A/N Alright. I'm sorry for any disorientation which this may cause, but this is the first rewritten chapter of Don't Stand. The deleted chapters have been posted as an outtake here on fan fiction, and I have begun posting new chapters. There was a warning this morning, and the response I have had was very positive, so rather than wait until I return from vacation I am posting the first rewritten chapter now.

The reason for my doing this is that due to some paths I chose to take with the narrative the story changed quite drastically from my original intent.

I would rather delete and rewrite than become unenthused about the story and leave it unfinished. Hopefully you will agree that this is the best course of action.

I am rewriting from Chapter 14 on, and bringing the story back to how I had originally envisioned it. Most of the events in the story are the same, but there are some key differences you may notice if you have been reading all along. If you wish to compare what I originally posted to the rewritten chapters, you will find the deleted chapters posted as an outtake under my stories here on fan fiction.

I realize this problem is due to my inexperience as a fiction writer. The fascinating thing about putting stories on ff is that writers are able to get feedback as we go, and you as readers are privy to the development of a story, sometimes from its embryonic stages. So far everyone who has reviewed, PMed or written on the forum thread on Twilighted has shown nothing but support for my decision.

Thanks as always to MrsDazzled and IrritableGrizzzly, who beta for me and give me more support than I deserve. Check out IG's story Unforgiveable Act, please, it's fantastic.

XXX

Coming Undone

EPOV

Walking to campus through the misty morning I could not keep the smile off my face. Although I hadn't slept much, the phone conversation with Bella last night had left me feeling euphoric. The more I knew about her the more I wanted to know. Every detail of Bella turned me on, her voice, her mind, her crazy sexiness under the shy and earthy exterior, not to mention she gave great phone. My grin widened.

I arrived at my office at 8:45 Monday morning and relaxed, looking over my tidy desk. Bella's add/drop form lay beside the neat stacks of graded labs and this weeks lab worksheet. I booted up my laptop and checked my email. A few emails from students with questions or excuses. Mr. Yorkie, in my lab class, telling me he would be absent due to the grief he was suffering over his hamster's death. One email from my mother reminding me of my impending birthday and the planned party. The only surprise was a message from Laurent, an old college friend from Chicago who I hadn't heard from in over a year. He was on a road trip up the coast from L.A. to Vancouver and would be stopping to visit Seattle next week, and was I available to hang out a bit?

James came in while I was in the middle of responding to Laurent's email. I hadn't spoken to James since the party in Phoenix, keeping as many people between him and myself as I could. As we nodded a curt greeting to each other, he smirked. I returned to my email and thought no more of him.

Dr. Banner walked into my office, knocking on the open door. "Hello, James, Edward. Edward, can I talk to you in my office?" I glanced over at James but he looked intentionally innocent. I sent the message to Laurent and logged off my email before following Banner down the hall.

He closed his office door behind us and waved me to a seat. I sat stiffly, my hands on my knees, feeling a guilty twist in my stomach. Had Bella and I been found out? Banner threw himself into his big chair and swiveled back and forth. He sighed and my heart sank.

"Edward, I've had some news and, well … I need your help."

"Wh-what-what do you need?" I stuttered out.

"I know Dr. Aro offered you a position on his research team. Have you decided if you'll go?" That was not what I had expected him to ask me about. I was confused.

"Um, I told him I'll go this summer, after the semester ends."

"That's good. Did you know he made Jane the same offer?"

"No." Jane hadn't said anything to me about it, though this did explain her talking about the Volterra research facilities on our flight back from Phoenix. She had been nearly cheerful.

"He did, and she decided to leave now, which leaves the department in a bit of a bind. I have to find someone to take over her lab class. Demetri, Victoria, and James are already teaching two labs each. I know you don't need the money, but I'd really appreciate it if you would teach the Friday lab."

"If I can't?"

"Then I will have to ask James or Victoria to do it, since Demetri is working on his thesis this semester. Is there a problem? I'd greatly appreciate if you could do this for me."

The thought of Bella with James as her teacher made me ill. I knew he would be an unfair teacher, I knew he would take advantage of her, especially once he realized I was dating her. Victoria might accept the class and accept Bella, but she would surely demand a favor, and after the wakeup humping in Phoenix I felt sure I knew what she would ask of me. Not to mention that Victoria was every bit as kinky as James. The twisted fucks. I'd never loathed James and Victoria so much as at the thought of the two of them near Bella.

I realized Banner was waiting for an answer. I jerked my head forward in what I hoped looked like a nod and said, "Yes, I'll do it."

Banner smiled and then began talking again but I couldn't follow. My head was swimming. I was flooded with relief that Bella and I weren't found out, and horror that my plans were so drastically fucked up. Bella didn't need to switch classes – it was moot now that I'd be her teacher either way.

I caught a little bit of Banner's monologue about wanting Victoria to go with him to Portland next week for a small presentation. I broke in to excuse myself, begging the need to finish preparing for today's class. That was crap. I had everything ready; I just need to catch Bella. I needed to get out of Banner's suddenly claustrophobic office.

I paced down the hallway, nearly running down James at our office door. He gave me a cool look then glanced back at Bella meaningfully. Bella's face was a mask of disgust. What the fuck was going on here? James brushed past me and headed down the hall, whistling a tune I couldn't identify. I studied Bella's face. As soon as James was gone she relaxed.

I stepped close to her, still in a whirl from the meeting with Banner. "Miss Swan, you won't be changing out of my class after all," I said tightly. Bella's face showed her confusion as her brown eyes studied me.

For a moment I couldn't speak. To say it out loud would make it real. "Jane is leaving to join the research team in Italy. Dr. Banner asked me to teach Jane's class."

"Can't someone else do it?"

"The only others Banner would consider are James and Victoria, James' other half. They… well, I'd rather you didn't take the class from either one of them. They'd fail you for spite, if they didn't try to fuck you first." Bella's cheeks paled at my blunt language. I wondered what James had said to her before I arrived but before I could ask she spoke.

"What do we do now?"

I sat down at my desk and pulled up the class schedule. I knew Bella's schedule by heart but I conscientiously turned my laptop to show her the list of classes. The only one she would be able to get into without missing classes or work was …

"James," she breathed, and shook her head. "I don't think that's a good idea." I didn't think so either but she seemed to be nervous about it.

"Did he say something to you earlier?" I asked, my suspicions resurfacing.

"He knows," she whispered. "About us. He said he wants me to 'play.'"

I felt sick. I knew what he meant, the same thing he and Victoria had meant for me in Phoenix. Although I told myself Bella wasn't naïve or completely inexperienced, the thought of her in the clutches of those two made my stomach churn. Mine. I wouldn't share and certainly not with the likes of them.

"How?" I choked out.

"He said he overheard our phone call and that you talk in your sleep."

Damn, Eddie, you even fuck in your sleep. I must have said Bella's name. Crap.

"Don't let James get to you, he has no proof of anything," I told her, trying to be calm. "He's a chickenshit. He won't talk, because then he loses his hold over us. He'd rather keep us afraid so he can force us into playing along." I was trying to convince myself as well as allay Bella's fears. James was vindictive and I hadn't gone along with his game last week.

Bella nodded weakly and I touched the back of her hand very lightly. "Go on to your class, Miss Swan. I'll see you in lab."

Bella looked at me, long and sad and intense. I wanted so much to go to her, to crush her to me, to murmur into her hair that nothing mattered but her, that I would fix all this, but I didn't see any way out of it. I smiled with as much warmth as I could muster, but my heart felt like a block of ice, cold and heavy.

With a sigh, Bella turned and walked out of my office. After she had gone I let myself sag forward until my forehead rested on the desk. Only an hour ago everything seemed perfect and hopeful and now I felt trapped. I had no idea how to fix this.

If you can't make this right … you have to call it off. I contemplated Emmett and Rosalie's warnings, Bella's words last night. The thought of giving up Bella for a day was painful, but … for two more months? I didn't think I could stand seeing her in class and not touching her silken skin, not breathing her smell, not putting my lips on her lovely body … this was not helping.

She's not gone, I reminded myself. Look at the positives. She is still here, we just have to wait. I've waited nearly 25 years to find someone who affects me the way she does, I can wait two short months. We can be friends, we can be patient. Maybe this summer … I would cling to that possibility.

I managed to pull myself together enough to teach lab, the section on organic solutions and reagents, determining the type of organic material being tested. I wheeled the cart loaded with the beakers, test tubes, organics, and reagents into the lab classroom. Most of the class was already there, seated and ready to start. I forced my eyes away from the right side of the classroom, avoiding the sight of Bella as I started explaining the lab on auto-pilot. I had no idea what I was saying and was just relying on my knowing this material so well. From the corner of my eye I could see her cascade of brown hair, and focused on the people on the left side of the classroom. Once I had finished my explanation and answered a few normal questions, I had the students come up and take a kit back to each station. I took a few deep breaths, took roll, and then steeled myself to circulate and help out the students.

I started going up the left side of the classroom, so that I wouldn't have to start out with Bella and her lab partner, the breast-brushing Mr. Newton. Everyone was doing well, smearing cells from the sample materials onto the paper and putting drops of solution on them. Everyone was focused. Here and there I lent guidance, where to put the information on the worksheet, what color they might expect the potato cells to turn, and why it was different from the sugar solution.

When I reached Mr. Newton and Bella they were working quietly. Bella's long hair cascaded down her back and my fingers twitched with the urge to weave into it. I sped past them, hoping not to have to answer any questions, not to speak to Bella in front of others, in front of students who might read something into it… I didn't even look at her as I stalked past.

Miss Mallory, right in front of Bella, called out to me as I tried to slip back to my desk, and I saw Bella's head snap up at the same moment. I tried to focus on Miss Mallory's questions, instead of looking over the top of her head to Bella's narrowed eyes. I could see out of the periphery of my vision as Bella bit her lip and turned to put her head close to Mr. Newton to speak quietly in his ear. I turned my back towards Bella as I showed Miss Mallory the labels on the reagents, as she was getting mixed up. She smiled sweetly and thanked me when I asked if it was all clear.

I returned to the safe boundary of my desk and sank down, just willing the hour to pass more quickly. I tried to appear busy, shuffling papers and pretending to check things off on the roll book. I got up to hand back papers, placing each one carefully face down on the front of each lab table. Bella didn't look up. Back at the front desk, I fussed with reorganizing the few leftover labs.

Once, glancing around the room, I caught Bella's eyes on me, but she dropped her gaze quickly. Slowly, students began finishing and cleaning up, turning in the kits and the worksheets. At last only three students remained, dawdling, really. Bella, Miss Mallory, and Mr. Newton were taking their time. Bella was cleaning slowly, and just as she was putting the test tubes back in the wire rack, she knocked against it, the bottle of iodine popping open and spilling in every direction over the table. Miss Mallory, nearly finished cleaning up, leaped up and shrieked in surprise. Mr. Newton jumped out of the way as a rivulet came towards him. Bella ran to the sink and grabbed paper towels.

"I'm so sorry," she wailed. "I'm such a klutz!"

Belatedly, Mike moved to help, but Bella waved him off. "I've got it, Mike. Go on, I'll see you Wednesday."

Miss Mallory was already heading out the door, though she shot me a pleasant smile and sweetly said goodbye as she left. I noticed her too friendly attention with only half of my brain. Mr. Newton left, barely looking at me as he dropped his worksheet on the pile and walked out. I got some more paper towels and went to where Bella was mopping up the iodine. It was making a mess on the white linoleum floor and it looked like she was pushing it off the edge of the table on purpose.

"You're making it worse," I said.

"I know," she said, turning to me with a sudden smile. "How else was I going to get you alone, Mr. Cullen?"

I bent down and started cleaning the floor. It wasn't so much, now that Bella had stopped pushing it around. She watched me, kneeling at her feet, cleaning up the iodine.

"So you have me alone, Miss Swan," I said, not looking up.

"Do you have any other ideas, Mr. Cullen? I can't drop the class; I'm too close to graduation."

"I don't have any ideas, Miss Swan." I got the last of the spill off the floor. There was a discolored area but the janitor would be mopping tonight. I stood up and turned away to take the dirty towels to the trash and wash my hands. Bella followed behind me.

"Then, that's it?" she asked faintly. I stood at the sink, my hands resting on the rim, still not looking at Bella. It didn't matter, I could feel her standing beside me, and my body wanted to move towards her like iron to a magnet. I took a breath. Be a man, Edward, take responsibility for your life. Don't fuck up everything you have worked for.

"That's it." She didn't say anything, and we stayed still, a tableau of frustration and wanting, as the seconds ticked by. "I'm sorry, Miss Swan, I don't want it to be this way."

"Me either," she said softly, "but it is the right thing to do."

"I know." I snuck a look at her. Bella was standing tensely with her head down, turned a little away from me. Her long silky hair was a curtain across her face. The dirty towels she had used were clenched in her fist. Gently, I took them from her and threw them away.

"Still friends, right?" I said.

"Right." Her voice was shaky, even the one word sounded like it was wrenched from her, and I realized she was fighting back tears.

"Hey, none of that, Miss Swan. It's okay. It will all be okay."

She nodded and it took all my control not to try to comfort her, not to draw her into an embrace. I let my self reach out to push her hair back from her face, careful not to touch her skin, and bent to look at her face. Her eyes were closed. I couldn't see her outside of class, I told myself, but perhaps … I thought of our conversation on the phone last night. Would it be enough just to talk to her, just to be her friend? Would it slake my need for her?

"I'll call you tonight," I whispered. She nodded again and turned away. Moving stiffly she picked up her book bag and walked out, leaving me in the lab alone.

James was in our office when I returned to our office from returning the cart to the lab closet. He smiled coyly at me as I walked in.

"Have a nice class?"

"Just fine," I said curtly. I sat in my chair and turned on my computer. "By the way, James, you should leave my students alone. Miss Swan was very upset about your insinuations."

He snorted. "I didn't insinuate anything, Edward, I thought I was pretty clear."

"If you have something to say, James, you can say it to me. Don't be bothering Miss Swan."

"Miss Swan. It wasn't Miss Swan last week, was it?" I just glared at him. "Fine. I know about the two of you. I just want a piece of that action, man, she's so … tasty." He licked his lips lasciviously.

"There is no action there to be had, James, and I know you have no proof of anything or you would already be sucking up to Banner with it. Leave her alone and stop sniffing around. There is nothing to find."

"Really, now? Then why were you calling her name in your little wet dream?" He smiled widely.

"What makes you think that Miss Swan is the Bella I was talking about?"

Now it was James' turn to glare. "And I heard you on the phone with her."

"Different Bella. I met a girl at Lestat's Daughter a couple of weeks ago." I shrugged it off. I used my best poker face.

James' eyes narrowed. "You're full of crap, Cullen." I just shrugged at his comment as if I could not care less whether he believed me or not.

"I'm not doing Miss Swan, James. Leave her alone."

He snorted again and turned back to his desk but I knew he hadn't given up. His tenacity was James' one talent, in and out of the lab. I let my anger at James dilute my frustration and disappointment over Bella.

I would have to stay away from Bella, but I had no idea if I had the strength to do such a thing.