CHAPTER 14

The following morning I woke up wondering to myself if everything that had happen yesterday was just a dream. Then I laugh at it, it was definitely was, there was no way that it could probably had happen.

I looked at my phone to check up on some new messages. One was from Natsume which I read instantly.

"Good morning Mikan. :) I love you"

Okay. That was not usual. I guess I was really that stupid enough to hit my head on the wall to realize that everything was not a dream, that what had happen yesterday been all true.

Good thing that today was a very peaceful Saturday which only means that there are no classes, a good thing for me! A peaceful day for me! I laughed a bit at that.

During the whole afternoon I spend time texting with Natsume and there came a point when he sang to me thru the phone.

I might add that his voice is very handsome indeed.

Every random thing happened every day, every unexpected things.

Then one day when I was walking towards school I saw some of my classmates staring at me weirdly. I thought to myself on what the heck their problem is.

I sat near Anna and told her "I might having a wrong impression but it bothers me to see some of our classmates looking weirdly at me"

"Mikan, haven't you heard what's happening on lately?"

"What's happening?" okay so something weird was really happening and I haven't got any clue about it.

"The news about you and Natsume are widely spreading around campus. People were thinking badly about you right now" she whispered.

I thought about the sentence Anna had told me for the whole day. I couldn't help it. Why would people think badly of me? Have I done anything wrong? Was it wrong to be friends with Natsume? I wasn't the one who was in love it was him anyways, so why?

I wasn't able to concentrate at school for the whole day. My mind was swamped with random thoughts and I just couldn't see any relevance at all.

The following day during our PE class, I confronted Anna about what words were spreading about me.

"Hotaru and Natsume broke up, everyone knows that" she said.

"I know that. How couldn't I?"

"You're not getting it Mikan. People think that it was your fault that they broke up. They thought of you as a third party or something"

"That's unlikely! It wasn't my idea for them to break up. I couldn't see the point of blaming me" I said. I felt mad, I guess.

"I know Mikan. I know that. But people who don't understand everything wouldn't get any clue on what's the truth behind everything"

"Gawd! If I only knew this would be coming then I shouldn't just have been friends with him after all. It broke everything!"

After I went home, I sat on my comfy bed. Thought a lot of thoughts, put puzzles of things together. I really didn't bother on texting Natsume tonight. I was not really in the mood after all.

I was afraid. Afraid of what people thinks. I was afraid that everything I've earned with the community in the school would just be ruined away. I shuddered. I don't want this anymore.

Yes, I want Natsume but as a friend because the feelings I have once gained from him had already dissolved and it feels like it would never come back.

The following day after I had went out from the comfort room,

"Why are you ignoring me?" he asked me as he pulled my arm.

"I'm sorry Natsume, there are things that are happening okay, it's hard to explain" I replied back.

Everyone were certainly staring at us, probably watching what would happen and what would they hear on the scene in front of them.

"What's hard Mikan? Why won't you let me understand it?" he insisted.

"Let's just not talk about it in here Natsume, not now, outside perhaps" I said quietly at him.

We walked outside the school campus, towards a bench at the park.

"I'm sorry Natsume" his eyes gazed at me intently.

"What are you trying to say Mikan? I couldn't understand? Wouldn't you let me?" he asked.

"Natsume, the two of us, were misfits, were not for each other, haven't you heard anything lately? I look like someone who just grabs someone out of someone. People think badly of me Natsume."

He stared at me, confused written on his reaction.

"Look, what I'm trying to say is that, it's better to end this connection between us rather than to destroy everything that surrounds us. People..." I looked at him, I knew my face looked serious "people doesn't want you for me, Natsume. They don't agree on what's happening. They would rather have you two together rather than seeing us together"

"Why do those people matter to you Mikan?" he asked. His question had me taken a back.

"Those people that I'm refering to Natsume are those people whom I had spent my whole school career with. Now those people treat me as someone who had done a hideous crime. I don't want people to think of me in that way Natsume"

"I'm trying to understand you Mikan, but I know in a way that I had been selfish, selfish enough not to be sensitive of your current situation. Mikan, personaly I don't really mind those people. For me what matters is that you, you have faith in me. Faith that I would be with you through those time people would trample you down"

I was lost for words when he said those things. I probably had a change of thought, just thought but not feelings on what to do.

But first I thought about him, if he has any chances with me. I answered to myself a maybe. I wasn't really sure.

Right now everything seems like contradicting.

Days passed by and well, some things started to change.

I admit to myself that as time passes by the chances of me being with Natsume is getting lower, I really don't know why. But every time that I'm with him and I know I'm comfortable it feels like were really better of as friends rather than being lovers. I couldn't really picture myself in his arms.

I know I've changed, changed in my way of treating him. I've changed my ways of texting him.

I rarely text him, seldom talks to him and sometimes never sees him.

I didn't bother to think if it affects him at all. I don't know.

Everything that had happened in the past just seems to be a blur in the present, everything was like some made up dream where in it have a twist of romance and a huge amount of tragedy.

I wasn't really depressed or happy in my decision of doing right now. I was just neutral. Somewhere in between.

Then one day I've finally decided that, I and he were two different things, completely a misfit of some sort or maybe just so I thought... or maybe there are still things that were waiting for to happen.

Sorry for the suuuuuuuper late update. School is literaly killing me. Senior stuffs is really a big deal. Add up the pressure for the school news paper. Well, I'll update the next chapter as well to make it up to you. :D

About the "Capture My Stolen Heart", to those who have read it, I was thinking if I should delete it or not so your opinions count if I should continue it or not. THANKS! :)

REVIEWS PLEASE!. :D

- snowqueen1205. :)