Still sadly I own nothing, but if I did...
After a while, Olivia caught a cab and made it to her appointment, she was half an hour early. Sitting in the waiting room she kept replaying the conversation she and Alex had in the diner. She had walked for an hour, then made her way here, anything even missing lunch she thought was better than having sat there while Alex looked down on her for what she had done. Sighing with her head back on the chair eyes closed waited for her appointment.
"So why don't we start with what's been going on since you were last here." Sam said smiling.
Olivia stared at her hands for a long moment, not really sure where to start, "well I got attacked in the alley next to our apartment.."
They talked for the next thirty minutes about it, Sam telling Olivia it wasn't her fault, even though Olivia kept insisting it was but wouldn't say why she thought so. Sam knew she needed some pushing about her arm, "so tell me about your hand? you said it wasn't apart of the attack." Olivia took a deep shaky breath, she didn't really know how Sam would take it, and what she would think about it. "I did it, I had to, I couldn't deal with a bad day and what was running through my head."
Another few moments later she continued, "I just had to cause myself pain, I needed to control it, I couldn't let him stay in there, you know in my head I had do it... It's what I deserved."
Sam knew a lot of people after an attack hurt themselves to punish themselves, She gently explained while Olivia was not alone in this, she shouldn't feel the need to hurt herself. They talked for the last of the time, and decided to make her appointments for twice a week. "Maybe you want to call Alex and let her know your ok, from what you've said running off from her, she must be worried." Olivia agreed and left with two appointments for the next week.
Hailing a cab feeling better having told Sam, she felt with Sam she could tell her stuff and not be fixed, Sam was not her love, and wasn't trying to make it all better for her. Olivia thought about calling Alex, but then decided to surprise her at her office.
Alex decided she had pushed enough, and would not run after her, she figured if she didn't hear from her in a few hours, she would worry then. After finishing lunch, leaving the waitress a nice tip she went back to the office to go over files and finish a motion for monday. Alex stared at the same page for ten minutes rereading the same thing. She leaned back sighing taking a break as she was still on the same thing and getting nowhere with it. After clearing her head she went back to drafting the motion.
Olivia stopped off for coffee on her way to see Alex, coffee at 5pm when you had a long day still ahead of you, was always a good thing. She knocked on her office door thinking of how she had run off and maybe it hadn't been the best thing to do. "Come in." Olivia walked in with a sheepish grin, coffee in hand, as she shut the door. Setting the coffee down, she walked right over to Alex leaned down kissing her, she licked her lips pressing gently as Alex allowed her entrance.
"Mmm," Olivia moaned into their kiss. Finally when they pulled apart needing air, Alex was not about to argue, "so what did I do to deserve that?"
Olivia ran her fingers through her hair looking down at her feet, with great interest, then finally looked into her eyes, "sorry for running out on you at lunch, I guess I just flipped out there."
Alex pulled her onto her lap kissing her again, "you don't need to be sorry, I'm not sorry I pushed, I'm glad you told me, I'm sorry you felt the need to run though."
Olivia leaned into her, placing her head on her shoulder, she didn't really know what to say at that point, for all Olivia dished out Alex took it in strides and never dished back. She couldn't believe just how amazing her ADA was, there she was forgiving her for flipping out then running off, she kissed Alex's neck with several brushes of her lips.
Moaning softly she ran her fingers through Olivia's hair before finally smelling the coffee, the kisses having distracted her. "So are one of those for me?" grinning as she asked.
Olivia nodded not moving her head, "yea, got vanilla cinnamon late's. Another sheepish grin across her face, "peace offering and all." she laughed slightly.
"Oh, so this just a peace offering, hmmm." she playfully teased back running her hand through her loves hair, grateful that for all her pushing Olivia had not only come back, but without needing to bring anything just herself, said sorry.
Olivia shot up shaking her head no, stuttering a bit, "no, no, I mean I just..."
Laughing Alex kissed her softly on the lips tracing her tongue over her detectives lips gaining entrance in gentle exploration. "Joking love, thank you for the coffee." She said as they pulled apart. "I really have to get back to work, why not rest on the couch and I will get you up when I'm done, we can go have dinner."
Olivia swatted Alex's arm as she pulled in for one last kiss, "MMmmm dinner? I'd like that." she yawned a bit as she grabbed her coffee and went to read her magazine she had bought as well. stretching out on the couch she read for a few drifting off.
Alex watched her sleep for a few minutes, looking up from her work, smile playing on her lips, she would do anything for Liv, she knew it was going to be a hit or miss on some days, but she wouldn't change it for the world, she loved her, more than she had ever loved anyone. she quickly busied herself in her work and before she knew it, three hours had passed, and at 8:30pm she gently went to wake Liv up. Kneeling down she softly kissed Olivia's forehead, pulling back so she wouldn't startle her she took her hand rubbing it, "Livvy, it's time to go, you still want dinner?"
Olivia jerked slightly, but after a moment realized it was Alex and smiled sleepily. pulling her to sit on the edge of the couch yawning as she woke up, "yeah but can we get something to take home, I'd rather watch a movie and snuggle."
Alex grinned seeing a look in Olivia she hadn't seen in a long time, she just looked so sweet and for once looked almost happy, not that she wasn't but her eyes looked brighter too. "Sure sounds perfect, pizza and garlic bread?" Olivia nodded.
The next several weeks went amazingly well, that day she admitted what she had done to her arm, and finding out she wasn't alone had done wonders for her. She had two more weeks left before going back to work and was starting to go stir crazy, she wanted to be back at work. "I can't wait to get back to work, I've been gone so long no one will remember me," she pouted.
"You know that's not true, El calls you almost daily to see how you are." Alex lightly brushed her fingers over Olivia's toned stomach, feeling a small shudder where her fingers were. Olivia gasped softly pulling Alex down kissing her passionately, slowly she was trying to get back to where they were, she wanted to be able to kiss and touch Alex without seeing or feeling him, she tried so hard.
Alex watched her carefully for signs that she was uncomfortable, seeing none she slowly ran her hand up under Olivia's shirt. After a few minutes she went up a bit more, when Olivia froze and shook her head no. Pulling her hand out, kissing Olivia's forehead she looked directly in her eyes, "it's ok." Olivia finally exhaled the breath she had held in, nodded and kissed her again, parting her lips giving Alex entrance.
Alex moaned, making a mental note not to go under her shirt so high next time. She was finally letting Olivia call all the shots, taking her ques from her while she made sure never to cross any line Olivia set, and for now it was going well. Maybe there was hope.
When Olivia started yawning, Alex rubbed her thumb along her cheek, giving Olivia those soft puppy eyes, "why don't we go lie down?"
Olivia pulled her lower lip out not able to resist those eyes, but also didn't want to stop. She grinned pulling Alex's hand gently across her stomach, hopping to keep them there, she didn't want to nap. "Let's stay here."
Alex leaned down nibbling her lip, as she pulled back, "come hold me in bed?" her amazing ice blue eyes staring at chocolate browns, Alex always did know how to get to Olivia. Even if she did have one broken arm, she knew Olivia would not let that stop her, she had one arm she could drape over her, and Alex never asked much anymore to be held. She was always the one worried and wanting to hold Olivia.
Olivia sighed happily, the brightness once again in her eyes for the second time in two days, this was one of the best saturdays they had in longer than either could remember. "You don't play fair councilor, how can I say no to that." she knew she couldn't, nor did she want to.
Grinning sheepishly she played it off, "I play plenty fair, and besides you love me detective." Standing up she lead Olivia into the bedroom.
Please as Always R/R, I'd like 5 reviews at least before I update thanks.