Chapter 14: Getting Along So Far
Everyone is getting along. Tom is getting along with Vinny, Marie is getting along with Lorraine and Ray and Vinny are just in the same room. "This is nice everyone getting along with each other." Marie said to everyone. "It is nice. Ann how's your dad and everyone?" Vinny asked her. "They're doing fine. My family wishes everyone a Merry Christmas." Ann told them. "Tell him anytime he wants a rematch, I'll be ready to give it to him." Tom told her. "Don't start this again Tom." Kate told him. "Start what?" Tom asked. "The competing with Mr.Murtaugh. We're all friends and Charlie married Ann. That makes us family and families don't compete." Sarah said to Tom. The Barones and Vinny start laughing at what Sarah just said. "It's true families don't compete." Sarah then said again. "Listen, Sarah other families might not compete but, my family is always competing against one another." Vinny told her. "It's true. Robbie competes with Raymond, Ray competes with Vinny and Debra competes with me." Marie told them. "Why would I compete with you?" Debra asked Marie. "We all know you want to be like me. Especially the way I can actually cook." Marie told Debra. "Mom you need to cool it." Ray told her. "Raymond you make fun of her cooking all the time." Marie told him. "I'm only joking." Ray told Debra. "You're not funny Raymond. If you were a comedian they would boo you off the stage before you even walked on." Robert told him. "I'm funnier then you." Ray told him. "Funnier looking maybe." Robert then said. "Robbie you apologize to your brother right now." Marie told him. "Aunt Marie, Ray started the whole thing." Vinny said to her. "You see what they do? They double team me." Ray said to everyone. "Ray you're paranoid." Vinny told him. "Am I? Okay, how about today? When you two kept on throwing snow balls at me." Ray said to them. "They were only snow balls. It's not like when we crazy glued your hand to your desk." Robert said to him laughing. "Laugh it up. I ripped off most of the skin on my hand to get it off my desk." Ray said. "It was awful his hand looked like one of Debra's meatloafs all chalky and dry it was disgusting." Marie said to them.
"I think we should go." Tom said to his family. "And leave me here alone with them?" Lorraine then said. "They have issues they need to work out." Tom said to her. "Come on guys we need judges." Vinny said to the Bakers. "For what?" Jake asked him. "For when Debra and my aunt get into it. We need all the judges we can get." Vinny replied. "I'm not getting into an argument with Marie." Debra said to Vinny. "Is it because you never win dear?" Marie then asked Debra. "Marie arguing with you is like arguing with a brickwall." Debra told her. "May I just ask, what the hell is that suppose to mean?" Marie then asked Debra. "It means that your face looks like a brickwall." Frank then replied. "Don't get me started on you Frank!" Marie yelled. "Me? What's so bad about me?" Frank asked her. "This is going to be good." Vinny said to Lorraine quietly. "What's so bad about you? I'll tell you what's so bad about you. You are a pig with shoes! You don't help around the house! I cook, I clean and what do I get? Nothing. Not even a 'Thank you'!" Marie then yelled. "Do you ever thank me for anything? No! All you do is nag! I'm tired of it!" Frank then yelled.
"I think we should go now." Tom said to Kate. "Bye everyone we'll see you tomorrow." Kate said as the Bakersleft. "Should we stop your aunt and uncle?" Lorraine asked Vinny. "No. Let them go a few more rounds then they'll tire themselves out and we can actually have a nice conversation with everyone else." Vinny said to Lorraine. "It looks like they have two or three more rounds in them." Robert then said to Vinny. "I bet mom wins." Ray then said to them. "I bet Uncle Frank wins." Vinny said to Ray. "How much are we betting?" Robert then asked them. "Ten bucks." Ray said to him. "Ten bucks? My money is on Frank." Debra then said. "I also bet that mom will win." Robert said putting ten bucks on the table. "You guys bet on who will win an argument between your aunt and uncle?" Lorraine asked Vinny. "Yeah. It's more fun then betting on who wins an argument between Ray and Debra." Robert then said to her. "Why?" Lorraine asked. "I always win the argument." Debra then said to Lorraine. "You don't always win." Ray then said to Debra. "I win 90 percent of the arguments." Debra then told Ray. "That isn't always winning." Ray said to her. "Fine, I win arguments 90 percent of the time." Debra then said. "Thank you." Ray then said to her.
Marie and Frank are still arguing after two hours. "You want to call it a draw?" Vinny asked everyone that put money in. "Okay." Everyone said as they got their money from the table. "Where are you going?" Lorraine asked Vinny. "I'm going to bed. This argument can last all night." Vinny said to her. "I'm not staying down here with them by myself." Lorraine then said to him. "Then go to bed like the rest of us." Vinny then told her. "Will they be okay?" Lorraine asked Vinny. "They'll be fine. They'll forget about the whole argument by tomorrow." Vinny told her. "Oh that's so sweet. They're going to make up." Lorraine then said. "No. At their age they're lucky they can even remember who they are." Vinny said to her as they went to bed.