Epilogue
One Step Forward…
Some day, in the middle of some week, somewhere.
We've been clear of any sign of PK marauders for three weekens since we brought her back. No chase, no communication. If you ask me, something is very wrong. Our plans never go this well. Or maybe, MY plans never go this well.
One Starburst here, let Moya rest, another Starburst there.
Maybe this time we've really come through. Maybe this time fate has learned better than to fuck with John Crichton. Or maybe, it's just tired of fucking with John Crichton. Hell, either way, I'm not complaining because I'm tired too.
It's hard to sleep, hard not to be constantly on guard; wondering what's going to go wrong. Taly is coming around, slowly but surely. Faster than I had hoped, slower than Aeryn had hoped. She's just like her mom. Could make for some interesting situations in the future. Aeryn's used to the boys club, she has been for a long time, it works for her. We'll see how these two react to stubborn female PK determination coming at them from the other side.
I've got a feeling that there could be some huge blow-ups in the future. Some interesting…situations, and I plan on staying as far out of the middle of them as I can. Hell if I'm going to go up against either of them when they're angry. And yet I'm so ready for that, so ready for anything that goes down as long as she's here, as long as she's safe.
Bottom line is; it doesn't matter what happens. It was all worth it, every damn minute. Every minute of worry and struggle. Every minute of wondering if it was ever going to work out.
Just to see her smile. Just to see the look on Aeryn's face. Just to realize that Taly is back, she's safe, and we're going to be okay.
I'm no hero. I'm just a guy from Earth, trying to keep my family safe.
Maybe things are going to work out after all.
Over and out.
John closes the tattered, leather bound journal that he's been writing in for the past 20 minutes.
Something to help keep me sane, or maybe just help me remember what it is that I was thinking on any given day. I am getting older after all.
He scans the large window before him in Command, looking for something, anything that might be out of the ordinary. Not that anything is really ever ordinary out here, but something that didn't look right even by these rough standards.
An unfamiliar craft, a star shining just a bit brighter than it should be.
Something, anything to let him know that the screwing wasn't entirely finished yet.
"Pilot, anything showing up? You spot anything weird, anything on the comms?" he asks hesitantly.
Maybe you don't want the answer John.
"Nothing Commander," Pilot huffs in annoyance. "Nothing since we left the orbit of the planet several weekens ago, and definitely nothing since you asked us just 150 microts earlier."
John scratches at the nape of his neck. "It's going too well, this is going too smoothly."
Don't over think it John, take it for what it is and just live for once.
Yeah, he could do that. He would do that, but he can't let his guard down entirely.
He can do it, take it one day at a time.
His life is absolutely crazy, and he wouldn't trade it for anything in the universe.
- -
Time passes slowly over the next few solar days.
It passes at a pace that says peace. But Aeryn doesn't feel peace. Not quite yet.
Traveling, pressing forward, moving on from the nightmares, from the uncertainty. Moving on to the future.
And the way my life goes, who frelling knows what that means.
It has all happened so fast.
The girl is still reserved. They've all made some progress with her. Talking comes more easily. Their daughter is not as resentful, not as fearful of their intentions.
Memories are gnawing at her, eating through the tough resolve, the tough exterior that the past seven cycles have thrown around her.
Aeryn can tell in the knowing glances that she gets from the girl sometimes. Tell in the way that she interacts with her brother, in the way that she interacts with her father.
And sometimes, just occasionally, in the way she interacts with you.
But Talyse'un still spends most of her time shut away in her quarters. She reads occasionally, but most of the time she just stares. Lies on her bunk and dreams.
Dreams of the past, of the future perhaps?
Nightmares and uncertainty.
Aeryn's not sure. She can only guess based on the way she felt after she lost everything that she had thought mattered to her.
Nothing made any frelling sense. Not for a long, long time.
Her daughter cries sometimes, when she thinks no one can hear her. But Aeryn can always hear her, and it breaks her heart.
She's coming around baby, nothing worth having comes easy. We've all made progress; just think of where we were three weekens ago.
John would say, trying to help her keep things in perspective. Always there to keep her grounded when her frustration gets the best of her; when it blinds her to reality, to time and space.
But she still doesn't know how to deal with this.
Frelling family.
It's like trying to fly a prowler when you've never been space bound. It's like trying to find your way around a foreign planet without any navigational tools to guide you in your journey.
It's all worth it.
And she knows that it is. She knows that now, every bit of pain and confusion, every bit of fear and denial, it's all worth it.
Her callous past is nothing compared to what she knows now, what she knows can happen for all of them.
Aeryn is shaken out of her singular thoughts by the noise her youngest son makes as he drums his utensils against his clay plate, much more interested in seeing how far he can take it before he gets reprimanded than he is in actually eating any of the food that sits before him.
It has been a silent meal, no one having much to say.
No one knowing exactly what to say.
Aeryn takes a bite of food from her plate, optimism waning. She's not hungry and not particularly enjoying this meal time. She isn't in the mood to fight with her son about eating, so she lets him continue with his frelling racket, biting down the urge to tell him to stop and just eat his frelling food.
John isn't doing much more than picking at his food either; obviously tired and frustrated. They have been on the run, trying to make sure they haven't been followed for weekens now. They are all absolutely ready to stop at the next planet they find and get out of the confines of Moya, even if it is just for a short amount of time.
He rests his hand on her thigh, massaging tight muscles.
"Mommy, can't I please go tell Taly about something? I'm not hungry anyways," Jack is fidgeting and sitting is becoming a challenge. He hasn't left the girl alone, looking for any excuse to pick at her, question her, or just stare.
"Curiosity killed the cat," John mumbles under his breath.
"No Jack, eat your food and sit down. Just for a few more microts please," Aeryn pleads, looking at the boy as John rubs her back, sensing her frustration, her exhaustion.
Even though sleep has been coming more easily and more frequently, the emotional weight of the situation is becoming hard to bear and is wearing on them all. John quickly speaks up in an attempt to neutralize the situation.
"Finish your food up buddy, then you can go talk to your sister about whatever you want okay?" he says, a life preserver to get them through yet another meal drowning in awkward silence.
"As long as she doesn't realize what a pain in the ass you are and tell you to buzz off. You know she will eventually," D'Argo mutters earning him a stern look from John. The tense atmosphere is even beginning to affect their eldest son's normally docile attitude.
"Or you could talk to me about it now Jack," Taly's timid voice floats from the corridor. She stands shyly by the door, not sure whether to come fully into the room or head back from where she came. "May I join you?"
Aeryn almost chokes on the small bite she has taken.
Is this really happening?
Taly hasn't wanted to join them for a mealtime yet. Preferring to keep what little contact she has with them to a minimum.
Keep the odds on her side.
Taly seems to set her resolve, making a choice. A choice about her future, a choice about the path she's going to take.
"Yeah, sure kiddo," John says, sounding like he's trying to quell his excitement at this seemingly monumental step. He stands and pulls back the seat next to D'Argo for her to sit. The spot in which she would probably be most comfortable reserved and waiting.
There is an empty plate already set.
John Crichton, the eternal optimist.
John fills her plate with the thick stew and smirks, "You've gotta be hungry. Do you like Helatean stew? Might not be the best you've ever had, you know, considering I made it and all, but it was made with love."
"Which doesn't make up for the lack of flavor unfortunately," D'Argo quips with a smile and a knowing glance at the girl.
"Well then buddy, next time you can cook. What do you say about that?" John replies.
"No, not a chance in hezmana that's happening. We would like to live after all," Aeryn says to her son, eyes never leaving the girl.
The tension breaks and she allows herself a deep breath of relief as they laugh.
Aeryn Sun doesn't joke, but she does know the absolute right buttons to press when she wants to tease, and that she does very well.
She's laughing, their lost little girl, their soldier, is actually laughing.
John reclaims his seat next to her, immediately taking her free hand in his, where it belongs. He squeezes tightly and his strong thumb never stops rubbing the back of her hand.
It's a simple gesture that says more than a thousand words possibly could.
It says I love you.
It says that this is their family now and always.
It says that this has all been worth it, everything. Every frelling microt.
And it says that maybe, just maybe, things are going to be okay.
the end