Disclaimer: If you think I own Harry Potter, why are you reading fanfiction? I'll clarify, again. I don't own it.
This could have gone angsty, and it is, a little bit, but mostly it's fluff. I had no idea what to do with the word 'wasted' but I think this turned out pretty good. To explain: when I'm talking about Hermione 'wasting herself on Draco' it's kind of like he doesn't feel that he deserves her, or that she's too good for him, and deserves someone better. Just to clarify.
Enjoy, and review, please?
14. Wasted.
He didn't understand it.
She was perfect. She was beautiful and talented and brilliant and happy. And she picked him.
Somehow, she picked broken, hopeless, useless him.
And that didn't make sense.
She could have anyone. Everyone loved her, and she wasted her time with him.
She wasted herself if she was with him. She wasted her beauty, and her talent, and her brilliance, and her happiness. He was nothing, and she wasted time with him.
She wasted her love on him.
There had to be someone more deserving of that, out there. Because he didn't deserve it, any of it. He was a mess and a monster, and there was someone out there who could make her so much happier than him.
And he wouldn't let her do it anymore. Because it wasn't fair to her. She deserved someone better than him. She deserved a happiness not tainted with secrets and lies. She deserved to hold someone's hand in front of all of her friends. She deserved to stop lying, to start finding something beautiful that didn't need to be hidden.
He wanted her to be happy without a secret like him.
And he would let her.
That was why he did it. And she still gaped at him for a full minute after he told her everything.
And then started laughing.
"Be happy without you?" she asked, laughing. "I'm not sure that's possible."
"Of course it is," he insisted. "Look, I'm not good for you. You… you're amazing, Hermione. And you deserve someone as great as you."
She looked at him, her laughter ending as she realized he was serious.
She chewed her lip for a moment, and quietly spoke. "You're right."
His heartbeat was loud and heavy in his chest. He wanted this. He wanted her to understand. Yes, he knew it would hurt him, a lot, but that was the point of being in love with her. He loved her. And that was why he had to let her go.
But that didn't mean it didn't hurt like hell.
She just looked at him with those intense brown eyes. "You're right," she repeated. "And that's why I'm with you."
He blinked, shocked and confused.
"Draco," she whispered. "I love you. I always will. I want to be with you. I can't believe that I deserve you. So don't even try to tell me that you don't deserve me."
He looked at her, unsure.
She traced her finger down his arm. "I am never wasting my time with you. I want to be with you. I am never wasting myself on you, because you're a thousand times better than me. Frankly, I think you're wasting your time with me."
His jaw dropped.
She couldn't honestly think that. She couldn't really believe that she didn't deserve him.
And he was so alarmed, that all he could do was kiss her.
And it was soft, but passionate. And it felt right. Just right.
And he decided, while he pulled away to see her beautiful smile, that maybe they would just have to waste themselves on each other. Maybe they would waste time with each other for a really long time.
And maybe, he was really happy about that.