Disclaimer: I don't own any of the songs that I use in this story, except the songs I wrote my own (which I will mention then)
A/N: One small author's note: Sky's thoughts are in italics so pay attention to that. Sensitive people… be careful!
"I need to talk to you. About the auditions."
Chapter XIV: Unwanted
"Okay. Are there problems with the hours, 'cause I can always change my schedule and… by the way what did you say 5 seconds ago about 'my masculine body'?"
"I saw Marisol coming out of the linen cupboard and I accidentally heard a few words of your 'conversation'" That came out harsher than I expected. He looks at me, hurt, sad?
"Well I can do whatever I want to with whoever I want to." He says
"Off course you can; see if I care!" I almost yell. He looks at me, surprised that I even yelled.
"Okay then, I don't care if you care either so…"
"We're clear." I complete his sentence. We're so not.
"We're clear" he repeats, yet there's something in his eyes… missing
"So about the auditions; I can't dance with you anymore."
"You can't dance with me anymore? What do you mean, we haven't even started!" he says frustrated. "Tomorrow is our first training!" there he goes again: training. I sigh; 'cause I really don't want to tell him, but he's going to find out anyway so… Oh boy, he continues
"You know, I don't understand you girls. What the hell is wrong with you?!" he says, raising his voice. "Now tell me, tell me what the incredibly important reason is that you cannot dance with me?" he practically shouts
"I can't dance with you 'cause I will dance with Joaquin at Alfea's summer Party. But you can dance with Marisol." I say, looking at him, waiting anxiously for a reaction. He pulls me forcedly into the ladies room.
"What's wrong with you?!" I yell
"No." he says "What's your problem? I mean, everything was going just fine and then you came along!"
"Well I'm sorry! I just said I don't want to dance with you 'cause I want to dance with my boyfriend. What a shock to you!" I say sarcastically
"I won't let you dance with him anymore. Damned, why don't you understand?!" he asks, slamming me against the wall. God, she's so beautiful, even when she's angry.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I scream. She's right; what am I doing? What's wrong with me? Why can't I just let her go?
"Shh" he says "Or someone will hear us and you know what they think of a girl and a boy together alone in the girls' bathroom." He says out of breath. He does have a point there. I calm down. She gets back to normal, pulling up those walls again.
"Get of me!" I say angrily
"Oh right" he says, saddened and lets go of my arms. Suddenly I realize we're standing very close to each other. There's just this thing, there' something…
"Everything is messed up." He says, closing the space that was between us "All because of you." He strokes my cheek. What the hell? Actually it's kinda sweet. No, no!
"Because I…" he starts but I cut him off.
"What are you doing?" I take his hand. He's so nice but "You can't do this!" I continue, on the verge of tears now.
"Bloom, no don't back off now. You know it. You know what I…"
"I… I can't do this" she interrupts me again, breaking my heart at the same time. I kiss him softly on the lips but when I realize what I have done, I pull away quickly, looking horrified.
"Oh God!" I say, covering my lips with three fingers. "No, no!" I shake my head and turn around to walk away, yet he's still holding me.
"Bloom, come back!" Damned I'm so close, I can't just lose now! All I want to do is kiss her, touch her, hell even just talk to her. Okay, did I just say that? No, I just want to kiss her.
"No!" I repeat, more to myself than to him. Tears are now freely coming out of my eyes. I pull the door open and run away. Away from him, away from myself, away from us… I leave everything behind in that moment. Everything.
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You could be happy and I won't know And all the things that I wished I had not said Is it too late to remind you how we were Most of what I remember makes me sure
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go
Are played in loops 'till it's madness in my head
But not our last days of silent screaming blur
I should have stopped you from walking out the door
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Am I such a bad person? That I ruin his hope? That I run away from him? It's not like I didn't get hurt by it, 'cause God it stings in my heart. So damn deep. But I can't. Love just never works out with me; I'm all messed up and I don't know love. I'm not stupid, I know Joaquin doesn't love me; he wants me, but he doesn't love me. Yet he gives me love and attention and I can't ask for more 'cause I have given up hope already. And it's not because some cocky prince just appears, that I change my mind about the whole love thing. Love is bullshit. Perfect love doesn't exist; perfect dancing doesn't exist. It's better if you don't dance with two persons; it's better if you don't love with two people.
You know, Joaquin always reminds me of something; of a song. I sing it quietly, and think about him.
she'd do anything to sparkle in his eye - But why? Why do I want him to be happy?
she would suffer, she would fight, and compromise - Why do I hurt myself for him?
she's been wishing on the stars that shine so bright - I can't have love though I have wanted it.
for answers to the questions that will haunt her tonight - So why?
she must rinse this all away - I have to get rid of him
she can't hold him this way - He's no good for me
she must rinse this all away - He's not like me
she can't love him this way - I could never love him
"Wow" I hear him clapping his hands "That was really good. Is it yours?"
"Off course it's not." I snap "It's Vanessa Carlton's."
"Never heard of her." He just says. Is he trying to make clear how different we are?
"Joaquin" I sigh "I talked to Sky and…"
"Who?"
"Sky! The boy who wanted to dance with me has a name. Sky." How could he be so rude?
"Oh. What did he say?"
"Well, he refused." I say, afraid to look at him. When I do look at him I see how furious he is.
"What?!" he screams "What did he say?! I will go change his mind then!"
"NO!" I yell, more fiercely than I meant.
"Oh and who would stop me?" he asks arrogantly. He looks at me. "You!" he says unbelievingly.
"What?!" I yell not-understanding
"Are you in love with him?"
"What? Joaquin I don't know what you're talking about!" he grabs my wrist, hurting me
"Oh no indeed you don't. Maybe you want to, but you can never, you're tied to me." he says, while his eyes remain closed.
"Let's dance." He says since we are in Alfea's rehearsal.
"This is not the time Joaquin." I say "I don't feel so good." I let him know and turn around to leave. He's still holding my right hand and now touches the ring he gave me, burning it into my flesh.
"Aw!" I exclaim "Don't do that!" he looks into my eyes. "Fine, I'll stay."
"Good, I have a way to remove the pain" he says and starts kissing me. Soon, we're making out on the stands of the rehearsal room and I feel he wants to go further, I feel he's pushing me and strangely I feel I don't resist until I feel a hand creeping under my blouse, trying to lift it. First of all, this blouse has buttons, so then you use the buttons, second of all
"I don't want this." I calmly say
"Come on Bloom! I have waited for what; a year?"
"Well you can wait a year longer since I am not ready for this." At least not with you!
"What did you just say?!"
"What? I didn't say anything."
"You just said 'At least not with you!'!"
"No I didn't!"
"But you thought it!"
"Joaquin what are you doing? Stop manipulating me! And God, stop invading my mind!"
"Oh so there's someone else you would allow. You don't think that prince would want you 'cause Nympha, he just wants a good lay and that's it. There's no one but me."
"I don't want him. Haven't you figured that out yet?! And I don't want to have this conversation."
"Why not? Why don't you want to have sex with me 'cause I'm sure you would have sex with any other guy. You are just another slut!" I slap his cheek and a reddish burn appears on his face.
"Oh, déjà-vu." He says. I just look at him
"You crossed the line." I say and try to get up, while he still holds me
"You didn't think I was going to leave it that way did you?! Do you think I'm stupid? I've put up with you long enough to get something in return, something I've wanted all the time."
"Joaquin leave please, you're scaring me" I say, frightened
"I don't think so" he says and pushes me down forcedly
"Joaquin no! let go of me!" I say but he cuts me off by kissing me violently. I try to push him, kick him, say spells but I can't; it's all pointless while he keeps violating me. Suddenly I can't take it anymore and he gets of me 'cause he burnt his hands.
"Oh, so that's your power. Fire" he says with an evil grin. He looks at me intensely, as if he's hypnotizing me and to my astonishment his eyes have become red. They turned from pitch-black to deep red. I look at him in horror. He's putting a spell on me again. He looks at me again.
"Well, this is nice." He says "Now you can't resist too much. You can push and pull a little, but not enough; you will try, but you will never succeed. As always" he says. But I can still yell!
"HELP!" I shout but he shuts me up my kissing me again. I struggle, but that only seems to turn him on even more. I feel he's touching me everywhere, but I can't do anything and it's killing me. I don't want this. He's already pushing against my body though he hasn't even gone into me yet. I start to look around terrified but off course no one's here and nothing here can help me. He's unbuttoning my blouse hurriedly by ripping the buttons of and I start to cry silently.
"Now, now don't cry" but I can't help it "Stop!" he yells angry and puts his hand on my throat, almost choking me.
How did I get here? This is not me. I am strong. Hell I'm going to be queen of Sparx. I am supposed to be queen. He's kissing my naked stomach and goes up until he reaches my bra. He wants to untie it, but he's too hasty and he's not able to untie it so he gets even angrier and hits me in the face; once, twice,… He rolls my skirt up. Oh God. He's going to rape me.
A/N: OH GOD! Why do I stop here?! What's my problem?! She's so dead right now! What's her problem?! She's going to be raped! Oh God now! This isn't finished pumpkins, so keep reading and the people who are extremely shocked right now: don't read that part!
I put a few songs in it because they were just perfect for this.
You could be happy by Snow Patrol --/ From Sky's POV; the lines in bold and italics-- why are they in bold and italics? Can anyone tell me that? It's really easy! Let me now!
Rinse by Vanessa Carlton -- / I put Bloom's thoughts next to it, okay?
Review review unless you want Bloom ending up sexually assaulted. You're the only ones who can save her. Many reviews mean better ending though don't expect too much since it will still be dramatically but hey maybe you guys can convince me!
Bye!
xD
