Author's Notes: Anuduh Chaptuh! Enjoy, everyone! Also, thanks for all of your kind words about the Chess Battle last chapter. I honestly didn't think so many people would find it funny.

Chapter 14: Out of the Desert and into the Woods

Enter Coron:

I entered the Inn in the town, feeling really ticked. Before the Inn Keeper could say anything, I looked him in the eyes.

"You want to let me stay for free tonight," I said.

"I want to let you stay for free tonight," the Inn keeper said in a monotone.

"You want to leave and go out into the town until tomorrow," I said.

"I want to leave and go out into the town until tomorrow," the Inn keeper said, once again in a monotone. He then turned around and left the Inn.

"Finally," I sighed, laying down in the bed. "Alone at last."

"I'll say!" King Goompa, who was standing over me, said. I screamed as I jumped back.

"You!?" I shouted. "How... when... "

"Just a minute ago," King Goomba replied.

"This place is swanky!" Red Koopa said.

"You weren't there a minute ago!!!" I shouted.

"No, I wasn't," the Red Koopa agreed.

"Finally," George sighed, lying down in a bed, "a place to rest..."

"Can you explain what the bloody 'ell is going on here?" I asked him.

George didn't answer, as he was already sleeping.

"All right!" a nerdy man in a Pharos's costume said as he was sitting in front of a computer that wasn't there a minute ago. "My Dwarf leveled up to level 18!"

"...forget it," I said, walking toward the door. "I'm not even gonna ask who you are or how you got-where's egg boy?"

"No clue," King Goomba said.

"Maybe he died a horrible death," I said hopefully.

"Or maybe he simply ran ahead to ambush Mario," Red Koopa suggested.

"Mario?" the pharaoh wannabe asked. "I totally hate that guy! He beat me in a game of chess and took the Star Card that Bowser entrusted me with!"

We all turned to stare at him.

"…chess?" I asked.

"Yeah!" the not-pharaoh said. "I thought we could settle it like civilized men, and since he didn't want to do a collectable trading card duel, we played a game of chess!"

We were all silent as we stared at him.

"…and Bowser chose you to guard the Star Card why?" I asked him.

This time, it was his turn to be silent.

"You stole it from the person Bowser chose originally, didn't you?" the Red Koopa asked.

"…maybe," the fake pharaoh said.

We all face-palmed.

"Whatever," I said, laying down in a bed. "Either shut up or leave, I need to rest."

"You're just mad because you were beat by a mouse," King Goomba laughed.

"So were you," I replied.

That shut him up.

Enter Pax:

"Thank you Mario," the Star Spirit said to me after I released her from the Star Card. "At last, I can head home to Star Haven."

"See, about that…" I said.

"You're still trapped in the card," Bombette finished for me. "Although you're no longer in enemy hands, and we can call on you at any time."

"I see…" the Star Spirit said. "Well, at least it's good not to be trapped by that geek pharaoh wannabe anymore."

"I'll say," I laughed.

"Anyway," the Star Spirit continued, "my name is Mamar. So nice to meet you in person!"

"You too," I said with a smile. "I like your bow."

Mamar giggled and suppressed a blush.

"You've still got a long way to go," she continued when she got a hold of herself, "but I just know you can save Princess Peach!"

"Everyone seems to think so," I muttered under my breath. "Thanks."

"I'll do my best to help you!" Mamar said. "If you call on me in battle, I'll lull all enemies to sleep!"

"That's handy," Kooper said.

"Call on me when times are bad," Mamar said. "Believe in this, Mario: My powers are strong… I'm a Star Spirit, after all!"

"I believe you," I said.

"Hm hm hm…" she chuckled. "Our powers are growing all the time. Keep up the good work, Mario! You must save the other Star Spirits as soon as possible!"

"Of course," I said. "Thanks for the chat. Return."

I said this last word while holding out the Star Card. Mamar disappeared in a flash of light, and her image re-appeared on the Star Card.

"So," I said, pocketing the Star Card, "next stop: Toad Town. Again."

"You think anything will drag us away from the food and rest this time?" Bombette asked as we walked.

"I hope to God not," I said.

After a little bit of chatting and walking, we came to Kolorado's tent. He and his assistants were packing up, apparently done with that area.

"Well, what ill luck!" Kolorado said as we approached him. "No clues about the ruins! I'm getting so frustrated I just might have to give up the excavation for now… How very sad…"

"Sorry 'bout that," I said, patting him on the shoulder.

"Hey, wait a minute," Kooper said, pulling out a small stone statue. "I found this in the temple. Maybe it'll help you."

"When did you-" I started.

"I say…?" Kolorado said. "Kooper, that artifact you hold in your hand… It looks like… It looks quite important!"

"No duh," I muttered under my breath.

"Pardon?" Kolorado asked me.

"I said… uh… of course, that makes perfect sense!" I said.

"Anyway…" Kolorado continued, "do my eyes deceive me, or is that a clue to Dry Dry Ruins?"

"Since it came from the ruins and all, I would think so," Bombette said. Kolorado wasn't listening at the moment, however.

"Kooper!" Kolorado said. "Old chum! I beg of you! Could you possibly part with it?"

"Of course!" Kooper said, handing him the statue.

"Cheers, Kooper!" Kolorado said. "Smashing, really, old boy!"

"…how come I never noticed before how British he sounds?" I whispered to Bombette.

"What's a British?" Bombette asked. I sighed.

"Never mind," I replied.

"Soon now, the mysterious Dry Dry Ruins will rise from the sands that conceal them!" Kolorado said. "As a brilliant archaeologist, I say it must be-"

BOOM!!!

A huge explosion sounded from somewhere in the desert. Suddenly, a chunk of the ruins fell close to where we were standing.

"And that takes care of that!" Goompa said, walking toward us. "Hi, guys!"

"…you made an ancient temple that's been around for hundreds of years explode!?" I asked him.

"Thousands," Kolorado corrected, he in shock.

"Yup," Goompa said. "It was just a waste of space, so I got rid of it."

"Why you little…" Kolorado said, pulling up his sleeves and walking toward Goompa.

"Please," Bombette said. "Let me."

She charged at Goompa and exploded at the exact second she made contact with him, causing him to be blasted far, far away.

"Nice one," I said, looking at the spot in the sky where Goompa disappeared. "That's farther than I launched him last time."

"How far do you think he would go if we both hit him at the same time?" Bombette asked me as we began walking. Goombario followed out of suspicion, and Parakarry had to convince Kooper to leave the side of the horrified Kolorado.

"Hopefully far enough to keep him away for a day," I replied.

"We can always hope," Bombette sighed.

"Hey there, Pax!" the vulture said as we passed.

"Yo!" I said with a wave.

"I still can't believe he actually fell for that load of baloney," Bombette said after we were out of earshot.

"It's convenient, at least," I shrugged.

After a little bit of walking and minimal fighting, we came back to the train station.

"Hello, sir," the conductor said, as if his whole "screw you I'm going back to toad town so long, suckers!" moment didn't happen. "This train is bound for Toad Town Station. Are you coming aboard?"

"Yup," I said, climbing onto the train. I was followed by Bombette, Goombario (who was glaring at her), Parakarry, and Kooper.

"That'll be five coins each, sir," the toad said. Deciding it would be better not to argue, I simply sighed and tossed him 25 coins.

"Thank you kindly, sir," the conductor said. "All aboard!"

The train then set off for Toad Town.

Enter Coron:

"Did you hear that?" King Goomba said when the sound of an explosion sounded.

"What do you suppose that was?" the geek non-pharaoh asked.

"Don't know, don't care," I replied.

Suddenly, Jr. Troopa crashed from the ceiling and landed in a heap in the middle of the room.

"Ow…" he moaned.

"You were in whatever blew up when it blew up, huh?" I asked him.

"Yeah…" Jr. Troopa moaned. "I think I broke my shell."

"You'll live," I shrugged. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna nap."

Coron… a dark voice said from nowhere.

"Lord of Nightmares," I said, getting on my knees and bowing to the air. "What is it, my dark master?"

Why are you not going after the Dream Keeper? The voice asked.

"He and his friends are more powerful than I had originally planned," I replied. "Forgive me, my lord. My companions and I are simply resting here for the night and coming up with a strategy to take the Dream Keeper by surprise."

"Who are you talking to?" Jr. Troopa asked. I gave him a look that warned him to shut up.

You want a strategy to take the Dream Keeper by surprise? The voice asked me. Fine. Here's what you must do…

Enter Pax:

It was sunset by the time we reached Toad Town.

"Toad Town!" the conductor shouted as the five of us hopped off the train. "Toad Town!"

"Thanks for the ride," I said as we walked off.

"Now what?" Kooper asked.

"Now we eat and sleep," I replied. "Tomorrow, we'll head out to wherever the heck we need to go in order to get the next Star Ca-"

"Aaaaaaaagh!!" a voice shouted.

"What now?" I sighed as we ran over a nearby bridge to see who just screamed. There, we saw a toad guard, curled against the wall of a building and shaking like a leaf.

"What the heck just happened?" I asked him.

"Brrrrrrrrr…" he shivered. "Juh… Just now, a ghost passed right in front of me…"

"A ghost?" Goombario asked.

"Uhhh…" the toad guard continued. "You saw it, didn't you?"

"Sorry," I said, shaking my head.

"No…" the guard said, shaking his head. "You must have!!"

He looked behind me and jumped, his face paling and his pants… ahem… well, you get the picture.

"Over there----!!!!!" he screamed, pointing behind us. When we turned to look, however, nothing was there.

"No," the toad said, looking in another direction, once again behind us, "no, the other way---!!!"

Again, we turned to look, but nothing was there.

"It went into the forest!!!" the toad screeched.

We turned to the entrance to the forest, but nothing was there.

"Ma…" the toad stuttered. "Mario, this madness has to end. Will you go into the forest and see what's going on? I'm ashamed to say it's my job, but I just can't go. I'm too frightened of ghosts! Puh… Please, I'm begging you."

I wanted to say "no". I wanted to rest and eat. But, seeing him so scared, my heart melted.

"Alright," I said. "If it makes you feel better, we'll scope the place and chase out any ghosts we find.

"THANK YOU!!!" the guard said, wrapping his arms around me in a hug (which felt really uncomfortable with his pants… warm).

"Uh… you're welcome," I said. "Please let go of me."

"Right, right," the toad said, letting go of me. "Sorry."

"It's cool," I said, walking into the forest. "Come on, guys. This shouldn't take to long."

Little did I know that it would be a lot longer than I thought.

And little did I know that by the end of this quest, one of us would be shot dead and none of our lives would ever be the same.

Okay, I'm just kidding about that last part. Scared you though, didn't I?

Author's Notes: Another chapter out! I'll try to pump out as many chapters this week as I can, so you can look forward to it! This is Pax the Dreamer, signing out.