"Seifer?"

There was no answer, just a slight tilt to his head to indicate that he was listening. Quistis slowed her pace, trying to gather her jumbled thoughts. The lines she had rehearsed during their quiet lunch were gone, vanishing as soon as he gave her his attention. She tried to think of a different approach, but looking at his shoulders as he walked next to her, all she could think about was the fact that Seifer needed a new coat. The seams of his long jacket were worn and shabby, seemingly ready to split at any moment.

"Could I ask you a question?"

He shrugged, but slowed his steps to match hers. Quistis plucked a loose string from his frayed sleeve and dropped it to the cold sidewalk. She toyed with his collar and rubbed her hand along his arm, feeling the threadbare cloth under her fingers. He had worn it for far too long. "Your jacket is falling apart, Seifer." She gave him a sad smile.

Seifer looked down as she tried to fix his coat. Tattered and faded, it really did look like shit, but at least it was comfortable. He could feel the warmth of her hand through the thin fabric as she brushed his shoulder and arm. Seifer considered telling her to back the fuck off, but she looked so… happy to be worried. Weird fucking bitch. "Yeah, but it's still warm."

She clasped her hands behind her back, suddenly aware that she was treating him like a child. "Y-yes, of course it is."

They walked in silence for a few minutes, neither wanting to admit that the air in Dollet carried more than just a simple winter chill. Quistis watched the way Seifer carried himself, amused that he didn't just walk beside her. He swaggered. He was a traitor, a war criminal, and an absolute bastard. Society would expect him to be cowed and humbled, but still he swaggered. She was a celebrated heroine of the Sorceress War and Balamb's child prodigy, the youngest ever to make SeeD and become an instructor. An army of adoring fans would burn a respected military institution to the ground to please her, yet she was a complete failure. Every achievement in her life meant nothing, while Seifer's acts had changed the world. Even though they had changed the world for the worse, people remembered him and trembled when they whispered his name. Quistis wondered what it felt like to strut like him. Did such primal conviction in oneself make life easier?

She was both intimidated by and envious of his raw confidence, jealous of that part of him that kept his head so high. She had often called him cocky, but his solid self-assurance went far deeper than shallow arrogance. Walking next to him, Quistis half expected the drab gray concrete under his feet to transform into a magnificent red carpet, fit for a king or an emperor, not some former soldier with a broken dream. There was no other person that could wear rags like Seifer.

Once again, she wondered about Seifer Almasy. Would he change things if given the opportunity to go back in time? If he had known what serving the Sorceress would do to him, would he still have chased his romantic dream? Would he have destroyed that dream to save himself?

And if she asked him these questions, would he give her an honest answer? Probably not. It was never about him anyway. He valued his dream more than he valued himself, and that was saying a hell of a lot. Quistis wondered if perhaps she was the one that should consider changing a few things if given the chance. Maybe if she had listened to him when he had talked about his dream she wouldn't have to ask so many questions now.

They continued walking. Seifer glanced down at her, watching the way her hips twisted and the way she flipped her hair over her shoulders. Quistis Trepe was beautiful and brilliant, but she didn't even seem to realize it. To be so intelligent, she could be the dumbest fucking bitch he knew.

When she was still his instructor, her reputation as a frigid ice queen was a joke amongst the students that weren't part of her fan club. He had used it to great advantage, teasing her and insulting her methods, forcing her to sometimes forget just what she was teaching. She would use her famous wit to respond to his disobedience, but Seifer knew that his constant jabs were fucking hell on her confidence. Every other student in the school thought she was classy and cool, the only person that could parry the sharp tongue of Almasy with a quick verbal riposte. She had driven him mad back then, always bitching at him during her lectures while favoring Squall.

Beautiful and brilliant. Adored and admired. Respected. She had everything Seifer ever wanted. She was everything Seifer ever wanted.

Every time she would smile at Leonhart or give him higher marks, Seifer would make it a point to be crueler, to cut her to her soul. Squall would ignore her and Seifer would make her cry. Well, at least he tried to make her cry. During his many detentions with her, he could always tell that she was so close to breaking down, just seconds away from laying her head on the desk and bawling.

Seifer wondered how many times she had done exactly that after dismissing him? She never seemed to leave her classroom after detention. Every other instructor would escort him out of detention, always telling him to 'fly right or be a fuck-up forever'. Quistis wouldn't do that, instead sending him to his dorm with a cracked voice and tired eyes that never seemed to lift from her paperwork.

He wanted to ask her if she hated him for fucking up her life. Would she answer him? The coward wouldn't even tell him why she liked whiskey, so could he really expect her to give him an honest answer? Probably not. He knew that she wouldn't blame him for destroying everything she had tried so fucking hard to build anyway. She would be pissed off, but then she would try to find out how she had failed him. That was just how she worked. Goddamnit, why did she have to do that shit?

They continued walking. Seifer's heavy boot fell on an unfortunate paper cup from a fast food restaurant. Anyone else might have picked it up, or at least kicked it into the gutter to be carried away by the dirty stream of melting ice, but Seifer simply crushed it without breaking his stride. Quistis laughed. Seifer Almasy wouldn't change a goddamned thing.

"What?"

"Nothing Seifer. I just realized something."

"What the fuck were you laughing about?"

"Oh, never mind."

"No. You do this shit all the time. I fucking hate it when you leave things unfinished. And what the hell were you going to ask me?" Seifer was getting pissed at her cowardice.

"Nothing, Seifer. It was just a silly question." Quistis walked faster, running her fingers through her hair. Seifer watched her denim-clad ass and hips as she fled from him and reconsidered his earlier musings. Maybe the bitch knew exactly how good-looking she was and used it to fucking torment him. She did have some serious control issues, after all.

Her eyes closed briefly when he caught up and threw his arm over her shoulders. It would have been so nice to enjoy a pleasant stroll with a handsome man, to lose herself in warmth and safety and him. But there was nothing safe about Seifer Almasy. With his heavy, insistent arm pressing against her, she was forced to either swagger along with him or be dragged on his tattered coat tails. Quistis could never decide if she hated it or she enjoyed it. He was confusing as hell and just as controlling. "Look Trepe. You either ask me or you don't. I hate this halfway bullshit with you." He squeezed harder, pulling her to his flank, smashing those hips he loved so much against his own. An idea occurred to him. Dropping his hand from her shoulder, he let it slide to that perfect ass. She looked up at him in surprise when he let it linger on the pocket of her jeans. What the fuck was he doing? Quistis tried to jerk away, but he held tightly, grinning at her embarrassed face. "Now, Instructor. Why won't you ask your goddamned question? Are you afraid that I might…"

SLAP! Gentle pressure turned to painful heat when he slammed his palm against her ass. He shook his hand, the cold flesh burning and stinging from the sudden blow.

"…give you a fucking answer?"

Quistis stopped walking.

Seifer smirked.

She lifted the corners of her mouth in a mysterious smile.

Seifer licked his lips. He loved it when she was pissed. And the blue sparks from her eyes looked like they might melt the ice over the entire city.

Quistis pressed her hands into his chest, slamming him into the brick wall of a convenient building. An old woman dressing a mannequin in a storefront window stared at them with shock evident in every feature of her wrinkled face. Seifer winked and flipped his middle finger to the old bitch. She closed the curtains, leaving the two hoodlums to be arrested on the street once the cops found them. Damned perverts.

A peculiar rumble sounded from Quistis' throat when she tore his jacket open and slid her hands under his clothes. She pushed against him, making very sure that he was aware of every one of her curves. And fuck her, she was almost purring. "Oh Seifer, why won't you ever listen to me?"

"Fuck you, Trepe. I was trying…What are you doing?" Her hands were sliding over his chest and abdominal muscles, moving in slow southward bound circles. "Oh God, Trepe, I was trying to listen to you."

"No. You were trying to force me to talk. There is a huge fucking difference." At that moment, Seifer decided that he was going to hit Quistis more often. He closed his eyes when she nibbled his throat and licked his earlobe. "Oh, Seifer. I want you to listen to me so fucking badly sometimes, but you always act like an absolute prick." She was warmth and heat and vibrating temptation and her hands were everywhere. And they were in the middle of the fucking street! Seifer was thankful that she had so rudely shoved him against a wall because he didn't think he'd be able to stand up otherwise. "Holy fucking shit, Instructor. I never would have thought that you…" She silenced him with a fierce kiss that made their teeth click together.

"Shut up Almasy. Understand this…" Oh God, what the hell was she doing? Seifer looked around, grateful that the cold weather was keeping the streets of Dollet clear from pedestrians. Quistis smiled when Seifer began to slide down the brick façade of the old building, gripping her waist with one hand and using the other to balance himself. He was so fucking easy to control sometimes that it almost wasn't fun any more.

Almost.

Quistis smiled and murmured against his cheek, still trying to teach him how to listen. She heard his breath quicken and his boots scrape on the concrete. "…I am not afraid of your answers, Seifer. And I am certainly not afraid of you."

"Fuck, Instructor. We're gonna get arrested out here if you don't…" Seifer didn't care. It wouldn't be the first time he had been arrested and he knew that it probably wouldn't be the last. Goddamn it, she was beautiful and crazy and completely out of her mind. "…don't stop."

Quistis pouted her lips. "I was rather hoping that you might shut up long enough to listen to me, Seifer. Pity." A final breathy kiss and she stepped away from him. Quistis began walking down the sidewalk, her hands now in her pockets. Seifer watched her go in utter fucking disbelief. Did that cunt really think that she could just walk off like that and expect him to follow her?

She smiled when she heard his outraged footsteps behind her and felt his hands on her upper arms. He lifted her from the ground when he tightened his grip and spun her to face him. "You goddamned bitch! What the hell was that about, Quistis?" She laughed when she felt bruises forming under his fingers. "Aw, what's wrong, Seifer? Are you upset that I didn't finish?"

"Don't be stupid, Trepe. I knew you wouldn't give me a hand job in the middle of the fucking street. But you obviously have something pretty fucking important to say if you're willing to do something like that just to get me to follow you." He grinned. "And yes, that was an evil trick. You can be cruel as hell sometimes."

"Maybe I just wanted to make you beg, Seifer. I grow very tired of trying to talk to you when you won't…" Blue eyes opened wide when his mouth covered hers, silencing her sharp tongue with his own. He pulled back, chuckling when her lips followed his, amused by her disappointed sigh. She tried to liberate her hands, but his arms were like iron bands. "Let go of me, Seifer."

"No."

Quistis smiled. "Touché, Seifer. Now, pretty please, with sugar on top, release me."

"Ooh! Who's begging now, Instructor?" A single sculpted eyebrow rose at this presumptive attitude. Seifer was smart, but she was a fucking genius. And she intended to make sure that he remembered exactly who was the brains of their dysfunctional partnership. Leaning into him, kissing and nibbling his bottom lip, Quistis slowly slid her knee up his thigh to make her position very clear to him. "Please, Seifer. Put me down… before I knee you in the balls." He growled against her mouth, but obliged his captive, dropping her to the sidewalk. Their lips parted and she buried her face in his chest, blushing furiously when she realized just what she had nearly done in such a public place. "I think it would be a very, very good idea to continue this conversation indoors."

"My place or yours?"

Quistis slapped him in the arm. "Too many horizontal surfaces. Let's go to Joey's and talk over drinks."

"There's always the bar, you know." Quistis punched him this time. "Yes, but if you want to try to fuck me on the bar while Birdie is standing guard, then be my guest. I'd much rather not have to worry about that club of hers."

-------------------------------------------------------------

"You've brought the wrong forms, Xu. These are the basic applications, not the departmental transfer forms." Squall eyed the stack of papers in Xu's folder. Since they were stuck while waiting for either Quistis to appear or for Birdie to yield her address, he thought that he could work on the forms to re-hire the former instructor. It was technically Xu's job, but he was willing to do any little task that would hasten his return to Balamb.

Xu wiped her mouth before she answered her commander. The chicken wings at Joey's were very good. She carefully looked up at Birdie, who was busy serving drinks to thirsty customers. Good, she was ignoring them. "Don't be stupid, Commander. I'm sure that you recall that she was terminated. I've brought form 23-B, which is standard for any civilian seeking a position at any of the three Gardens, and forms 102-C through G. I've covered all of the bases, commander."

"But she's not a civilian. She's SeeD. And what the hell are 102 forms?"

Xu tossed a spiced wing at Squall's head, chuckling when the red sauce left a greasy stain on the commander's forehead. "Fuck you. I know what I'm doing."

"Shut your goddamned mouth, Xu."

"NO! Fuck you. I'm no longer SeeD, you're no longer SeeD, and she most certainly is no longer SeeD. You made damn sure of that when you became headmaster, you fucking jackass."

Squall glared at Xu, wondering what she would look like with a chicken bone crammed down her throat. Grimacing, he cleaned the spicy smear off of his head. "I am well aware of that, Xu. I just meant that…"

"Holy shit! You've been sitting in here for over six hours and you've only had five beers, you pussy! Are they hitting you so hard that you've forgotten that you dismantled SeeD?"

"I'm not a seasoned alcoholic like you, Xu."

"Ooh! Ouch! Score one for Commander Leonhart! He thinks he's really hit a nerve with that one!" Xu snatched her folder from Squall. He had no fucking right to read the forms that she had brought for Quistis. "Big bad Commander drinks a few beers and forgets that he stripped a military organization of it's finest soldiers because he wanted to protect his little girlfriend. I hope, oh I really fucking hope that when your precious princess flips out and tries to destroy the world, she starts with you. That way, when she kills the rest of us, I can die happy."

Squall slammed his fist on the bar. "Fuck you, Xu. I've told all of you over and over again that Rinoa is different. That won't happen."

"Oh really? Gee. I fucking forgot. Pretty Princess Rinoa is different." Xu gestured for Birdie to bring her another cosmopolitan. Lowering her voice, she continued her questions. "But just in case, Commander, what do you plan on doing if that madness hits her? Gonna pick up the phone and dial SeeD?" Pinky finger against her mouth and thumb to her ear, Xu mimed a telephone call. "Hello? Hi, yes, I have a sorceress that needs to be exterminated. Oh? You mean SeeD no longer exists? Oh, gee fucking whiz. I guess I'll have to call Sorceress Busters instead. They're still in the yellow pages, right?" Xu flipped her middle finger to Squall and moved to the other end of the bar. If she sat next to him any longer, she knew that she would snap. Lights blinked on the Triple Triad machine when she deposited a few gil. Xu fully intended on ignoring the pompous jackass until Quistis was found.

"Keep it up, Xu. You're nothing more than a glorified secretary anyway." Squall mumbled to himself as blue eye shadow and spider lashes squinted at him. Birdie stubbed out her cigarette and leaned over the bar. "Hey, kid. Why are ya such a dick to everyone?"

"It doesn't concern you. Mind your own business."

"Look here, kid. Yer the one that came into this bar to start some shit with one of my girls. Yer business is my fuckin' business. Why are ya such a goddamned asshole?" Birdie put a shot glass in front of him and poured a drink.

"I'm not an asshole! Nobody else knows what I have to face when…never mind. I refuse to discuss this with…" Squall jumped when she slid the glass to him. "What the hell is this?"

"Just drink it. Ya fucking need it." Birdie watched Squall cough and sputter when he poured the rum down his throat. Yes, he was a dickhead, but Birdie still felt sorry for him. She had listened to the hushed conversations between him and that girl named Xu ever since they had sat down at the bar. Birdie could tell that this boy wasn't cut out for leadership. He could lead, and from what she knew from the newspaper articles about the war, he could lead effectively. But he didn't like it. People respected him and relied on him, but he resented it. Birdie could see his chest rise when Xu told him about another meeting; she could hear his sighs when he realized that he would be crammed in an office to answer the calls she said were waiting on his return. Birdie wondered why he allowed himself to be led by those he was supposed to be leading. Grinning when he rested his head in his hands, Birdie thought to herself that just because a person could lead, didn't mean they should.

"Fucking HELL! This damn thing is rigged!" At this outburst, Birdie turned to the ball of fury currently playing the electronic version of Triple Triad. "Oh, what the hell is the matter, eh gal? Don't go gittin' all upset just because ya can't play fer shit."

Xu grinned at the bartender. "I know I'm not that fucking out of practice. It's been a while since I've played cards, but I'm still fucking good at it. The only person that has ever been able to beat me is Quistis. And I'll be damned if I let some twinkly bastard of a machine beat me at Triple Triad. I played a motherfucking Tiamat card to the machine's Gayla. There's no way in hell it could beat me. The bastard is rigged." Xu crossed her arms and chewed her lip. No fucking way.

Birdie laughed and bent closer to Xu. "Shit, hon'. Don't go tellin' the boss I told ya, but yer right. The damn thing is set up so folks will keep shellin' out gil. If ya really want to play cards, there's another bar a few blocks away that…" Birdie looked up when she felt the icy wind blow in a couple of customers. "Hold on, let me get these orders and I'll tell ya where to go if ya want to really play some cards while yer in town."

Birdie wiped a sticky ring from the bar and looked up to find Quistis and Seifer walking through the crowd. "Well, I'll be fucked. There's Blondie and Mr. Sexy. What're ya doin' in here on yer night off, hon?"

"What?" Xu dropped her cosmo on the floor, ignoring the shattering glass and splash of cranberry juice. "Is she…fuck! Quistis!" Xu leapt out off of her barstool and flew across the scarred floor of the bar. "Oh God, Quistis! I fucking missed you!" Quistis was knocked into a table when Xu tackled her and planted a huge kiss on her cheek.

"You goddamned bitch! You just fucking disappeared and never called and then you…you…"

SLAP!

The loud pop carried over the sounds of the jukebox, silencing every conversation in the bar. Quistis raised her hand to her cheek and felt the stinging red fingerprints on her face. She would have been livid if it had been anyone else, but it was Xu. Quistis considered herself lucky that she escaped with just a handprint. It could have been a black eye. "I have been so…so…fucking worried, and you…" Wrapping her arms around Quistis' neck, she hugged her tightly and continued to curse her. "Goddamn you, why didn't you fucking call me? I was so afraid that you were hurt or lost or…"

Quistis closed her eyes. She could smell Xu's shampoo and her perfume, could feel her watchband snarling in her hair. Quistis ignored the sharp pain when the leather band pulled out several strands of her hair. It didn't matter. For a brief second, she was with Xu again in their shared dorm, giggling and dancing and just enjoying life. There was no war, no SeeD, no Garden…just her best friend. Quistis laughed and returned the hug, still unable to believe that Xu was in Dollet. Oh God, how wonderful, but…

Seifer felt a wild surge of jealousy at the way Quistis' eyes glittered when she finally opened them to look at Xu. She had never looked at him like that. When she looked at him, there was always a twisted jumble of emotions in her frozen blue irises, hatred, anger, lust and at times, a strange sort of affection …but never had she looked at him with such trust and love. He knew that he had done nothing to earn her trust, but it still cut him deeply that she could give it so freely to others. "Well, well, well! It looks like dear, darling Instructor is having a little party." He smirked when Quistis' face fell and her shining eyes clouded.

Xu tore her gaze from Quistis and noticed Seifer for the first time. She automatically reached for her weapon, then remembered that she hadn't worn her gun. Quistis laid her hand on Xu's arm when she saw her friend's brown eyes scanning the bar. Knowing Xu, she would probably make a run for a pool cue or a handful of darts. "If it ain't the fucking Lapdog. I'll be damned. Where the hell did you come from, Almasy?" Seifer grinned and leaned against the bar. The Queen Bitch of Balamb had found her way to Dollet. What a small fucking world. "I'm thrilled to see you too, Xu. It's nice to see that you haven't had that forked tongue ripped out of your mouth. Not yet, at any rate."

He pulled out two stools and gestured for the ladies to take their seats on either side of him. When Quistis simply stood between him and Xu, wide-eyed and silent, he looped his arm around her waist and roughly pulled her down next to him. He leaned over and took Quistis' face in his hand, lowering his voice to a lethal whisper. "Why the fuck is she here? Is this why you were so fucking eager to come here tonight?" Quistis shook her head. Chances were good that she would have bruises on her chin to match those on her arms. "I had no fucking clue she would be here, Seifer." He didn't believe her, angrily shaking off her hands when she reached for his wrist. "You sure as hell seem happy to see her."

"Of course I'm happy to see her! She's my best friend!"

"Why is she here, Trepe?"

"I don't know! I'm sure she's been worried about me! The whole fucking school has been looking for me. You are well aware of that." She finally succeeded in taking his hand, gripping it tightly with both of hers. Pressing her lips to his knuckles, she pleaded with him to understand. "Please, Seifer. I didn't know."

Xu's mouth dropped when she saw Quistis whispering with the most hated man on the planet. Taking the other stool, she was shocked to see that he was listening to Quistis and not trying to strangle her. Wait. Surely Quistis and Almasy weren't …oh God. The Lapdog? Running her hands through her short hair, Xu could feel her fingers shaking. Fucking spectacular. Quistis was working in a dive and she was screwing public enemy number one. Shit. She needed a drink. A very, very fucking strong drink. "I thought you had finally crawled into a hole and died, Almasy."

"If only we could be so lucky."

Quistis felt Seifer tense and watched chartreuse embers flicker into green-flamed life. Spinning around, she saw Squall standing behind her, staring straight at his old rival. She tried to keep Seifer in his seat, but he ignored her, slowly standing to face Leonhart. "Seifer, please. Sit down with me. Please."

"You seem to be doing very well for yourself, Almasy."

Seifer hesitated for the briefest of seconds. There were coincidences and then there were fucking coincidences. And this situation was shaping up to be neither a coincidence nor a happy fucking accident. He jerked his hand free from Quistis' desperate grip. "What the fuck are you doing here, Leonhart?"

Squall's eyes narrowed. "I'm sure as hell not here looking for you, Lapdog. You just happen to be in my way. Again."

Quistis buried her face in her hands when both men ignored her. She felt like she was teaching them all over again. Barbs and insults flew over her head. Curious bar patrons watched the exchange in anxious glee, certain to see blood fly at some point during the night.

Rolling her eyes, Xu took Seifer's vacant seat and ordered two vodka stingers. Sliding one to Quistis, she settled back and waited for the show to begin. "Hey, Q! I think Almasy is getting ready to…Quistis? Hey, girl. Are you okay?" Oh well. She didn't come all the way to Dollet to watch a couple of grown men beat the shit out of each other anyway. Her only interest was sitting next to her, in obvious painful need of a friendly ear. Xu affectionately rubbed the gloomy blonde's back. "Come on, Q. I need you to look over these papers with me. Garden needs you."

"Goddamnit Xu. They don't fucking need me. If it wasn't for the Trepies, then…"

Xu slammed her folder to the bar, exasperated by Quistis and her fucking confidence issues. "Bullshit, Q. It's not just because of the Trepies. I need you too, you silly fucking whore. Besides, you are way too fucking pretty to work in a place like this. Not as pretty as myself, of course, but still, you ain't half bad." Quistis laughed. She missed Xu more than she realized. Curious, she flipped through the forms that her grinning buddy stuck in her face. Quistis frowned. "Xu, why did you bring these 102 forms? Unless things have changed since I've been gone, then they're used to…" Quistis raised a single eyebrow over her glasses, looking at Xu with an unspoken question.

Xu squeezed Quistis' hand and pulled a pen from behind her ear. "Exactly. I've already completed them for you. I just need your signature here, here, here…initial here and here, then sign one more time on the last sheet." Quistis eagerly signed and initialed at every highlighted 'X'. Maybe things would work out after all. A new teaching job, a fresh beginning, her best friend by her side, and Seifer with a bloody nose. What the fuck? Quistis jumped from her seat when Seifer was thrown against the bar. He laughed at her shocked expression then jumped back into the melee.

"Seifer! What the hell is going on?" Quistis and Xu had been so absorbed in their conversation that they failed to notice that the bar was in near chaos. Squall and Seifer were at the center of a churning mass of sweaty bodies. Seifer's face was covered in blood and his beautiful white teeth were stained a fearsome bestial pink. Quistis tried to enter the fight to retrieve him, but Xu grabbed her arm and pushed her behind the bar. Diving in behind her, Xu shook her fist in Quistis' face. "If you even think about jumping into that mess and getting those perfect lips busted to hell, then I will kick your ass myself, Q."

"But look at him! He's…"

Xu peeked over the bar just in time to see a neon light advertising Iron Giant Pale Ale fall directly on Squall's head. Dazed from the unexpected blow, he wasn't quick enough to dodge the pool cue that was broken over his back by a huge man that had obviously been in more than one bar fight. Seifer was grappling with a skinny jaundiced man who managed to keep his cigarette between his lips even as Seifer's elbow crunched into his nose. The nicotine-addled man fell to the floor with a loud thud that was lost in the din of drunken shouts and flying bottles. "Oh, don't worry Q. He seems to be handling himself just fine."

Seifer searched for Squall, finally locating him as he pushed a gigantic fucker into the jukebox. "Hey Puberty Boy! That's one hell of a shiner you have there. Did your hand slip when you were zipping up that gay-ass jacket?" Squall impatiently flicked dark hair out of his eyes and dug his heel into the portly monster's nutsack. He wiped blood from his lip and limped towards his hated adversary. "Screw you, Almasy! Why don't you ask your fucking girlfriend? She's the bitch that punched me when I…" Squall's eyes rolled back in his head when Birdie's beloved club collided with his skull. "Ah ha! Number fifty!" A mad cackle and Birdie leapt back into the fight, swinging Old Bess left and right, knocking heads and cracking kneecaps with a manic glee. What pity she had felt for the young commander was long gone. If that puny fucker hadn't tossed his beer bottle at Seifer then none of this would be happening. She heard sirens and saw flashing lights. It was about fucking time. The pigs always took forever when there was real potential for someone to get killed. It fucking figured. The cops were on Joey's ass about underage drinking and the occasional illegal football pool, but when trained assassins were in the bar knocking folks unconscious and shattering skulls and bones, then they decided to take their sweet ass time. Fucking pigs.

"Shit." Seifer heard the screech of brakes and slam of car doors. He had to leave and he had to make it quick. Where the fuck was Quistis? He kicked and shoved, punched and elbowed, finally making his way back to the bar. He saw Xu's dark head duck behind the oak. Sliding across beer and broken bottles, slicing his forearm open on a jagged piece of brown glass; Seifer reached down and jerked Quistis from the floor by her hair. Xu jumped on him and started pummeling his head. "Goddamned son-of-a-bitch! Get your fucking hands off her or I'll chew your fucking balls off myself!"

"Goddamn it! I'm trying to get the hell out of here! The cops are in the parking lot and we need to go!" Seifer staggered when Xu's fist landed in his temple. Stars and darkness danced and twirled in front of his eyes, forcing him to grab the bar for support. Quistis caught him before he fell, stumbling from his weight. "Help me, Xu! He's heavy!" Xu grabbed her folder with one hand and Seifer's arm with the other. Noticing the crooked gash, she smiled and dug her thumb into the fresh wound. Rage and pain cleared the clouds from Seifer's hazy green eyes. "What the FUCK is wrong with your friends, Instructor? Fucking hell!"

"Shut your goddamned mouth, Lapdog. You don't feel groggy now, do you?" Xu huffed and fumed, unable to believe that she was dragging a semi-conscious war criminal through the back door of a seedy bar. Un-fucking-believable.

"Groggy? Are you kidding me? I've just been digitally violated by a woman that has bigger balls than I do! Do I look like I'm fucking groggy?" Xu snorted at his assessment. "Well just be glad that Quistis is so fond of you, cause I'd have gift-wrapped you and left your ass for the pigs."

The trio snuck through the alley behind Joey's, grateful that the police had not yet blocked off their escape route. They lurched and tripped over rancid garbage and forgotten bottles, ducking behind dumpsters and garbage cans when blue lights flashed overhead. They managed to stay hidden for a few blocks before they reached a dead end. Forced to the main street, they breathed a collective sigh of relief when they discovered that they had left the sirens and lights far behind. Feeling a bit better, Seifer shook off the helpful arms of Xu and Quistis, and then promptly fell to his knees. "Goddamn it, Xu! Where the hell did you learn to punch like that?" Xu grinned when she bent down to help Quistis pull him back to his feet. "Just don't ever piss off Q. She can hit much fucking harder than I can, Lapdog." Seifer groaned, leaning heavily on Quistis' slender form. "Fucking mean bitches." By the time they reached her apartment, all three were sweaty, bloody, and exhausted.

In spite of the madness…or maybe because of it, Quistis threw her head back and laughed. "Welcome to Dollet, Xu!"

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Squall groaned. Gingerly touching the swollen lump on his skull, he winced when he discovered that it must be the size of a grapefruit. Eyes snapping open, he felt again. What the fuck? Panicked, he ran his hands through his hair. His glorious, shiny, thick hair now had two huge bald patches where fisted hands had tangled and pulled. Squall sat up from the narrow cot…

"Cot? I was on the fucking floor! What the hell? SHIT!" Squall limped to the bars of his cell and yelled for the guard. A surly, acne-scarred officer answered his call, sticking his thumbs through his belt loops and swaying on his heels as Squall tried to explain his position. He squinted and squirted sticky yellowish-brown tobacco through his teeth. Squall's lip quivered in disgust. "Well, I reckon I can let you make your phone call, but it'll have to wait until morning. Looks like your ass is stuck here tonight." Whistling, he left Leonhart to fume and pace.

He was going to kill Almasy for this.