Chapter 13: Any Chance(Teardrop)
Rikku screeched and bolted up in bed. Paine practically "popcorned" out of her bed, knife in hand. Her eyes scanned the dimly lit room. When she found no intruder, she sighed and looked at Rikku who was still sitting up but had pulled the covers up over her nose. Paine grimaced and slowly walked over to the younger girl.
Rikku lowered the covers a little and smiled, she laughed nervously as Paine sat down on the bed next to her and sighed. She stared down at the bed, "You know what I've been thinking about?" she asked.
Rikku shook her head, "No."
Paine nodded. Before Rikku could even register it, Paine had her hand around her throat and was pressing her onto the bed. The cool blade of the knife traced her cheek, "How easy it would be to just . . get rid of you. It would make my life much easier." she leaned down, dangerously close to Rikku's face. "You do this again, I'll shove something a lot worse than a knife down your throat."
Rikku nodded slowly. Paine smiled sweetly before standing and going back to her bed and laying down, "Good." she said. Rikku sat back up cautiously and watched Paine suspiciously, "Oh, and uh, sleep well." she said, smiling as she slid the knife back under the pillow and patting the cushion to emphasize the proximity of the blade to her hand.
Rikku, wide-eyed and now fully awake, collapsed backwards onto her bed and laid with her arms splayed out to the sides. She took a breath and thanked the Fayth that she had survived her near death experience.
Paine on the other hand once again cursed the fact that she had to share a room with Rikku. She traced a finger down the cool metal of the knife, taking a shaky breath as it brought back memories of her past. Memories that she had forgotten until Yuna showed up.
In truth, her appearance was a mixed blessing. On one hand, she had awakened feelings in Paine that the warrior had long ago shut away. She had cut herself off emotionally from the rest of the world. She had preferred that, and had been somewhat happy. She had suppressed many memories that were too painful to have in the back of her mind, even though she knew that eventually they could eat away at her and destroy her.
On the other hand, Yuna had yanked Paine out of her comfort, out of her little built world, and back into the harsh light of reality. It had burned instantly. The flood of memories, the overwhelming storm of emotions. It had been like a migraine. The sheer intensity that life seemed to take on. Every feeling exploded, combining with a memory that scorched her and confused her. She had felt so lost. She hadn't known what to do. She was experiencing emotions so foreign to her, so utterly alien.
And then like a bolt from the blue the realization had hit her. She had been in love. In love with Yuna. And in truth she could not have been more shocked, more frightened, or more thrilled. She had noticed something about Yuna from the moment she met her. Her kindness, her inner strength. She was beautiful in so many ways.
And now Paine felt like she had betrayed the one she loved. She had turned her over to Fayne. And even though what he was doing would save her, it would be at a price. Paine had hated the training. It had been invasive, painful, and at times frightening. She had constantly questioned whether she would emerge with her whole mind.
Or even emerge at all.
According to Fayne, though, it had been easier for her thanks to her bloodline. Her fucking bloodline. Paine took very little pride in being the descendant of Daceon. Other living Fayth seemed to think that that immediately made her some kind of hero. It disgusted her. She had yet to do anything to warrant being remembered. She wanted to carve her own path, not walk her ancestor's.
In any case, at least Yuna was supposedly powerful. The stronger you were, the easier the training tended to be. And according to Fayne, Yuna could be more powerful than even he was. That gave Paine some solace for two main reasons. One: It meant that the training would be that much easier for her. Two: It gave them a huge advantage over the Followers.
Of course, Yuna was a pacifist, so she might not even use her powers to help. It also hurt Paine to think of Yuna like that. Like she was a weapon. Just an object. Merely an advantage. Like she wasn't a person with free will and morals. If she didn't want to fight, she wouldn't have to. Paine would see to it.
She almost laughed.
She had become so protective of Yuna so quickly. She wondered if it was pathetic. If it meant she was growing soft. Then again, it could also show how much she loved Yuna. It showed that she truly cared for the girl. Paine wasn't used to that. It unnerved her, but at the same time, it thrilled her.
*******
Yuna was standing on a mountain.
Cold, harsh wind battered her. It bit her, stinging her exposed flesh. She curled up against the stone as she looked warily at the precipice so close to her. She was so near the edge. Unconsciously she still pushed away from it, though her body would go no further.
She heard something familiar. The sound was like a breath, like the tinkling of a bell, something ethereal and unnatural. Looking up, towards the top of the mountain, she saw two orbs of light circling slowly round the peak.
One was black. A rusty trail of wicked light drifted behind it. It sounded like roars, not screams or wails, but horrid, angry roars. They shook her to her core, and they traveled through the stone of the mountain.
The other was white light. It was a brilliant, glittering sight. Like light refracting through a thousand crystals did it seem. The sounds of a holy choir echoed from it. Its tail was golden, and its sound traveled through the air, filling the whole of the sky and the spaces between the mountains, while the dark one filled the solid earth with its terrifying power.
The two veered from their circling course and danced daintily through the air before colliding. The result was catastrophic. The mountains shook, huge chunks of stone slid from the ragged daggers and slammed into the ground. The tiny cliff Yuna was on cracked and slid down a fraction.
Yuna screamed.
Child!
The familiar voice yelled. It was both anguished and enraged. It seemed to echo from all around her. Yuna screamed again as the cliff gave way and she was sent down the side of the mountain to a rocky grave, all the while the voice roared with an inhuman sorrow.
*******
Yuna awoke with a start. She was gasping for air, her eyes danced wildly about the room as her brain screamed. She was covered in sweat and tears were soaking her cheeks. Her gasps turned to choked sobs as she tried to rid her mind of the horrifically realistic nightmare.
The pounding she had thought was her own heart turned out to be her door. She limply slid off her bed and stumbled blindly through the dark towards the door. She opened it to find Paine, eyes wide and nervous. Yuna immediately threw her arms around the warrior, her need for comfort being met as Paine put an arm around the brunette.
Yuna buried her face in the crook of Paine's neck as she sobbed. Paine, seeing no threats in Yuna's room, assumed it was a nightmare. She began to rub Yuna's back and whispered that she was alright.
Slowly Yuna's sobs faded to just weak shakes and shallow breathing. Paine led Yuna slowly back into her room and, closing the door behind her, laid Yuna down in her bed. She sat on the edge of the bed and stroked Yuna's hair as the smaller girl began to calm down.
Yuna had gripped Paine's free hand in both of hers. She moved as close as possible to the warrior, relishing the comfort of another human with her. Finally, Yuna stopped crying altogether. Though she was still shivering.
"Sorry." Yuna whispered hoarsely. She was still holding onto Paine's hand and relaxed her grip a little.
"Don't be." Paine said softly as she lightly tangled her fingers in the girl's hair.
Yuna shook her head, "I woke you up, probably some other people too." Yuna said miserably.
Paine chuckled, "Actually you didn't wake me up. Along with all the other people Rikku probably woke up not too long ago with that shriek of hers."
"What was her nightmare?"
Paine shook her head, "I don't even wanna know."
Yuna nodded, "Still. I feel like a little kid, getting all worked up over a silly dream."
Paine laughed, "With the way you were screaming, I'd say you have a right to get worked up." Paine's hand slowly moved down to Yuna's back. Her fingers pressed gently against the cloth as she moved her hand in a circular motion.
Yuna bit her lower lip and shifted. Now that she had a chance to think about it, now that that force was no longer in control, she was beginning to have doubts about her trues feelings towards Paine. Of course, that might have just been because it was somewhat unnerving. To experience emotions for someone, for another girl, so quickly. She found it hard to accept so quickly. All she knew was the rush of emotion she felt. But anything deeper? She didn't know how strongly she really felt for the warrior.
But despite the doubt, and ignoring the initial fear, she knew she felt something. While she didn't know if it was love, there was definitely something there. There had to be. She wondered, though, if she was imagining that. If it was just her hoping that she did for Paine's sake. She realized how difficult it had to be for the warrior. It would affect her, of that Yuna was certain, how badly she didn't know. Though she was sure it would be bad. And she wouldn't be able to live with herself for doing that to Paine.
And then there was the side of her that somewhat hoped she didn't love Paine. Even though it was a cruel thought, she had a reason: Rikku. Her cousin loved Paine. She had known her for much longer than Yuna had. She truly loved the warrior. Rikku had confided her feelings to Yuna. She trusted her. And Yuna had, even if inadvertently, betrayed her.
And she cursed herself for it.
Paine noticed the movement and removed her hand slowly. She turned her eyes away from Yuna and murmured, "Are you gonna be alright?"
Yuna swallowed, "Yeah." she nodded. Paine was about to stand when Yuna placed her hand over Paine's again. The warrior's skin was cold. Yuna intertwined her fingers with Paine's. The tips of the warrior's fingers were callused and rough against the back of her hand. Yuna squeezed Paine's hand and muttered, "Thank-you."
Paine looked down and briefly caught Yuna's eye, "No problem." as she stood, Yuna let her grip slacken and her hand fell away. Paine walked to the door and laid a hand on the latch, "Goodnight."
She left silently, leaving Yuna alone in the dark. She drew her arm into the bundle of blankets she was curled up in and closed her eyes. All she could do was hope that the nightmares stayed away. So that for just a few more hours she could forget what all was happening. So that for a sew more hours, she could just rest.
*******
Rikku yawned. As always, the quick and unnatural switch from subconscious to reality disoriented her. Her face was halfway buried in her pillow, both hands slid underneath the cushion. She was laying flat on her stomach. She pulled her hands out and pushed herself up, blinking in the light.
The Nek's wake-up system was irritating. As it got brighter outside, the lights inside brightened as well. She got somewhat used to it after a year or so, but it still managed to piss her off in the morning. She tried to move her legs, but was surprised to find that they were stuck. She cursed silently and turned to head to find that her legs were tangled in her blankets.
She tried to kick her legs loose, but found that that method was completely useless. She finally resorted to manually disentangling herself. After a minute or so of pulling, tugging, and twisting, she finally managed to free herself.
She let out a triumphant, "Hell yeah!" and then clamped her hand over her mouth. She looked nervously at Paine's bed for the first time and found that the warrior was gone. She sighed and jumped out of her bed. When she had first started working with Paine she had been a little disappointed that mornings were normally lonely, but she got used to it. She was rarely alone anyway, so she would usually take this time to think.
Not that she never did, it's just that this was a time when she could think more clearly. And she didn't always think about Paine. Her mind occasionally wandered to the war. Well, the war with the Followers to be more precise. Sure she couldn't help but sometimes think about the war between Bevelle and Zanarkand. The two world powers had always bickered in the past, but there had only once before been a full-blown war. The outcome of this war would definitely effect the world. It would decide whether Bevelle would remain in power as it had for up to fifteen-hundred years, or the newer and more unpredictable Zanarkand would rule Spira.
Either way, she still considered the war with the Followers to be much more important. She had been told about the Dark Fayth and the living Fayth. She knew who Daceon was. And she was just happy that she got to fight in the more important war. Who cared about changing governments when the Fayth were being threatened?! Also, as an Al Bhed, she didn't care which power was in control. The Al Bhed hadn't bowed to Bevelle's empire, and they wouldn't submit to the black armies of the Polemarch either.
Still, the most important thing to her was Paine.
*******
Paine found Yuna on the deck.
She had checked the galley first, but found that the brunette wasn't there. She doubted she was still in her room, but she still checked anyway. The deck had been her third choice.
It was still early, and the sun was barely up. The water glistened with crystalline elegance. Light sparkled and danced brilliantly off the shifting surface of the ocean. A few clouds dotted the sky. They drifted lazily and were spread thin, as if even they didn't like having to wake up. A cool breeze moved over the deck, carrying the scent of the ocean with it. Paine wondered if Yuna missed the scent of Besaid. It's tropical environment, rich plant life.
Yuna was leaning against the edge, her arms folded on the wooden barrier separating her from the waters below. Her eyes moved slowly, taking in all aspects of this new, landless world. She heard Paine's footsteps and sighed.
She had tried to block out the thoughts from the night before by thinking about the new training she would have to go through. Not surprisingly, that turned out to be just as difficult to think about.
Paine mimicked Yuna's position, careful to give the girl some space. She didn't say anything, she didn't think she should. She may have been sure about what she felt, what she wanted. But she didn't know if Yuna was.
"Are there always traits?" Yuna asked. She wanted to speak, but was too nervous to say what she really wanted to.
Paine didn't move her eyes from the water, "What do you mean?"
"Is there a way to tell who's a child of what Fayth?"
Paine tilted her head, "Well, anyone of Daceonic descent has red eyes, sometimes silver hair, but not always. Every living Fayth in our line has the eyes, though. But yeah, every Fayth has a particular eye color that shows who belongs to them. An example would be that a child of Bahamut would have one eye with a black iris, the other would change color constantly. Ifrit's children have eyes that look like fire. Literally their irises flicker like flames."
"So who am I a child of?" Yuna asked.
Paine paused, "I . . I don't know. I've never heard of one having one green eye and one blue eye. Of course, sometimes eye color doesn't show through until after training."
"So mine might change?"
Paine shrugged, "It's possible. But they may not. It all depends."
"Were your eyes always red?"
"Yeah. Same for my sister."
Yuna sighed, "Paine I . ." she stopped, she shifted her arms and gripped the top of the wall, "I think I need your help." she said. "I'm scared to death right now. Everything is so confusing, I'm not even sure about half of what's happening right now! First my home is attacked, I'm kidnapped, I'm told there's a war going on between two armies I've never even heard of, and now I'm the child of a being that isn't technically even alive!"
Yuna took a shuddered breath and closed her eyes. Paine wasn't surprised that the girl didn't cry. Paine smiled, "You don't need my help, Yuna." the warrior said. "You're strong. You're taking this better than others have." she said. She didn't mention the other issue. She was starting to wonder again if there was any chance of Yuna loving her.
Yuna opened her eyes and looked up. She didn't say anything at first. She just looked out over the ocean. Her mind went back to Paine. Back to how she felt about her. She too wondered if there was any chance. She just wasn't sure. She couldn't tell whether or not she did. She just didn't seem to be able to go that deep.
But there was still a feeling towards Paine. More admiration than love. Yuna lingered on that feeling, but it wasn't too deep. She let it go and looked over at Paine. The warrior was staring out over the ocean again.
Yuna straightened and walked the short distance to Paine. She laid a hand on the girl's shoulder, "Thanks." her hand fell back to her side and she started for the door leading into the ship. "I'm going to get something to eat." she said over her shoulder.
Paine nodded absentmindedly. She watched Yuna walk away and then looked down at her hands. She clenched her hand into a fist and then relaxed it. A clear drop of water fell onto the back of her hand. Paine stared at the droplet for a moment before realizing it was a tear.
She raised a single hand to her cheek and felt a trail of water close to her eye. She lowered her hand and took a deep breath. Yuna was right, things were very confusing. For Paine, it was mostly the hurt, and the anxiety building in her.
Was there any chance?
Author's Note: Okay, there's not going to be a break in the story until very close to the end of Yuna's training, so don't worry about that. But after Yuna's training ends there will be significantly more breaks in the story as the mainland war will begin to become much more important as more characters are introduced. Thanks to all who've reviewed so far!
Thank-you for reading.