FLASHBACK

Lexa scanned the library shelves, looking for books on political science. She was eager to get started learning as much as she could. For so long, schoolwork had been her escape from the bullying and the trauma, and from that her passion for political science had stemmed. She was so wrapped up with her new books that as she turned, she ran straight into another blonde girl.

"Crap," Lexa muttered. "I am so sorry." While Lexa had managed to hold on to her own books, the other girl's books were all over the floor. She bent down to help the stranger pick them up.

"No worries," she replied. "I wasn't watching where I was going." Lexa finished helping her grab her books. "I'm Niylah, by the way."

Lexa looked at her in surprise. "Oh!" she exclaimed. "I'm, uh, I'm Lexa."

A sly smile came over Niylah's face. "Oh, so you're Lexa," she said. She eyed Lexa up and down. "I can see why she likes you."

Lexa blushed furiously. "Uh, yeah, we're good friends."

Niylah's smile grew. "Mmm, I'll bet," she said. "You know, Clarke and I once had a very intimate relationship. Too bad it didn't work out."

Lexa's brows furrowed in confusion. "Wait, what do you mean?"

"Oh, one-night stands and the like," Niylah said casually.

Suddenly, the puzzle pieces clicked in place. Clarke was into girls, the same Clarke who had wanted to go on a double date with Niylah. Clarke who got flushed in her presence.

Did that mean Lexa's feelings were returned? Well, there was one way to find out.

PRESENT

All her not-so-subtle tests had paid off, and she had gotten all the confirmation she needed from Clarke. With all her courage, she crossed the room and pulled her roommate in for a kiss. It was soft and gentle, just like Clarke was. Clarke responded, pressing her lips slowly against Lexa's.

Regretfully, Lexa pulled away to look Clarke in the eyes. "You have no idea how long I've been wanting to do that," she said breathlessly.

"I..." Clarke began. "I didn't think you liked girls. I thought-"

Lexa pulled her in for another kiss, silencing all her fears. Clarke wrapped her arms around her. It was clear that she had been wanting this too by the way she held on tightly.

Suddenly, Costia's lifeless face filled her mind, and she stumbled backwards, gasping. Clarke reached out to steady her, her eyes filled with concern. "Are you alright?" she asked.

"Yeah," Lexa lied. "Just got a sharp pain in my stomach."

Clarke's brow furrowed. "Do we need to get you to the nurse?" she asked with worry.

"No, no," Lexa assured her. "It's just menstrual cramps."

"Ah," Clarke said with a nod, looking relieved. "Well, I've got some Advil. Do you want some?"

"That'd be nice," Lexa said, playing the part. She even rubbed her side to keep up the lie. It was necessary. She finally had Clarke. She couldn't let the other girl see how broken she was now.

Clarke gently put two pills in her hand, and Lexa swallowed them with a bottle of water. "Thanks," she said, smiling. But it was fake. She knew no amount of Advil could take away the trauma she continued to face every day. Her past never seemed to leave her alone. Costia hung over her like a vengeful spirit, and Lexa couldn't blame her if she was. After all, she was the reason Costia was killed.

"So, uh, what does this mean for us?" Clarke asked nervously.

Lexa shoved Costia to the back of her mind. "Well, we're obviously into each other," she said. "And we've already got a date planned."

Clarke smiled. "So glad Niylah talked me into this," she said with a laugh. "I never thought we'd end up here though."

"Me either," Lexa replied. "But hey, this can only be a good thing, right?"

"Right," Clarke agreed.

Lexa's stomach was in knots. She didn't know how long she could keep up the charade of being okay.