A/N: So, it's here. I honestly can't believe it. I'm finally actually finishing this fic! LOL. I'm so sorry it's taken me forever to get to this ending. I know it's been a long time coming for some of you, basically a year & two months actually. It's just S2 kind of took a toll on me as did it for other people if you hadn't noticed. Also, certain bits got inspired by random stuff. lol This last chapter's going to be set up into 4 different parts. It just felt like that's the way it should be written so that it would flow. Oh and warning, I never got a chance to check over the last 2 parts for spelling/grammar so sorry if there's any mistakes. hehe Well, enjoy! :)
Special Thanks: It just seemed like I had to thank my friend on here Lauren aka suspensegirl, for giving me a much needed push to write this. I appreciated your comment on my laziness and constant motivating this whole way through. You are awesome, hun. :P
Reccommended Songs To Listen to While Reading:
Part One & Two: Ring of Fire by Adam Lambert (His version just TOTALLY tugs at my heart somehow)
Part Three: Off I Go by Greg Laswell or Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You by Led Zeppelin (For some reason, it was these two songs that helped me get into Chuck's head. The first one made me think of what quote to use, the 2nd one was totally how I think Chuck felt at the end of 1x18 in a way)
Part Four: Heart by The Pretty Reckless or With Me by Sum41 (Whichever one you prefer. :P But if I had to choose, I'd pick "Heart". lol)
"Did you say it? I love you. I don't ever want to live without you. You changed my life. Did you say it? Make a plan. Set a goal, work toward it. But every now and then, look around. Drink it in. Because this is it; it might all be gone tomorrow."
- Grey's Anatomy S5 Finale Ending, Meredith Grey
(For some reason I freaking love this quote! It truly fit the amazing G.A. finale & I think it works almost any fandom really. It inspired the name of the chapter & also Part 3)
Chapter Fourteen: Did You Say It?
The next morning, Chuck & Blair woke up together with smiles tugging on their lips. They laid there, wrapped into each other's arms, quite content. They continued to stare at each other quietly for a few moments; neither wanting to break the silence. It was nice being like this. Oblivious to the rest of the world. Even if it was just for a short amount of time. Only, Chuck found himself wanting to hear that beautiful voice of hers. So, breaking the silence, he spoke. "Morning, Waldorf."
Blair simply gave him a lazy smile with a yawn that followed before she planted a brief kiss on his lips. "Mm," she mumbled with closed eyes. Finally, she replied reopening them. "Morning, Bass." She grinned, not even trying to control herself in that moment. There really was no need to. She was allowed to be act like this. Out of the corner of her eye, Blair saw the sunlight coming in from the outside. She freaked out for a second, jerking away from him.
"Wait." Her eyebrows furrowed, sitting up. "Chuck?" What time was it?
"Huh?" Chuck asked distractedly. He was too busy stroking her hair, something that Blair had discovered that he seemed to like doing whenever he got a chance to.
"Shouldn't we be going soon? What time is...?"
Chuck held his hand up with a smirk. "Relax." He kissed the corner of her mouth. "It's still pretty early. Flight's still not for a few hours." He calmly pulled her back to him, his arms securely around her waist. "We've still got some time before we have to hurry."
"Oh?" Blair relaxed at his touch instantly. "And what will we be doing during this time?" she asked with a matching smirk as she moved herself so that she was now straddling him and her hands were cupping his cheeks.
Chuck grabbed her hands, taking them into his own, and kissed her knuckles. "Whatever you want, princess."
Blair practically beamed at that. "Wonderful idea." She kissed him passionately before asking, "So, is all of that 'taking it slow' business finally out of your system now?"
Chuck nodded, then turned them over so that he was now on top of her. Blair giggled in response. "Uh-huh." He leaned his forehead against hers as he whispered to her, "You were right."
"About what?"
"Before." He looked at her the same way he had been looking at her most of the time this week. It was an undescribable emotion that she couldn't quite decipher. He looked as if he was seeing into her soul or something. It was kind of scary but in a good way. "When you asked if I could handle it," he continued. "The truth? I can't." He clenched his jaw. "I mean, I can... but just barely." He had added the last part quietly. It was as if he was embarrassed to say it. But she understood why. Chuck Bass was always in control of his emotions. Or so he was supposed to be.
Blair kissed him gently, letting him know she knew what he meant. There was no more that needed to be discussed for now. "Chuck," she purred his name into his ear. The same way she did that first night. The same way she always did when she did when she came undone around him.
Chuck buried his head into her neck as he spoke against her skin. "I thought I was doing the right thing." He sucked there as he slid his hands down to her ass. Blair couldn't hold back the moan that escaped her.
She took a moment before responding, quite breathless. "Well, it was certainly admirable, and I appreciate it. Truly." She smiled as she captured his lips once more, slightly giving one of them a slight nibble. "But, no more," she added. She gave Chuck a look to let him know that she was completely serious. "Take me."
He knew that she was clearly turned on and wanted him. Which is why, with a smile, he answered, "Your wish is my command, my Queen." He leaned down so that his lips was an inch away from hers. "Come here, baby."
And came she did.
It was after that when they resumed to just laying there like what other people would call fools in love. Not that either one would say something like that out loud. It really wasn't the time, Blair realized as she laid there in thought. But she could feel like she was in love with him. She could feel this way, keeping it to herself until the time was right. After all, Chuck had wanted to do this right and who was Blair to deny him of that?
Besides, if she really wanted to tell him, she could always just tell him in Tuscany. About how she was starting to feel like she was in love. It could work. There they'd be, all alone on a romantic getaway. She could tell him as he made love to her and hope that he would respond back appropriately. But what if he didn't? Blair flinched at the thought. Maybe she shouldn't say anything. Yes, definitely not.
For now, she was fine with just this. Lying there peacefully without a care in the world. Who would have thought, Chuck Bass was a cuddler in secret? But she was sure it was only because it was her. She knew he had never done this with another girl. That much was obvious.
Chuck, staring at the ceiling like she was, spoke. "Blair?"
"Yes, Chuck?"
"You know that I meant what I said last night, right?" He looked as though his life depended on her knowing that he had. Blair found it quite flattering.
"I know," she whispered, faintly smiling. "And so did I." She felt a tug at her heart, reminding her that they had limited time before they soon had to leave. "How much time do we have left?" she asked reluctantly with a frown.
Chuck checked his watch. "Well, I was actually thinking about seeing my father before we left so..." he drifted off. He wasn't quite sure what her reaction to that would be.
"Oh," she said flatly.
"To see how his honeymoon with Lily went and all, you know." Chuck squeezed her hand.
Blair nodded, reassuringly. "Oh, I know. Actually, I think it's quite considerate of you." She grinned over at him. "Besides, I still have to pack-"
"As do I," Chuck stated, cutting in.
Blair continued, sitting up in her spot. "And Serena should be coming over soon to help me. She said she wanted to say goodbye to me properly for the summer."
Chuck nodded, getting up as well. "Okay well, that should work."
"But I'll see you at the helipad." She hadn't planned for it to, but it had come out of Blair's mouth more of a question than an actual statement.
"Of course." Chuck grabbed his pants off the floor, sliding them on. He stared over at her, apologetically. "Sorry I won't be able to give you a ride there."
Blair waved her hand, dismissively. "Oh, it's alright. I was hoping to get there early anyway." She got up from her bed, walking towards the bathroom.
"Huh?" Chuck quirked his eyebrow, buttoning his shirt. He suddenly seemed to realize why. "Oh right. You and the jumpseat." He chuckled. "Always needing to be in control." Blair glared, raising her eyebrows at him. He gave out another chuckle. "I find it highly amusing that you'd think that I would actually let the two of us fly with a pilot that has no idea what they are doing. I mean, honestly, Blair." He shook his head, giving out a howl of laughter.
Blair pouted, crossing her arms in disdain. "Chuck!" she huffed.
Chuck calmed down, realizing his mistake. "Sorry. I was only poking fun, Blair." He cocked his head. "Don't you know that?" He sighed. "To be fair, you've always been like this with flying."
Shrugging again, Blair walked past him as she headed for her closet to get her robe to wear, and her luggage so that she'd be prepared to pack. "Well, maybe I'll behave differently this time."
"Why's that?"
Blair sat the luggage case on her bed. Indifferently, she said, "Perhaps with you being there, you'll be able to find a way to calm me down properly."
"Perhaps," he replied with that unforgettable smirk. "Can't wait." He gave her a peck on the lips. "Now, I'll be there as soon as I'm done talking to my father, okay?"
"Well, where else would you be going, silly?" She giggled. She did have a point after all.
"True." He smirked over at her. Then it seemed a thought had occurred to him at that moment. "Huh."
"What is it?" Blair asked, slightly worried with a frown. Was something wrong?
Chuck frowned to himself. He seemed to be disappointed about something. "I just realized... I never told Nate that I was leaving."
Blair drew out a sigh, thinking about what Chuck had just said. "Wait, you didn't? Why not? I thought that the two of you were friends again. Aren't you?"
Chuck's lips formed a smirk again. "Well, to be fair, I've been occupied by this certain brunette that I know so well most of the week. It turns out that she can be quite a handful." He chuckled to himself.
"Not the whole time." Blair pursed her lips, not buying the excuse. "And I managed to tell Serena the very next day after you invited me to join you."
"Yeah, but that's different."
"How's that?" Blair tilted her head. Suddenly, her eyes widened. "Oh." A second later, she scoffed. "Well, why should you care what he thinks? Yes, he was once my boyfriend but he is also your friend, and has been for years. He'll be supportive about this when you tell him. And if he isn't, don't worry about it." She stroked his cheek tenderly. "Okay?"
Chuck only gave a silent nod in response. He still seemed a bit uncertain about it but he put a genuine smile on his face anyway.
Blair pressed her lips against his passionately as a way to comfort him. It seemed to relax him. "Now go. Call him and tell him." She smiled at him brightly.
"I will." Kissing her once more, Chuck made his way for the door. On his way out, he glanced back at her for a moment. "Bye, beautiful."
"Bye." Blair watched him leave her room, trying to catch her breath again.
Get a hold of yourself, Waldorf.
But she found that she couldn't. She was way too excited now. She ran off towards her closet to find the perfect outfit to wear during the flight.
It's crazy how much can change in a matter of minutes.
A person can make a mistake they'll regret for the rest of their life in just one single moment. Whether they meant to actually or not, it usually doesn't even matter. You're screwed. There's always consequences for your actions. And whether you like it or not, eventually you have to face them.
That's the one thing that Chuck Bass found that he couldn't do.
Why didn't I just go to that damn helipad?
It was the only coherent thought that would come to his mind as he sat there all alone in his suite on the sofa, staring off into space while drinking his scotch. He continued to ignore the ringing of his phone. He knew who it had to be; Blair. Who else would it be?
He stared at the caller ID. Of course. Blair Waldorf could read on the screen. He rolled his eyes, sighing. What was he supposed to do?
Deep down, Chuck knew that there would come a time when he would eventually need to face her but right now did not feel like that time. Besides, it was too early for her to know what he had actually done. It had only been a few hours since he had sent her the text. She was clearly just checking in on him, probably bored.
With another sigh, Chuck went to listen to the voicemail that Blair had left. He was surprised to feel a pang at his heart when he heard her jubilant voice on the other end.
"Hey Chuck. I know, I know. I have a feeling I'm going to appear clingy right now by making this call, but I refuse to ever call myself that." There was a brief pause. Chuck noticed that it seemed she had become suddenly nervous. She lowered her voice. "I was merely calling to let you know that I couldn't wait to see Italy, and of course you. I have to say... This flight is so boring! There's this guy, Ben," Another pause. He could totally picture her rolling those beautiful brown eyes of hers right now. "He seriously has the worst jokes ever. I'm just glad I managed to get the jumpseat." He felt another pang in his chest at her next words. "I wish you were here with me. Well, I guess I'll be hanging up now. Tell your father & Lily that I said hi. Bye for now."
Chuck threw his phone down, unable to listen to the message again. He would have to delete it later. She was just so happy. It truly shocked him how painful hearing her voice was already.
There was a knock on the door. Chuck finished his scotch, placing the glass back on the bar. He knew who it was.
The interior designer had arrived. They had made plans for her to come by later since Lily & Bart had went out for the rest of the day. Pulling himself together, Chuck headed for the door. This was what he wanted.
Right?
He told himself that it was. He loved Blair, he truly did, but Bart's words continued to play over and over in his head. How could he be ready for all that? Things would be so completely different now.
Though, if Blair really knew him the way he had told his father, wouldn't she have expected this? Would she really want him to change? He rubbed his forehead before opening the door, pushing away all the thoughts that were currently plaguing his mind.
There she stood. The blonde home designer whose name he couldn't recall at the moment. The old Chuck Bass was back it seemed.
"Hello." Amelia, he finally remembered, smiled up at him coyly. "Let's talk about your room, shall we?" She brushed her way past him into the suite.
He wanted this, Chuck reminded himself as he turned around to follow her. He wanted this, right? That was the whole point of him staying back, letting Blair take off for Europe alone.
He still wasn't sure if he was going to follow her when this was all done. How could he face her after this? She would hate him, wouldn't she? She had already had this happen to her before.
Chuck hadn't had much time to think before the blonde pulled him to her. She pressed her lips against his, eager and sloppy. He tried to respond back but found himself almost bored instantly.
All of his non-stop thinking about Blair before seemed to have finally sunk in a bit. He was suddenly thinking about what he was doing. He finally looked at the blonde who was kissing him more properly than he had earlier. She wasn't Blair.
This wasn't what he wanted. He didn't give it a second thought when he pushed the woman off him.
She stared back up at him in puzzlement; her eyes wide in fear. "What's wrong with you?" She tried to laugh it off as she tried to lean in again. Only Chuck made it so that she couldn't.
"Get out of here," Chuck simply growled at her.
"What?" The girl was clearly not one to like feeling used. Well, too bad.
Chuck glared her down, letting her know that he meant business. "I'm not into this right now. You've gotta leave. Now."
Amelia gaped at him, clearly offended. "But you're the one who-"
Sighing, Chuck put his face in hand. What else could he say to get her to leave? Through gritted teeth, he cut her off icily. "Leave."
Scoffing, Amelia straightened herself up. "Fine." She stood before him with a scowl, her hands on her hips. "Just so you know, you're an asshole."
Chuck took the woman by her arm, leading her towards the door. "I know." He slightly pushed her out of the suite. "Now go." He slammed the door shut and headed for his bar, cursing himself as he drank another scotch. He looked at himself in the mirror, glaring at his reflection.
He truly was an idiot. He should have just met up with Blair like he had planned. He was screwed. Technically, he hadn't done too much wrong but that didn't matter. He knew if he told Blair she would still be pissed off. Right?
That's when he decided he wouldn't go to Tuscany.
He spent the next two days after wasting away in his room, doing nothing but drinking really. Finally, he felt the need for fresh air. Or something like that at least. He called for his limo, not sure what he was planning to do. He just knew that he needed to get out of there. Now.
As Chuck sat there in the limo, he stared out at the outside world around him. He saw a happy couple walking down the sidewalk, hand in hand. He felt like he was being mocked. Why couldn't he have that? Or better yet, why had he given that up? Why had he felt the need to prove his father right, that he hadn't changed?
It was his pride. It had to be. It always was.
He told his driver to stop when he noticed where they were. Outside of Central Park. He got out of the limo slowly, feeling a tug at his chest. Why had he wanted to come here? Why? To cause himself even more pain than he was already feeling? Probably.
If that wasn't bad enough, his phone started ringing. Oh no.
She knew. Of course, she knew he wasn't coming. It had been a couple of days since he had texted her, after all.
He almost answered it. But he was too terrified. She was going to be raging mad the next time she saw him, that's for sure. So he let it go to voicemail again. And once again, he listened to it right after, as he walked smoking a joint.
She had been calling him the past two days over and over. With each time, he could tell she was losing faith in him. With each call, the fact that he wasn't coming was obviously starting to settle in. She was giving up on him, no longer in denial. With this call, it was quite clear that this one would be the last.
At first all Chuck could hear on the other line was Blair's heavy breathing, possibly from crying. He could feel his heart breaking for her. Finally, she spoke. "Chuck Bass, I cannot believe you. Here I thought maybe there was a chance for us to do this properly. And then you go and prove me wrong. I must be idiot for having thought that you could possibly..." She paused for a moment, her voice breaking a bit. "You know I was thinking about telling you something once you got here but you know what? I'm not going to. You don't deserve it, and you never have. Trust me, I won't be calling you again. Goodbye, Chuck Bass!" She snared at him at the end, coldly, hanging up.
Chuck closed his eyes, trying to push away the pain that he felt but briefly it took over him. One single tear dropped from his eye, and for him that was too much. He headed back to his limo, unable to handle this. He was not going to do this.
That was the day he vowed somehow he was going to forget about Blair Waldorf until he would have the chance to face her again.
That was also the very same day Blair vowed to herself that somehow she would make herself fall out of love with Chuck Bass.
"The last time I gave a speech about Nathan and Haley was, well at their first reception. I remember saying, 'Prepare to be surprised.' Well, I have to say even I was surprised; because, you see they do something that's very rare to see in someone our age. Actually, it's very rare to see in anybody; they give their hearts to each other, unconditionally. And, that's what true love really is. It's not this fairytale life that never knows pain, but it's two souls facing it together and diminishing it with unconditional love."
- One Tree Hill, Lucas Scott
(For some reason, I watched the OTH S3 Finale recently and when I heard this quote, it totally made me think about how I want to see CB's relationship. The facing pain together and stuff, I mean. LOL.)
The summer ended quite badly. Blair came back as Chuck knew she would but with a guy in tow. James was what he said his name was. Only it turned out he was lying. His name was Marcus and he was royalty. And he was everything Chuck wasn't.
Things started to happen, he noticed. Chuck began to do things he wanted to take back if he could. At the time though, it had seemed right. It was what he always did, scheme and manipulate so that he could have things the way he wanted them. It worked in a way because he never felt the need to show Blair the real him in the process.
But somehow Blair's relationship with Marcus almost instantly faded. And there even came a time when she found herself needing Chuck's help again like she used to, only things were different now. He helped her out but in the end, he choosed to raise the stakes. He threw her own words back at her when she stared up at him with a frown upon her face. "Eight letters. Three syllables. Say them and I'm yours.
When she refused to say it, he pulled away. He wanted her to fight for him now. He wanted her to see how he'd been feeling ever since she came back.
Eventually, Blair realized she was still in love Chuck. Only, neither of them could say it.
Chuck said it was because it would be the end of what they were. He didn't think they'd last, and the words broke her heart. But then he got down on his knee, appearing as if he was proposing to her even though she knew he wasn't. They should wait he said. "Maybe in the future," he promised. Blair reluctantly agreed with a tearful smile, and that was when he kissed her goodbye. She almost didn't let go of his hand, but she did and he was gone. She silently sobbed herself to sleep after that.
But Chuck remained in her life. He wasn't really leaving her, they just couldn't be together. Still, her heart ached for him whether she liked to admit it or not. She tried to move on but when they danced at the Snowflake Ball, she decided to just let it go for one night. But when news arrived about Chuck's father's death that night, she knew sh was going to be there for him no matter what.
It was like the vow she made to Chuck the day of Bart's funeral when she finally told him that she loved him. She would stand by him through anything, she claimed. When Chuck rejected her, she felt weak. But when he came back to her room that night all was forgiven. The lost, broken look on his face was enough to melt her heart. It crushed her. She held on him even as he slept. There they spooned the way lovers did. But of course once Blair was awake, she saw that Chuck had left her again.
She found herself not wanting to give up on him like his letter told her to. She wanted to stick to her promise that she made to him. Only, on New Years Eve she found herself drunk, alone & vulnerable at Penelope's party. She wanted Chuck to be there.
She called Jack, Chuck's uncle. She askd him again if his men had found him yet. He told her that they hadn't but they were going to be looking in Japan next. "Anything else you need?" he asked her wickedly.
"N-no, I'm f-fine," she slurred her words. Jack could tell she was intoxicated so he used this to his advantage. He offered her a ride and she refused. Yet there he was waiting for her outside Penelope's. He gave her a ride but it was to where he was staying, not her penthouse. Before she could even think about it, clothes were gone and so was Blair's loneliness even if for just a moment. After, she felt dirty and used like a whore, which she hated. She left the minute it was over, ashamed of herself.
Days go by before she finally heard news about Chuck. He'd been found and Jack brought him home. Things finally seemed to be looking up for her and him until Chuck failed her once more. She couldn't stand seeing him self-destruct like this. She knew she made a promise to him but she couldn't watch this anymore. It was killing her on the inside now. So, she told him that she was done for good, throwing his flowers for her back at him.
The two of them drifted apart after that.
Chuck tried to win Bass Industries back from Jack. Also, he seemed to find 'love' again, or so he thought. He quickly learned after Elle walked away from him that he had been fooling himself by trying to replace his heart's true desire. He just wanted to feel like the hero for once. He had wanted to start fresh and be able to save someone. But in truth, he knew he had only been in denial.
Meanwhile, Blair kept herself focused on her future. Her dream. Yale. Only when the new teacher came into the picture, that dream felt threatened. So she seeked for revenge. Only of course, consequences followed this. College now seemed completely out of her reach. Blair also realized things are not as they appear. After hearing Nelly Yuki's harsh words to her, Blair decided to give up. She made a total mockery of herself by drinking, stealing, and sleeping with Carter.
That was when the two of them collided again. Chuck came around by her place, trying to be there for her it seemed. He wanted to save her. Only Blair denied him until the one time he wanted her to. He couldn't do this. He couldn't just take advantage of her like this. Not when she was drunk this way. So he let her slip away again. Back to the Prince Charming himself. Nathaniel.
Now being honest, he knew that he played a huge part in causing that to happen. He didn't deny it later but back then it didn't occurred to him what consequences would happen because of his actions. He was jealous, a feeling that he had finally learned about the year before, involving the same guy. How could he let this happen again?
He went to Vanessa for help, not even realizing just how much this plan could backfire on them. Nate lashed out at Vanessa and it was clear what he going to do. He was going to get Blair. That was when both Vanessa and Chuck both lost it. They slept together that night and then again the next morning but it was purely for comfort and revenge. Besides, yes Chuck found the Brooklynite exceptionally attractive. Wasn't too terrible in bed either, obviously. But there was going to be no further occurrences like that between them though. He had already done the whole sex escapade thing and look where that led him. All alone pining over a girl that clearly wanted things to go back to how they were. And who was he to deny her?
So he went back to his old ways: womanizing.
Trying to forget about Blair wasn't easy in the slightest but that was inevitable. Just like he said the two of them were. He found himself unsatisfied.
Damn you, Waldorf.
Though it wasn't really her fault. They had both been in denial about this whole thing for over a year now but she had finally let him in whereas he had run away like a coward. He truly missed her. Jenny forced him to realize that one night. Then Nathaniel came to visit him that very same evening.
He had to be supportive. So he tried to play his role as the best friend like he knew he was supposed to. So he told Nate the truth. That he has to appreciate Blair for who she is. To never want her to ever change.
Nate seemed to take that a cue to leave him. Clearly to make up with her. So this was how it was meant to be. For him to be alone? Ah, well. He just couldn't win, could he?
Only when he saw Blair spying on someone wearing that adorable beret of hers, it almost seemed like he was being given another opportunity to be back in Blair's life. Even if it was for only a moment. They got to scheme together for Serena again, just like last year.
Chuck didn't plan to do anything behind Nate's back until that very 'best friend' crossed the line by basically telling him that he didn't trust him to his face. How could he say that?
So yes, maybe he wasn't being too mature, dragging Blair away from her first night alone with Nate in their new apartment but Chuck honestly didn't care. He didn't want Nate to feel like he could just use Blair as a way to get back at him. He wanted him to love her the way that he always wanted to but never could. Besides, it was his jealousy that was screaming to come out again. Chuck tried to get better about it but Nate's actions and words caused him to retaliate.
But somehow he eventually seemed to accept that he couldn't be what Blair Waldorf needed. No matter how much he wanted to be. Their conversation at the bar proved this. The second he saw that single tear roll down her face, he knew what he had to do. So he did what she told him to. He let her go because he loved her. He knew that he couldn't make her happy the way she deserved to be. He never could.
Only at Prom, he did just that. He made her childhood fairytale dream come true. All it took was ruining Nathaniel's mediocre planning and voting for her 150 times for Queen so that everything could be perfect. And that was all he wanted. No praise, no thank you. Just the sight of Blair's smile when she won Prom Queen was enough for him. He was glad that she was happy. And she was. Or so he thought as he left.
But it seemed that night, something struck Blair to the core. For a split second she saw Chuck's grin in the audience. She stood there taken aback and realized that he couldn't have been trying to ruin her night if he could be so happy for her at that moment.
Wait, what was she doing thinking about Chuck right now? She was dancing with Nate!
As they danced, Blair thought about her future with the boy whose arms she was tightly wrapped in at that moment. She saw what all of that would entitle in a flash and she found herself disappointed. It wouldn't be horrible she knew, but it also wouldn't be fully satisfying either. Deep down, she knew that it would always feel as though something was missing. She knew that being with Nate would be comfortable, yet hadn't someone say that you weren't supposed to settle for just that?
So she ended it. Just like that. It was over just like high school. Yet she hadn't feel too much pain. She simply kissed her first love one last time before later going outside to get some fresh air.
Serena came and found her after a few minutes. She sat down and they hugged once Blair told her what happened. Eventually, Serena let it slip that Chuck told her that he loved Blair the day before.
Blair had always known it but hearing it caused her heart to swell. But there was a problem. Why couldn't Chuck say it to her himself?
After the Gossip Girl fiasco at Graduation and being called a weakling, Blair decided to prove her wrong. She would be brave and tell Chuck that she loved him again, and this time she wouldn't let him get away.
This time he genuinely seemed to want to say it after her little striptease, with a complete lovestoned expression upon his face, but damn cell phones & Gossip Girl ruined all of that. Her timing was the worst ever. Now Chuck knew about Jack as did Blair about Vanessa. Of course a mini argument ensued after the blow and Blair tried to fix the pieces.
She said it to him again. I love you. Four times to his face. And not once time did he say it back like she hoped he would. Even after she had told him that her love for him consumed her. He simply stared at her the whole time, obviously aching, until he slowly pulled her hands away from his face. In a low whisper, he answered her request. "Maybe it was. But it's not anymore." Her heart sunk at his words. She felt as though she wanted to die as he walked away from her. And that was when the tears began to fall.
Chuck felt as though he had a right to be mad. Didn't he? After all, it had been his uncle and she had never once told him. She had promised to stand by him through anything and she went off doing something like that? He felt sick at the thought. She had made mistakes just like him. How could she be mad at him? How could she call him a coward?
He traveled through Europe trying to forget about everything; her, them, New York, all the times that they had ever been together. But he failed. All he could see is her as he walked the streets. He ended up buying things that remind him of her; flowers, macaroons, a pair of stockings, jewelry. He felt conflicted.
It had been about a week. He couldn't decide whether to stop running or not. If he should even try facing her again. Because truthfully, all he had ever been doing is running away. From love, the truth, everything.
He didn't like facing things like this way. He preferred when he was in control and could manipulate the situation. He knew he could try using the gifts he bought to do that but he also knew there's only one thing that Blair has always truly wanted from him. It is something that he's never properly said out loud, not even to his father.
He has said it in a different form with it being 'her' instead of 'you' seeing as he's never gotten the courage to profess his feelings to the only girl he has ever loved and ever will. It scared him; the thought alone of being so open with her. Blair knew him better than anyone else (as did he with her) yet it seemed there was still so much that even she has to learn about him.
He sat on the flight back home, wondering what he'd say when he saw her again. He didn't want to just flat out say it because he knew she deserved even more than that. He had to do this right. But nothing came to mind. It had gone blank. He decided he'd let it come to him in the moment like he did the year before. He'd speak from the heart, as he should.
Of course she was hesitant once she spots him. He didn't mind because he knew she had good reason to be. He just continued to smile at her, trying to remain confident. She asked him why he was there. That was when he told her how she hadn't been out of his head that whole week. How she had always caught up with him. He saw that she was still uncertain so he moved on. He knew that he couldn't blow this.
He needed her to know that he loved her. That he was in love with her. So he told her the truth that this time it would be different, that she could believe him the way she had earlier that year.
"So that's it?" she asked with a slight smirk this time.
It's the moment. He knew it, and she knew it. It was inevitable.
Smiling, he finally said it easily. Like he had always said. "I love you, too."
With a sigh of relief, Blair closed her eyes and kissed Chuck passionately. Until she asked him to say it again. There was laughter and smiles breaking the ice. And with that, Chuck said it as many times as Blair asked him to and more.
Finally, they could both breathe again.
Later that night, Chuck whispered into Blair's ears as he held her to him in his arms. "You know, I'm not Chuck Bass without you, Waldorf."
Blair giggled. "I should hope not." She stroked his cheek with a grin. "God, I can't believe you how much I've missed you."
Chuck gave out a geniune laugh, relieved. "You can say that again." There's more laughter.
"So," Blair began, looking quite amused, "planning on 'doing it right' this time?" She stuck her tongue out, quite childishly.
Chuck looked at her completely serious this time, making her sure she knew that he wasn't lying. "Definitely." And with that, he kissed her with all his might.
A/N: The end. I'll admit part of my heart kind of broke while writing some of this. Anyway, hopefully you all liked the ending even though it might been a bit cheesy there. I always wanted to do something like this but IDK if I like it.
Also, I know I still had Chuck ditch Blair in Tuscany, and I know that some people won't like that. BUT in my opinion, (one of my fave writers on here LynniePearl, who has quit writing recently, made me start thinking this way months ago when I talked to her about it) Chuck not going to Tuscany was a good thing to a certain extent. It taught them both lessons. It taught Chuck the rules of a relationship in a way & it was to "make Blair be able to separate Chuck and Nate in her head. Or else she'd keep trying to shove Chuck into the 'perfect gentleman' box". But that's just what she told me word for word and what I agree completely with so... *shrug* Though I admit, I couldn't go through with making Chuck sleep with Amelia. But hey, the writers did leave it somewhat open to interpretation in a way. lol ;) And yes,
Anyway, I really hope you enjoyed this fic. Thank you all for reading/reviewing/adding it & me to your faves & alerts! I love you guys! Also, who knows what I'll write next but it will be something for GG again someday! :)
xoxo, Heather