CHAPTER 12
Eleven Days Later…
In the days after she had received her GED score, she had done none of the things she had thought Edward wanted her to do.
And that was going through the motions of normal life.
So, much to her relief, she didn't have to fill forms from universities and all. She knew that it was the first time in many years; the home had a couple of inmates who were not minors. They were eighteen-year-olds. And they were not chucked out. She had expected them to go to college and leave the Volturi Home's dorms forever. It ever happened.
Yes, she knew that Edward was eighteen too. When she had asked him about his birthday once, a couple of years ago, he had laughed and said, "It falls on some day of some month."
She had simply deduced that he didn't want to tell. And that was when they had just met. She had left it at that.
Bella was fine, until a couple of days ago Edward took her to the meadow again. He said that he wanted some time out of the Home and the hospital. She had agreed.
Edward had talked about random things like his GED preparation, his brother Emmett, and how Bella was sexier than all porn models combined. They had made out after that but nothing more than that happened. It was cold, Edward had said. And he had wanted to say something else. But he didn't say it… she remembered he was asking if the meadow reminded her of something. She had answered in the negative. But had wondered out loud as to what he meant by that question. He had said it was nothing important. She had grinned and asked him if it was the sex part. But he had said no to that too.
She had left it at that.
He was hiding something, though. That much she knew.
It was not hard to figure out that he was hiding something.
.
Twelfth Day…
Edward wasn't procrastinating.
No, he was not.
He just didn't know how to do it.
It was ironic, knowing he had made Carlisle and Esme come together. But Carlisle was not an eighteen-year-old. He didn't have those eighteen-year-old nerves.
A few days ago, he had talked to Carlisle about donors and surgeries. Of course talking to Caius about it was more…apt. But Carlisle was a friend. You go to your friend for comfort before anyone else.
Carlisle had reassured him that they would soon find someone who'd be ready to donate.
Edward had wondered why anyone would part with a piece of themselves for a complete stranger. He had asked Carlisle that. Carlisle had said some people know how good it feels to help someone selflessly.
Edward had smiled and touched his heart over his jacket. He had felt it in the inside pocket.
He had time for it. Carlisle's words gave him more hope.
He was going to make her see it.
He wasn't delusional. He knew it was a 50/50.
But why didn't that want to live die in him? Why did he see himself dying in his sleep while he dreamt of Bella? He didn't know.
Whether some kind selfless soul finds him worthy of their precious bone marrow or not, he didn't give a damn.
He had no rosy picture in his head. No picture of dreams. No picture of what it could have been. No picture of normalcy.
There was one picture though.
That picture was of Bella. She was dressed in distressed jeans, a blue t-shirt, a brown rain-jacket, and a pair of black, ankle-length, Converses. She had a half eaten apple in her hand, and she was holding on to the trunk of their tree with the other. And she was smiling. A bright, genuine and wide smile.
That was his picture.
He wanted Bella to see a similar picture of him.
He was sitting in his dorm room all alone, tracing the contours of the gray velvet box. He had his final decision made. He was going to call Bella to him, one last time.
But she had to choose between a comfortable kind of end and a life with him.
.
That Evening…
"Emmett's getting married this New Year's eve. He called last night," Edward said through his mouthful of peanut butter sandwich.
"What? But isn't he too young?"Bella was about to take a bite of her jelly sandwich.
"He loves Rose. Rose loves him. They are getting married." He shrugged.
"Married at twenty. Wow. That's kind of…strange. I mean, there is so much one can do in life at twenty. Marriage is like wanting to get old early. It's like wanting a boring youth." She snorted and shook her head and went back to the jam toast.
"Hypocrite." Edward snorted obnoxiously.
"Hypocrite?" She raised an eyebrow. Her jelly sandwich was forgotten again.
"Um hm." He nodded before chortling again.
"Care to explain, Mr. Snort Factory?"
"Well." He cleared his throat dramatically. "You married the love of your life at seventeen, Ms. McHypocrite."
"Wh-what?" she spluttered.
"Now, don't tell me you don't remember Esme and Carlisle's wedding. You married me that day."
"That wasn't marriage!" She almost yelled and dropped her sandwich on the grass.
"What was it then?" His voice was calm and linear. Like an adult's.
"It was…" He saw her eyelids flutter and then focus on his green gaze.
"It was a marriage. I had no real ring on me for you, but I felt yours on my finger…when I was with you that night." Same adult like calm in his voice.
She knew he was referring to their first time. It was strange. She had felt her ring, too.
But what was this all about?
"Edward, what are you—"
"Why did it not feel real to you, I know. And I am not hurt or anything right now."
"But you just said…" She trailed off. She wasn't supposed to say stuff like that to Edward. She had hurt him, she knew. She wasn't supposed to do that.
Fuck.
"Bella, I am glad you spoke the truth. Do you think I like it when you say and do stuff just to please me? I don't, Bella."
"But I–"
"I still want to give you your dream, Bella."
He touched her cheek bones lightly with his finger tips.
She knew which dream he was talking about.
But she didn't know what to say…
"Your dream is possible, Bella."
She could feel his determination in the air. But her sudden panic made her blurt.
"I don't like to dream. It will all crash on me in the end, and it will hurt."
"It won't. I'll make you see that."
"It won't?"
"It won't."
His smile blinded her again.
She was seeing a bright, white light.
She was seeing it without squinting.
He was smiling and saving her again.
And she was falling again…
Yet again.
-E3B-
A/N: We are close to the finish… *sniff*
'That' doesn't matter as long as Saren likes my fic. :-)