Covering the Famous Host Club!
"Next week's edition is going to be the last paper of the first semester. It's no secret that our club isn't doing that well, and if we don't turn it around soon, Principal Sampson's going to shut us down. Frankly, I don't care if the club goes under, because I already fulfilled my extracurricular credits. The only reason I decided to supervise this club was to help you out, but I can only do so much. It's all up to you whether the club stays alive or not. Keep in mind that this is the only chance that you'll have to earn your requirements, considering that you've been rejected from every other club in the school," Ken sat at a big, leather office chair.
"But that's not fair! We're trying our best!" JP pleaded.
"It's not our fault nobody wants to listen to us," Ivan glumly said.
"Yeah! Give us a break!" Takuya whined.
"That stupid host club doesn't do anything either, and nobody picks on them! What the hell? It's not like we're twiddling our thumbs all day, so why is Sampson picking on us?!" Kouki slammed his fist on a tabletop.
"Calm yourself," Ken sharply said. "We must have sold some papers."
"Yeah, four! I bought a copy, did you?" Takuya said.
"Yep," JP nodded.
"Yeah," Kouki rolled his eyes.
"Of course! That newspaper makes for some great kitty litter. Yoshi-chan's still not trained yet," Kouki said.
"Don't look at me. The newspaper's a waste of money," Ken said.
"Gee, thanks...," JP frowned.
"Great! So nobody outside of the newspaper club actually bought an issue? For crying out loud, our own president didn't even buy a copy!" Kouki growled.
"What? I have a restricted allowance, so I don't want to blow it on something crappy, when I can get something like...this!" Ken pulled out a yoyo and started to play with it. "Here's the cat's cradle..."
"Cool, it lights up!" Ivan said in awe.
"So pretty...," JP oohed.
"Legen-wait for it...dary!" Takuya said.
"Hullo?! What about the pressing matters?!" Kouki slammed his hands on Ken's desk.
"The Newspaper Club has been around for about 43 years," Ken gently put his yoyo down. "Back then, everyone read the school newspaper, but now, readership has hit an all-time low in the last five years. With all of this technology, especially the social networks, nobody's interested in getting their current events in a crummy school newspaper when they can just read it on their friend's message board," Ken said.
"Yes, just keep telling us how this newspaper club's headed straight to hell!" Kouki growled.
"This club isn't going to survive with a bitter attitude like yours. Instead of criticizing me for pointing out the harsh realities, why don't you come up with an idea that could save this pathetic coverup of a club?" Ken said.
"We're not a coverup of a club," Takuya pouted.
"Then what are we? What does an ex-juvie, a friendless loser, a fat new kid from a private school, and a guy like me have in common?" Ivan sighed.
"That we're all pathetic?" JP guessed.
"Hey, I don't care if you call yourselves pathetic, but leave me out of this!" Kouki growled.
"I just got a great idea!" Takuya beamed.
"What is it?" Ivan asked.
"How about we write a cover story on the Odaiba Host Club? That way, we can find out what those guys do without looking nosy!" Takuya said.
"Why do you even care about what that stupid host club does?" Kouki made a face.
"Well, they are the newest club in the school," Ivan said.
"If they're anything like the host club at my old school, they must also super popular. I bet everyone loves them," JP said.
"Pfft," Kouki rolled his eyes.
"Think about it. If we put that host club on the cover of our next issue, just imagine how many people would buy it!" Takuya said.
"I knew you guys weren't as stupid as everyone said you were," Ken smiled.
"Uh...thanks?" Takuya rubbed the back of his head.
"Who called us stupid?!" Kouki yelled.
"Mimi, you did it again!" Tai said.
"Yeah! What better way to kick off the holiday season than to sell calendars for charity?" Sora said.
"I must admit, collaborating with the photography club is a pretty cost-efficient method to raise as much money as possible without worrying about the expenses. By splitting the costs halfway, now both clubs are able to donate to their preferred charity," Izzy nodded.
"Not only that, it gives Mimi a chance to cosplay...," Sora raised an eyebrow.
"Alright! December's our group shot! Everyone, hurry over in front of the camera!" Kari said.
"Coming!" Tai sang. All of the host club members and Zoe dashed over in front of the camera. Kari pressed the timer button and posed along with everyone else.
"Ten...nine...eight...," Kari said through her teeth.
*knock knock*
"Sorry, but host club's closed for the week!" Tai yelled.
*knock knock knock*
"We're closed!" Tai barked.
*knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock*
"Seriously?" Tai scrunched up his face.
"Just get the door," Izzy sighed.
*FLASH*
"Aww man! You guys moved!" Kari ran over to the camera. "See? It came out terrible!"
"Ew, ew, ew! Delete it, delete it, delete it!" Mimi shrieked.
"What can we do you for?" Tai leaned against the doorway.
"Hi," Ivan bashfully waved.
"We're the newspaper club," JP said.
"We have a school newspaper?" Takato asked.
"Yeah, but no one ever reads it. It's full of boring stuff like interviews with the lunch lady and that ongoing story about the dirty sock that's been on the boy's locker room floor since last spring," Davis shrugged.
"If that sock's been lying on the floor for the past several months, then why doesn't someone just pick the damn thing up?" Rika snottily said.
"We're just waiting for the day where the rightful owner reunites with the lost sock! We like to call it A Cinderella Story: Locker Room Romance," Takuya dramatically said.
"That doesn't sound right...," Kouichi frowned.
"We have full, extensive coverage on the sock story too," JP said.
"That's because there's nothing else to write about...but I wouldn't say that out loud," Ivan mumbled.
"Look, our club is in danger! If we don't make any progress, Principal Sampson's going to pull the plug on us," Takuya said.
"So what do you want us to do about it?" Rika scoffed.
"Oooh, feisty one there...," Takuya raised an eyebrow.
"We were wondering if you guys would like to be our cover story," Ivan clasped his hands together.
"I'm down with that. What do you guys think?" Tai turned to his club mates.
"I don't care," Koji scoffed.
"Ditto," Rika said.
"Didn't see that one coming," Kouichi sarcastically mumbled.
"Sounds cool, I guess...," Takato shrugged.
"Oooh! Let's do it!" Mimi squealed.
"We're gonna be famous!" Davis and TK yelled in unison.
"I like it. What do you think, Izzy?" Sora asked.
"I don't see the harm in it," Izzy shrugged.
"So...?" Takuya flashed an eager smile.
"Yes. You guys can publish an article about us. How about we start the interview tomorrow?" Izzy said.
"You, sir, are a beautiful person!" Ivan picked Izzy up and gave him a bear hug.
"Gah! Can you please put me down?" Izzy said.
"He's a bit scared of heights. He's not used to high altitudes, since...ya know, he's short and all," Tai smirked.
"Shut up!" Izzy growled.
"We scored the interview!" Takuya jumped into the classroom.
"Congratulations," Ken smiled.
"Yeah, congrats...," Kouki rolled his eyes.
"Come on, Kouki! Show a little more enthusiasm!" Takuya nudged Kouki in the rib.
"How's this for enthusiasm?!" Kouki shoved Takuya to the floor.
"What's your problem, Kouki?" JP asked as he helped Takuya up from the ground.
"I'll tell you what my problem is! How is it fair that that club does nothing but eat pizza and chat with people, and they don't have any threats of getting shut down? How is that fair?" Kouki yelled.
"In their defense, they have a lot of fundraisers, so it's not like they're sitting on their asses all day," Ken said.
"You're only saying that because you're friends with those derps! If those kids weren't popular and good-looking, they'd be facing the same fate as us!" Kouki cracked his knuckles.
"But not all of them attractive. Isn't that nerdy kid the president of the club?" Ivan scratched his head.
"Yeah, he's just a computer club reject," Takuya shrugged.
"Oh yeah? Then what about the other members, eh? There's the captain of the varsity soccer team, there's that hot broad who plays tennis and volleyball, there's that blond douchelord wannabe rockstar-what is it, Takuya?" Kouki said in an irritated tone.
"I don't mean to be a nitpicker, but I just thought to let you know Matt Ishida isn't a host," Takuya corrected.
"SERIOUSLY?! These guys are relentless!" Matt yelled from out of the hallway.
"Hold up, let me close the door. There's too much noise in the hallway," Ken slammed the door shut.
"At least we know his derpy, blond brother's in the club, and so is his heterosexual life partner, mini-Tai, then there's that hot new chick from America, some random twin frosh, and a couple of middle schoolers, one of them not even from this school! That stupid club is just an excuse for those bastards to socialize and get credits for it!"
"Even if what you said was true-," Ken said.
"It is true," Kouki interrupted.
"Well, then. Even if we listed the facts, this host club is our only resort to attracting more readers," Ken stated.
"No! There's got to be another way! The last thing I want to do is crawl over and beg those guys for help! You might as well cut my balls off!" Kouki yelled.
"Then what do you propose we do?" Ken pulled out a lunchbox and opened it up.
"Uh...I don't know, but there's gotta be something! There just has to be," Kouki said.
"In the meantime, I suggest you interview those guys. Our deadline's approaching quickly, and I highly doubt you'll come up with a different idea by then," Ken casually spread goat cheese on a cracker.
"Hey! That's my food," JP whined.
"Finders keepers," Ken munched on a cracker.
"But-ugh-grrr!" Kouki tugged at his hair.
"Here. You might want this," Ken handed Kouki a plastic knife. "Get to cutting."
"Alright, the newspaper club will be here any minute now, so I want you all to be on your best behavior," Izzy said.
"But that's boring!" Davis whined.
"He's got a point," Kouki leaned against the doorway.
"Oh, hi there. We weren't expecting you until at least another five minutes," Izzy let out a nervous chuckle.
"Momentai...," Tai whispered into Izzy's ear.
"What does that even mean?" Izzy grunted.
"I don't know but I hear the half-Chinese kid say it a lot," Tai rubbed Izzy's shoulders.
"Don't you mean Henry?" Takato asked.
"Yeah, that kid!" Tai said.
"That kid's name is Henry, so you can stop referring to him as the half-Chinese kid," Rika snarled.
"Got it! Henry, Henry, Henry...," Tai massaged his temples and paced around the room.
"What a doof," Rika shook her head.
"Uh...would you guys like to come in?" Izzy forced a smile.
"That'll be five dollars please!" Mimi sprung in front of the doorway.
"That's not necessary," Izzy gently moved Mimi to the side. "Wanna take a look around?"
"Hell yeah!" Takuya said.
"I'm so excited," Ivan rubbed his hands together.
"Is there going to be any food?" JP said.
"Yeah, we make sure to have some light snacks around. After all, we do want to make the guests feel like home," Izzy said.
"So does that mean I can take my shoes off?" Takuya asked.
"I guess, if you want to. Nobody's ever asked that question before," Izzy shrugged.
"Sweet!" Takuya took off his shoes. He tied the laces together and hung the shoes on his neck.
"So, for starters...what does a host club do?" JP asked.
"I can take care of this," Tai rested his arm on Takuya's shoulder. "As a host club, our mission statement is to promote school unity by spreading love and friendship to everyone!"
"Interesting...," Kouki tapped his chin.
"So what's with the girl by the door?" JP stared at Mimi with googly eyes.
"She...*snap* hey buddy, over here," Tai snapped his fingers in JP's face. "She's like our ticket ripper. Here's how it works: the clients pay an entry fee, then Mimi collects the money. From there, Mimi pulls out a binder...," Tai walked behind Mimi and took the binder from her hands.
"Hey!" Mimi crossed her arms.
"Relax, I'll give it back soon. I'm just showing the boys something," Tai said. "Would you guys like to take a peek?"
"Why not?" Kouki said. He placed the binder down on a tabletop and began flipping through the pages. "What is this?"
"Oh, those are some profile pages I've compiled of our various hosts! Not only does it give people an opportunity to get to know our staff, it also makes it easier for the clients to choose who they want to hang out with," Tai explained.
"Is she in the book?" JP pointed at Mimi.
"No. She's the unofficial club manager. Only the hosts are listed in the binder," Tai said.
"I like her. I think she's hot-but I wouldn't say that out loud," Ivan pointed at Sora's profile page.
"You just did...," Takuya said.
"It's okay! I think she's hot too!" Tai blurted.
"Oh really?" Kouki looked amused.
"Yeah! I mean, wouldn't you agree that Sora's an attractive person? She's not the ugliest person in the world-I'm not saying she's ugly, because she's not! I don't know what you're thinking, but I don't like her in that way, you know? I mean, I do like her, but we're just friends! Eh, I'm not saying that we couldn't be more than friends, because we totally could, but-" Tai flustered.
"Hmm...," Takuya tried to stifle his laughter.
"Izzy, help!" Tai reached over behind a table and pulled on Izzy's blazer.
"Sorry. Can you excuse me for a bit?" Izzy said to a girl.
"Okay," the girl smiled.
"Tai, what?" Izzy sighed.
"Can you distract these guys for a little bit? I kinda acted like an idiot so you need to fix this," Tai whispered.
"Do I look like a handyman to you?" Izzy put his hands on his hips.
"Not really, but one quick trip to the costume shop will take care of that," Tai said.
"Just go...," Izzy shooed Tai away.
"Izzy, how did you come up with the idea of a host club?" JP asked.
"Actually, it was all Tai's idea," Izzy said.
"Really?" Kouki said.
"But aren't you president of the club?" Takuya asked.
"Yeah, but-"
"Is it true that you were rejected from the computer club?" Ivan interrupted.
"No, that is not true!" Izzy gasped.
"Then why aren't you in the computer club? Don't you like computers?" JP asked.
"I do, but I decided to quit the computer club. I didn't feel that the computer club was fulfilling anymore, and Tai offered me the president position for the host club, so I took a chance. I'm actually proud of how successful our club is, and to think that somehow I had an impact on our success. Actually, each host member plays an important role in the club," Izzy said.
"That's nice," Kouki said curtly.
"If you guys want, feel free to go around and talk to the other club members. I'm pretty sure they'd like to say something too," Izzy said.
"I think JP's way ahead of you there...," Takuya said through the side of his mouth.
"So, can I get your number?" JP clasped his hands together.
"Um, no. My cell phone only works in America, so I can't use it here. Sorry," Mimi pouted.
"Bummer," JP walked away.
"Mimi, I'm pretty sure you can still use your phone here even though you bought it in America," Sora whispered.
"Yeah, I know. I just didn't want to give that kid my number. He's a freshman dweeb," Mimi wriggled her nose.
"That's nice," Sora sighed.
"Whoa! I didn't know you guys were in the host club!" Takuya gasped.
"Yep," Kouichi said.
"Don't remind me...," Koji pressed his lips together.
"You," Kouki approached Koji. "What made you join the host club?"
"Tai," Koji said.
"Tai made you join the host club?" Ivan scratched his head.
"Yeah. Me and my brother were just waiting for Alchemy class to end, when this bigheaded porcupine blur dashed into our classroom and kidnapped us," Koji said.
"Come on! You're just being a drama queen," Kouichi shook his head.
"Oh really? So how did it happen?" Kouki stared at Kouichi.
"Well...we were in Alchemy, and Tai did burst into the classroom, but he didn't kidnap us. He just...picked us up and brought us here. He's a pretty strong guy. Now that I think about it...he did sorta kidnap us," Kouichi rubbed his chin.
"Interesting," Kouki nodded.
"So what's up with you, middle schoolers?" Ivan goofily grinned.
"What's there to know about us?" Rika snarled.
"Aren't you that kid whose parents run the bakery?" JP asked Takato.
"Yeah, that's me," Takato shyly smiled.
"Just wondering because I go to your bakery all the time," JP said.
"Sure looks like it," Rika muttered.
"You can tell? I guess you can smell the Guilmon bread on me. It's my favorite thing there," JP sniffed his uniform.
"Yes. It's the smell that gives it away," Rika rolled her eyes.
"I think she was trying to call you fat," Ivan said.
"I'm not fat. I'm just tall...and cute...and cuddly," JP pouted.
"You're tall, but I don't know about the rest," Rika said.
"Hah hah, she's funny!" Takuya laughed.
"I think that's enough," Takato sighed. "Come on, Rika. I think there are a couple of people waiting to play another round of cards."
"Cards?" Kouki asked.
"Yeah. Today's game is Digimon cards," Takato replied.
"Digimon cards? Aren't those for nerds?" Takuya stuck out his tongue.
"No. At least you should see Rika play. She kicks everyone's butts," Takato said.
"Awww man!" a group of boys whined in unison.
"Come to mama...," Rika slid stacks of poker chips close to her.
"Oh my gosh!" a crowd of girls squealed in the corner.
"Let's see what's going on there," Kouki droned.
"I'm soooo in love!" one girl raved.
"Take it off! Take it off!" Yolei chanted.
"What the hell is going on?" Kouki tried to squeeze in between the girls to see what they were screaming about.
"As long as I'm with you, it's like we're in our own little world," TK breathily sighed.
"I couldn't have said it better myself," Davis stroked TK's cheek.
"Ahhh! So hot!" the girls gushed.
"What is wrong with the girls at this school?" Kouki muttered.
"I wish I knew," Sora said.
"You heard that, huh?" Kouki pressed his lips together.
"Trust me, I feel the same way. If it weren't for the host club, I wouldn't have met any normal girls," Sora said.
"Really? You call that normal?" Ivan pointed at Mimi.
"Five dollars, please!" Mimi yelled.
"Put it on my tab!" Matt said.
"You don't have a tab! What do you think this is?" Mimi stomped her foot.
"Someone help!" Matt screamed.
"No! No mercy!" Mimi jumped on Matt's back.
"Okay, maybe that's not normal...but I've been friends with Mimi for a long time, so I got used to her," Sora said.
"Stop! Please! I'm begging you!" Matt yelled.
"Hate to cut it short, but I should go before it gets worse," Sora nudged through the newspaper boys and dashed toward the door.
"I think we're done here anyways," Kouki rolled up his sleeves.
"Are you sure, boss?" Takuya asked.
"We've got everything we need," Kouki said.
"If you say so...," JP had an uncertain look on his face.
"You're going down, Kamiya. You're going down...," Kouki said through his teeth.
*knock knock*
"We're not open yet!" Mimi shouted.
"It's the Newspaper Club!"
"Let them in," Tai said.
"Okay! Hi guys!" Mimi opened the door.
"Hey! We just wanted to bring you guys a copy of our next issue before it officially goes out," Takuya handed Tai a newspaper.
"You'll even get to see it before Principal Sampson," JP added.
"And he's the first one to read the paper. None of our issues go out without being read by him first," Ivan said.
"Thanks! Everyone look! It's our article!" Tai called the host club over.
"Sweet!" Davis grinned.
"Thanks for bringing it over," Sora said.
"I can't read it! I'm too excited!" Tai's hands began to tremble. "Someone, read it for me!"
"I don't have time for this. Give it," Koji huffed.
"Eeeee!" Tai squealed.
"One of the newest clubs in the school, the Odaiba High School Host Club, is also a club rapidly growing in popularity. How did a club like this become the big hit it is now? The Newspaper Club was fortunate enough to get an inside look at one of the most infamous organizations in the school. As soon as you step in front of the doorway, you are immediately transported into a world of pure debauchery. From racist slurs against the half-Chinese, to underground gambling, erotic exhibitionists, reverse harems, and the typical harems, this host club is packed with more chaos than Shibuya on a typical Saturday night."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Koji, stop making things up and read what's actually there!" Tai said.
"But I'm not making things up...this time. Although the Odaiba Host Club is evidently the brainchild of one of the most beloved students in the school, Tai Kamiya-"
"I guess you don't have to be in the host club to assume that," Sora flatly said.
"He has passed on the responsibilities of president to an unjustifiably conceited Izzy Izumi, who was excommunicated from the Computer Club for his pompous attitude-"
"You might not like me, but that doesn't mean you can be a smartass," Izzy snatched the paper from Koji and rolled it.
"I'm not being a smartass...this time. I swear on Kouichi!" Koji said.
"Gee, thanks...," Kouichi said.
"There's no way you guys could have published that!" TK said.
"I thought you guys liked us!" Davis frowned.
"We do like you!" Ivan said.
"Then why did you write mean things about us?" Tai crossed his arms.
"We didn't know! Honest to god!" JP said.
"We don't write the articles, Kouki does," Ivan said.
"Then what do you guys do?" Sora raised an eyebrow.
"I print the papers," Takuya put his hand on his chest. "JP sorts the pages, and Ivan folds the papers."
"So you guys never look at what you're printing?" Izzy asked in concern.
"Nope. We just assume everything's fine," Ivan said.
"Idiots. They make the host club look like Einsteins," Rika muttered.
"We can't have this going around the school! Our reputation's gonna be wrecked!" Tai gasped for air.
"You're worried about what the student population thinks?! We should be more concerned of what would happen if Principal Sampson takes a look at this!" Izzy hit Tai with the rolled up newspaper.
"He's right," Sora bit her thumb.
"Principal Sampson said that if he heard even one complaint about us, he's gonna shut us down!" Izzy yelled.
"We can't shut down! Then how are we gonna get our credits?" Davis whimpered.
"How about you join the newspaper club?" Takuya stupidly suggested.
"You idiot!" Koji lunged toward Takuya.
"Gahhhh!" Takuya fell backward.
"How do you expect all of us to join the newspaper club when you guys are gonna be closed down too?! It's going to be all your fault if I don't get accepted for the kendo retreat!" Koji thrashed Takuya's head to the ground.
*bash bash bash bash*
"Get off of him!" Kouichi tried to pull Koji away.
"Uhhhuhhihuuhuhhh...," Takuya grunted.
"Let go of him!" Tai struggled to hold Koji still.
"Get lost, dummkopf!" Koji elbowed Tai in the nose.
"Ohhhh!" Tai gasped in pain.
"Please don't kill him! I can't bear to look at this anymore!" Mimi cried.
*bonk bonk bonk*
"Stop it! This is exactly why all of the other clubs didn't want you!" Kouichi wrapped his arms around Koji's waist, as to pry him off of Takuya.
"I don't care! Thanks to this idiot here, it doesn't matter!" Koji growled.
"Bakallahbhhuw...," Takuya moaned.
"You crazy kid!" Ivan flicked Koji's head back.
"You wanna start something, you small head?!" Koji shook his fist at Ivan.
"I don't have a small head! My muscles just look super big compared to my head!" Ivan frowned.
"MOMENTAI!"
"Takato?" everyone paused.
"Moh...men...tai...," Takato slowly said. "Now repeat after me. Moh...men...tai!"
"What the hell? Do you really expect everyone to stop fighting because you're going mental?" Rika grimaced.
"It's working, isn't it?" Takato shrugged.
"Holy shit, how did you do that?" Davis gaped.
"It's like a magic word. Henry taught me," Takato said.
"Wow. Those half-Chinese are really ahead of the curve," Tai remarked.
"Next time my parents yell at me when I get a bad report card, I'm totally saying that word!" Davis said. "Me-moh-tai?"
"Moh-men-tai," Takato corrected.
"Tee-men-moh?" JP cocked his head to the side.
"Moh...men...tai," Takato drawled.
"Moh...men...tai," everyone, minus Rika, said in unison.
"For some reason, that word makes me feel...not angry," Koji relaxed his shoulders. "Sorry I cracked your head all over the floor, Takuya."
"Moh...men...tai...," Takuya barely moved his mouth.
"Now what are we gonna do? Principal Sampson's gonna read that paper any time soon!" Tai went back to panicking.
"Uh...it's not like we can sneak into his office and take the paper before he reads it," Ivan tapped his chin.
"You're a genius! Why don't we sneak into Sampson's office?" Tai snapped his fingers.
"How are we going to do that? I don't want to get in trouble," Sora said.
"We've got a plan. Okay, so here's how it's gonna go," Davis pulled out a large piece of paper. "I know for a fact that Sampson goes for a donut run as soon as the dismissal bell rings, and he doesn't return until fifteen minutes later."
"Of course you would know that," Rika rolled her eyes.
"While he's gone, Mimi and Sora will stop by Sampson's office to return something of his. As they're off distracting the secretary, me and TK will sneak into Sampson's office and search for the paper," Davis said.
"In the meantime, we have to destroy the evidence. Since we don't have a large shredder at the school, we're going to have to hide the rest of the copies somewhere. I was going to suggest Rika's school for the time being, but I doubt we'll have enough time to bring all of the papers there, so our only other option is Takato's locker," TK said.
"Why is my locker always the dumping ground for your illegal objects?" Takato said.
"Because you're a middle schooler and no one would suspect anything being in a middle schooler's locker," Davis said.
"Wrong," Izzy did a thumbs-down.
"Wrong?" everyone gasped.
"Wrong. That reason alone might give the authorities a reason to inspect Takato's locker. After a while, they'll catch on and search the least expected place first," Izzy said.
"Good point...but the only other place I can think of is Matt's van, and I don't have the keys to it," TK rubbed his chin.
"I can take care of that," Rika said.
"Awesome. So we'll dump all of the papers there, and then we can drive to the recycling plant and drop them off there," Davis said. "You do know how to hotwire a car, right Rika?"
"I won't deny or confirm it," Rika smirked.
"Now that we have that figured out, that gives us...," Davis glanced at his phone. "Five minutes?!"
"How are we supposed to get all of this stuff done by then?" Sora yelled.
"Takato, I need you to stand by the south wing entrance and keep an eye out for Sampson. When he gets through the door, run into him and throw yourself down on the floor. That should buy us some more time! Are we ready?" Davis asked.
"No. What are we supposed to 'return' to the principal?" Sora asked.
"Oh, I got something...," Davis rummaged through his bag. "Bingo!"
At the Newspaper Club HQ!
"How many of these did you put out in circulation?" Izzy's jaw dropped at the stacks of paper in the room.
"I think 4500...," Ivan said.
"What?! There's only 2700 students in the school," Izzy shook.
"We only did it just in case people wanted to buy more than one copy. It's total logic," Takuya said.
"If you think so. I didn't want to buy even one copy," JP said.
"Okay, we need to get these things out of here fast!" Tai frantically flapped his hands.
"Then let's start carrying," Izzy took off his blazer jacket and lifted up a huge stack of newspapers. "Now where did Matt park his van?"
"Parking Lot 2," Tai said.
"Okey dokie!" Ivan effortlessly picked up a pile of papers.
"Gah...how can you guys lift these? I can barely carry five!" Tai staggered out of the class, with only a couple of newspapers in his arms.
"These things are heavy," Takuya grunted.
"They sure are," JP began to quiver.
"Seriously? You're only carrying one newspaper," Koji scornfully said, with Kouichi silently following him. The boys walked out into the parking lot and made their way toward Rika.
"How's it going?" Tai called out.
"Just give me a second," Rika pulled a bobby pin out of the keyhole and lightly punched the door three times.
*creeeek* the car door sprung open.
"How did you do that?" Tai gasped.
"A magician never reveals her secrets," Rika nonchalantly said.
"Okay, come on guys! Let's get the rest of the papers in," Izzy said.
"Coming...," Ivan dashed into the school building and came out with stacks and stacks of newspapers.
"And here's the last of 'em!" JP dropped one copy down to the floor.
"Now let's get these out of here! Rika, hotwire this car!" Tai commanded.
"What do you take me for? A criminal?" Rika sounded offended.
"Well, yeah. You know how to pick locks...," Tai nervously smiled.
"Oh, so now everyone who picks locks is automatically a criminal?" Rika put her hands on her hips.
"Uh...," Tai blinked.
"Man, you're too easy to scare. Everyone, hop in," Rika shook her head. She took a couple more bobby pins out of her hair and twisted them together. She climbed into the driver's seat, clipped the seatbelt on, and shoved the bobby pins into the ignition.
"Wow, now that's some serious skill," Kouichi said in awe as the car started.
"Criminal," Koji smirked.
"Just for that...," Rika took off her seatbelt and lunged toward Koji.
Meanwhile...
"What do you know? It's Kouki," Davis said.
"Where are you off to, Kouki?" TK raised an eyebrow.
"Nowhere that's any of your business," Kouki snorted.
"Oh, okay. We don't want to hold you up," Davis slid in front of Kouki.
"That would be bad...," TK also stood in front of Kouki.
"Then get out of my way!" Kouki growled.
"We'll let you go in a sec," TK said.
"We just want to know something first," Davis hummed.
"Why did you write lies about us?" TK asked.
"I didn't write any lies," Kouki crossed his arms.
"Yes you did," Davis pressed his lips together.
"Prove it," Kouki smugly said.
"You said we were racist against the half-Chinese," TK said.
"No I didn't. I said you guys threw racist slurs against the half-Chinese. Slightly different," Kouki said.
"But we never did that!" TK exclaimed.
"Yes you did. I have proof," Kouki pulled a tiny recording device out of his jacket pocket.
*click* "What does that even mean? *static* I don't know but I hear the half-Chinese kid say it a lot." the recording played.
"That's not a racist slur!" Davis yelled.
"You're just twisting our words around!" TK gasped.
"Who cares? All that matters is that justice will be served. I'm going to show everyone how Kamiya uses his popularity to corrupt the student body, and then no one will want to go to your little host club anymore. Kamiya's club will be shut down, and the Newspaper Club will hold on a little while longer."
"Why are you out to get Tai?" Davis sadfully looked at Kouki.
"That smug bastard thinks he can do whatever he wants just because he's popular. Someone's gotta stop it, and that someone's going to be me!" Kouki jerked his thumb to his chest.
"But Tai didn't do anything bad. He doesn't mean to hurt anyone. If you really got to know him better, you would know that he had a heart of gold," TK said.
"Yeah. He was trying to help your club out. He could have always said no," Davis said.
"And to thank him for that, you decide to stab him in the back? If you ask me, you're the corrupt one," TK said.
"Get lost. I have some papers to deliver," Kouki shoved TK and Davis out of the way and walked down the hallway.
"Didja get it?" TK asked.
"Sure did," Davis bumped fists with TK.
In Parking Lot 2...
"Bam shika bam shika boom boom boom-" Matt twirled his keys on his finger. He confidently strolled into Parking Lot 2, beatboxing on the way. As he got closer, he could have sworn he saw Koji fall out of the van. "What the...? I've got to be seeing things!" Matt squinted and picked up his pace.
*SCREEEEECH* Matt's van sped out of the parking lot.
"What the hell?!" Matt yelled.
"She took your van," Koji sat up in the cement.
"By she, you mean Rika, don't you?" Matt groaned.
"Yeah," Koji rubbed his shoulder. "I think I dislocated my arm."
"Dammit Tai!" Matt tugged at his hair.
"Why are you mad at Tai? Rika's the one who's driving your van...," Koji said.
"Because he's behind it! He's always behind the causes of my misery!" Matt growled.
"Get over yourself," Koji huffed.
At Principal Sampson's Office...
"Hi! Is Principal Sampson here?" Mimi sweetly asked the secretary.
"No. He just stepped out a couple of minutes ago, but he should be back soon. Do you guys want to wait?" a pretty woman with straight, burgundy hair asked.
"No, that's alright...," Sora looked at the corner of her eye. TK and Davis lurked by the hallway, signaling the girls to be quiet.
"Is something wrong?" the secretary asked.
"No...uh, anyways we just came by to return this to Principal Sampson!" Sora suddenly shoved a badly-made, clay coffee cup into the table.
"#1 Mom?" the secretary quizzically read the mug.
"Hah hah, yeah! Isn't it funny? Uh...," Sora nervously laughed. The boys were crawling past the secretary's desk.
"Oh my gosh! You have a lovely hair color!" Mimi gushed to the secretary.
"You think? It's natural. I was thinking of dyeing it," the secretary picked up a piece of her hair.
"Oh my gosh, don't do that! If you dye your hair, you can't change it back to your original color!" Mimi gasped.
"But didn't you dye your hair a bunch of colors?" Sora asked.
"Well, yeah! But my hair turned this icky mousy brown! Now I have to use a red glaze to make my hair look somewhat richer!" Mimi said.
"Really?" the secretary asked.
"Yeah, it's totally tragic! With a natural hair color like yours, I wouldn't change it," Mimi shook her head. TK peeked out of the principal's office and flashed the girls a thumbs up. Davis stood behind him, holding a newspaper in his hand.
"You girls are so sweet. I guess I'm not going to color my hair after all. I should cancel my appointment," the secretary pulled out her cell phone.
"We should get going anyways," Sora pulled Mimi by the wrist.
"Have a nice day!" Mimi waved to the secretary.
"You too, girls," the secretary waved back.
"Awesome work there!" Davis approached the girls in the hallway.
"Mimi, that was pretty clever," TK chuckled.
"What? That lopsided coffee cup?" Mimi cluelessly asked.
"What was up with that mug?" Sora raised an eyebrow.
"My mom forced me to join a pottery class, so I made a crappy cup and gave it to her for Mother's Day. The next day, my mom said that she'd let me quit the class if I promised to stop making things for her," Davis grinned.
"Your mom sounds like a nice lady," Sora frowned.
At the South Wing Entrance...
"Here goes nothing...," Takato sucked in his breath and peeked out of the glass doors.
*click* the doors opened and Principal Sampson stepped inside.
"Whoaaaaa!" Takato purposely tripped on his feet and crashed into him, causing Sampson to drop his coffee and box of donuts to the floor.
"Watch it, son!" Principal Sampson said.
"Sorry...," Takato turned red.
"..." Principal Sampson stared at Takato.
"Uh...I'm sorry! A bee was chasing me-did I mention, I'm sorry?" Takato babbled.
"That's odd. It's a bit too cold for bees to out," Principal Sampson looked through the glass doors.
"I'm really sorry about your donuts...," Takato winced at the mess on the floor. "If you want, you can always stop by my family's bakery! I'll get you a dozen Guilmon breads on the house! I'm sorry!"
"Don't worry about it, son. Just be more careful next time," Principal Sampson said, as he walked over the donuts and down the hallway.
"Oh boy, that was scary," Takato exhaled.
The next week...
"If it weren't for you guys, our club would be done for!" Takuya said.
"Since we didn't have enough paper supply, Principal Sampson decided to give us another chance," Ivan said.
"Aww, I'm glad we could help," Tai gushed.
"And we came up with a couple of new ideas over the weekend! We were thinking of setting up a profile page on the internet for the school news. That way, people can post their opinions and comments on our headline stories," JP said.
"Nice, an interactive, digital version of the school paper," Izzy nodded in approval.
"And to make some money, we could also put out personal ads! It's the perfect way to promote your business, your band, basically anything!" Takuya excitedly said.
"That sounds awesome," Takato said.
"We're trying to make the school newspaper so that everyone can contribute!" Takuya said.
"Yeah, this kid named Jaime's going to start contributing his comics and drawings," JP nodded.
"He's pretty good. Look at this sketch he drew of me," Ivan pulled out a sheet of paper. "It's called a caricature. My head looks so small, but it makes my muscles look bigger."
"When is someone going to tell him that it's not a caricature?" Koji whispered.
"Hey, where's Kouki?" Tai asked.
"I don't know. I haven't seen him since Friday," Takuya shrugged.
"He just up and left," JP said.
"He didn't even say goodbye...," Ivan glumly frowned.
"Bummer," TK and Davis smirked at each other.
"What did you guys do?" Izzy and Sora asked at the same time.
"Oh, nothing...we just had a little recording session with Kouki," TK nonchalantly pulled out Kouki's tape recorder.
"Let's just say that he won't be bothering anyone at this school anymore," Davis winked.
"You blackmailed him into switching schools?" Izzy gasped.
"What? He started it," Davis shrugged.
"We couldn't tell Tai the whole story. It would break his heart if he found out how far Kouki was going to go," TK said.
"We just had to take matters into our own hands. We're not just a host club," Davis said.
"We're family," TK said.
"And family sticks together," Davis hugged TK.
"Damn straight," TK nodded.