14.

I walked into the bathroom one morning, looked down at my underwear, and saw blood. I resisted the urge to scream. At least I lived above a hospital.

"Dad?!" I called, faux calm, and something about my tone had him rushing into the bathroom. He stopped and stared. "I think I'm dying," I said, my face very pale.

Instead of looking as properly alarmed as he should have been, he seemed embarrassed and sheepish. "You, uh - you're not dying," he said. "It means you're becoming a woman."

"Women - bleed - there?" I asked disbelievingly.

"Yeah. Once a month till they're in their forties and fifties."

"What."

"And if you stop bleeding altogether, that means you're probably pregnant."

"WHAT?!"

My Dad taught me the mechanics about how to deal with a period - fairly calmly and clinically; he was a doctor. But he seemed embarrassed and was unwilling to reveal anything more about what this mysterious "puberty" thing meant.

I was troubled. I'd noticed my body had started to change, too. It had begun to grow curves, like older girls had, but I was self conscious because they weren't as big as the changes of most of the girls I knew. I'd taken to wearing baggy, boyish clothes to hide my body. I had the feeling I didn't know about all this - because I didn't have my Mom.

Deciding I had no other choice, I called Tatsuki and Mizuho and told them my problem. "I - I need help," I admitted, embarrassed.

And they were immediately at my call.

"Girl," said Mizuho, "we have got you covered."

"Everyone meet at my place," said Tatsuki, determined. "Girls only. I'm enlisting my Mom's help."

So Tatsuki, Mizuho, and Mrs Arisawa all sat me down on Tatsuki's couch, and gave me a very - long - talk. We covered female reproductive health, sex, shaving, menstruation, and changing bodies all in one go. Mrs Arisawa was firm, matter of fact, and clinical, and Mizuho also treated the issue very seriously, though Tatsuki teased me some in an effort lighten the mood.

"Your body is fine," Mrs Arisawa said.

"But my curves are tiny. I look like a rectangular cardboard box," I said flatly, blushing. "I look like a boy."

"Nonsense," said Mrs Arisawa, frowning with dignity. "You focus on all the negatives and none of the positives. You're tall, slim, long legged, and elegant. You have a nice warm autumn coloring. Plenty of good things."

"Besides, some people like smaller curves," said Tatsuki. "They like the whole perky thing. Also? You've got a great ass."

"Your hair could be an advantage, too, if you cut it right," said Mizuho. I stared at her. She shrugged. "You've got the messy bedhead look," she said. "Everyone has advantages to their appearance. It's all about what you do with them."

So the three of them took me shopping and got me all sorted out. Yeah, they bought me period stuff, cotton underwear, and sports bras, but they also introduced my long shaggy hair to a new haircut, and introduced me to clothing fashion, jewelry, makeup, and perfume.

They cut my long pumpkin colored hair into a layered look that framed my heart shaped face, complete with sweeping side bangs to cover my forehead. I decided I liked updos better, so I usually wore my hair in either a bun or a hair clip slightly higher than the middle of my head. I learned over time to master the "attractively messy" look when it came to my hair.

They also taught me how to pluck and arch my thin, expressive eyebrows, and how to hold my face like I was always on the verge of smiling, but hadn't quite done it yet. Mrs Arisawa gave me a lesson in walking tall, straight, graceful, and proud - just short of strutting.

My makeup was tailored to my autumn complexion - I found warm red lipsticks and fancy brown eyeliner designs made me feel fabulous; the eyeliner brought out the brown in my eyes, and the right blush and foundation brought out the gold in my skin. I discovered I loved dangling earrings when it came to jewelry, the best for a heart shaped face being either inverted triangle and teardrop shaped, or small hoops and dangles. Yellow gold, especially with accent jewels, looked great on me. My perfume was always a warm autumn scent, my favorite being spiced apple cider (which was on the spicier, darker, almost peppery side of autumn).

"The way to a man's heart is through his stomach," said the stoical, matter of fact Mrs Arisawa. "If he associates you with yummy food, you're golden."

"Listen to my Mom," said Tatsuki brightly, as Mizuho helped me apply some perfume. "She's always right."

Then came clothes.

Apparently, the whole point of dressing a rectangle body shape was to create the illusion of curve, so I chose tops and sweaters that emphasized the slimness of my waist, plunging halter necklines, a long camel colored coat that belted at the waist, and tiny little empire dresses for my tops. I found I adored soft, flowy fabrics and materials that tightened around my body. A line skirts and knee length pencil skirts were my chosen bottoms, with leggings underneath them for winter, and my favorite summer shoes were a set of ballerina flats and a pair of pumps. Long, pointy-heeled dark boots also made me feel fabulous.

I found I loved leaf and other nature patterns, and my favorite clothing shades were coffee, chocolate, mahogany, bronze, teal, deep gold, olive green, orange, bittersweet red, apricot, rust, terra cotta, brown burgundy, and deep purple.

Aside from my sneakers and workout clothes for PE and morning runs, that became my whole new wardrobe.

I came home to my family that night, all dressed up, self conscious, the three women beaming around and behind me as if determined to get a good reaction. I was blushing, my head ducked, scowling.

My Dad's eyes widened in genuine surprise. "Wow," he breathed, forgetting for a moment to kid. "You look… great."

"Yeah, you look like a chick," said Karin in surprise, as Yuzu stood and began jumping up and down.

"Onee-chan, you look beautiful! Beautiful!" she exclaimed, and at last I smiled.

Over time, I gained my old arrogance back. I learned how to turn men down - yes, I did in fact have to learn that - and how to hold myself smugly, know my body, know and even tease about how much I had to offer. I was dangerous, but beautiful.

I came to like that dichotomy about myself.

I was just in time for my all-girls middle school.