I'd visited so many planets in the past few days: Chandrila, Tatooine, and now Naboo. It was the space adventure I'd dreamed of on Jakku.

We arrived in Theed, the capital of Naboo, after dark. There was a jetport for us to land in and Naboo had been traditionally friendly to the Resistance, so we weren't searched much by the guards. It was a beautiful, lush green planet, like Takodana and Chandrila. I followed Ben from the landing pad and thought of something from Tatooine.

"How did you pay Wald?" I asked.

"I drew credits from different purses." He glanced down at me, reticent. "It was necessary. I didn't want to steal from him."

"Oh."

It was a bustling city like Hanna, but quieter after dark. Ben grabbed my hand and laced his fingers through mine, leading me down some streets to a larger hotel than before. I still had the two kyber crystals clenched in my hand. The red one cried when I set it down.

The hotel was larger and more modern than the one on Chandrila. There were a few clerks at the front desk as Ben and I approached, and I sensed their trepidation. Ben leaned over and took two of them, clearly expecting me to assume responsibility for manipulating the last man. He was frowning at Ben before looking at me, and I swallowed nervously.

It's okay, Rey. It's necessary.

I smiled at the clerk, heeding Ben's private reassurance. "We were never here. You will listen to your coworkers, and ignore our presence. And… send extra food."

The Force echoed in his mind and his smile faded. "Okay."

I'd done it before to a Stormtrooper, but it didn't feel right on anyone else. Ben took a key from one of the other two and led me to the elevator, which we took to the third floor. It was all white and blue and shiny; definitely not a place we could afford.

"This is wrong," I muttered outside our door. "We can't keep stealing from people."

Ben slipped the card key in the lock. "It's not stealing, Rey. It's for the good of the galaxy."

We went into the room, which was much bigger than our last. The floors were beige carpet and we had a sitting room outside the bedroom with white couches and chairs. I sat down at the kitchen table and wrapped the two kyber crystals in a towel to keep them safe.

May the Force… bless you… Rey…

"They'll be bringing food soon." Ben set the Darksaber down on the table, too, and cleared his throat. "Would you like to shower first?"

I stared at the crystals, mystified by the small voice, and shrugged. "Um, it doesn't matter. Is the Darksaber… talking to you?"

"On and off. It's normal, Rey. Don't worry." He took the two halves of the other saber from his robe to set them down, too. "I'll fix this in the morning. We should be able to leave by midafternoon."

"And go… where?"

"Spintir. It's a civilized place; very peaceful. I'd intended on visiting Mustafar as well, but I think Korriban will yield the answers we seek."

"Have you been to all these places?" I asked.

Ben nodded, sitting at the table to tinker with the broken lightsaber some more. "I've been all over the galaxy. Korriban was the ancestral home of the Sith." He looked down the hilt and glanced at me. "The species, not the group. They had a symbiotic relationship with the Dark Side."

"Shouldn't we go to a balanced planet? What about Mortis?"

"That would be ideal—if we could find it." A shard of metal rattled in the saber. "Until then, we will travel to different vergences and planets to achieve a closer connection to the Force."

I shrugged and headed for the 'fresher. "I don't know how much closer we can get."

It was bigger than the one on Chandrila, and more modern. I peered into the shower, excited to see it used water, too, and started stripping out of my robes. There was another set on Daybreak, but I wanted to wait until mine were too torn up to be used any longer. I threw them in the sonic cleaner.

There is Oneness with the Force.

Ben's voice was so loud in my head that I jumped in surprise and shrieked. He drew back, apologizing, as I fumed at him across our bond. What the… Seriously?!

"Are you kidding?!" I hissed.

I'm sorry! Ben swirled in me, anxious and apologetic. I didn't realize it—I thought I was still speaking out loud to you.

I grinded my jaw in annoyance and started the shower. "Fine. Just don't pick around in my head again."

Ben's presence waned and he was quiet for a little while. I checked the temperature of the water before stepping in, relieved to be able to even take a shower. They were rare on Jakku, even with the sonic showers. I had warm food, a safe place to sleep, and all the water I could want. It was paradise for a desert scavenger like me.

I scrubbed my hair and reached out to Ben. "So, what's Oneness?"

My Dark counterpart hesitantly trickled back. Becoming a vessel of the Force itself. It cannot be accomplished in the Dark Side, only the Light, and it is exceedingly rare. Luke and Anakin accomplished it, and our situation does raise some curiosities about the same occurring with you, Rey.

"I'm not curious at all." I rinsed out the soap, relishing the smell of a fruit. "You're curious about a lot of things happening. I just want to know what the Force wants."

…That's been spelled out very clearly. He thought of us at the small wooden table with Poe, me pregnant, Ben draped over me. But I suppose why it desires that is another matter.

"Maybe it isn't about us," I mused. "It could be about our—uh—kids." I reddened and scrubbed my skin with a loofa. "But I guess it doesn't matter, anyway."

Why not? I found them charming.

"We won't be able to have any children if you refuse to touch me," I sniffed, still irritated by his polite rejection.

Ben was quiet for a while. I finished washing and stepped out of the shower to put on a white robe with the hotel's logo on the back, squeezing out the water from my hair. Fine, he could ignore me, but if we were destined to marry and have two children, he wouldn't be able to for very long.

You know how powerful your influence is over me, correct?

I hesitated, cleaning up water on the floor. "…I guess. All I do is calm you down."

Which is appropriate, and necessary. Ben paused and recollected his thoughts before continuing. Dark and Light are not equal, Rey. The Light qualms the Dark. Darkness is… different. It suffuses you in emotions that are not always easy to control. I do not want to snuff out the Light, and with how corrupting and powerful Dark is… I worry I will.

He wasn't wrong. I'd felt the influence of the Dark Side on more than once occasion, and it was tempting. But I was supposedly the Light Side in the flesh. I could resist it.

"If that's how you feel, I understand," I said. "We have to have mutual respect if this is going to work. But I hope you'll at least think about it, Ben."

I have, Rey. A lot. I believe I will always be affiliated with the Dark Side but can reconcile some parts of myself with the Light. We're both a bit gray.

I walked out of the refresher to find Ben still sitting at the table with the lightsaber. He was trying to keep himself occupied and stay from the deepest thoughts I had. His dark eyes flickered up to me and swept down the robe to my legs, then quickly shifted back to his work. The Dark pulsed.

There was a knock on the door and Ben jumped up to answer it. I went to lounge on the couch and watch the television, a rare piece of equipment in the galaxy. It mostly projected First Order propaganda and I quickly grew bored as a hotel employee rolled in our dinner.

Food! I dug in without hesitation and Ben did the same. He wasn't as hysterical as I was, but we were both really hungry. We went through the extra portions, too, different fish and vegetables from far off corners of the galaxy. I'd never tasted anything like it. Was this how most people ate their food?

Ben left without another word to take a shower. I wandered into the bedroom to arrange the sheets—either I'd sleep there, or he would.

He shifted into my thoughts, tentative. We could share the bed.

I raised an eyebrow, fluffing the pillows. "Isn't sharing against the teachings of the Dark Side?"

I've committed many acts contrary to the Dark Side.

"…True." I tugged back the sheets. "I guess I can allow it."

His thoughts twisted for a moment before returning to innocence. Good.

Then I was left alone again, arranging the bed. No big deal. We'd just sleep, like normal people. The Force was shoving Ben and I together, but we didn't have to be all over each other. There were so many mysteries to solve, and he needed to find his way back to redemption.

I was about to go get my robes when Ben knocked on the door. He hesitantly opened it, peering inside before coming in, and hung by the wall to watch me bustle around.

"I'm here," he said awkwardly.

"Yeah, I gathered that." I brushed past him to go to the 'fresher for my robes. "Don't make it weird."

Who was I kidding? Of course Ben would make it weird. I changed into my robes in the 'fresher and took a deep breath before walking back to the bedroom. It would be fine. We'd just sleep. The bed was a lot bigger, so we wouldn't be right on top of each other.

Ben was sitting halfway up when I slipped into the room. He had his hands clasped in his lap and was looking around until he saw me enter. His jaw shifted as he watched me walk up to the bed.

"Are you going to sit up all night?" I asked, sitting down on the edge of the mattress.

No. He grudgingly slid down under the sheets, glowering at me. I didn't allow women to sleep in my bed when I was done with them.

I laid down beside him, wrinkling my face in disgust. "Lovely."

I didn't like being touched, and they'd served their purpose. Something like a laugh echoed in my head. It was early in my training and nearly drove Snoke out of my thoughts. Like all things I enjoyed, he put an end to it.

"So, you're not as naive as you pretend to be," I said. "Is that for my benefit, or yours?"

Ben's thoughts reduced to a quiet buzz for a moment as he turned over my question. I'm trying to shield you from corruption, Rey. I am not naïve in… that sense; no, but I am emotionally naïve. He was terribly uncomfortable but continued. I always have been and my training with Snoke worsened it.

Another duality between us. Despite my isolation on Jakku, I was still comfortable around other people and found talking to them to be easy. I furrowed my brow, staring at the ceiling. Ben and I were two pieces of a bizarre puzzle.

"You don't have to worry about that with me," I said. I looked over at him to see he was gazing at the ceiling, too, and laughed. "I already knew you were weird."

Ben frowned sourly. Thanks. He turned his head to meet my eyes, but quickly averted them. It's much easier for me being able to speak this way. I'm not used to vulnerability.

My eyes were getting heavy. I yawned, attracting his gaze again, and nodded sleepily.

"Don't worry," I mumbled. "I won't hurt you."

And I won't hurt you. Ben paused, then turned on his side, facing me, and studied my profile. Ah… you fought well today.

"…Thanks." I turned my back to him, blushing. Weird. "Goodnight."

We were both quiet for a while. I fell asleep faster than Ben and drifted in and out of his consciousness, seeing snippets of what he was feeling. At one point he reached out to rub the hem of my robe in his fingertips, reluctant to move closer and do what he really wanted. My mind wandered deeper on its own and Ben didn't seem to notice.

"You're thinking of the girl again."

Ben is kneeling in front of Snoke, head bowed. It's not soon after our fight in the Takodona Forest. He's raw, confused, physically brutalized. He's trembling.

"A mistake," Ben says.

"No—deliberate." The Supreme Leader leans back, studying his pupil. "I thought I had purged you of these desires, but I see more work is needed."

He tears into Ben's mind without warning and Ben bites back a scream of pain, collapsing on all fours. Snoke claws through the thoughts of me, little moments Ben kept carefully stowed away to reflect on when he was sad. They're ripped up and twisted into images of Ben running me through with his lightsaber and my face contorting in agony; of Ben snapping my neck.

Ben holds back tears as Snoke hammers in horrible thoughts of him shoving me down in the cold snow and ripping off my robes and forcing himself inside me. He wrings the interrogation into a similar scenario, Ben choking me with the Force until I'm blue and violating my body again. I want to vomit and fight to leave the dark place I've found.

"If you want her so badly," Snoke croons, "you will take her like a Sith."

"STOP!" Ben screams. He's yanking on his hair, crying now. "Please—I made a mistake!"

"And you will pay dearly for it, whelp."

Snoke moves on to Ben's private moments; real memories, not just hopeful, happy musings. Most of it is already heavily damaged, graphic depictions of him assaulting the different women he was with and screaming at them to leave when he was done. He's warped Ben to the point where he doesn't know whether he truly did what Snoke carved into his memory.

It's vile. Ben vomits and collapses on his side, curling into a ball, as Snoke finally, painful draws back from his mind. It's red and raw and swirling with screams and sobs.

"Pathetic." Snoke gestures for the Praetorian guards to collect Ben. "Return this sniveling rat to his chambers. If he continues to sob, beat him. I will snuff out the Light soon enough."

I woke up screaming at the top of my lungs.