Thankee to Reviewers! Thanks to everybody who speculated on the difference between Hits and Views... It seems like nobody actually knows for sure... Does anybody know or is Fanfiction just playing with our minds?

Kaili's back =) And just as adorable as ever (or so I hope)

I don't own Bleach. If I did there would be a Phantom of the Opera and a Wicked Witch of the West. Oh yes, there would also be a sorting hat, a few more werewolves and Trisana Chandler. Because Tris is the BEST and who doesn't like werewolves and sorting hats? Also, the opening songs would be songs from Nightwish, Marianas Trench, Within Temptation, Cadle of Filfth, and/or Evanescence.

If you don't know what I meant by sorting hat... I'm hoping that you just temporarily forgot. Just to refresh your memory, think HARRY POTTER! Yeah. It's awesome. If you don't know who Trisana Chandler is, I'm not surprised. I feel quite bad for you though. You're missing out. Read Tamora Pierce's 'Circle of Magic' and 'Circle Opens' books, and then you'll understand. If you don't know about any of the bands mentioned above, YouTube them! They are awesome!

... Right. On with the story.

Renji paused, staring at the odd procession passing them. Ikkaku and Yumichika were carrying Kenpachi in between them, stumbling a bit at his weight. Yachiru was sitting on Kenpachi's stomach, bouncing up and down and chattering in a loud voice.

"Okay!" Ikkaku growled. "Who gave her candy?" Renji had to fight not to burst out laughing.

"What's up?" he asked, falling into step beside Ikkaku.

"We're getting the Captains out of there," Ikkaku replied.

"Some officers want to continue the game of tag from last night," Yumichika continued. "You need to go get your Captain. I highly doubt that he can walk."

"When we were there he was on the ground, moaning in pain," Ikkaku said. "None of the Captains can walk. Soi Fon was being carried out of there by What's-His-Face from eighth. The third seat. She's going to be pissed when she wakes up."

Renji laughed. "She is. See you!"

"Bye," Yumichika and Ikkaku chorused.

"Buh-bye funny tattoos!" Yachiru called, waving.

Renji made his way to the Rec. Room, passing Isane, who was supporting Unohana. The usually calm captain was giggling maniacally and kept on poking the side of Isane's head.

"I hope she snaps out of it," Isane groaned. "This is really annoying." Renji stared at Unohana.

"I'll bet." He agreed.

"But at least I don't have Captain Kurotsuchi. I feel really bad for Nemu," she continued. "He's screaming at the top of his lungs and keeps on slapping her over the side of the head." Renji winced. "Kiyone and Sentaro are carrying Captain Ukitake out, and Iba's dragging Captain Komamura behind him while Captain Komamura barks at him. Nanao has to support Captain Kyoraku. She said that she's really worried about him because he's not trying to grope her like he usually does."

Renji frowned. "… I kinda feel bad for Nanao."

"She doesn't mind really," Isane replied. "She likes him back, she's just afraid to admit it. Alright, alright! Yes, we're going!" That last part was directed towards Unohana. "Sorry," Isane told him wearily. "I have to go before she… what was it? Oh yes. Cuts my head open and eats my brains for dinner."

"Isn't that typical zombie behaviour? Is she turning into a zombie?"

"I sure hope no- Ow! Fine, we're going!" Isane gave him a shy smile. "Bye Renji."

"See you," Renji replied. He managed to reach the Rec. Room without any more confrontation from delirious, unconscious, or just plain unreasonable captains. When he got there, he saw that Ikkaku and Yumichika hadn't been exaggerating. Byakuya was lying on the ground, clutching his head as though he was afraid it was going to split open.

"Captain?" Renji asked. Byakuya moaned, and curled into a tighter ball.

"Ow…" Byakuya whimpered.

"Right." Renji bent down and scooped him up, nearly falling over backwards. He hadn't expected his Captain to be that light! Byakuya nestled his head against Renji's neck, and clutched his shirt tightly. (I give up on trying to name the robe things. It's just going to be a shirt from now on.) "Want to tell me what happened?" Renji asked.

"Uh uh. I think I'm dying." Byakuya whispered, sounding as though he meant it.

"I sure hope not," Renji told him, starting to walk towards the tent, where Kaili was waiting. He was trying hard not to think about how his Captain's body was pressed against his, or about how he could feel Byakuya's breath against his neck. "That would be… unfortunate." Byakuya whimpered again, and to Renji's abrupt discomfort, snuggled closer to Renji's chest. I really hope that Kaili's willing to surrender her blanket, he thought. Byakuya's skin was like ice and he was shivering.

When Renji reached the tent, Kaili was sitting outside, drawing pictures in the dirt. She looked up when Renji approached, and waved to him cheerfully.

"I made Captain Kuchiki a little fort," she informed him, beaming. "Cuz I figured he'd need it. I saw Captain Hitsugaya. He didn't look so good. Rangiku was carrying him, and he was screaming and crying like a toddler. He said something about cookies…" Kaili shrugged. "I made it out of all of the blankets. You can have yours back when you go to bed." Renji grinned down at her.

"You are the sweetest person that I have ever met." He informed her, ducking into the tent. Sure enough, there was a little nest of blankets and pillows in Byakuya's corner of the tent. He gently set the smaller man down, and began wrapping the blankets around him.

"Did he puke?" Kaili asked, following Renji in.

"Twice," Renji replied. It had not been a pleasant experience. "He hasn't eaten anything today though, so nothing came up." Kaili patted Byakuya's head.

"Poor Captain," she murmured, before lying down on her stomach, staring up at Renji. "You should take his ponytail out. He always sleeps with his hair down."

"He's not exactly sleeping," Renji muttered.

"You should still take it out." Kaili insisted. "It isn't comfy sleeping with your hair up." She tugged at one of her slightly crooked pigtails. Renji stared down at his Captain warily. He didn't want to touch the other man again, for fear of the odd warmth that traveled up his fingers and into his neck and face and stomach when he did. It wasn't unpleasant, but Renji couldn't quite categorize it, which made him wary. He followed Kaili's instructions anyways, since she was right. It wasn't comfortable to sleep with your hair up. He had done it. It made your head hurt. And since Byakuya looked as though he already had a headache, Renji figured that he didn't need another one. Carefully, he undid the hair band. Byakuya's hair was silky and smooth against his fingers, and once again Renji felt an odd heat in the pit of his stomach.

What is this? He wondered as he carefully placed Byakuya's hair band down beside him. And why do I like it?

When Byakuya woke up, the first thing he was aware of was how much his head hurt. Well, all of him hurt, but his head felt the worst. And he was cold. Very, very cold. And slightly nauseous. He bit back a groan, and slowly opened his eyes, meeting green ones.

"You're awake," Kaili said simply, leaning back. "Renji went to get something to eat." Byakuya pushed himself into a sitting position, tugging the blankets back up around him. He didn't really care that they were somebody else's blankets- he was freezing.

"Cold?" Kaili asked him. He nodded. "It could be worse. We think Captain Unohana might have turned into a zombie. She keeps on threatening to eat people's brains."

"Not anymore," Renji said, crawling into their tent. "Now she's just in a really bad mood. Or at least, according to Isane, she's not acting like a zombie anymore. Do you want something to eat Captain?"

"No. Thank you," Byakuya said quickly. The very thought of food was enough to make his stomach turn over. Renji shrugged, and handed a plate to Kaili.

"Captain Hitsugaya's still having a temper tantrum though. Apparently he didn't want cookies after all. Komamura is still growling at everybody. Captain Ukitake screams 'shut the fuck up' at anybody who tries to speak to him, and Captain Zaraki and Captain Kurotsuchi are having an argument. I think it has something to do with who hates who more…" Byakuya had carefully rested his aching head on his knees, which also ached, but in a different way, while Renji had been speaking. Now he lifted his head again.

"They're still fighting?" he asked.

"They've been going on for a long time…" Renji sighed. "It's beginning to get a bit tedious." Byakuya let his head drop again. "Captain Soi Fon is also screaming at everybody, but it has something to do with 2012 and a zombie apocalypse."

"Wonderful," Byakuya grumbled. "She's still on that."

"What's 2012?" Kaili asked.

"The year the humans think the world is going to end." Byakuya replied.

"Oh…" Kaili said. "That's dumb. You can't predict when the world's gonna end."

"What happened?" Renji asked. Byakuya looked up again. Both Renji and Kaili were staring at him expectantly. Byakuya rested his forehead on his knees, and told them exactly what had happened. Well, the parts that he could remember.

That's it =)

Review please?

-Stormy

Tris: "I was reading."

Sandry: "You're always reading. The only way people can ever talk to you is to interrupt."

Tris: "Then maybe they shouldn't talk to me."

— Trisana Chandler and Sandrilene fa Toren

Briar's Book- Tamora Pierce

I don't own Tamora Pierce either... This is a quote from one of her books in the 'Circle of Magic' series.