Unbidden Memories

by lalaluu

Author Note: Standard Disclaimer Applies. Retro-thanks to puppynap for the review of Chapter 11. I'm very glad you're enjoying yourself! Cecelle – you are the most awesome beta and I truly enjoy your work.

Chapter 13

Realizations

Ginny ran up to him at the end of the DA meeting.

"Andrew, can you stay after for a minute?"

"Sure," he smiled. It faded slightly when he noticed Ron glaring at him menacingly. Thankfully, Hermione and Harry involved him in what appeared to be a heated, yet whispered discussion.

Ginny returned with her book-bag and stood in front of him, smiling.

He couldn't help but smile back.

"I was really impressed by that curse you showed everyone today – you know, the one that knocked Dean on his ass."

"Corpus retrudo?"

"Yeah, it's wicked."

"If you do it more forcefully, you'll have your opponent doing backwards somersaults. Since we didn't have any floor mats, I didn't want to do that to Dean," Andrew shrugged.

"You could've spelled the floor to be softer."

"Didn't think of that."

Ginny laughed. "You're just like Harry. You think too much like a Muggle."

"That's not always a bad thing."

"No, I guess not." Ginny sighed. "Would you teach me?"

"The Thruster Curse?" Andrew asked disbelievingly.

"Yeah," Ginny grinned and stepped closer to him.

"Oh, okay. Well, you start with your feet shoulder-width apart," Andrew began seriously, "because you have to have your balance, your feet planted firmly for this one."

"Really?" asked Ginny, standing in front of Andrew, copying his stance.

Andrew looked down at her red ponytail and wondered where this was going. Ginny certainly didn't need him to teach her a simple curse. She knew more than most seventh-years.

"Right," he said, shaking his head as if to clear it. "Now make a pushing motion with your wand arm…."

"This arm?"

Andrew nodded, not thinking that she couldn't see him with her back turned to him.

"Like this?" Ginny made a wide, sweeping motion with her arm.

Andrew came around to stand in front of her. Shaking his head, he replied, "No, it's got to be more forceful." He took hold of her right forearm. "Like this." He guided her arm to make a pushing motion, starting off near the chest and stabbing forward. "Now, when your wand is pointed at your opponent, you should be saying the last syllable 'do.'"

"Hey!" Ron called. Andrew looked up to see him marching across the room. Ginny whirled to face her brother. "What are you two doing?"

"Andrew's teaching me a new curse."

"Yeah?"

"Yes, Ron. Now, do you mind?" Ginny brushed him off. However, Ron was not to be gotten rid of that easily.

"Which curse?"

"Thruster," was Andrew's curt reply. He had seen enough of the brother-sister arguments to know to stay out of them.

"Why are you teaching her a curse she already knows?" Ron asked, his face a mask of puzzlement that thinly disguised his growing anger.

"She said…"

"Well, I do now!" Ginny interrupted. "Corpus retrudo!" Ginny shouted, flinging her wand at Ron. He bowled over backwards once. While he was rubbing his head and being helped up by Hermione, Andrew dragged Ginny outside.

"What are you doing? We can't be seen!" Ginny hissed, looking up and down the corridor.

"There's nobody up here." Andrew grabbed her shoulders and forced her to look at him. "Why are you doing this?"

"What?" asked Ginny defiantly.

"Pretending. Acting like you don't know a simple spell when I've seen you pick up complex ones just by watching someone. If you want to spend time with me, just tell me." Andrew decided to break the tension with a joke, "Then we can ditch your brother." He couldn't resist smirking.

Ginny narrowed her eyes. "I've had boyfriends before and they never took this long to…" She stopped, flustered.

"To what?"

"Touch me…kiss me." Ginny looked him straight in the eye. "Have you ever had a girlfriend before?" Ginny saw a faint blush on Andrew's cheeks, the only time she'd ever seen him blush. "I didn't think so."

"I…" Andrew let go of her after finally realizing he was still holding on. "I never found anyone I was interested in before…" Andrew sighed and took a step back. After a deep breath, he turned back to find her frowning slightly. He touched her face gingerly, as if afraid he might hurt her – this fiery, tough young woman. His thumb moved lightly over her cheek as he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. It was warm, wet, and gave Andrew butterflies in his stomach. When he pulled back, her eyes were still closed.

"Is that better?"

"Mm hmm," Ginny murmured.

Andrew moved forward to hug her, but the door opened. He stopped instead and let the Gryffindors go down the stairs before him. He gazed out the window not really seeing the sunny landscape – the lake and Quidditch banners, both rippling in the breeze. With a deep sigh, Andrew turned to go back to the dungeons. It wouldn't be too difficult keeping his relationship with Ginny a secret from Slytherin House. How he was going to live only seeing her once a week, he didn't know.

Draco looked up as his mentor entered the student potions lab.

"Good afternoon, Draco."

"Professor."

"Which batch are you working on now?"

"The 30 percent hellebore diffusion with steamed wood sorrel," Draco sighed.

"Is there something bothering you, Draco?"

"No." A stir. A sigh. "Yes."

Professor Snape raised an eyebrow. "Which is it?"

Draco picked up his pewter ladle then set it down again with a bang. "This is the twentieth batch, sir!"

"I believe I have mentioned before the dedication it takes to perfect a new potion."

"The tediousness you mean!"

"That is one way of putting it," the older man dryly remarked. "I would have thought you, of all of my students, would derive pleasure from noting even the slightest difference in the potions as more or less of an ingredient is used."

"You do realize that there are 316 possible permutations of this potion? I could be here until I'm old and gray and not have accomplished anything!"

"You're only doing 30 of those permutations as we have discussed previously." Severus glared at his young prodigy. "Now, tell me what is really bothering you."

Draco grimaced. "It's Andrew."

"Where is Mr. Logan?"

"I don't know. He said something about 'giving thanks' and ran off in search of a large bird or some such nonsense…" Draco stopped short and stared wide-eyed as his godfather laughed more heartily than he had ever heard.

When the man finally calmed, he swiped at his eyes – which was very uncharacteristic of him – and smiled widely at Draco. "You don't know about the American holiday – Thanksgiving?"

Draco shook his head, still in shock at Severus' behavior.

"It is a Muggle holiday, but Americans are Americans, magical or not, so they celebrate it. Everyone gets together at a relative's house with all their relatives. They eat lots of food, and, supposedly, give thanks for all that they have."

Draco looked at him funny. "That's weird."

"They think Guy Fawkes' Day is weird."

Draco shrugged. "You know, it kinda is."

Severus' expression darkened. "You've been hanging around that American too long." Draco looked at him questioningly. "Your grammar is significantly deteriorating."

Draco smirked.

Severus crossed his arms and regarded his godson. "What bothers you about Mr. Logan celebrating an American holiday? – Besides it being an inane one?" he added at a look from Draco.

"He's never around. We don't do things together anymore."

"You have classes together."

"That's different. We have to go together."

"I see." Severus probed further. "What do you think he's doing?"

Draco frowned and set down the mortar he had been using. "I think he's spending time with the Gryffindors."

Severus raised his eyebrows, somewhat surprised. He knew that Andrew had a penchant for defying the prejudice found in Slytherin House, but he had thought, as a Slytherin, Andrew would cover his attachment to the Gryffindors better. Much better. Severus sighed. Perhaps he didn't care.

"He told me he broke up with Ginny," Draco was saying. Severus' head snapped up. He hadn't been aware that had occurred. "And I believe him, because he has this nasty habit of never lying."

"Indeed." Everyone lies, thought Severus.

"I just wish he'd study with me or," Draco waved his arms, "do whatever with me." He looked up at his professor. "We're in the same house!"

"Unfortunately for you, Mr. Logan does not see it that way."

Draco's frown deepened. "I don't think he likes me very much."

This admission surprised Severus – so much so that he was speechless.

"He's the only one who hasn't even pretended that he liked me, even if he didn't. Well, you can't count the Gryffindorks."

Severus didn't reprimand him for the harmless nickname, nor did he chuckle at it. It finally struck him who Andrew Logan reminded him of. A certain stubborn American girl he had known when he was at Hogwarts. Someone who was brazenly open about her likes and dislikes. Someone he hadn't seen in years. Of course, that woman had been on his mind for the past six months.

It was steadily getting worse. The surprise attack by Potter had proven that. He hadn't had the strength to fight him off or even to rant and roar at the boy afterward. He had let his emotions show through his normally blank façade – a slip he rarely made. Something had to be done.

He saw her enter the common room out of the corner of his eye. He did not look up from his seat on the edge of a couch in a far corner. She approached him confidently, yet her hands were twisting and clasped together in front of her. He did not look up until she spoke his name.

"Severus."

He looked up, his countenance mildly inquiring.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

He raised his eyebrows at her, peeved by her choice of words. Of course she could, and should he time her? Instead of correcting her, he merely nodded.

"Can we go for a walk?"

Again he ignored her grammar, set aside his potions text, and rose. Indicating that she should lead the way, he followed her silently.

Once they were outside, he stepped up to walk beside her. At once, it felt familiar, like old times. They walked through the cold air in silence. Down to the lake, they traced the water's edge. The overcast sky belied the early afternoon, giving the impression of the oncoming dusk.

Deep among the oaks, alders, and firs that grew along the well-worn path, she stopped. He stopped, too. Turning to look at her, he was struck by a pang of sadness. Her pale face was streaked with fresh tears, and she was staring at the rock-strewn shore. Wanting to reach out and offer comfort through touch, Severus resisted, sticking to his ultimatum despite the fact that doing so made him suffer, too.

"I wanted to tell you my decision."

Severus continued to watch her as she watched the faint ripples on the lake surface.

"Severus," she whispered, turning at last to look at him, "I don't know why you want this. I spoke to him, and he wouldn't tell me."

"Of course not." Severus regretted sounding impatient, but he wasn't going to apologize.

"But he understands why I can't be friends with him."

Severus froze, still gazing out over the lake.

"For the life of me, I don't know how he can be so matter-of-fact about it. It's as if a person not wanting to be friends with him is an everyday occurrence." She was silent for a moment before sighing. "Of course, he probably didn't care much about being my friend in the first place. He already has lots of friends."

Severus turned to glare at her fiercely. "Don't be daft. He was very lucky to have you as a friend even if it was only for a short while."

She stared at him, the same searching stare she had used on him several times before.

"Maybe," she said after a while.

"I don't see why you should be so upset over it."

"It was a difficult choice to make."

He looked into her eyes then and their gazes held – for a moment, for an eternity – until he noticed she had stopped crying.

"I choose you."

This was new. This feeling of belonging, of two people sharing one secret, one existence. No one had ever chosen him before – not like she had, giving up a similar and equally worthwhile choice. While Severus didn't think it had been, she obviously had. As he held her close, her face buried in his shoulder, his hand in her hair, her shivers brought him back to reality, albeit a more vibrant and interesting one because she was in it and she was his.

The new couple walked back to the castle slowly, prolonging the beginning – the fresh start – that a new relationship provides. His arm never left her shoulders, her hand never left his. They had to touch to prove to themselves that the other was really real.