Author's Note: Aaaaand here we go! Straight in to Chapter Fourteen! First & foremost, I need to say thank you to everyone who's still keeping up with this story & enjoying it! I apologize for not responding to all the reviews from last chapter. These past couple of weeks have been crazy, but it's settling down & I've made it my personal mission to keep updates coming quickly over these last seven chapters. Because guys, we're getting into the meat of this thing. All I can say is: do you trust me? Trust me.

Always, always, always thank you to Court81981. I am awful, terrible, no good at all things grammar and she is such a trooper to put up with not only my medicare writings but my whining along the way. All the awards to her! Now go read all her stories. Right. Now.

And again, please remember: I did not attend OSU. I have never been to OSU so I'm keeping some of the details a bit vague because I'd rather them not be there than be there wrong. Also, I've taken some creative liberities with the game naratives. I know they don't normally do a ton of talking during the games, but for this story we're going to say that's commonplace. Deal? Deal.

Now enjoy!

Summary: There are also three types of people in Dawson, Texas: those who are trying to flee, those who embrace their small town fate, and the Mellarks. Mellark Ranch; largest cattle ranch South of Dallas, employer of ranch hand, Katniss Everdeen, and home of Ohio State Buckeye running back, Peeta Mellark. And Peeta Mellark is coming home today.

Lone Star State of Mine
Chapter Fourteen: Mine Would Be You

"What's the one regret you can't work through?"

Orgasms.

Books tell you they'll be like the heavens have opened up and the choirs are singing. Movies make every one out to be some longing reach for a passionate connection. Your peers tell you they'll be a toe-curling, life-changing experience. Your parents are still telling you the stork dropped you off at the front door. And of course, your solo performances tell you they're nothing more than a way to relieve some unforeseen tension. But then we all know most of the hype is simply friends trying to boost their own egos.

And they're all right. Well, except your parents. But give them credit, they're trying.

Okay, my experience is limited, but it is experience. And I can say without a shadow of a doubt that I've experienced each kind there is to be had. Peeta has brought me over the edge so many times in our short time together that I'm not sure how I ever survived without such pleasure existing in my daily routine. And each time is memorable for its own reason. Because Peeta is Peeta and he is perfection.

I can't make coffee in my house anymore without remembering the morning Peeta lifted me up on the counter while quickly removing my panties and sliding home within a matter of seconds. My nails dug angry marks into his bare shoulders and his teeth nipped just a little to hard at my collarbone. The moment was quick and perfectly rough. My orgasm flew through me like bright headlights, leaving me breathless, sleek with sweat, and completely satisfied.

Walking into Peeta's bedroom rekindles the memory of us spending the night on the floor. We had been walking around the ranch late one night when a sudden downpour hit. We instantly took off running toward the nearest shelter, and it had been the main house. His house. Fortunately for us, Mr. and Mrs. Mellark were out of town for the weekend and our loud entrance was unnoticed. We'd barely made it through the front door before I felt Peeta's arms coming around me, pulling me deep into a searing kiss. The path to his bedroom is still a blur of hot kisses and passionate pauses against the hallway walls.

My orgasm built up a slow burning fire before turning into a complete inferno, leaving me collapsed atop Peeta mumbling incoherent declarations.

The smell of freshly cut hay doesn't hit my nostrils without the familiar tightening in my stomach making its own appearance. It was mere days after our first time and my need for Peeta had never once been completely fulfilled. I needed him everywhere I went and on this particular afternoon seeing him working in the old hay barn without a shirt — he sure as hell knew what he was doing — was just too much. Taking a quick look around told me no one would see me slip in and sneak him up to the loft. Grabbing the nearest old horse clothe, I snuck up behind him and tugged him along with me. There was no foreplay, but I continually pulled him as close as possible — my hands on the side of his face as he kissed me senseless. The act itself was still a bit misguided and jumbled, but neither of us noticed. My orgasm came in like crashing waves, leaving me shaking and blissful.

And I know that after this morning I will no longer be able to hear the small squeak of an old headboard without remembering Peeta's impressive tongue or how tenderly he treats me.

He wakes me by peppering kisses along my shoulder before I feel his calloused fingertips ghostly trace down my spine. His lips soon follow to give wet, open-mouth kisses. By now I'm fully awake, but I haven't moved. I simply let the heat pool between my legs and enjoy the complete attention of the man I love. The man who, here in Ohio, is completely in his element. The thought is one I've tried to avoid for the last 24 hours, but today's the football game. Today it's all going to hit me dead on.

But not now.

Now I can pretend my usual fears aren't getting the best of me. Now I can feel Peeta's hand skim across my hip and start down my thigh, his lips still working their way down my back. At one point this would have sent my insecurities soaring, but with Peeta I feel like the most treasured jewel. Even my flaws are worshipped and there is nothing to hide.

I am still motionless until I feel Peeta playfully bite my ass and I can't help but giggle. I can feel his smile against my sensitive skin and his hand starts to work back up, landing on my hip to tug me over on my back. I easily let him and grin when I see the horrible case of bedhead he's sporting. It reminds me of our first morning together and my pulse quickens.

"Good morning," I mumble, reaching up to push one of his curls off his forehead.

"Not yet," He says, leaning down to kiss my neck just below my ear. "But it will be."

I don't have the opportunity to say another word before I feel the blankets pull away from my nude form and his lips lock around one of my tight nipples. My back arches to keep him close and the heat continues to build within me. I can tell by the way his tongue slowly laps at my sensitive buds that he's going to be torturously slow.

My craving for intimacy is higher than normal and I try not to allow the meaning behind that lurk into my mind, especially when Peeta is kissing a dangerously slow path to my core.

I comfortably spread my legs wider to allow him the access he is requesting. My eyes are locked on him in the bright morning light and I find myself imprinting every detail on my memory. The way his shoulder muscles tighten slightly when he slips one arm beneath my leg to move it to rest atop his back. The tanline he sports on his biceps. How perfectly intertwined our bodies look together. How his dark pink tongue darts out to lick my hipbone before disappearing between my dark curls. How my pleasurable sigh causes the hand resting on my thigh to squeeze tighter.

His motions make me want to allow my head to lull back and simply enjoy the amazing sensations, but the image in front of me does nothing but add to Peeta's talented tongue. I love seeing his naked form between my legs and I nearly come when I see his own hips buck instinctively against the sheets trying to cause the friction I know he so craves.

I do my best to keep my sounds of praise quiet, but soon it's becoming too much and I have to bite my lip to keep from calling his name for the entire block to hear. My hands are gripping the sheets when my orgasm finally takes over. It speeds through my veins and finally I allow my eyes to slam shut as my whole body tenses. I feel Peeta slowly kissing his way back up to me and when his lips meet mine I moan at the taste of myself. It's something I never thought I'd find so erotic, but there is nothing more pleasing to me than to know my taste is the only one to ever cross Peeta's lips.

My orgasm hasn't completely washed through me when I feel Peeta slowly enter me. My mouth immediately gapes open and I grip his shoulders tightly. His thrusts are shallow and slow, but they're exactly what I need as my first orgasm comes down while my second one simultaneously starts to build. His forehead is resting against mine and I realize this closeness is exactly what I need. I know by the way he grips my hips and the sharp breathes he takes that this moment won't last long, but I don't need it to as long as we remain this close.

Our chests are pressed together and during a particularly quiet moment I swear I can hear our heartbeats pounding in unison. My legs are wrapped tightly around Peeta, not allowing his thrusts to be more than the slow, shallow speed that he started with. My love for him falls from my lips like water and the way his words echo mine only help to rub my emotions completely raw.

My orgasm collides with his and the moment is strong and passionate. My hands are pressed around the back of his neck keeping mw close. I feel his hand holding tight to my thigh, pulling it up and allowing him to slip just that much deeper. My cries only grow louder then and my hips buck up toward his.

It feels like forever before I am able to catch my breath again, and slowly I open my eyes to see him looking down at me with those gorgeous, stormy blue eyes that I get lost in so often. His boyish grin is itching to stretch across his face, but he's waiting to see my reaction, and I just laugh quietly. The moment isn't something either of us expected. It was perfect.

"New pregame ritual?" I grin, my hand coming across his slick forehead before pulling him into a chaste kiss. "Good luck charm."

"I don't think it worked," Peeta says, his lips going to my jaw. "I'm pretty sure I won't be leaving this bed for a long time."

"Will you be missed?" I ask, already knowing the obvious answer.

"No, not at all." Peeta licks a drop of sweat I feel sliding down my temple.

"Liar."

"I'll lie, beg, borrow, or steal to stay here with you. Forever." Peeta says and his eyes are back on mine. They are so sincere that I feel my breath hitch in my throat. And the fear starts to lurk in like a Texas storm cloud. He would give all of this up for me. That's what he's tell me — or at least how I'm taking it — and the thought makes me physically sick. Back in Dawson — where my life will always be — he could have a decent life, but not like the one he would have if he stayed away from there. Ohio was his out. This place is the best thing that ever happened to Peeta.

Not me. He just doesn't realize it yet.

The Ohio State University stadium, like most this weekend, overwhelms me. I follow closely behind Johanna in fear I'll be forever lost in the sea of people, and watch closely to avoid bumping anyone. Although, that's a hopeless cause as I am treated more like a table hockey puck bouncing from one person to the next. And it's not just me; everyone seems to be doing that. I'm just the only one who seems to mind. Johanna walks ahead of me like a seasoned pro, her popcorn held high above her head to make sure it isn't dumped along the way. She smiles at some she knows, but doesn't let them deter her on her mission to us to our seats.

Soon I'm being swept through a tunnel that undoubted leads back outside to the actual field. The sight dwarfs me completely. The sea of red surrounds me, and I stop instantly. The field itself is empty of players, but the prep teams are hard at work to make sure everything goes off without a hitch. The crowd is still milling around, but most have found their seats and are waiting for the big event. My mouth dries as I think of Peeta playing in front of all these people. How he does it all the time. How his name is commonplace on SportsCenter when they're talking about college football. How this world seems complete even without me standing here.

"Mrs. Red!" Johanna calls, already climbing a set of nearby steps. "You going to stand there like a statue or do you want to sit with me?"

My eyes slowly pull away from the scene in front of me to look toward the voice calling my newly given nickname. Apparently I have Thresh to thank for this. Quickly I realize how in the way I am and start shortening the distance between Johanna and myself. Soon I'm behind her once again and she's leading us to two empty seats in the middle of what I assume is the student section.

"Johanna Fucking Mason!" A boy directly behind us calls above the crowd.

I immediately turn around to be met with the sight of a shirtless man painted in red, white and black wearing oversized sunglasses and a red Afro wig. And he's not the only one — apparently this is normal because there are at least a dozen dressed just as obnoxiously as him.

Johanna turns around and grins. "Blight. Not too hung over, I see?"

"Babe, please. I hold my alcohol much better than your scrawny ass does."

"Please," Johanna repeats, "Call me 'babe' one more time so I have a reason to knock your teeth in."

"Sassy. Wonder if that translate in bed," Blight continues, still screaming over the crowd. I feel my face turning red at the awkward conversation, but Johanna just laughs.

"Guess you'll have to ask my boyfriend," She says, turning back around to face the field.

"Jo, you wound me," Blight says with a hand over his heart.

Before the conversation can continue, the music coming over the speakers dies and a large, booming voice replaces it as the fans automatically start going wild.

"Good afternoon Buckeyes!" The voice fills the stadium over the cheers. "Welcome to another gorgeous day at Ohio Stadium where our beloved Buckeyes will be taking on the Wisconsin Badgers. My name is Caesar Flickerman and I'm here with Claudius Templesmith — say hello to the amazing fans, Claud."

"Hi, yes, hello." A much smaller voice fills the air and everyone around gives a small laugh at the change in demeanor of the two. "Welcome to —"

"Ah yes, and here come the Wisconsin Badgers!" Caesar interrupts Claudius' introduction easily, and my attention turns toward the large team running out onto the field. Everyone around me remains rather quiet, expect for the occasional "boo" coming from a drunken frat boy. All around, most seem rather unimpressed by the opposing team, but Caesar continues easily. "The Badgers will undoubtedly prove to be a worth opponent for the Bucks with their current record of 3 and 1. Isn't that right, Claud?"

"Exactly, Caesar. The Badgers have proven to have a fantastic running game this year and they'll definitely make the Bucks work for their win today. It's going to be a fantastic game."

"That is is, Claud. That it is," Caesar agrees smoothly.

And then the crowd starts to erupt in applause. My eyes go toward the opposite entrance of where the Badgers just came from and I see four men running across the field with large flags that spell "OHIO." The crowd instantly turns up the volume as the cheerleaders and band members line up on either side of the tunnel, a large banner being held above.

"Now, ladies and gentlemen, it's time to get on your feet and welcome your undefeated OSU Buckeyes!" Caesar's booming voice is hardly audible over the crowd's relentless cheers.

My heart skips a beat when I look up at the animated screen to see a rather intimidating looking photo of Peeta flash across it. I believe I hear the cheers from the female fans get a little bit louder then and my stomach turns uncomfortably. But I can't help but smile when I look back on the field and see the familiar '29' jersey leading the pack onto the field.

"Our Bucks are being lead by quarterback, Mitchell Howard and running back, Peeta Mellark. Mellark is easily closing in on the OSU rushing record and I may be speaking a bit out of turn, but I believe I see NFL in this young man's near future." Caesar talks like a proud papa over the speakers while the crowd continues to scream. "There is nothing stopping this kid."

He's wrong. I am. I'm stopping him. Not intentionally, but I can see the difference. Peeta's focus is no longer on football and making something of himself. His postcards usually end with counting down the days until he returns to Dawson. When he talks about the future it's about living in Dawson. It's about having me by his side. He knows I'd never survive the publicity of dating some kind of football legend. I wasn't cut out for that kind of life and it's like he's made it his unspoken mission to never make me chose between him or sanity.

My clapping ceases without me knowing it and my arms are crossed as my thoughts pull me deeper into this doubt I've been struggling to ignore. The crowd around me doesn't seem to notice, not even Johanna, who is still cheering among the loudest, making her presence known as she continually chants Peeta's name. She's proud of him and when I look at the huge smile on her face as they list off his accomplishments I can see that. And everyone else cheers at the mention of his name as well. Here he is some kind of star. Outside of Dawson he has the world at his fingertips.

Am I holding him back from that?

"Look at your man!" Johanna screams over the crowd. "He's like some kind of football god!"

I smile, but my inner turmoil doesn't allow me to really celebrate that fact. She's right. This is his talent. This is where he belongs and I'll always be on the sidelines because I'll never fit in here. Sure, I can cheer for him and smile at his accomplishments. But being the center of attention never works out well for me. Peeta is meant to be the face the crowds adore. I am meant to be in the shadows.

Who are we trying to kid?

"And that's the half! With our Buckeyes up by 16, we'll be back to see if they can hang on to that strong lead shortly," Caesar announces as both teams start to head toward their respective locker rooms. "Now refill your drinks, grab an extra hotdog for yours truly, and meet us back here for an outstanding performance from the band!"

Johanna leans forward in her seat and looks over at me, "You alright?"

"Yeah, why?" I ask, knowing I spent most of the first half practically brooding.

"So you're always this stoic watching an exciting college football game?" Johanna removes her bug-eyed sunglasses and continues to watch me. "I call bullshit."

Like she would even begin to understand if I were to tell her the truth. I hardly understand myself. I'm over-thinking it all and I know it, but that doesn't stop it from being the truth. Johanna doesn't understand Peeta the way I do. He's as self-sacrificing as I am self-sabotaging. If he even begins to think I doubt us in any way he'll toss everything he can to the side to prove himself. He doesn't realize it's not him that I'm concerned about. It's me.

"Hungover," I mumble, glancing down at the concrete floors beneath my feet.

"Ah, strenuous activities led into this morning, didn't they?" Johanna smirks. "Say no more, but I thought Peeta was playing with an extra pep in his step this afternoon."

I look over at her, pushing my braid over my shoulder. She looks back at the field for a second, popping several pieces of now rather stale looking popcorn into her mouth. She chews for a moment and then glances back at me.

"It's because of you," She says and then stands up to stretch.

It's almost as if she understood the thoughts running through my head and needed to cause something to break some sense into it all. But she couldn't possibly. I haven't known Johanna long enough for her to really understand me. Especially without a word being shared on the topic.

Slowly I take her lead and stand up as well, rolling my neck as I realize just how uncomfortable those stadium chairs are. Most people around us are either wandering around visiting with other students or have left the arena entirely only to return for the second half. I'm half daydreaming as I watch the crowd when I hear Johanna let out an annoyed groan beside me.

"Great. How did I know she'd find us?" Johanna mumbles, running her hand over her face.

My attention is drawn in the direction she's looking where I see two girls climbing the steps. One has long dark hair and she wears a permanent sour like expression on her lips. The other, walking ahead of Lemon Drop, has long blonde hair and fair features. By all accounts she's stunning.

"Why? Who —"

"Johanna, long time no see!" the blonde calls, finally reaching our row and walking passed the several empty seats.

"Delly." Johanna greets coldly, sliding her hands into her back pockets. "Has it been that long? Guess when you're avoiding someone it goes by pretty quick."

"And you must be Katniss," Delly says with a smile, obviously ignoring Johanna's comment.

"Nice to meet you." I nod, suddenly remembering Johanna's roommate. The roommate Peeta dated for a while. The roommate whose name was most certainly Delly.

"Likewise." She grins, the sweetness practically oozing from her lips. She turns behind her to point toward the other girl with her. "This is Enobaria, a friend of mine."

My attention goes to the girl behind her and I give a small smile and a wave. I nearly have to do a double take when I see the girl grin. Her teeth are rather jagged and I have to wonder if she had that done on purpose or she was born looking like Dracula.

"Ohio's resident vampire." Johanna leans forward as if to whisper to me, but says it loud enough for all around to hear.

"How long have you and Peeta been together?"

"Take a hike, Delly." Johanna cuts in before I can respond. "Last time I checked, second-time-around skank really wasn't his style."

"Retract the claws, Johanna." Delly smiles, still as sweet as ever. "I'm simply meeting the girl everyone on campus has been hearing about."

"Everyone?" I ask, my voice betraying me as he cracks slightly.

"Of course, Silly!" Delly says, and Enobaria giggles behind her. "Everyone wants to know about the girl who took OSU's most eligible bachelor off the proverbial market. You know, at least temporarily. We all know those football boys have very short attention spans."

"Shut your mouth, Delly, before I shut it for you." Johanna continues, stepping closer to me as if she's simply waiting for me to give the go ahead before she knocks the girl to the ground.

"I think I'm keeping his attention just fine, but thanks for the concern," I respond.

"Ah new love," Delly says, placing her hands over her heart affectionately. "Good luck with that. Maybe you'll last until Christmas. But then again —"

"Delly, I swear to god," Johanna starts forward, only being stopped by my arm coming up in front of her. "Leave now before I throw you on the field to be tackled in the first play."

"I'd get new friends if I were you, Katniss. Boys don't like angry bitches." Delly smiles, starting to turn and leave. "Oh, and tell Peeta I'll see him next Monday for our study session."

I blink and watch as the two girls start down the steps again. The crowd is just quiet enough that I can hear Enobaria laugh and say, "Well at least we know the competition is low." And then they disappear into one of the nearby tunnels leading outside of the arena.

"They're full of shit." Johanna shakes her head, replacing her sunglasses over her eyes. "Peeta only sees Delly in one class. Of nearly 150 people. They don't even talk. He can't stand her."

"How long were they together?" I ask, still watching the place where they disappeared from.

"Like two months? Three maybe?" Johanna shrugs, taking a seat. "But Delly has been wagging her tongue in Peeta's direction ever since. She's a real treat, if you couldn't tell."

"Obviously." I mumble.

My thoughts aren't on Delly. My intimidation doesn't even come from Delly. She's obviously not even a threat, but it hits me again that this type of thing will always be around Peeta on this path. The path I know that he should the take. The path that I know will undoubtedly give him the most happiness. This was just another way to prove to myself that I don't really belong here. I can't really handle jealous girls like Delly. I can hardly handle simply bitchy girls like Clove and Glimmer. I'm better off in solitude, living under the radar. In this life with Peeta, I'll never be under the radar.

"I'm — I need to get some air." I quickly start down the row toward the steps.

"Katniss?" Johanna calls. "Are you alright? Do you want me to come with you?"

I'm already halfway down the steps before I hear her words. I don't look back; I simply push through the crowd. This time I can't care less about the people I run into. The realization is suffocating and it's all I can think about. Coming to see Peeta was all I could think about in the weeks leading up to it. I missed him so much that I got caught up. I forgot the rest of the world existed and now it was smacking me in the face. Our paths are heading in two very different directions and sooner or later one of us is going to have to turn.

Again, trust me babes.