamed of yourself. I'm sure you've protected him lots of times, in whatever ways you could think of."
Doug nodded, "yeah. I always tried to make sure Dad didn't hurt him. It just didn't usually do any good..."
"It's in the past," Fuller looked at him, "you did what you could. He's probably more grateful to you than you could ever know."
Doug looked back over at Tommy, who was lying down even more now, taking up half the couch. He hoped his little brother didn't feel too let down by him.
"I'll get you some pillows and blankets," Fuller stood up and left the room, returning a few moments later with the items he'd promised.
"Thanks," Doug smiled as he took them.
"You tired yet?" Fuller asked, "I'll stay up as late as you do. It's no problem. I don't want to keep you up if you're tired though."
Doug shook his head, "you can go to bed. I'll never fall asleep if I stay up talking anyway. I'll try to go to bed. Don't know if I'll be successful, but I'll try at least..."
Fuller put his hand on Doug's shoulder and squeezed lightly, "you're both good kids," he assured him, "you handled this situation better than some. Everything's going to be okay for both of you. I'll personally make sure of it."
"Thanks," Doug smiled up at him. He really was a nice guy. Most cops he'd dealt with seemed to hate him. Fuller was actually giving him a second chance. He saw the brothers as boys who got screwed over in life and not just as screw ups who should be thrown in jail and forgotten. He wanted to help them turn things around in their lives, "we both really appreciate you helping us out," Doug told him, "Tommy might not act grateful, but he is. He's pretty defensive, but it's usually just because he's scared to let his guard down."
Fuller nodded, "I know," he smiled, "I'll see you two tomorrow morning. Try to get some sleep. He turned and walked toward his bedroom.
"Good night," Doug called after him.
"Good night, Doug," Fuller called back, walking into his bedroom and closing the door.
Doug sighed and looked over at his brother yet again. He looked so comfortable. Doug took one of the blankets and draped it over his brother's frame. He then took a pillow and walked over to Tommy's head, lifting him up slowly and very carefully so as to not wake him. He slipped the pillow under his brother's head and then stepped back. The boy was still asleep. Doug smiled.
He didn't go to the chair as Fuller had suggested. Instead he sat down next to his brother, putting the second pillow over his brother's legs and laying his head down on it lightly. He reached up and found his brother's uninjured arm, grabbing onto his smaller hand with his own larger one. He felt Tommy's fingers tightening around his.
Doug was taller than his little brother and therefore couldn't curl up into as tiny of a ball as he could. In fact, Doug's legs were draped over the armrest of the couch. He didn't mind though. He felt content being so near his Tommy.
The younger boy shifted a bit under him, making a small sleepy noise. Doug looked at him. He still appeared to be asleep. Doug hoped his dreams were pleasant. He wasn't smiling or frowning. Maybe he wasn't dreaming about anything at the moment.
For the first time in a long time... Maybe since before he could remember, Doug actually felt safe, and he actually felt he didn't have to worry about anyone hurting his brother. Fuller wouldn't do anything bad to them. Doug was fairly certain of that. They were sleeping in a building where no one was a threat, not under the bridge with a homeless thief. Not among drug dealers and drunks. Not under the same roof as a man who seemed to delight in hurting them for terrible reasons, if he even had any reasons at all. Doug could sleep soundly, knowing no one was going to wake him up by slapping him - knowing he wouldn't awake to the sound of things being slammed around or to his brother's defiant arguing with their father.
They still had a long road ahead of them, and it might not be easy. Finding a place to live wasn't something he had thought he'd be doing so soon. They might have to live with people they hadn't met yet. Things would be weird for a while, but they still had each other, and they always would. Everything was going to be alright.
He squeezed Tommy's hand lightly, "I'm proud of you, little brother," he whispered.
"I'm," he heard Tommy's small, voice. He paused for a second, "proud of you," he paused again, "Doug," he was talking in his sleep, "love you," he mumbled.
Doug smiled, "I love you too, Tommy."
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This was originally the final chapter, and I still feel it works well as a final chapter. I did, however, write an additional two chapters which will be published shortly. You might feel they aren't necessary... Maybe they are just a bit extra... I like them. Maybe you will too.