Mckenna
To say the moon has power over me would feel like superstition, but to deny it would be a lie. Maybe it holds sway with all of us. Maybe McGoverns are just more sensitive to the power that commands the tide. For whatever reason, it calls and we answer. The clean brilliance invades my sleep, pulling me from the darkness, as surely as it pulls the ocean to the shore. Opening my eyes to the silver white light streaming across me through the window, I realize I'm back in my assigned bedroom at Grey's house, and I'm not alone. Turning my head to the corner of the room where that big cushy chair sits, I almost call out, barely catching the word before it leaves my lips. I take a deep shuddering breath, count to ten, and steady my voice, "Ana?"
The woman turns from her own contemplation of the moon, half of her still in shadow, the other half lights up in a smile, "Hi."
Such a simple greeting, and I'm grateful for it.
"Hi." Pushing myself up and reaching for the glass of water by my bed.
"How are you feeling?" Both of us vocalize the question at the same time. We then follow with simultaneous lies of, "I'm fine," This causes us to bust out laughing.
Ana recovers first, "Honestly, this time. I suffered a mild case of shock, but I'm good now. Dr. Greene assured us the baby is doing well. I'm tired, but that's a constant these days. Now, how about you?"
"Depends, I don't suppose you can tell me that the five minutes before I blacked out was just a hallucination, or something?"
"Well if that 'or something' is two very pissed off men, both demanding to see you, cooling their jets at opposite ends of this house, then sure, yes hallucination or something yep, you bet..."
"Shit!" I fall back on my very soft pile of pillows and cover my eyes, "I don't believe this. Those two idiots are going to push me to an early grave."
"Well, they won't do it from inside this room. Flynn was none too happy with either of them, neither was Christian for that matter, and the good doctor has put his foot down. They are not allowed to see you until you want to see them."
If only it were that simple.
Ana's gaze returns to the moon, "I can't imagine what it would be like. Christian was more than I cared to handle in the beginning of our relationship, and those two could match his intensity pound for pound, but then," She turned back to me, tilting her head in a way that reminded me so much of mom it caused my heart to twist, "So could you." She slowly pushes herself to her feet, "I'll go tell your sisters, you're awake."
"That would be great, thanks."
She crosses the room but pauses at the door, her hand on the knob, her head tilted so her forehead rests on the frame,"It's not over yet is it?"
My heart breaks a little for her, "No, I'm sorry it's not, but soon. I promise Ana, soon."
She nods silently and leaves the room.
Deciding putting off reality wasn't going to make it go away, I left the bed and headed for the bathroom. A hot shower, and coffee will improve my mood greatly, and help me cope with..whatever the hell was coming next. The clock by the bed read 9:48 p.m., but McGoverns don't sleep the first night of the full moon, so the caffeine wouldn't be a problem. It took years of frustrated sleepless nights before I admitted this weird little biological phenomenon applied to me. Scots are notoriously stubborn.
I was five minutes into the most extraordinary shower of my life, (Question: Just how many jets of water do you need hitting your body at one time? Answer- a hell of a lot.), when there was a polite tap on the door. Followed by Allie's signature huskiness.
"Mac, sweetie, there's fresh coffee and sandwiches, and Christy says she didn't drug you. You were just exhausted and needed the sleep."
I can't help my smile. I did wonder. "Right, I'll be out in a minute."
Emerging from the bath in fresh jeans and a long sleeve scooped neck tee, I have to admit I do feel better. My head-ache is barely a throb, my eyes, while still puffy and bloodshot, don't burn, and thankfully the hives completely faded. My sisters are spread out in the softly glowing lamp-lit room. Allie curled up on the massive bed, Christy in the reading chair, and Lena cross-legged on the floor, her Mac in her lap. All three have giant mugs of coffee. I walk over to the writing desk, that is now a buffet. Coffee, fruit, cheese, sandwiches, and a plate of small decadent looking pastries. Damn, it's enough food for a dozen people. Grey's work I'm sure. I pick up a delicious looking croissant filled with chicken salad, loaded with chunky white chicken, walnuts, and plump grapes. My favorite.
"Uh, Grey dropped off the tray a couple minutes ago." Lena's dry voice confirms my thought. "He also had specific instructions." My sister clears her throat and raises one eyebrow.
Oh, this should be good.
"And I quote: Tell your sister she is to absolutely not think about the case tonight. She will eat, sleep, and do exactly as the doctor instructs, or I will call your Aunt myself, tell her how ill she is, and offer the company jet to fly her here immediately, so she can be at her side."
I dropped my croissant. "Shit!"
"Yeah, that fucker plays dirty." Lena closes her laptop and gulps her coffee.
"I don't think he was bluffing either" Christy's eyes are wide behind her glasses.
"Hell no, he wasn't bluffing." The guy didn't get to be a billionaire at twenty-eight by not doing what he says. I pull the chair out from the desk and collapse into it. My knees are shaking.
"Well, I think you should eat something." Allie flicks her perfectly manicured hand at the banquet on the desk.
Oh yeah, I'm eating. I shove a cube of cheese in my mouth with one hand, pick up the croissant with the other, and take a huge bite.
"Damn, don't choke." Lena laughs. I just shoot her a dirty look. Granny Rose insisted on good table manners, and a lady doesn't talk with her mouth full.
"He's really smart, you know." Christy said, her voice thoughtful. "He knew exactly the one threat that would work."
Oh yeah, Grey was all about finding his opponent's weaknesses. Picking up a large, juicy strawberry with my free hand, I consider that, just possibly, I might have underestimated him.
Silence reigns for a few minutes, as I consume food at a rate that would have worried me if I wasn't already panicked. My sisters just observe in silence, ready to jump up and Heimlich me if needed.
After finishing off the entire croissant, a half a dozen strawberries, and I don't know how many chunks of cheese, my panic eases, and I'm able to sip my coffee at a completely normal rate.
"So do you want to know what happened?" Allie prods gently.
"No."
"Well, when you fainted, Gavin grabbed you and laid you down on that disgusting sofa." Allie informs me, completely ignoring my wish not to know.
"Then, Andre' started yelling," Christy jumps in, "mostly in Italian, but the gist of it was that if Gavin wasn't man enough to take care of you, he should just step aside and let someone else do it."
"Oh, for fuck's sake," I close my eyes and bring one hand up to rub my temple where the throbbing always starts.
"Yeah, you can imagine how well that went over." Christy went on, "Gavin bellowed like a bull, called him an idiot, and said he didn't like it either, but he knew you wouldn't leave now, and he wasn't about to tie you up, throw you over his shoulder, and carry you off against your will, cause he knew better."
Hell yes, he knew better.
"Then, um..." Christy hesitates, and lowers her head, studying her coffee.
Allie reluctantly takes back over, "Well, Andre' said something and Gavin kind of ...lost it..and uh... that's when Grey showed up, and we got him to take you out of there while Gavin and Andre' were sort of...distracted."
Uh-huh. "Why do I have the feeling you're leaving out some rather important details." I look back and forth between Allie and Christy, neither one will meet my eye. I shift my gaze to Lena, and there's a look on her face I've seen so few times, I can count them on one hand - sympathy.
Okay, so this is going to be bad. Horribly bad. Horribly, awfully bad.
"What?" I force the question through my lips.
Lena studies me silently. Her eyes give nothing away, but I know what she's considering, "No! No, don't you dare lie to me."
She half smiles at me then, "Man, you don't know when to let go do you?"
"Just tell me, Lena." Wearily, I bring the other hand up and rub my now fully throbbing head with both hands.
"Andre said," Lena takes a deep breath, focuses her eyes over my shoulder, and races through the words, "you seemed to like it when he tied you up"
My entire body went still, "What?" He wouldn't. Andre' wasn't exactly a gentleman, but he understands what being a McGovern means, knows what I gave up to him, he wouldn't betray my trust like that...
"Tell her everything." Allie whispers.
"He said, maybe the reason you liked it so much was because you were tied to his bed..."
...Or maybe he would. I feel something inside me, something small and fragile, freeze and shatter, the icy shards spreading through my body, freezing my blood.
"I think he would have said more, but Gavin," Lena's voice carries across the frozen tundra of broken trust engulfing me from the inside out, "I swear to you Mac, I've never seen Gavin like that, ever. His eyes turned black. He launched in the air like a giant missile and slammed into the guy. They went flying, through the door, and when I say through, I mean blew the door right off its hinges. They were airborne for two full seconds, then crashed in the middle of the precinct.."
"Huh?" I'm shivering, The hastily consumed contents of my stomach rumble up.
"That's when we left, but Sawyer said it took the entire 14th precinct to pull Gavin off of him." Lena 's eyes leave that spot over my shoulder, and seek my haunted ones, "He would have killed him, Mac. I recognized that look, right before he went airborne. Gavin fully intended to kill Andre'."
"Oh." It's all I can say. I can't feel my legs, or my arms, or my face, or anything. Dear Goddess, maybe I've gotten lucky and left my body. I move one leaden arm and pinch myself. The sharp pain sears my frozen skin. Nope, not lucky.
"Should we leave you alone for a little while." Allie's husky voice.
"Yeah, yeah I think so." I hear my sisters rise, followed by Lena's whisper in my ear, "Normally I'd go on and break something, but I know you care about the sneaky bastard so I'm going to leave it to you."
I think I nod. The room goes dark. I smell Allie's sweet perfume, and feel something soft drape around me. I pull it across my shoulders. It's the comforter from the bed. Then my sisters are gone, and it's just me, my shock, and the darkness.
I sat in that in that room, still and silent. The only movement, the tears that somehow kept falling from my eyes, running down my face to splash on my chilled hands. I had no idea why I was crying. I didn't feel sad. I didn't feel anything. My existence was nothing more than the moon and the frozen silence. I didn't hear the knock on the door, or the footsteps crossing the room, but suddenly, there was a snowy-white handkerchief in front of my face. Somehow, that made me smile, "Thanks." I take the square of crisp linen from Grey's hand and try wiping up the tears. It would be a lot easier if they'd stop falling. He doesn't say a word, just crosses the room to stand by the window, staring out into the night. Even in my current state, I can't help but notice how perfect he looks, as if he were created for the sole purpose of standing silently at that widow, while I sit and cry for reasons I fail to understand.
"The gunman's out of surgery. The police will question him tomorrow." His words fall peacefully into the moon bright room. He's talking about the case. Giving me permission to focus on something besides my confused state of misery.
I grab the distraction and hold on tight.
"Lincoln took out a bounty." I'm pleased, my voice, though little raspy, is surprisingly steady.
"A bounty?" he repeats, still looking out into the night.
"Yes, instead of hiring a single assassin, he took out a bounty or a contract, on Ana. Whoever kills her collects the money."
"How do you know this?"
"Short version, it's the only thing that makes sense. An explosion, a sniper, and then this guy. Three completely different methods. Two clean one sloppy..."
"I see."
"I can give you the long version..."
"Perhaps in the morning." I hear the rueful smile in his voice.
"Have you managed to cut off Lincoln's funds?"
"It's a bit of a process, but it will be done by tomorrow."
"Good." I nod, though he's not turned to see it, "It will flush him out. With the answers the gunman will give us, we can remove the bounty. Torril knows some...people. Probably why Auntie sent him." I feel my frozen lips attempt to smile, "Great threat by the way. I've never eaten so much so fast. My sisters were very impressed."
I can see Grey's answering half-smile in my mind, "I'm flattered." He's quiet for a moment, then,"so... your Aunt is involved with Catholic Charities, that's..."
"Ironic, implausible, ridiculous, impossible to believe?"
The half-smile in my mind grows to a grin, "Any and all of the above, yes."
"I know, believe me, but women breaking free from spousal abuse is something my Aunt feels strongly about, and Catholic Charities is just one of the groups with whom she works closely.""
"I see."
"Auntie's an enigma."
"She sounds fascinating. I look forward to meeting her."
Wow, he really means that. I take a moment to be impressed with his manners...and his courage, before picking back up on my train of thought, "It was a huge mistake. Going with a bounty."
"Yes," Grey said slowly his voice turning thoughtful, "I can see where that would not be smart. You have no control over your personnel."
"Exactly. The guy we caught is an ammeter, and a dumb one at that. Going for Ana the way he did was just plain stupid. And now we have him.
"Lincoln will have no resources. He'll be forced to come for her himself."
"And we'll be waiting."Even as I say the words, I hear a distant screeching note in my head, but before I can grasp it, it's gone. I bring my hand up, rubbing my temple, something's... off, but my brain's too tired to cipher it out. I breathe deep and let it go. As much as I hate to admit it, Grey's right, my weary mind needs a break. Trying to force it now, will just leave me frustrated and in pain
Once again, we fall silent, me wrapped in my blanket. Grey wrapped in moonlight. It occurs to me that, perhaps he needs this silence as much as I do. The man has borne stress that would crush most people and he's still standing. But he was tired, it's there in the slump of his shoulders, and the soft weariness of his voice. He needs some peace, and instead he has a house full of ….us. "Grey, I'm sorry about all this."
He turns slightly. I see just enough of his face to make out that one raised brow, "Sorry for what exactly?"
"Oh, hell," I manage to lift one frozen arm in a wild wave, "take your pick. My sisters showing up and wrecking your office, not to mention taking over your house. Jack up the chimney, scratching the hell out of you on his way down. My psycho back flashes. Stabbing your shrink, who I actually kind of like. I don't know how you're going to get the Trudy smell out of that mattress she's been sleeping on. And now these two idiots..."
"You're joking right?" The quietly posed question cuts off my rambling more effectively than a shout.
"Huh?"
"Mckenna, you came here when you were already ill, and have been literally torturing yourself to help us. If it weren't for you, we would be nowhere." Grey's turned from the window, fully facing me, jerking one frustrated hand through his hair, his voice rising,"We were nowhere, for over a month. You identified Lincoln in less than twenty-four hours, brought him back from the dead to do it. Lena put herself between my wife and a bullet. Christy, ..." he pauses, the hand coming out of his hair to pinch the bridge of his nose, his voice dropping to a horrified whisper, "Dear God, when I think what could have happened to her. She led a killer away from Ana, used herself as bait. And you – fuck!" the curse explodes from him. He raises his head, that one hand leaving his nose to slash through the air in my direction, his eyes flashing. Wow, he's upset. "If you could have seen how you looked when I picked you up off that filthy couch. You were so pale you were blue, except for the flaming hives all over your face and neck. I think you've lost at least five pounds in the last two days. If I were any type of decent human being I'd insist you leave..."
"I wouldn't go."
That earned me a snort, "Yes, well unlike Mr. McIntyre, I have no problem, knocking you out, tying you up, tossing you on a jet, and setting you down someplace warm, sunny, quiet, and safe, with lots of food, and.."
"Right, yes, okay...I get it." I wave him silent, then process his words, "Heard all that did you."
"Not first hand," Lowering his hands to his hips, he seems to calm slightly, that familiar half-smile lifting one corner of his mouth, "Sawyer was quite detailed in his account."
"Oh, I'll bet." I lean forward and rake both hands through my hair. The conversation has come full circle, back to the very thing I do not want to deal with.
"Hmm, well, I hate to broach the subject, but is there anything you'd like me to do with your uh...admirers tonight," Grey's voice is ripe with humor, I look up to see his lips twitching,"besides keeping them at opposite ends of the house?"
"Uh, I'm assuming taking a hammer and knocking them repeatedly in their ridiculously hard heads until you pound the stupid right out of them, is not an option?"
His answering chuckle tumbles around the room, warming the chilled air, "No, unfortunately not. "
"Yeah," I sigh under my breath, "Well, a girl can dream." I fall back into the chair and bring one hand up to rub my eyes, "I'll handle it."
"You don't have to do anything tonight."
"Yes, I do. I want this settled before the situation with Ana comes to a head, and besides I am royally pissed at both those idiots. If I don't get to scream at somebody I'll spontaneously combust, that would be messy, and we've made enough work for Mrs. Jones, what with Trudy's funk and Jack's furballs."
"Fine, yes then by all means, hunt them down and yell away." his gray eyes are twinkling, his lips twisting with the urge to laugh.
Distantly, I'm amazed that in spite of being surrounded by McGovern insanity for the last forty-eight hours, the man is still able to see the humor. That's just fucking remarkable. "So where are they?"
"Torrel is in the solarium, and I believe,"Grey pauses and turns back to the window, "that's McIntyre out there under the trees."
"What?" I drop my comforter, jump up, and run over to the widow, my eyes following the direction of Grey's hand. Sure enough, Gavin's massive body is leaning against on of those conifer trees, and even though I can't see his face, I know he's staring right at me.
"Oh, for fuck's sake." I turn around and slump back against the window, closing my eyes, suddenly exhausted.
"Mckenna," I open my eyes at Grey's serious tone, and find him studying me, "You do know he is hopelessly, pathetically in love with you."
Ah hell, not him too, "You've been talking to my sisters."
"Not about this no, but it's obvious." then, his eyes narrowing, "You can't be unaware of it."
Unaware – no. Wallowing in oblivious denial - you bet. I close my eyes and whisper the words I've never said out loud, even to myself, "He deserves better."
Silence greets those whispered words. I open my eyes to find Grey staring at me, his head cocked slightly to one side. The silence stretches into what feels like hours, but is actually only seconds. Through my fatigue, it hits me - this is look I give everyone else. Damn, I'm annoying. Then, understanding floods his features, "He wants you."
I look straight into his serious gaze, and whisper the truth that's haunted me over half my life,"I'm broken."
His features soften in a smile I haven't seen before, filled with compassion and something else...affection, genuine affection. I feel my eyes sting with an emotion I can't name as Grey reaches out, one hand clasping mine where it hangs, cold and limp, by my side."As are we all, Mckenna." It's a soft rueful whisper, his warm hand squeezing mine gently, before releasing me. His eyes shift and focus on a distant spot over my shoulder, the smile turning to a grin, "Ah, yes well, I'll see you in the morning."
He turns and crosses the room with his usual careless elegance. Right as the door clicks shut behind him, the glass I'm leaning against, buckles with sudden pounding. I scream like a sixteen year old girl in a bad B- movie, and jump about a foot in the air. My pounding heart clashing violently with giant fist pounding on the window. Taking a deep breath I turn and meet the determined face of a warrior set on conquest.
Oh, holy mother, this is gonna be a long night.
7