Author's Note: Here we go, chapter 14 already! Part of the chapter will engage that Mature rating, soooo that's that.

Chapter 14: Under Pressure

When I entered my room after going to Grillby's with Sans earlier, I half-expected him to still be asleep on my bed just as he had the day before. Was that only yesterday? Between my soft reset and reliving Chara's entire life inside my head, making the decision with Sans to try to retrieve his memories seemed like a lifetime ago.

I walked past my desk, dresser, closet, and bookshelf, still shaking slightly from admitting my worries to Sans regarding my magick. When I reached my bed, I hesitated before sitting down on its edge. I placed my hand in the middle on the ruffled blankets.

I wonder what Sans must think of me right now. It's difficult to wrap my mind around what it is like to lose one's memories yet still be in the same situation. Sure, I had no memories of my life before falling into the Ruins, but at least that has yet to come back to haunt me. For Sans, his own true memories of us rest back from when I was 14, too old to be a kid yet too young to be an adult in his eyes. Now however, I've grown a lot over the past 5 years. And Sans was there for all of it.

To this Sans now… I'm practically a stranger.

My heart pang in my chest. There was hope though, Sans said it himself. If he could fall in love with me once, who's to say it can't happen again?

Something told me it wouldn't be that easy, part of why Sans and I fell in love was due to having all of those memories we shared. All the long conversations, late-night food runs, cat naps, surprises at work, vacations, reminders to not overwork, our first kiss, first I love yous… First everything.

Nothing could replicate those memories for me.

Sans is still Sans though, and I'm still me, right?

I looked over at a mirror hanging on the wall across from me. After experiencing everything Chara went through I could feel them apart of me now, more than I ever realized. The line defining who I am and who Chara was is beginning to blur. I'm starting to question what memories are mine, what emotions are mine, and even what intentions are mine.

We really aren't too different. Honestly, if our roles were reversed I'd imagine I would make similar choices. I mean, look how far I'm willing to go for Sans… Chara has done everything in their power to save their brother, even resorting to violence. The more I consider the situation… would I kill to protect Sans?

I clenched the blankets on either side of me in my fists. I don't want to be like Chara. I tell myself that I'm not Chara, nor will I ever be. But Chara is literally part of my being. If I rescue Asriel, what will happen to Chara?

If I rescue Asriel… I shake my head, how on earth will I do this?

My mind wandered back to the dream when I defended Sans. Slowly, I released the blankets from my grip and summoned my soul. I cupped my ruby red soul gently in my palms. Even though my soul was a complete summation of my entire being, I couldn't help but think of it as something just as equally separate from me. In a strange way, I saw my soul as sentient. My soul had a personality all to its own and though it was just a true reflection of myself, I didn't recognize it as being me.

The soul bobbed up and down as it hovered in front of my torso. I caressed it with both thumbs, after being injected with concentrated Determination, my soul seemed more confident but I could see it still had bashful tendencies as it flinched whenever the way I touched it changed.

Could I use magick outside of my dreams? Was I really a mage? My throat squeezed, I thought about how this would change things. Could I live with myself knowing that my own magick created the barrier? Would my friends and family still care about me when they make the connection? I was so scared to admit my fears to Sans earlier… The last time I felt that sort of guilt and fear I was just a kid essentially. I shouldn't feel afraid of Sans, I know, but just as I feel like a stranger to him, I'm realizing I still have the same butterflies from when we first started getting close.

As I focused on that flustered emotion in my stomach, I felt a strong vibration coming from my soul. I opened my eyes to find the same gold mist circulating around my soul however it was much, much smaller than in my dreams. Almost immediately after opening my eyes, the mist vanished.

I pouted my lips slightly. I've seen all my friends and family use magick in and out of battle. From the distant memories of fighting Undyne to Toriel using fire magick when she baked. Sans still used his abilities to teleport, levitate objects, and manipulate appendages… I felt the heat rise to my face as thoughts of us making love bubbled in my mind.

The way he used to look at me and use his magick to send stimulating sparks down my spine, he would always make his way down further and further…

"urrrghhh" I groaned internally, flopping my face into my pillow. I shouldn't do this now, at this rate… I'll…I'll…

I allowed my hand to make its way down my pants and lightly rubbed and circled my pink gash between my thighs. My mind wandered to places I hadn't allowed myself to think about ever since Sans lost his memories.

As I played with the area surrounding my clitoris, I imagined the times Sans would pin me to the bed after a long day out with friends and we would finally get to be alone. In the heat of the moment, he would tear off my clothes and excitedly pressed his teeth down my neck. Each skeletal kiss leaving a trail of blue sparking magick before he'd gently bite my skin, creating light indents on the flesh.

My fingers began to tremble as I kneaded my now moist lips. With each bite Sans would leave on my body, I always would let out a moan; when imagining it now, it was no different.

My breathing became heavy and shallow. I envisioned Sans between my legs now with his hot breath on my womanhood, I closed my eyes tightly. Before I knew it, I was shaking the whole bed with my movements but I didn't care. I was past the point of no return. Images of Sans' tongue grazing my crotch blinded me. I could not hold back the moans escaping my lips no further.

I felt a tug on my lips as I brief consideration came to mind that maybe I should've been showing Sans these memories instead. With that notion, I threw my head back with a mixture of pure pleasure and laughter. After being with Sans for so long, it was no surprise I was the sort of girl to giggle when she climaxes.

Letting out a final groan of relief into my pillow, I shakily pushed myself onto my back, releasing my hand from within my pants. I looked down at my hand and saw a faint gold glow at my finger's tips.

"What the…" I could use magick without even realizing it? Pursing my lips, I shook my hand a few times but the golden glow remained.

I sat up, swinging my feet off the edge and furrowed my brow. Why was this energy still here? I proceeded to pinch my fingers together and begin rubbing to no prevail. I looked out into my room and noticed a light from under the door crack. Curious, I stood up and walked over to the door.

As I got closer I could see the light had a familiar blue glow to it… What was Sans doing out there?

I quickly yanked the door wide open and reveal a very flustered and cyan skeleton in the hallway, my sudden surprise had caused him to back quickly into the wall across from my room.

"What are you doing?" I asked, taking in the blue emitting from under his clothes and a look of guilt written blatantly on his face.

"i um was about to knock but…" Sans straightened himself out and traced my body with his gaze, "what's up with your, uh, hand?"

I looked back down at my fingers, still glowing to my slight embarrassment.

I swallowed, trying to figure out what to say. "Honestly… I'm not sure." There, no lies in that statement at least.

Sans raised a questioning eyebrow and a grin slowly grew on his features. "no ideas at all?"

I gave an innocent shrug, hoping I don't look too misshapen after my dirty endeavor. His gaze didn't faze however, a mischievous look in his eye.

"lemme see that kiddo." Sans reached out to my hand and I carefully placed my hand in his. As soon as my hand met his palm, the glow intensified. I felt my heart beat faster in my chest. Such a small gesture from him after what just occurred from within made me feel giddy and guilty at the same time. Sure, Sans always knew which buttons to push to tease me, but for me to get this excited is just embarrassing. He smirked weakly, "just as i thought."

He released my hand and immediately the glow dimmed more than before. "What is it?"

"c'mon, lets talk about this downstairs." Sans pivoted on his heels and began walking down the stairs towards the kitchen table. We sat down across from each other and I gave him a small smile. Why do I feel so awkward around him now?

"so, ki-frisk. what do you know about magick?" Sans leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms loosely.

I shrugged slightly. "Well, nothing more than what you told me before."

"what exactly did i tell you?" Sans asked as his eyes widened.

I smiled, "Just that all the varieties of magick monsters possess is hereditary and that depending on the type of magick determines the difference between boss monsters and regular monsters."

Sans nodded. "yeah that's all true… but do you know how monsters summon this energy?"

I shook my head, so he continued. "it's pretty simple actually, it's all based upon emotions."

"So if you're angry it's more aggressive?" My thoughts flashed back to battles with the boss monsters back in the Underground.

Sans chuckled, "actually a little different approach. how powerful magick can be is based solely off of intention and experience… to actually summon magick, happiness is the key."

"Wait… what?" My eyebrows knotted in confusion. That doesn't make any sense. How could anyone be happy enough to summon magick before a battle, let alone sustain it? "Are you saying that when… we fought… you were happy?" My facial features molded into a deeper state of awkward confusion.

To this Sans at first grimaced at the memory of learning that all his nightmares were true, but after seeing my expression he couldn't stop himself from laughing. "no no, it's not always pure happiness, but usually some form of it. i guess, when i fought you i did it to avenge everyone… think of it being just another feeling like hope or faith."

I slowly nodded my head. "So, like when I fought Toriel, she could summon her magick because she was trying to protect me. Or when Undyne or Asgore fought me, it was because the outcome of my death would be their freedom… And when I fought Chara, I was protecting you."

"you got it bud," Sans smile and winked, "so, what were you thinking about in your room earlier then?"

The way Sans looked at me made me feel like I was back in Snowdin, squirming under his gaze, something I knew from the start he enjoyed making me do. He had put the spotlight back on me, knowingly making the heat rise to my cheeks.

"Nothing!" I answer way too quickly. From the way he smiles, I realize he knows something I don't. But, his face turns a little serious for a moment.

"hey frisk." He leans his crossed arms over the table. I couldn't suppress the flutter in my stomach after hearing him say my name again. Unable to speak right away, I give a short hum in response.

He lets out a breathy laugh and scratches his cheekbone. When he meets my gaze, his pupils shrink and the corners of his mouth drop flat. "ah, actually, nevermind."

"What?" I ask, reaching my arm across the table to grab his forearm. As soon as I do however he pulls away. I retreat my hand away, the glow gone now from my fingers. I see Sans take notice of this but he doesn't say anything.

He pulls out his phone and starts pressing letters into the keypad, "we should let alphys know you've started using magick subconsciously." and then he mumbles "i think it would be better for both of us the sooner you learn to control it."

He stands up and I follow suit, "Both of us?" I ask but he dismisses the question as he presses the phone to his skull and starts talking to Alphys, making his way into the living room.

I stand there alone in the kitchen area, rubbing my hands together. I couldn't let go of Sans changing the subject and then avoiding my questions… Maybe there's just still a lot for me to learn when it comes to this power. After all, magick was supposed to be used for fighting, what if I somehow hurt him?

I closed my hands into fists and listened to Sans' distant murmurings into the phone. Whatever he was hiding, I would get to the bottom of it.

Author's Note: Hopefully this isn't considered a big cliffhanger. There's some timing things I'm working out when it comes to when the two will start to admit things... Please leave feedback!