A/N: Hello again everyone! I'm back with another new chapter!

Before we get started, I would like to thank everyone that read last chapter! I would also like to give a huge thank you to winterschild11, Side1ways, Guest, XxxAnimaniacxxX, and RainbowDiamonds for reviewing!

I hope you all enjoy!

James was grateful for the break in tension. It had been exactly what they'd needed. They spent the next couple of hours chatting with people, drinking, and just having a good time. It was nice to watch Kendall.

There were people Kendall knew from when he was a kid and whom he hadn't reconnected with yet. His Adam's apple bobbed each time he laughed. He moved his hands often when he spoke, James noticed. It wasn't something he'd taken the time to really pay attention to before.

Kendall was animated, a people person. The second part he knew. It was one of the things that had drawn him to Kendall in the first place.

They spent some of their time together, and there were times Kendall would sneak away. James had a feeling it was for his benefit, and while he appreciated it, he hated it, too.

He was doing this wrong, he thought. Was there a way he was supposed to do this? Really, there couldn't be. Everyone played by their own rules, but he felt off, as if he was doing wrong by Kendall even though they seemed fine. They were acting like everyone else at the party...like people who were getting together to celebrate a birthday.

Maybe the guilt had more to do with what was going on inside his head. He would have to come out as something...more than once, likely. And at this point, right now, he wasn't ready for anyone to know.

Part of that was because he wanted to protect it, wanted something he shared with Kendall and Kendall alone. He was afraid it would get ruined, that opening it up to more people and...well, real life would damage it, but he knew he couldn't protect it forever.

That was only part of the truth, though; the rest he wasn't as proud of. This changed everything, who he thought he was, and while he'd known that from the moment they started, it was different being laid bare that way for others to see.

"Boo!" Hands squeezed James' waist, and he jumped. Fucking jumped.

"Wow...someone's spacing off." Logan smiled at him.

Just thinking about Kendall, the guy I'm seeing…

"Asshole." He winked at him. "The party seems to be going well." He nodded towards Carlos, who was doing some kind of chicken dance while holding one leg up.

"Yeah...we don't get out often."

James chuckled at Logan's joke. They turned and leaned against the wall, watching the people around them. Logan let his head rest on James' shoulder. "I'm exhausted. Surprise parties are a lot of work."

"It's mine and Kendall's first. We'll keep that in mind. We're planning our next one."

"For who?" Logan asked.

"We're not sure yet. We'll let you know when we figure it out."

"You guys are dorks." He pulled away and rolled his eyes. "The two of you have gotten close. That's nice."

He'd be lying if he didn't admit his muscles went a little tense at that. Had he made it obvious? It's mine and Kendall's first. We'll keep that in mind. We're planning our next one. He'd spoken about the two of them like they were some kind of package deal. But then...he sort of felt like they were. He wanted to be a package deal.

Christ, his brain was spinning tonight.

"He's a good guy." James settled on.

"I figured he was. You are, too."

"Aww, thanks."

They were quiet again for a moment. He couldn't help but wonder what Logan was thinking. Did he wonder if he and Kendall were more than friends? How would he feel if he did?

"So…" Logan started just as James heard, "Hey, what are the two of you doing over here?" in a voice that made warmth spread through his chest and a smile pull at his lips.

Kendall.

"Nothing. Just hanging out. We're not as popular as you." James teased.

Kendall rolled his eyes. "I'm not popular. I'm a novelty because I'm back and no one knows where I've been."

That made James frown. He didn't want Kendall to feel like a novelty. "Whatever. People like talking to you because you're easy to talk to. Don't sell yourself short."

Well, that's awfully nice of you, Sweet Tooth."

James saw it as it happened-Kendall's hand rose, reached for him, touched the side of his face. The moment he realized it, James felt the jolt go from Kendall to him. Kendall jerked his hand back, his eyes wide in a horror that James hated he had to feel. That he had to be so nervous about anyone seeing them together because of James. It was all him. Not Kendall.

"Oh, hey, Logan! There you are." A voice sounded from beside them.

A woman stepped up beside them, her brunette hair pulled back in a ponytail. She was beautiful; James knew that. Just because he didn't feel attraction to someone didn't mean he didn't know when someone was beautiful or not.

His eyes caught Logan's, and he could see the confusion there, the questions.

"Hey, Jennifer. Listen, I-"

"Who's your friend?" Jennifer cut Logan off. She held James' gaze, and his gut twisted.

"Um," Logan started. He had a feeling this was all supposed to happen. Not the Kendall part, but the Jennifer part. He saw it in Logan's questioning stare. Heard it in his voice.

"James." He reached out and shook Jenifer's hand. "I'm James, and this is Kendall."

"Well, hello, James and Kendall." She said, but she was looking at James the whole time. Logan's "So…" from the second before Kendall approached them came back to him. "Logan said you're a mechanic, right?" She asked, confirming they'd spoken about him.

"Um...yeah. I work with Dak."

James let his eyes find Kendall, and he could see the strain in his jaw, could see the pain in his eyes. It didn't take a genius to see what was happening here, and Kendall saw it. Jennifer had wanted to be introduced to him. Logan had agreed, but now he likely realized it was a mistake.

"Will you go grab a drink with me, Jennifer?" Logan asked. Jennifer's brows pulled together.

"I think I'm going to grab one." Kendall replied, and James frowned.

"Hey...where are you going?" He realized the question sounded ridiculous since he'd just said he was getting a drink.

"To get a beer." Kendall replied, and that easily, he walked away.

Every curse word James could think of swam through his brain. He was pissed at Kendall for walking away. Pissed at himself for putting them in the situation where Kendall thought that was the best thing to do. He was even pissed at Logan for agreeing to introduce Jennifer to him and at Jennifer for being interested, when he knew he didn't have the right to be.

"Listen, I'm going to head out. Tell Carlos that Kendall and I said happy birthday, Loges, and it was nice to meet you, Jennifer." He frowned in confusion, but Logan just said okay before James was making his way through the crowd of people.

He knew Kendall hadn't gone to get a drink, so James went straight for the door. By the time he made it to the driveway, he saw Kendall standing there, hands shoved into his pockets, with his back to the house.

James felt the sadness roll off Kendall, surround him. It matched what James felt, too.

"I'm sorry." Kendall said when James reached him. It was a reflex...touching you."

The apology rubbed roughly against James' skin, but he couldn't blame Kendall for it. He was the one who made Kendall feel as if he had to apologize for something like that.

"I'm sorry for making you feel like you can't."

Kendall sighed. "I shouldn't have walked out like that...with Jennifer. Did I make it obvious?" He asked. That question split James' heart.

"I don't know and I don't care." But part of him did. At least right now.

"Yeah, you do, but you're working on it. I know you are. I should have been more careful, and I shouldn't have stormed out like that. It was childish. I know you, and you wouldn't have led her on. You would have found a way to get out of the situation."

Yes, he would have...but he understood how Kendall felt, too.

"If our positions were reversed, it would have bothered me too, Kendall. Please tell me you know that. I wouldn't have been able to see anyone flirt with you either."

Kendall looked at him. It was dark, but the light over the garage shined down perfectly on Kendall.

"Yeah...yeah, I know it." Kendall responded, but something about the soft tone of his voice told James it was a lie.

"I'm serious."

"You ready to go home, Sweet Tooth?" He asked, and James sighed.

"I'm ready to go home."

They didn't touch or say anything else as they went.

They were quiet as they drove home.

Quiet as they walked into the house.

Quiet as they made their way upstairs.

Kendall wasn't proud of the way he'd reacted at the party. It had been immature. So Jennifer had been attracted to James. Big deal. She hadn't known James was taken...if he considered himself that.

He mentally chastised himself for the thought. Of course James did, didn't he? And he also knew how James worked. He wasn't the kind of man who would have just disappeared with a woman he had literally just met, though he knew James' life would be easier if he was. James had to know that too; he had to wish it was his reality.

"I think I'm going to take a shower." Kendall said.

He was pouting, pouting and feeling sorry for himself. It wasn't a good look on him. In the grand scheme of things, tonight hadn't been that big of a deal. Anyone knew relationships came with challenges, with mistakes and feeling your way around.

"Okay." James nodded. He sat on the bed and began removing his shoes. "I'm welcome in here tonight, right?"

"Of course you are. I want you here."

"I want to be here." And that helped. They had shit to figure out, but that statement made him believe they were in it together.

Kendall smiled, then went into the bathroom. He kept the door open slightly before slipping out of his clothes, turning on the water, and getting in.

He put his head under the spray, letting the water run over his head as if it could wash away his thoughts, his doubt. He was falling hard and fast, and that scared the shit out of him.

Kendall picked up the soap, washed his body and then his hair.

He didn't want to be in the shower without James. He wanted to be our there with him.

Reaching over, he turned off the faucets just as the shower curtain opened. James was there, in nothing but his underwear and holding a towel.

"You're always taking care of me...touching me...spoiling me. I want to do that for you."

"I like touching you." Kendall replied.

"I like it, too. Now come here and let me dry you off."

Kendall smiled. That sounded real nice to him. He stepped out of the shower, and James wrapped the towel around him.

"Turn." He said; then dried Kendall's back, between his legs, and down to his feet. "Turn around again." James told him, and Kendall obeyed. James dried his hair, his chest, his arms, stomach, and knelt to dry his cock, which had begun to harden. "It's still so new to me...seeing a man like this. Seeing you like this. I'm sorry I'm not better at it."

"Hey." Kendall hooked his fingers under his chin and tilted it up. "You're doing great."

James didn't answer. Instead, he reached out to touch Kendall's erection. "Your body is amazing to me. It's just like mine...but different. I look at you, and my pulse goes haywire. My blood gets hot, rushes through my body, and I go out of my mind. Like you take me somewhere else."

"Fuck." Kendall trembled. "That was hot as hell."

"You know what you do to me, don't you? What you make me feel? That it doesn't matter to me that I've never been attracted to a man before. What matters is how I feel about you and…"

"And what?" Kendall gasped out, James' fingers whispering up and down his erection.

"I want you all the time...and it's more than just physical. It's everything else, but right now...right now I really want to make love to you, Kendall. Show me how to make love to you."

Kendall's body started buzzing, vibrating from the inside, like he could burst out of his skin. He wanted that. Fuck, he wanted it.

He pulled James to his feet, their mouths slamming together. He tasted beer on James' tongue.

James groaned into his mouth, and Kendall swallowed it down. His hand slid to the small of James' back as he walked him toward the bedroom, toward their bed. It felt like it was their bed now, not just Kendall's-it belonged to both of them.

When James' legs hit the back of the bed, they stopped. James' mouth slid down Kendall's neck, his throat, so that he dropped his head back and let James kiss him. His hand traveled down Kendall's back, to his ass, where his fingers teased Kendall's crease.

"I don't have to show you anything, Sweet Tooth. You're doing just fine on your own."

"Good." James smiled against Kendall's skin. He felt it there and fucking loved it. "I want to make you feel good."

"You will. I've been dying to have you inside me."

"I've been dying to be there." James countered.

"So we're basically saving two lives tonight."

The two of them laughed as they so often did together.

"I guess we are. Now get your ass on the bed." James smacked Kendall's right cheek.

"Ooh. I like that. Nothing like a spanked ass."

"Really?" James' brows pulled together.

"Really. Maybe we'll try it sometime. Right now, I just want you in me." Kendall lay down on the bed, while James grabbed condoms and lube. He tossed them to the bed before pulling his underwear off. His cock was so fucking hard that it made Kendall's mouth water. "That fucking dick. I can't wait feel it."

James put one knee on the bed, then the other, before crawling toward him. "Feel. That's what you make me do. You make me feel everything a million times more than I do without you. Even if I'm not ready to go public yet, I want your hands on me all the time. Your eyes, everything. I really hope you know that."

Kendall's heart damn near burst. He opened his mouth to reply, but before he could, James silenced him with a kiss that he felt a million times more than any kiss he'd ever had.

Kissing Kendall was one of James' favorite things. He loved to taste him, to feel him, so that was what he did. He lay there, on top of Kendall, and they just ate at each other's mouths, nibbled each other's lips until they were both writhed, sweating, groaning masses of limbs and need.

"God, you kill me, Sweet Tooth." Kendall told him as James kissed down his chest and tongued his right nipple. Kendall's hand fisted in his hair. James loved knowing he made Kendall go so far out of his mind, because Kendall sure as hell did it for him.

He wanted Kendall to know that. Wanted Kendall to know how much he craved him, how much he desired him, but outside of that, he wanted to give himself to Kendall on a level he hadn't yet. To share himself.

"Jesus, you feel good. I need you, though. Wanna feel part of you inside me." Kendall said as he tightened his hold on James' hair. "I need you inside me."

A jolt of desire shot through James. He loved it when Kendall talked to him like that.

"Let's get you ready."

"You wanna watch me first? I know how much you like it. I'll finger myself, get myself nice and ready for you."

James trembled. He wanted to do that, to get Kendall ready, but he wanted to see it, too.

"Just for a minute, then your ass is mine."

They both chuckled at how cheesy that sounded.

He handed Kendall the lube. He squirted some on his fingers, then spread his legs. James settled between them, out of the way, as Kendall rubbed the pad of his finger on the tight ring of muscle.

"Push your finger in. Let me see it open up."

"Bossy, bossy." Kendall replied, but he did it. He pushed his finger in, and James watched his tight hole swallow it up again.

"Fuck, that gets my dick hard. It's so goddamn sexy watching you touch yourself."

"Yeah...I like it when you watch me, too." Kendall added a second finger, fucking himself on them. He moaned, gasped, and wiggled his ass like he was in fucking love with something inside him. James couldn't wait for it to be him.

"Christ, your sexy. I can't get enough of you. Turn over. I want to play, too." He leaned back on his knees to give Kendall space. He did as James said, rolling so he was on his elbows and knees, ass in the air.

James knelt behind Kendall, lubed his fingers, then rubbed two against Kendall's rim. It hit him then that they were here, together, and how there wasn't anywhere else he'd rather be.

"You're incredible." James told him.

"I didn't do anything."

"You didn't have to." He pushed his finger in, then another-twisting them, pushing deep and then pulling them out again. He watched Kendall's hole open up for him, prepare for his cock, and Christ, he wanted to know what it felt like inside him. "I want you. God, I fucking want you so much."

"I'm right here, Sweet Tooth. Take me. I want to give myself to you."

Those words landed in James' chest, maybe meant more than they were supposed to. James thought he wanted it all.

He eased his fingers out before grabbing the condom and preparing himself. Once he was wet with lube, he leaned forward, kissing Kendall's shoulders as he pushed his way inside.

He trembled, paused, and shuddered again. "Fuck...it's so damn tight inside you." He only had the head in, but he couldn't move. "Christ, I might die. Fucking hell, I can't believe how hot you are."

"Give me your cock. I want it. Jesus, I fucking want it all." Again, it felt like Kendall was talking about more than sex, and it was at the tip of James' tongue to return the sentiment...but he couldn't...not yet.

So instead, he pushed the rest of the way inside. He already on the edge and ready to burst. It was like a tight fucking fist around him, only better because it was Kendall and he was inside him. Inside a man. Inside the person who meant the fucking world to him.

"Jesus." James groaned, and then...then he couldn't hold himself back anymore. He pumped his hips, held Kendall's ass cheeks open with his hands, and watched his dick disappear inside. Watched it pull out and then shove deep again. It was fucking beautiful. Kendall was beautiful. Each and every sound he made vibrated through James. Reached him on a deeper level than he knew was there.

"Yes...fuck yes, you feel so good. So goddamn good. Keep going."

James couldn't stop if he wanted to. But as sexy of a picture as it made, seeing himself fill Kendall, he wanted something else, too.

"Can you ride me? I want you to ride me."

"Fuck yes." Kendall replied, then lay down so James' cock slipped out.

He grabbed James, twisted him, laying him down in a swift movement. Then he was there, straddling him, grabbing James' cock, and lowering his ass over it.

Tight.

Hot.

In-fucking-credible.

"Yesss…" James hissed as Kendall impaled himself on James' cock. And when he started to ride, when his hips rocked and his insides slid up and down James' cock, his vision blurred. He was nothing but color, felt his body quiver and tingle and damn near burst.

James used one hand to grab Kendall's hip and dug his nails in before fisting Kendall's cock and starting to jerk. Kendall's eyes rolled back, then closed.

"Right there. So good. Keep jacking me, and fuck, you're hitting the spot."

James thrust, railed into him, trying to keep fucking Kendall like he needed, to keep reaching that spot that made him lose his mind. He cried out when Kendall's hole tightened around him, when the first shot of Kendall's release hit his chest, the other landing on James' mouth. Damned if he didn't lick it away.

"Jesus, that was hot. Watching you lick my load off your lip."

James felt a rush of heat as his orgasm slammed into him, washed over him as he let go, saw color, and came apart beneath Kendall.

They lay there, panting hard, holding each other, sweating together, and this moment...it was everything. He realized then how much this man meant to him, what this moment and every single moment they had together meant.

But somehow...somehow it wasn't enough either. He needed to give Kendall more, needed to give him the deepest, most scarred parts of himself. And know that Kendall would do his best to help ease those wounds.

Done! So...yeah. :P

I'd love to hear your thoughts on the chapter, as well as if you happened to have a favorite part/moment!

Again, I hope you all enjoyed! Next chapter will pick up where this one left off, so you'll get to hear/read James sharing his story with Kendall. That will more than likely be up sometime this weekend, early next week at the latest.

Until then! :D

-Epically Obsessed