Chapter 14 – Feelings and Emotions

The next morning Livie woke up in her mother's bed curled up tightly against her, she lay there for a while savouring the moment before she slowly disentangled herself from her mother's arms before slipping out of bed and into her room, she picked up her school bag from where she had dumped it next to her bed, she sat down and opened it pulling out the work that she had missed, yesterday she had felt hopelessly lost in class and she wanted to learn as much as possible before she went back. She stared at the pages, none of it made any sense.

That was where her mother found her, sitting on the end of her bed, a look of desperation on her face as she stared at the work, she joined her daughter, sitting on the end of the bed, "you're not going into school today" she said, Livie sighed in relief "but I have to work so you will have to come in with me" Livie looked almost happy when she heard that, "cool" she said "it's kinda fun there, Ryan and Esposito are funny" Kate smiled "that's not how I would describe them, immature more like" Livie grinned, but the moment they stopped the scared desperate look returned to her face.

They both arrived at the precinct not long later after grabbing some food on the way in, Livie was clutching a bag with some stuff to do in, but she dumped it next to her mother's desk and skipped over to say hi to Ryan and Esposito who greeted her warmly. She saw Castle standing by her desk watching Livie "she looks better" he said, Kate shook her head "she isn't" she said "she's hiding it, but she lets it come out from time to time, she's worried about her school work too" she looked at Castle "do you think I should make her see a psychologist or something, for the stress" Castle though "I don't know" he said "it might help her, or it might make her bottle it all up even more" Kate looked at him "if it was Alexis what would you do"? Castle thought "I think I would make her see the specialist" he said after a moment of thought "but only if she was willing I wouldn't force her"

Kate nodded, "that sounds sensible" she mused, she looked at him "thanks Castle, what are you doing here anyway" he grinned "I am here to ask you out to dinner" Kate froze staring at him "what" she managed, Castle snickered "not like that" he said "I am here to ask if you and Livie would like to join Alexis and I for dinner tonight, nowhere posh, just a nice meal out, Alexis is missing Livie"

Kate smiled before thinking about it, she looked over her shoulder to find Ryan Esposito and Livie all leaning forward over the desks listening to every word they were saying, when they saw that she had seen them Ryan and Esposito immediately began to try and look busy whilst Livie came forward to say hi to Castle "what do you think" Kate asked her "fancy going out with Castle and Alexis tonight" "yeah" she said eagerly "in that case, dinner sounds great" Kate said so with a smile and happy that he had secured them for the evening Castle said goodbye to them all told Kate and Livie that he would pick them up around 7 and left with a small spring in his step.

Kate turned once again Livie was now sitting on the end of Ryan's desk looking at the two other detectives who were staring at Kate "what" she said annoyed "nothing" they both said turning back to their work.

Livie followed Kate back to her desk leaving them to work for once, where Kate asked her if she thought it would be good for her to see a psychologist. Livie seemed uncertain at first but it became obvious to her that it might help. She was still so jumpy and nervous, every time a door slammed or there was another loud sound, she would jump almost a foot in the air and move closer to Kate.

Livie soon settled and began to read her text books trying to remember what she had learned, as Kate worked she allowed her mind to wonder, she wasn't sure if she had made the right decision accepting Castle's dinner invitation, if it had been just him and her she might not have accepted, though she wasn't sure, in the past month she had seen a completely different side of Castle, instead of the funny cheeky Castle she got at the office, she had seen the, calmer, comforting, understanding, family man Rick, instead and she had to admit once she had seen that side of him and he had helped her get though the month, her feelings towards him felt different.

They were no longer exasperated, annoyed and struggling to sometimes remain calm; they were sweeter and tenderer feelings, she felt differently now, that worried her, she had constantly shied away from any feelings she had towards people, except for Livie, she kept a strong professional attitude to her. And now instead of shying away from them she was almost embracing them.

She looked at Livie, she knew that Livie had hit it off with Castle, and she adored Alexis, Livie was eager to see Alexis again and she wasn't going to deny letting her see the older more mature girl who seemed to be helping her recover. Livie looked up from her book then and smiled, Kate smiled back at her then looked up as Ryan and Esposito returned from an interview "hey there Becketts" Ryan called cheekily as he entered and grinned at Livie, "doing all your mother's paperwork" he teased causing Kate to scowl at him. "So Kate excited about your date with Rick Castle tonight" Esposito asked sitting himself on the edge of her desk, Kate looked at him "it is not a date, and if you continue to harass me about it you are going to need a date with a hospital to remove my shoe from up your ass"

Ryan and Livie howled with laughter at the look of fear on his face as he edged away from Kate "technically it is a date, he asked you out" he said "do you take your children on dates with you Esposito" Kate asked him "no" he said "then it is not a date" she almost shouted before turning to Ryan who was grinning struggling not to laugh again "did you find anything useful" still chortling Ryan told her what they had found out about the crime they were currently looking at, Livie listened intently obviously curious about what her mother and the team did and how they solved their crimes.

The day passed quite quickly and soon she and Livie were getting ready to go out, they didn't dress overly up, they both wore a skirt and a nice top, they Castle's eyes still widened when he saw her making Kate blush. They went to a small restaurant, not fancy but nice and they all ordered before talking.

They talked and talked, Kate found she was laughing a lot as she watched and listened to Castle, she noticed that the warm feeling inside her chest was growing with every minute she spent with the author. Livie and Alexis sat next to each other laughing at Castle; he joked and kept them entertained throughout the whole meal, Kate smiled looking at the two girls, now closer than sisters, it felt nice she thought, almost like a family.

Castle watched Kate throughout the whole evening, she looked beautiful he thought, he loved her now, he knew it, he watched her smile at Livie and Alexis, who were so close now, he loved her smile, he loved her laugh and he loved her daughter as if she was his own, in fact there was nothing that he didn't love about Kate Beckett, she was perfect in his opinion. And right here, right now, he felt like for the first time, he and Alexis had a family that was complete.

Kate glanced at him and their eyes met for the briefest of seconds and, Rick felt love and desire course through him, he was seeing fireworks, as he stared into Kate's soul, out of the corner of his eye he saw Livie and Alexis look at each other and share a grin, they Kate looked down at her plate again, her cheeks going slightly red once again, he dropped his gaze too, watching her out of the corner of his eye whilst glancing at their children who were still grinning, he asked how the team was and gratefully Kate moved on launching into the conversation

The evening came to a close way too soon for their liking, it was very late and Livie was struggling not to show how tired she was "well" Kate said apologetically "I think we need to go, someone is tired" "no I'm not" Livie protested but couldn't hold back the next yawn. "why don't you crash at our place" Castle offered and Alexis nodded eagerly "it's close so this one can fall asleep sooner" he looked at Livie who barely had the energy to keep her eyes open now. Kate thought about that "ok thanks" she said with a smile, and after Castle paid (he insisted) they caught a cab back to his apartment, Livie fell asleep in the back of the cab so Castle lifted her up into his arms and carried her up to his floor and then up the stairs to the bedroom she had slept in last time. He gently laid her on the bed and Kate took off her shoes, kissed her on the forehead and pulled the covers over her.

She turned to the doorway to find Castle leaning on the doorframe watching with a smile on his face, "thank you Rick" she said moving towards him "we had a lovely time tonight" Rick grinned "same" he said softly, she looked into his eyes and he stared into hers, slowly she saw him move forward towards her, and slowly he lifted one hand and placed it on her cheek "you look beautiful tonight Kate" he whispered and slowly inclined his head towards hers.

At first she pulled away, but then as their lips met she found that she no longer wanted to, she relaxed and kissed him back, closing her eyes, savouring the moment, she couldn't believe it, she was kissing Rick Castle, unbelievable, she had spent so long ignoring his quirky comments brushing his compliments and attempts to win her over off. And now it was like kissing a completely different man to the one who annoyed her, he would no longer be Castle to her anymore, she now knew the Rick part of him and there was no going back now.

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