Chapter 13
The Attack of Tachibana

At the battlefield, out of town, the L.S.A.A.W.S. were victorious, however, a group of kids, dressed in black and beige uniforms. One of the leading soldiers, in a black ponytail, called out in a booming voice.

"SO! This world has been corrupt with power!" He boomed, as the soldiers continued to attack both the Adult Resistance and the Hiiragi Twins clones.

"My fellow friends, I, Masakazu Tougou, leader of the U.S. Yagami Troupe, will help out our matter in this world! The entire universe, nay, the solar system has been shown with a slab of stain! By showing that, the entire people populace had increased! I, myself, refused to have my world become surrounded by strangers! If anybody gets in my way, they must tell it to the Raging Cajun of Louisiana! My superior strength will surpass everyone, whether alone of as a team!"

Jonesy growled, "Doesn't he ever shut up?"

Nikki called from the PA, "I checked the data on Tougou. He's a student of Yagami High. For some reason, my scanners approved of his conformation of the U.S. Yagami Troupe."

Jen thought, "So… He's on our side?"

"Don't count on it," Jonesy said.

"Negative," Nikki remarked, "The U.S. Yagami is from Washington."

Tougou concluded, "So, come on! All you adults of another peaceful race and you kids of a different assembly encounter the massive attack of the U.S. Yagami! No challenge is greater, for I am the leader of this fine group! FULL SPEED AHEAD!"

All it did was made it worse. The Tsukasas and Kagamis continued to fire their knee missiles and eye lasers. The Yagamis began to brawl, armed with kendo sticks, pipes, brooms, and their favorite weapon, their fists. All the Adult Resistance could do is retreat. But they were surrounded. Mr. Boss must die! (So says Konata!)

Konata, speaking of which, watched on and griped, "They're ruining it! Stupid Yagamis!"

XXXXX

Meanwhile, Miyuki was on the phone with the leading boss of the military.

"Miss Takara! This whole thing has gotten out of control! Ever since you & Izumi formed the Lucky Star Studies, this world has gotten worse than ever! What are you going to do about it?"

A soldier on a second line added, "People are dying, and we need to rescue them!"

"Miss Takara! I strongly wish that you may not stop! Stop this, at once! If this keeps going, the universe will implode… somehow!"

"Miss Takara-Sama, you have to end this! Are you going to let them fight, instead of stopping this destruction? You're not making any sense! Disperse this attack, at once!"

"Miss TAKARA!"

Miyuki was a bit annoyed by the repeated demands. She turned to the control panel and pressed two buttons.

BOOM!

Two building areas were mysteriously exploded. Miyuki then huffed, "It's not my problem. If Mr. Boss wanted to retreat, so be it. But he must die. (I never felt this way before)."

She got up and looked up in the dusky sky. She smiled and said, "Fully, this is a matter of circumstances, rather than the interregional war. It won't be long, before the country, surrounded by different people from every nation."

Elsewhere, April and Rei were fighting. Rei started to choke at her neck, while April rolled her down and began to stomp on her gut.

"You, you little shit!" Rei shouted, "You dare betray our queen?"

April snapped, "I don't think you know how long I had this grudge over her, you former bimbo!"

Miyazawa declared, "For the record, Tachibana is a former bimbo, because she's dead."

"Undead!" Rei yelled, as she was being socked in the jaw.

The brawling continued. Rei threw her down to the floor, while April rolled down. April was about to get up, Rei kicked her down, knocking her out. Miyazawa was stunned. Rei approached her and said, "Well… Seems that some of your friends ended up as worthless."

Miyazawa was scared, "What… What are you going to do with me?"

Rei then said, "You know too much, you dip. Yolei is the queen, the worlds have merged, April ruined Dawn's face, I am a zombie, and this world is about to die."

"Wait, what?"

She held up a fan and sliced off Miyazawa's right arm, at the middle of her upper arm. Miyazawa screamed in pain, but stopped after seeing that she was not bleeding.

"Huh. April was right," she thought, "But still…"

She screamed, "AH! Bitch!"

Rei fanned herself and replied, "Oh, don't worry. Once I slice you into chunks, I'll immerse you in boiling hot water. That's because in this world, you die by hot water."

Yukino started to quiver, "Please… I beg of you…"

April got up and picked up an axe. She crept behind Rei and held it up high.

"What do you say now, Miyazawa?" Rei smiled, "It would be so much fun now, now that everything here is making no sense. Besides, I was re-risen from my grave, after they finished Total Drama IV. I can tell what it is to die. And now… Now you may have the honor to join me. And hey, if the queen approves it, she'll resurrect you as a useful, yet harmless slave."

Miyazawa cried, "I'LL NEVER JOIN YOU! You killed May!"

Rei smirked, "Oh, she's just a useful doll now for our queen's play date. She wanted you to join, but you started to grow concerned about the world. So, she decided to end you."

She held two fans and cried, "Sorry… It's over!"

April shouted, "Not yet!"

THWACK!

April swung her axe and decapitated Rei. Her head rolled down to Miyazawa, which scared her.

"April…" she winced.

April remarked, "While I may be a dark deity, I am so smart, unlike some people. Everybody knows that to kill a zombie, you have to disconnect the head from the body. That's the brain, in case you're wondering."

Miyazawa griped, "Feh! Why didn't I think of that sooner?"

April picked up Miyazawa's arm and said, "You're going to be okay. Luckily, you won't die of blood loss."

Miyazawa snapped, "YES! You told me so, like a thousand times! You die in hot lava-like water!"

"Don't get snippy. I saved your life, damn it!"

Miyazawa then said, "Well… If it were May, I'd say thank you to her. But, since you're May, for now…"

April grinned, "Hey, no problem."

Miyazawa then responded, "I don't get it. How come you were following me, aside from observing us?"

"Well, I just wanted to protect the both of you," April stated, "It was the queen's orders. Dawn took care of the rest, when we learned that you & May were living in a home together."

"Oh, I see. But is there anything else you wanted to tell me?"

April pulled out some blue lipstick and said, "In due time, Mrs. Arima. For now, I must fix you."

Miyazawa scoffed, "And how is applying lipstick going to help?"

April smiled, "I'm going to freeze you. You'll turn into a stiff statue, with your color remaining, but we're going to revive you, as soon as I'm done."

Miyazawa blushed, "You're… You're not going to kiss me, aren't you?"

April said nothing. She kissed Yukino and held her tight.

"Wow…" she thought, "She is so hot."

Suddenly, her body started to stiffen. Her legs were in place, as she was slowly turning into a statue. April then said, "Please stand straight. That way I can proceed to fix your arm. This is an emergency procedure. I was to turn you into one, but this is serious."

Miyazawa stood straight and was immobilized from the waist up. She asked, "So, why did you kiss me?"

"This lipstick is a very special application. If you kiss someone with this ice blue #3, you'll turn into a mannequin. Somehow it was so good for me, I never used it, and since I cannot endanger people I love. Sadly, no man would ever love me, since I am a duplicate of May."

Miyazawa smiled, "I see… You're suddenly starting to become nice. But… how will-."

She was completely frozen. April laid her straight and reattached her arm, molding the ends together. She wrapped bandage around her elbow and stepped back. She pulled out a red lipstick and applied it on Miyazawa's lips.

"There. You'll be fully healed, once the hot red lipstick takes in effect. This is sort of a cure to make you move again, but it really works. I'll never understand makeup, anyway, since I am 13. In any case, if kissed, it'll immediately wake you up. However, if applied on the frozen person, it may take minutes. Good thing, too. Rei is dead, which is thanks to orange tainted juice and Dawn is a disfigured girl."

She opened her waist panel, which her waist was like a hollow tree, and pulled out a DVD. She placed it on her chest and said, "Here. I'm too ashamed to tell you, but when you wake up, everything will be explained."

She turned to the Rei zombie's headless body and threw it out the window and into a dumpster. She threw her head out, with it. April closed the dumpster and said, "Rest in peace, Super Bitch! You're so dead forever. Let's see if you can remold yourself now!"

She left to find Dawn and the queen. She left Miyazawa on the table, motionless and frozen, but only for a temporary basis.

However, Rei's body rose up, holding her head. She reattached it and snarled like a zombie. She stepped out of the dumpster and shrieked like a zombie. She walked and limped to the corridor, ignoring Miyazawa, who was still frozen.

XXXXX

April walked down the hall and was angry. She growled, "Dawn! I won't let you hurt May!"

She implied, "That was weeks ago, Dawn. You and your false face look. I ruined your face before, and I'll do it again! No one hurts my friends, asshole!"

Rei walked towards April and hissed.

"April…" she croaked, "April…"

April stopped and was scared. She turned around and saw Rei, walking slowly toward her, holding arms up. April tried to reason with her, but couldn't. Rei kept walking towards her and grabbed her. Both girls began to struggle, as Rei let out a banshee-like shrill. April was being strangled. They continued to struggle and clasp at each other, rolling around on the floor. April had enough. She kicked her off and dashed away.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" She screamed.

Rei shrieked and ran after her. The chase continued on.

XXXXX

Dawn, however, then began to undress May, who was turned into a statue. It turns out that the lipstick only turns you into a mannequin, with its clothes intact. She stripped her down and placed her clothes on the laundry hamper. Dawn then proceeded to remove her underwear, leaving her naked. Dawn then blushed and hugged her. She said, "Oh, what a cute body. Maybe…"

Miz-K Disclaimer: The rest of this dialogue has been removed. One: It's girl-on-girl, two: Pokémon fans would have a field day on me, and three: they're both about 10-12 years old, which is disgusting and illegal.

Dawn then dressed her in a pink evening gown. She then placed a gold necklace on her neck and began to carry her off.

"Queen Yolei will be well pleased by my offering," she thought, "Maybe now that lazy brat can give me a new face! I'm so sick of having my face really badly scarred."

She left to the throne room, with the May mannequin in tow.

To be continued…

Meanwhile, outside the road, Miz-K Takase was riding down the streets in his car. He saw a huge building, emitting in smoke.

"Huh?" He thought, "What the hell?"

He then picked up his phone and called, "Hey, Mizuki. We got a problem. Something is happening in the high school of… Of…"

He griped, "Aw, darn it! I don't know what it is! Just bring the guys over here, ASAP, AQuAP, Get' er done!"

He hung up and said, "Okay."

But then, his beeper went off. He looked at the number and said, "Aw, hell! Looks like I'll be late."

He pressed the button on the steering wheel and it turned into an aircraft.

"Let's hope that this vehicle will last, before I get there. Good thing that this car had been reinforced to hold any hyper speed action!"

The car flew off into the skies.

XXXXX

Elsewhere, Mizuki got the phone call and typed in an E-mail to her friends/band mates.

"Bizarreness… Sheesh," she muttered.

Coming soon to Miyazawa & May: The Gang appears