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Zuko and Aang were gone for three days. When they returned from the Sun Warrior trip, they brought back news that was rather exciting, and revealing.
"You said the Masters' names were Ran and Shaw?" I asked, they nodded. "They were red and blue, right?"
"Yeah! How did you know?" Aang asked.
"Because Uncle Iroh always told the boys the story of the Foolish Prince." I muttered sitting back. "There once was a prince who wanted to become the greatest firebender there ever was. So he traveled to the ancient lands to seek out a master. But, he failed to find one who was better than himself. One day he was travelling along a mountain when he stumbled upon two dragons, one red and one blue. He knew them to be wise beings and asked them for help. When they offered to teach him, themselves, he laughed, he didn't believe that a dragon could teach him bending forms when they could only breath fire, which he also knew how to do. So, he left the dragons and continued to walk up the mountain. As he neared the top, he slipped and plummeted to the ground below, screaming for help. The dragons heard him and went to help him. They saved the prince, and in the end he accepted their offer, still doubtful that they could teach him anything. He learned from them, and his firebending became unbeatable, legendary even. Their names were Ran and Shaw." It was a summary of the full story, one that I was very familiar with.
"Uncle told you that story?" Zuko asked. I nodded.
"The boys even have Lu Ten's old stuffed dragons, both named Ran and Shaw." I said. "It's their favorite story, I've told them it a thousand times at least. All this time, it had been about Uncle learning from Ran and Shaw. He must have lied to protect them." Zuko nodded in agreement. We still hadn't discussed what had happened before he had left, or really none of the young teens had approached me about it.
Aang and Zuko commenced to show us the Dancing Dragon, which Sokka and Katara made fun of, much to Zuko's chagrin.
"Hey, isn't that what you were doing last night, Roka?" Haru asked. I nodded.
"Uncle taught me the Dancing Dragon form when I mastered firebending. He said that it would guide me through every form flawlessly, keeping my root firm and by balance unquestionable." I said as I poured a cup of tea. I was no where near the mastery of tea making that Iroh was, but I was decent enough to make Jasmine tea that even Uncle enjoyed.
"Why didn't you ever teach Azula and I?" Zuko asked as he took a seat with the rest of the group. Aang was still trying to get Appa to teach him some airbending forms.
"Because neither of you were true masters of the element. You didn't understand that fire was more than just a dangerous and destructive force. If that is your argument for why firebending is bad, then you will have to apply it to all the elements. Each element is deadly in it's own way. Waterbenders can bloodbend, earthbenders can metal and lavabend, they can also crush their opponent, literally, and airbenders are just as deadly, maybe even more so." I explained, which caught Aang's attention.
"What do you mean by that?" He asked. "Air Nomads were, are, the most peaceful people of the four nations."
"Yes, the Air Nomads were knowledgeable pacifists." I agreed. "But, not all airbenders in the past chose to follow the Air Nomad ways. There was an account, one I read in the Imperial Libraries, of an airbender who could suffocate her victims by bending the air out of their lungs. Bloodbending is scary, but so is stealing someone's breath."
"Whoa..." The Duke said, casting Aang a slightly fearful glance. "Benders are... Scary."
"Don't be afraid. You are surrounded by masters." I said. "To be a master of an element, you have to understand the consequences of losing control of your element, and yourself. Everyone is capable of doing dangerous, and even deadly things to other people. It doesn't matter if you're a bender or nonbender. Anyone can hurt anyone."
"... Like Jet." Sokka said, Katara flinched. "He was willing to sacrifice an entire village of innocent people to kill a bunch of Fire Nation soldiers."
"He hated the Fire Nation so much, that he had discovered Uncle and I were firebenders because Uncle heated up his tea when no one was looking, then he tried to prove it until he was arrested by the Dai Li." Zuko supplied another incident with this Jet character. Apparently I wasn't the only one who didn't know Jet, as The Duke, Teo, and Haru shared a look of confusion. Katara ended up telling us about Jet. His story was a reminder that bad people can come from anywhere.
We ate our lunch in relative peace afterwards. Then Zuko and Aang went off to train. It wasn't until late in the evening when Zuko came back to our shared room.
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Zuko didn't ever bring up my militant history when he came back from training Aang. He just cleaned up and went to bed, softly saying good night before he drifted off to sleep. It wasn't until the next morning that we actually spoke about my past.
"Why didn't you ever tell me, Roka?" Zuko asked as we cooked breakfast, Katara had taken Aang to practice waterbending, so I offered to cook this morning's food.
"I was ashamed of what I had done... I am ashamed of what I have done." I sighed as I stirred the noodles. "I've killed people, some would be your age now." I wasn't facing him, but I could sense the rising tension. "I never wanted you or Azula to know about it, especially our sister. She would have seen it acceptable. In fact, she probably would be fine killing someone now. But, it was never to deceive you, Zuko, but to protect you."
"...I understand." Zuko sighed. "The rice is boiling over." I rushed to save the main course.
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It was two weeks later when we woke up to find Zuko and Sokka gone on a fishing trip. It wouldn't be for another week until we saw the two older boys. During the time Zuko was gone, I made sure Aang's forms were correct so that he wouldn't start any bad habits. He was a strong bender, though fire did not come naturally to the timid boy. I would watch him from afar while sipping on tea.
"Go rest for now, Avatar." I said as Aang finished with his forms. He relaxed and sat down beside me. "Tea?" I offered, which he took.
"Princess Roka..." Aang started, unsure of how to approach whatever he wanted to ask.
"Yes, Avatar?" I replied, taking another sip of my chamomile tea.
"You said you have two sons... But, who is your husband? Where is he?" Aang finally blurted out. I was baffled for a moment, thinking that surely he already knew. But. the curiosity in his wide eyes was answer to my own doubts.
"You actually met my husband before." I said. I had to tread lightly because I didn't need Aang to think that he had inadvertently killed Zhao. "Admiral Zhao and I was married shortly after Zuko was banished. It was an arranged marriage. I had Lu Ten and Taiyou less than a year after we were married." I said. The look of sheer panic in Aang's face was amusing.
"Zhao is your husband!?" We turned around to see Katara and the others coming towards us, most likely wanting to see Aang practice. Or fight over what element he's to train with after fire.
"Was. Spirits have always been vengeful, and La is no different." I said. "I assumed you knew that Zhao was killed at the Northern Water Tribe because of your connection with the Spirit World and the Moon Spirit herself."
"I always wondered what happened to him." Katara muttered to herself. She glanced at me, curiosity growing on all their faces. "Did you love him?"
"No, we were acquaintances at most, the one thing we both cared for equally in our marriage are our sons." I said, pouring another cup of tea. "Zhao was not a good man. But, he was a decent father."
"I'm sorry for your loss." Aang mumbled.
"Don't be, if La didn't kill Zhao, I would have. What he did was unforgivable." I sniffed before taking a gulp of steaming tea. "Avatar, I'm sure your other masters are ready for their training session." I stood up quickly and dismissed myself. I felt uncomfortable talking about Zhao. It made me think of Tiayou and Lu Ten. It made me wonder if I would ever marry again.
I shook the thoughts from my mind and chose to meditate for the rest of the afternoon.
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It was the next day when Zuko and Sokka returned. It was quite the haul they brought in for being gone nearly two weeks. They brought with them a hijacked Fire Nation war ship and a group of newly escaped Fire Nation fugitives. But, they didn't bring any fish.
Katara was excited to see her father again. It was heartwarming to see the small family reunion. And Sokka had Suki, his girlfriend, as well. I was also relieved to not be the oldest anymore. It was definitely a huge weight off my chest now that I didn't feel completely responsible for eight of the most important teenagers in the world at the moment. I may be a mother of twins, but I was not looking forward to their teen years.
Zuko managed to get in a quick training session with Aang before we all ate dinner and laid down for the night, all of us deciding to just lay down in the main hall where we had eaten together.
I lay next to Zuko, who was tossing and turning for a good half hour before finally falling into a restless slumber. I couldn't help but wonder if Mai's confession was bothering him, if he was guilty for leaving her and Ty Lee at Azula's mercy after they had helped him and the others escape. I eventually fell asleep, shortly after praying to Agni that Lu Ten and Taiyou were safe and didn't miss me too much.
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Hey! So, been a week, got really busy it'll probably be a bit before next chapter is up. So, leave a review!