A/N: I'm dead to you, aren't I? xD. So i was speaking to KazukoMio, and we both realized that we're both at least one grade ahead. Our conclusion? Reading and reviewing fanfiction makes you smarter in school. Especially Harry Potter fanfiction, though Twilight works too! There are SO many people in my school, and I'm the only non-Egyptian, and Harry Potter fan. UGH. So I hung up a Harry Potter poster in the English department, and dug up the Harry Potter books in the library and sprawled them haphazardly on the tables xD

Anyways, here's a long-awaited WLM chapter =]

Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, I wouldn't be the only fan in my school ;D

-James Potter has logged on as PP

PB: PRONGS! MATE! HI!

PP: ..hi Padfoot.

JapaneseKoala: Daddy, save us. We're so BORED.

DragonFire: yeah, not even Little Miss Sunshine over here can cheer us up.

ScaryHarrry: we're not sad, moron, we're bored.

PB: hear, hear.

ScaryHarry: it's times like these I hate Hogwarts.

PP: why would you hate Hogwarts?

ScaryHarry: smushed Fred.

JapaneseKoala: when you say that, I sometimes wish Expelliarmus wasn't your ultimate spell and you actually died for once.

PP: Oi! Don't talk to your brother like that!

JapaneseKoala: Why? It's not like you can punish me for it.

PP: True, but Padfoot can! Padfoot, can you punish my daughter? ^.^

PB: heheh... melikes the way that sounds.. ;D

DragonFire: I'll punish her!

PP: this is a FAMILY affair. You are not family. Therefore, get your ghostly white ass out of this.

PB: well, as he is my second cousin, he's sorta family. Oh well. Every family has their black sheep! Actually, in this case, I'm one of the only 4 white sheep in the whole Black family. Andromeda, Tonks, that Uncle of mine who gave me 67279387 galleons, and me of course.

ScaryHarry: nobody cares :)

-Bellatrix Lestrange has logged on as DarkMistress

ScaryHarry: entertain us!

JapaneseKoala: Voldemort would TOTALLY want you to.

PB: This could be your big break! No more stripper poles for you! Isn't that tempting?

DarkMistress: what tempts me is my shoe up your nose. Ugh, I'm so BORED.

DragonFire: don't you have something to do at the manor?

DarkMatron: we sorta lost our sense of humour after the Dark Lord recovered from the whole love potion thing. It was worth it, though! And i still catch him singing that stupid Hey There Delilah song every now and then.

PB: i'd love to hear him sing!

-Hermione Granger has logged on as Microhard

-Ginny Weasley has logged on as DesertRose

JapaneseKoala: Oh, thank Edward. Guys, we're bored.

Microhard: so are we.

DesertRose: Depressingly.

PB: so who's Edward?

JapaneseKoala: if I answer that, you'd be so confused it hurts.

DragonFire: we're bored enough as it is... give us a shot.

JapaneseKoala: okay... It's Cedric Diggory existing in a regular North American suburbia, with no British accent and a Muggle gf who sounds like a man. The catch? He's a Vampire.

ScaryHarry: My mind's too bored to process that.

DarkMatron: fascinating. I'm so BORED! Kill me!

DesertRose: Don't worry! Mum will, soon enough =D.

-Daniel Radcliffe has logged on as PotterStar

*: HEY! DANIEL! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING HERE?!

PotterStar: being hot (H).

ScaryHarry: hey! Isn't Daniel Radcliffe the bloke who exposes me to the Muggle world?

*:yes, he is. How'd you know?

ScaryHarry: because I'm scary Harry (H).

Microhard: who are you, anyways?

*: I am the owner, creator and publisher of WLM. You're not supposed to know me, but someone doesn't belong here.

PB: and J.

JapaneseKoala: That was so freaking helpful, Sirius.

DarkMatron: will the Black family ever be normal?

DragonFire: I wouldn't count on it.

DesertRose: basically, you're a stalker.

Microhard: wicked.

PotterStar: well hello Miss Weasley

DesertRose: EW! THE MUGGLE IS FLIRTING WITH ME! WHAT DO I DO? WHAT DO I DO?!

PP: shh, shh, young daughter in law. It's alright. It won't hurt you.

DragonFire: so...uh...where's Tom Felton? I hear he's quite the chav.

PotterStar: pickin' up babes at some bar. The usual.

PB: this Tom character appeals to me.

DarkMatron: GAH! Dark LORD! G2G2G2G2G2G2G2!!!!!

-Bellatrix Lestrange has logged out.

PotterStar: aww :(...I didn't even get the chance to pick on her... (U).

PP: it's all good. We'll send her to work at some dinghy Starbucks. You can pester her there 

PotterStar: HEY DAD!

ScaryHarry: HEY! I don't know who you think you are, Mr I'm a Hollywood star who's making more money than people with real jobs, not some Broadway porno people are only watching because you play me, but go screw your white horse.

*: Harry, in the Muggle world, we have this thing called anger management. Would you be interested? Or would you like to try therapy?

Microhard: and there's my personal favourite: the asylum! ^.^

*: right. Radcliffe, you're gone. Buh-Bye.

PotterStar: why?!

-Brittany Penger has logged on as Britadcliffe.

-Kayla Marshons has logged on as DoMeDaniel

-Jennifer Greelet has logged on as MRSDR

-Austin Noble has logged on as Gay&Rad

*: because of that.

ScaryHarry: wtf? How come HE gets fangirls? I'M the real Harry Potter!

DragonFire: did anyone notice that the last fangirl was a guy!?

JapaneseKoala: oh, come on. Radcliffe's not that hot.

DesertRose: ugh, gross.

Britadcliffe: EW! IT'S GINNY! DIE, YOU FAT UGLY HORSE, DIE!

DesertRose: I am a witch.

DoMeDaniel: you're a bitch.

*: YO FANGIRL! We don't swear in here.

PB: ...uh...yeah we do. Like, 24/7.

Microhard: yeah, but we can do whatever we desire. We're wizards :).

PotterStar: but I'm Daniel Radcliffe! I was naked on Broadway! Don't I deserve something?

MRSDR: I'll give you whatever you want, baby.

DragonFire: this is disgusting. Where are Tom's fans?

Gay&Rad: EWWWWWW! Tom's got like, THE biggest acne problem ever. His zits have their own zip code. There are life forms on him deformations. Acne treatment companies are trying to get him to sign contracts for him to use their products.

DesertRose: HAAAAAAAA! Lol.

JapaneseKoala: I was this close to saying poor Malfoy, but then I realized that it was Malfoy!

DragonFire: but he always looks so clear and handsome in the movies. Is he a wizard?

Brtiadcliffe: no, silly! It's all make up! Tommy uses more makeup than a bride on her wedding day!

ScaryHarry: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

PP: sounds exactly like young Malfoy here.

JapaneseKoala: yup. Fake beauty.

DragonFire: Beauty is a gift.

JapaneseKoala: a gift you haven't been given.

Microhard: YOU JUST CALLED MALFOY BEAUTIFUL!

PB: eww! You're in love with Malfoy! Serra and Malfoy sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

DoMeDaniel: does this make the way clear to Sirius? =]

Gay&Rad: yes! One fangirl down, 398740198098189725908 to go! Though, none are as worthy of Daniel as I am.

PotterStar: ugh, Serra, darling, I'm afraid that won't work. My sister can't be in love with my enemy. It's just not right, see.

ScaryHarry: she's not your sister, idiot. She's mine, and she's not in love with Malfoy. Besides, the epilogue says Malfoy's wife. That's it. No name, no description, nothing.

Britadcliffe: I thought it was Pansy Parkinson

PB: 's disease xD

DoMeDaniel: I LOVE YOU DANIEL!

Gay&Rad: I am gay for you, Daniel. Clearly, I love you more.

MRSDR: My love makes everyone else's look like hate! Pick me!

Britadcliffe: like, I'm hot, you're cool. We complete each other.

PotterStar: whoa, whoa! Since when was I picking someone, Jennifer?

MRSDR: LIKE, OMFG! HE TOTALLY JUST SPOKE DIRECTLY TO ME! LIKE, WOW! I'M TOTALLY MYSPACING THIS AS WE SPEAK!

Microhard: white girl outlet.

DoMeDaniel: omg, just like, die already, Hermione. You're a total frizz.

*: I've had enough of this.

All 3 girls and 1 guy died, because Harry didn't believe that his representation should have fans. He should.

PotterStar: HEY! You killed my fans, you vile woman!

DragonFire: technically, Potter did.

Microhard: but wrote it.

PotterStar: DOESN'T MATTER! YOU'RE ALL BLOODY MURDERERS! May you all drown in pools of misery and angst.

PP: try swimming in a pool other than the airheaded one.

PotterStar: enough of this! I have topless women to look at in front of the world! BAH!

ScaryHarry: and horses to hug.

Daniel Radcliffe suddenly went on a rampage and flung his laptop all the way to the Hannah Montana set, where it exploded. ^.^

*: there you go! Now you can enjoy good, wholesome discussions without any interruptions :D

-Candy Siamabaum has logged on as Hot4Dan

-Melina Loins has logged on as MeloPots3

-Janice Fitch has logged on as JanieHarry

-Alexis Stokes has logged on as POTTERGIRL

DragonFire: , please kill them all.

JanieHarry: OMG WE HEARD DAN WAS IN THIS CHAT ROOM!

POTTERGIRL: like, where is he?!

MeloPots3: my eyes lost their virginity to him!

Hot4Dan: HOW COME DAN ISN'T ON THE LIST?! OMG! HE'S NOT HERE, IS HE?! And, wtf? Why's Hannah Montana cancelled?

PP: wow. And here I was, thinking Snivellus was the most pointless birth ever.

PB: never thought that theory'd ever turn out to be wrong.

Microhard: welcome to the Muggle world, where the only point of existing is reproducing.

PB: where do I hand in my resignation from the Wizarding world?

ScaryHarry: Sirius, shut up :)

Hot4Dan: OMG! IS THAT REALLY HARRY POTTER?! OMFG!

Microhard: no, silly girl. There's no such thing as magic.

JanieHarry: Aly&AJ think there is.

MeloPots3: there was fully a magician at my kid sister's birthday. ."

Microhard: you know what? Fine. Whatever. I'm leaving before my mind starts melting and coming out my ears.

-Hermione Granger has logged out.

DesertRose: what kind of spells did the magician perform?

MeloPots3: they don't do spells. It was....amazing. He pulled a rabbit out of a hat. Like, how cool is that?!

DesertRose: WAIT UP HERMIONE!

-Ginny Weasley has logged out.

DragonFire: that's not magic, you simple Muggle girl. That's pointless crap.

JapaneseKoala: sorta like you, Malfoy =]

POTTERGIRL: you're very mean, Serra. Did you know that?

*: I will not have people insulting the object of my passion, understand?

This chat room has been inaccessible to all Muggles.

ScaryHarry: that was smart.

PP: Aren't you a muggle?

*: I am a species of my own. O0o0o0o.

PB: I'm scared now:( I'll just leave..

-Sirius Black has logged out.

PP: like, bigfoot or something like that.

JapaneseKoala: do you have any superpowers?

ScaryHarry: can you do anything amazing?

PP: ARE YOU AN INCREDIBLE?!

JapaneseKoala: dad, stop watching muggle kid movies. Kay?

PP: NO. Madagascar 2 is coming out and i MUSSSSSSSSST see it, even though i haven't seen half the first one.

ScaryHarry: our question wasn't answered. Where's ?

JapaneseKoala: dude...maybe she's trapped in a limbo between life and death. Like you?

ScaryHarry: oh, no, they have internet there. They have everything there! And this weird bay thing that was actually Voldemort. Reminded me of a mandrake, really.

PP: i am way beyond grossed out.

-James Potter has logged out.

JapaneseKoala: well, i'm most certainly not staying to chat with my brother.

-Serra Potter has logged out.

ScaryHarry: hey, ghost. I have a question.

Ghost: shoot.

ScaryHarry: did all that just happen? Was i indirectly ambushed? Did i meet my ultimate stalker who's a species of her own and has no superpowers?

Ghost: whatttttttttttt? Harry, baby, you need to lay off those WWW products, man. They're no good.

ScarHarry: huh. K. Well, thanks, bud!

-Harry Potter has logged out.

*: oh man. He's so gullible

Ghost: i know. I fail to see why Voldemort didn't just tell Harry he had to kill himself in order to survive. You know he would've done it

*: oh, well. It's all JK's fault, anyways. Peace out!

a/n: hahaha that was so anal. Anyways, I finally updated. Yay! I'm so tired. It's like...8:30 xD PLEASSSE PLEASSE leave me a review. If you don't, i most certainly will not update any time soon. I'm aiming for 25 reviews, please! I must have 100. I MUST! xD it's not hard. Personally, i've reviewed every single story i've ever read. All i had to do was click the 'go' button, write 3 words, and that's it. I can make an author's day by just typing a few words. Make my day too, please? Lol i'm fully begging you xD AND I NEED IDEAS REALLY BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD! BAAA! SHEEP!

Also, in the unlikely event that Daniel Radcliffe or Mily Cyrus read this, I mean no harm whatsoever, just having a little fun. Hell, I watch Hannah Montana when I think nobody's looking xD And Equus is a really meaningful play. I'm just a pessimist xD Furthurmore, I have NOTHING against fangirls. I'd be a total hypocrite if I did. And if someone's named turned out to be Candy Siamabaum, then LOL. Nice to meet you xD AND HOMOSEXUALITY IS A WAY OF LIFE. I AM NOT HOMOPHOBIC IN ANY WAY.

Visist The Twisted Life of Lily Evans. I'm helping write that one; it's my VERRRRRRRRRRRY goot amigas' story, and it's unravelling really well!

TACOS, PICKLES, GOATS AND CHUBBY KIDS,

;D