APOV

'How come I didn't notice your aura?' I questioned more to myself than them. I was at that party and I definitely didn't see Rose or anyone with an aura like that.

'Tatiana was under strict orders to keep your drinks coming all night long, otherwise I wasn't going. I knew you'd see the darkness in the aura and recognise me through that alone. She wasn't pleased, but she did agree with me eventually' she said.

'Wait, I was there! Why didn't I see you?' asked Lissa.

'You did Liss' she took a deep breath. 'I spoke to every single one of you throughout the night, including Dimitri and Tasha'. She looked so sad as she said that, looking straight at Dimitri. Wait, why does that night ring a bell?

'But…how?' questioned Lissa.

'I met some people in Russia. Mark and Oksana their names are. They are a bonded married couple and they helped me out with some healings while I was over there. The Queen got Oksana to charm some jewellery for us, to make us appear as different people. Only the Queen and her guards knew who we really were. We also went under a different name that night as well.'

'But why would she do that? Why didn't she let you come as you? I don't understand' Lissa said.

'I don't know Liss' whoa, why would she lie? Her aura just changed dramatically. 'What I do know, is that she made sure every single one of her guards knew the story with Zeklos, and I suffered taunts all night about how weak I was, how I didn't deserve to be a guardian because I couldn't even stand up for myself to a Moroi and how I definitely didn't deserve to have friends like Vasilisa Dragomir and Adrian Ivashkov in my life' Rose said.

What the fuck does my Aunt think she has been doing? I need to get out of here. All of this is her fault. She could have prevented all of this from happening to Rose. I know why she has done it, why she's so against Rose. It's because of me. She knows I am in love with Rose, but she doesn't agree with it. She can't understand how I can be in love with a dhampir and not a Moroi.

CRASH

They all turned towards the noise. Without realising it, I had thrown my bottle of Vodka up against the wall and it had shattered into a hundred pieces.

'What the hell Adrian' Eddie yelled. 'Look what you've just done to the wall! What's gotten into you?'

'I have to go. I…I just have to go' I stammered and turned around to walk out of the room.

'Adrian Ivashkov stop right there' said Rose. Wow, she sounded pissed.

'Don't Rose, I have to go' I said. I couldn't stand here like this. I needed to confront my Aunt and give her a piece of my mind.

'I SAID STOP' Rose yelled. I stopped but I didn't turn around. I couldn't face her. 'I know what you're doing Adrian. Don't do it'

'Roza, calm down' begged Dimitri. He sounded worried. 'Adrian, what's going on?'

'I know what you're thinking Adrian and you have to stop' said Rose.

'You don't know anything Rose' I snapped. Wait, why am I snapping at Rose?

'I know that you are blaming this all on yourself. I know that you think it's your fault the Queen hates me. YOU ARE NOT THE QUEEN. Get it? Nothing the Queen does reflect on you! You are your own person and I won't stand around and let you feel guilty because of things she has done! Besides, you didn't know what was going on, so you can't blame yourself!' said Rose.

'Lil Damphir, everything you've been through, my Aunt could have stopped and she didn't. Not until she was confronted by Janine and Abe, and only then it was probably because she was scared of Abe. I want to know why! My whole life I have been bossed around by her and my parents and I have let them. All the shit they have brainwashed me with over the years, is the reason I didn't push the conversation that night, and why I got so angry so quickly. I'm not a child anymore and I won't be told what I can and can't do, or who I can and can't be friends with. They WILL understand that, especially my Aunt. It IS my fault because I knew something was up and I didn't do a damn thing to find out what. I let you go because of my pride and I will NOT allow that to happen again. If they can't accept you, they can't accept me!' i was getting worked up again by the end.

I started heading towards the door again, but I didn't get very far before Rose came over and embraced me in a hug. I didn't realise how much I needed that. I was so worried that she would blame me as well. As soon as her arms wrapped around me, I started crying like a baby. I couldn't help it. I know I risked looking like the biggest wanker at that point, but I didn't care. I had Rose back in my life and tha'ts all I ever wanted. I know she loves Dimitri, and I know I will never stand a chance with her, but I need her in my life, even if it's just as a friend.

'Please Adrian, don't do anything rash with your Aunt, especially while you're angry ok. I don't want to be the reason for you and Tatiana to fall out. I'm getting past what has happened, but I can only do that with everyone's support, you included' she whispered in my ear. I just nodded my head and continued to hold her. I would help her through this in any way I can.

DPOV

I stood watching Rose and Adrian comforting each other, and I couldn't stop the jealousy that I felt. I wanted to go over and drag him away from her, but I knew they needed it. The biggest reason I felt jealous, was that she was actually letting him hug her, hold her tight. Every time I touched her, she flinched and I didn't understand why.

'So, are we heading to the pool? Or standing here crying all day' asked Christian.

'You guys head on down. I'm just going to get changed and I'll be down' said Rose.

'I'll wait if you want Roza' i said. I really wanted to get some time with her alone.

'No, no it's ok. I just have a couple of things to do first' she said. She still wouldn't make eye contact with me. Not since talking about the day she came to Court. Maybe she still has doubts about how much I love her. I need to get her alone to talk. It's not going to be easy though, everyone was trying to get time with Rose at the moment. I can't blame them. We've all missed three years of her life.

I headed down to the pool with Lissa, Christian, Eddie, Adrian, Alberta and Caleb. Janine just had to make a phone call first and said she would come down with Rose in a minute. Something is wrong. I know it is. Rose is working too hard to keep the mask up, but I can see it in her eyes.

'Does anyone else get the feeling that Rose and Janine are up to something?' said Eddie. Huh, glad it wasn't just me thinking that.

'Rose really didn't want to come to the pool. Her aura went crazy. She wasn't happy about the thought of going shopping, but it was worse when the pool was mentioned. What could that be about?' asked Adrian.

'I don't know, but if she is really that uncomfortable with swimming, there has to be a good reason because Rose used to love it. I think we should go and find out' said Lissa. I couldn't agree more.

Without saying a word, we all turned and headed back up to the penthouse. As we got closer to the door, we could hear Rose and Janine in a heated discussion. Without our heightened hearing, we wouldn't have heard it. I held my arm up getting everyone to stop. I was about to tell everyone to turn around when Rose's conversation caused my heart to stop.

'What am I meant to do mum?' she asked. She sounded really frustrated and exhausted, like she'd had enough of the conversation.

'Talk to him Rose. Every time he comes close to you or touches you, you flinch away from him, yet you have no problems hugging Ivaskhov. The poor guy is probably going out of his mind' said Janine. What in the world are they talking about? Surely they can't be talking about me?

'Mum, I can't do that. You know I can't. It hurts too much ok' said Rose. What hurts?

'Why Rose? Give me a good reason and I will back off. I just want to see you happy and I know Dimitri is the one that can make that happen' said Janine. Wow, I never thought Janine would be on my side with this one!

'I love him with all my heart and I know he loves me, but it doesn't change the fact that he is engaged. Engaged mum! I was there remember. I saw the proposal. It was hard enough standing there watching that and pretending it didn't hurt, pretend that I didn't know them! I can't stand the thought of having to watch them together all the time. I won't come between them. I've caused enough damage in everyone's life'

It was then that I froze. Tasha, I can't believe I forgot about her in all of this. But Rose saw the proposal? How...then I remembered, she was part of the band that night. She was the lead singer. Oh my god, I can't believe she was there. She saw me propose to Tasha. That must have broken her heart all over again. But that wasn't me. Well, it was, but I guess not the real me. It was the compelled to forget Rose me. I would never have done that if I'd had Roza in my life still, my feelings for Roza. My heart was aching. I couldn't move.

***** Flashback *****

Tasha was dancing around with Lissa and Christian to some upbeat song. She looked so relaxed, a big change to the way she's been lately. For the past few months she was very distant and would barely talk to me, even disappearing for weekends without a word. We were constantly fighting and I know a lot of that was my fault. She has been trying to get me to move in with her, to stop guarding Lissa and go guard her, have a life with her, but for some reason, i couldn't bring myself to say yes. I felt like I was obliged to stay with the princess, like I'd made a promise to someone that I would protect her. She took it as a lack of commitment to our relationship and we were constantly arguing.

One afternoon we were shopping and walked past a jewellery store. She stopped to look at some rings in the window, and I could see her looking longingly at one of the rings. Something told me I had to go in and buy it for her. It was so strange, I'd never thought of marrying Tasha before that, but seeing that ring, it was like it was a magnet to me. I went in and bought it when Tasha went to the toilet.

Sitting here watching her dance around and enjoy herself, something was telling me; now's the chance Dimitri, what a better way to end the night. I thought I better clear it with the Queen first, after all, it was her nieces birthday party! Amazingly, the Queen was fine with it. If I didn't know any better, I'd think she had somehow planned it.

I waited until it was almost the end of the night before proposing. I went and got the microphone from the lead singer. She looked almost pained? Huh, weird!

'Um, can I have everyone's attention please' i said. Everyone turned to look at me. Tasha went white. I walked over until I stood in front of her.

'Natasha Ozera, you have been a part of my life for so long. Sometimes I am not easy to be with, and my job can hard to deal with, but you have always been there for me. I love you more than anything in this world, will you be my wife?' by the end, I was down on one knee. Tasha was crying her eyes out and could only nod. I put the ring on her finger and stood up giving her a nice, soft kiss on the lips. The band started playing again, sounded like a song all about heart break to me, but it was an upbeat song and soon the dance floor was crowded again.

What a strange song to play straight after a proposal I thought. I didn't have time to dwell on it though, because Christian came over straight over and congratulated me, with Lissa and everyone else behind her.

***** Flashback Ends ******

I remember Lissa looking sad that I had proposed and being confused as to why she was sad. And I remember that song. Tasha was obsessed with finding a CD from that band, but for some reason could never find it. That was Rose, the lead singer. No wonder she looked so pained.

'Dimitri, are you ok?' asked Lissa snapping me back into reality.

'What?' i asked.

'Are you ok? You've gone as white as a ghost and you're like a statue' said a different voice. It was Roza.

'Uh, I really don't know' i stammered.

'What's wrong?' Lissa asked again. I looked up at her and she had compassion in her eyes. I guess she knew what I was remembering. Instead of answering her, I turned to Rose instead.

I don't know what she saw in my eyes, but the look of concern was enough to make my eyes water instantly. I didn't deserve that concern. She watched me propose to another woman. After everything she did for me, she had to witness that. She rushed to my side.

'Dimitri, you're scaring me. What's wrong?' begged Rose.

'Roza, I'm so sorry you saw that. You have to understand, it was only because I didn't remember my feelings for you' i said.

'Dimitri, what are you talking about?' She asked. Then it hit her. 'You heard mum and I talking didn't you?' she said in a whisper.

'Yes, we came back to talk to you. Adrian said when the pool was mentioned, you got worried. You didn't want to go swimming. So we came to see what else you wanted to do. I'm sorry, we weren't eavesdropping. We walked up and overheard you' it was Lissa that answered her, not me. I couldn't talk. I was frozen on the spot.

'Comrade, it's ok. I understand. All I wanted was for you to be happy and have a good life. You have that with Tasha. I am ok with that. As long as I have you in my life in some way, even as a friend, I am happy, but I'm sorry, I can't stand the thought of seeing you with her every day' she said. I could tell by the sound of her voice that it was killing her to think of me with Tasha.

'Had that' i said quietly.

'What do you mean had?' asked Rose. Of course she heard me. Nothing gets past her.

'Roza, Tasha and I are no longer engaged. We never got married. Two weeks after I proposed to her, she called it off. I don't know why. Instead of being happy, she became depressed. If anything, she became even more withdrawn from our relationship. She stayed at work longer hours, never talked to me, never visited Christian and Lissa. Then one day she just packed up her stuff and left Court. She left a note saying she couldn't do it anymore, that our marriage would be frowned upon because she was Moroi and I'm a dhampir. I thought it was strange because she doesn't normally worry about things like that' i replied honestly.

'Why would she do that?' snapped Rose. I thought she'd be happy that we aren't together anymore.

'Maybe because she felt gui' started Caleb before he was cut off.

'Shut up Caleb' growled Rose. She actually growled. I was shocked. She looked like she was ready to punch him.

'No Marie, he deserves to know' said Cal

'NO...you cannot say another word Cal, it's not our place' said Rose. What the hell is she talking about? Does she know why Tasha left? But she couldn't, because she didn't know that Tasha had gone until I told her.

'No its not his place, but it is mine. Caleb's right, he DOES deserve to know' said another voice. I spun around and came face to face with Tasha. I hadn't seen her in almost a year. She was standing next to Christian.

'Tasha? What are you doing here? How did you know we were here?' i asked.