Author's Notes: So I got this job that is basically an at home job, only during working hours I can't be on the internet. So I broke out my notebook and wrote this chapter. I got it typed up and mailed it to scribeninja who did some uber fast beta'ing on it. And now I'm posting it. Consider this my apology for even thinking that I could take a break from this fic. I love it too much. I will try to post at least once a week, but I'm not promising anything. STK gets prioty. But enough of that, I present THE TALK chapter.

Disclaimer: I do not own SVM or the characters. I just like to torture them.

It's Your Song

Chapter Fourteen

Living and dying with the choices I made.

~Choices by George Jones

SPOV

With my hands on my hips, I glared at the man sprawled on my bed. At least, I tried to glare. It was hard to maintain the angry look when Alcide looked completely at home on top of my blankets. He looked so sexy and relaxed that my libido went into overdrive. My body screamed at me to drop the towel and jump into bed with him. I started mentally reciting the skeletal system of a cat to keep myself in control.

"Funny," I said from the bathroom doorway with my head cocked to the side, "I don't remember inviting you to my bed."

Alcide actually had the nerve to grin at me. "I figured it was the only way I could get you to talk to me."

"We never talked much in bed so that logic is wasted," I replied as dryly as I could.

"No, we preferred to do other things with our mouths as I remember now."

Memories of what he could do with that mouth flared in my mind and heat raced through me. Carefully avoiding his gaze, I turned towards the closet. "Don't go there."

"Sorry," he said quickly, and he sounded like he really meant it.

I stared blankly into the closet, clutching my towel close. I was feeling very vulnerable at the moment. "I'm not going to play games with you, Alcide."

"I'm not here to play games, Sookie. Honest. I'm sorry."

Why was I even looking in the closet? My pajamas weren't in there. I moved to my dresser and pulled out a pair of underwear and my summer sleepwear, shorts and a tank top. Then I finally turned and stared at Alcide. "Fine. You're sorry. I'm sorry. We done here? I'd like to get dressed and get some food."

"No, we aren't done, but feel free to get dressed. We can talk while you eat."

I narrowed my eyes. "Thank you so much for your permission to get dressed... in my room. Get out."

His eyes met mine. "I don't think so."

I'm pretty sure if it was possible, I'd have been shooting daggers out my eyes at him. "You might want to rethink that thought."

"I'm not leaving your side until we talk."

I cocked my head to the side and tapped my foot impatiently. "I don't remember you being this intrusive and pushy."

"I don't remember you ever being scared to talk to someone," he shot back as he sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. "The Sookie I knew never ran."

"Wanting some privacy in my own bedroom isn't running."

"When you are going to use it as an excuse not to talk to me it is running."

I glared at him. Alcide glared back. I could have gone into the bathroom to get dressed, bBt this was my room and I'd be damned if I let him run me out of it. Not looking away from his face, I let my towel drop to the floor. Alcide's eyes went wide as he took in my naked body, and there were glimmers of arousal in his eyes as he watched me pull on my panties, tank, and shorts. I could feel his eyes raking over my body, and I saw the approval there. Good, so he liked my body, that was just great.

Only when I was dressed did I go back into the bathroom to brush out my wet hair. He didn't follow. Thank God. From where he was sitting, he couldn't see the way my hand shook as I dragged the brush through my hair. The way those green eyes had gone hot with lust had almost made me pant with my own . I may have looked calm and indifferent, but I had been battling my own lust, especially when I saw the way his erection had strained against the denim he wore.

Well that was a train of thought I didn't need to follow. If we were going to have this talk, I shouldn't be thinking about his dick. I was distracted enough. Hell, I didn't even know why we had to talk. I thought we had covered it all the last time he had been here. He was mad and upset, and wasn't sure he would forgive me. I was sorry, and regretted what I did. We agreed that he could see Justin, and once the time was right we'd both tell Justin the truth about his parentage. What more needed to be discussed? The only way to find out would be to go back out there.

So I did, and Alcide was still on the bed, waiting for me. Guess he was serious about not leaving my side. I sighed and gestured to the door. "We'll talk in the kitchen."

He followed me out without a word. Seeing me naked must have robbed his ability to speak. I stopped outside of Justin's room. "I just want to check on him real quick."

Alcide leaned against the door frame as I went in. In the time that Alcide had left him in bed, Justin had moved around so that he was sprawled across the entire mattress, blankets tangled around him. With a mother's skill, I untangled him and pulled his jeans off. Smiling, I pulled the light sheet up over his legs and then moved the guitar to the foot of the bed. I gave him a soft kiss on the forehead before turning to leave. Alcide was watching me with an unreadable expression. His eyes flicked to Justin, making me think of how sweet the two of them had looked sleeping together on the couch and I had to swallow hard because of the lump that formed in my throat.

"You make it look so easy," he commented quietly as I walked past.

I shrugged as I walked down the hallway. "Practice."

The kitchen was empty as we walked into it. Alcide picked up a note that had been laying on the table with a set of keys. To his truck, I assumed. He read it and looked at me. "Amelia and Tray took Quinn back to our place."

So he was already calling the old house his place. That said a lot, most importantly that he planned on staying for an extended amount of time.

It was just going to be us and Justin in the house. The perfect family moment, if we were a family. Knowing Ames, she'd talk Tray into going and staying at the apartment at the garage to give us all the privacy we needed. While I wished for their support, I supposed it was best that they were gone. I couldn't use them as crutches forever.

Alcide put the note down as I opened the fridge to get out the leftovers. When I saw the cake that took up most of the bottom shelf, I leaned back in surprise. "What's with the cake? It hasn't been touched."

"Justin decided that he didn't want to have cake without you," Alcide answered from behind me. Startled by how close he was, I turned and rammed right into his chest. I squeaked as his arms came up to steady me. The skin on skin contact where his fingers touched my arm was like a brand. I felt it all the way down to my toes.

Oh boy. This was too much contact. Being this close to Alcide was sending every reasonable thought I had out the window. From the half pleased, half pained look on his face, Alcide was feeling the same as me. Oh boy.

We jumped away from each other. Alcide rammed his side into the counter in his attempt to put distance between us and I banged back into open fridge door. We yelped and cursed at the same time.

"Shit!"

"Damn!"

There was a pause and then we both started to laugh. It was just so awkward that it was hilarious. I motioned for him to keep it down so we wouldn't wake up Justin with our laughter. By the time I stopped laughing, I was clinging to the fridge to stay upright. My sides ached and I sucked in a breath and said, "This is just stupid. What are we going to do? We can't make this work if we are going to be so jumpy around each other."

"I know," Alcide replied as he sat down at the table.

"So," I began as I made myself a burger, "what do you want to talk about."

Alcide stared at me like I was a buffle brained idiot. "What do you think we need to talk about?"

I shrugged and rolled my eyes. "The greenhouse affect? Your chances of being Entertainer of the Year? I don't know. I thought we took care of everything before you left."

"You know we haven't."

I pointed at him with the knife I used to spread the mustard on my burger. "Yes we have. You know the truth about Justin. You want to, and will, spend time with him. You'll have parental rights. The end."

"And us?" he asked with an arched brow.

I squashed down the hope that he had forgiven me. It was foolish to think that he had so soon. I laid down the knife and said evenly, "You made it quite clear that there wasn't an 'us' anymore, Alcide."

"Is that what you want, Sookie?"

"What I want is for my son, our son, to be happy. That's the only thing that matters to me." I picked up the burger and put it back down without taking a bite. "It won't do us or Justin any good to bring all this up again. You can't forgive me and I can't forgive myself for what I did." I wasn't hungry anymore and now I was feeling more tired than before. "Let's just agree to be friends and be done with it."

Alcide had remained quiet the entire time I spoke. Even when I put the untouched burger in the fridge he didn't say anything. I guess he couldn't disagree with anything I said and agreeing would just be redundant since I knew he agreed. I grabbed a bottle of water and picked at the label as I waited for him to say something, anything.

"It isn't that I can't forgive you, Sookie," Alcide said as he stared at the table. "I don't know if I should."

"You shouldn't," I replied softly. "I took something precious from you, something that can't be given back no matter what I do. I thought about it a lot over the week and I don't deserve forgiveness."

That caught him off guard, and he looked at me in confusion. "Shouldn't you be trying to convince me that you should be forgiven?"

I sighed, and felt a lot older than my twenty-eight years. "I can't make you do anything. You are an adult and capable of making your own decisions. Whatever you decide, you have to do it on your own."

Alcide leaned back in his chair. "This isn't exactly what I expected to happen here."

He sounded disappointed and surprised. I rolled my eyes. "Did you expect me to throw myself at your feet, confess that I still love you, that you should forgive me instantly because of that, and beg you to take me back?"

From the look on his face, it was exactly what he had been expecting. Lucky for him he didn't say yes or nod to confirm it, but his face still said it all. I laughed, I couldn't help it, and it wasn't a friendly laugh. "You were the one who wanted to talk. Shouldn't you be the one to beg for forgiveness?"

He crossed his arms over his chest and demanded, "For what? I didn't do anything wrong."

"Oh really?" I drawled tightly. "Did it ever occur to you once, just once, that you could call and see how I was doing? To see how I was coping without Gran?" I paused and looked down at the water bottle in my hand. "Obviously you felt something towards me when Gran died since you came back to be with me that night. Given that, I don't understand why you never called."

"You left without saying goodbye. You left a note saying that you couldn't do this again," Alcide snapped.

I raised my head to look at him. "I was emotionally distraught. My grandmother had just died and you came waltzing back into my life after five years. I still loved you back then and I couldn't bear to watch you walk out of my life again, Alcide. So yes, I walked first to protect myself."

Tears stung my eyes as I vented. Alcide was looking at me with a mixture of regret, sorrow, and distress. I couldn't stand seeing him look at me like that so I turned away. He spoke softly after several long moments and the words were like a knife through my heart. "I wasn't going to walk again, Sookie."

I looked up slowly, not trusting what I had just heard. "What?"

He cleared his throat and whispered, "I wasn't going to walk. That night, when you slept in my arms, I decided that I was going to stay. I was going to tell you in the morning, but when I woke up you were gone."

I couldn't breathe by the time he finished. My chest felt like it was made out of stone. I struggled to pull air into my lungs as I stared at him. His admission hung between us like a big elephant. I couldn't believe what he had told me and he looked like he couldn't believe he admitted it. Neither one of us said anything, we just looked at each other.

Alcide wouldn't have walked out of my life back then. He had wanted to stay with me. I had walked away from him because I assumed he would go back to Nashville. I had been so afraid of being hurt again when I already felt like my world was shattering. If I had stayed, everything would have played out so differently.

"You-," I shook my head to clear my thoughts, "You were going to stay?"

He nodded slowly. "Yes. I loved you, and the thought of leaving you again killed me."

I leaned back against the counter and fought back tears. "You never called or came after me."

"You made your choice. I thought that you didn't want me, and that's why you left. I was an idiot. I should have gone after you. I regretted that I didn't from the moment I got back to Nashville. Why do you think I wrote that song, Sookie?"

That admission was all it took to lose the fight against the tears. They rolled down my cheeks hot and fast. My shoulders shook as I buried my head in my hands. I heard the scratch of the chair leg against the floor and then Alcide was wrapping his arms around me. He pulled me against his firm body as I shook my head. I cried into his chest, weeping for the pain and loss we caused each other.

His voice was a deep rumble in my ear. "Don't cry Sookie, we both made mistakes."

My eyes hurt and my throat burned when I pulled back. Alcide was watching me carefully, unsure of what I would do next in my emotional breakdown. His arms and hands were a comforting warmth around me. His head was tilted down towards me, his lips so close to mine. All I had to do was lean up and we'd be kissing. It would be so easy to kiss him and pull him back to my room and go from there. He wanted me, I could see it in his eyes and feel it in his touch. I knew without a doubt if I made that move he wouldn't protest or stop me.

Because I wanted it so much that I could almost feel his hands skimming down my naked body I pulled away and said, "We've made enough mistakes. Let's not add another to that list."

"How do you know it would be a mistake?" he asked in a husky tone.

I met his eyes and saw my own lust reflected in his eyes. "Because I know you haven't forgiven me and I won't have you blaming me in the morning."

"Sookie-," he started.

I shook my head and cut him off. "No. Neither one of us is ready. Right now, all that is open to us is a friendship."

Alcide sighed and I knew I had won. He took a step back and then another, putting more distance between us. With each step away from me, the tension in the air eased. When he was back by the table, I let out a sigh of relief. If he hadn't backed off when he did, I would have thrown myself into his arms and the hell with the consequences. Now I could think clearly and easily since we weren't pressed together.

My voice was shaky but I managed to talk. "Let's just end the night now. You go on home, and I'm going to go to bed. I'm tired."

What I really wanted to do was curl up on my bed so I could cry, not sleep. I wish he had never told me that he wanted to stay. Knowing that just made everything worse.

Alcide studied my face for a long moment, and I was careful to keep expression blank. Finally he said, "Friends... for now."

He stood up as I stared at him in confusion, trying to figure out what he had meant. He grabbed the keys to his truck and went to the back door. He stopped in the doorway and looked over his shoulder at me. "Sookie." When I looked at him, he gave me a slow smile full of promises and heat. "I've already decided that when the time is right, I can forgive you. Then all bets are off on this friendship."

He left, closing the door behind him quietly. I was still looking at the door in shock over his words before I realized he was gone. I heard a truck rev up and then drive off, and.I was still staring at the door like an idiot. Did he mean what I thought he meant? I thoughtino. It still did nothing to ease the emotional pain I felt, but it did make me feel a little bit better.

I checked on Justin one last time before going into my room and getting into bed. I stared up at the ceiling, crying quietly, until exhaustion finally dragged me under. I still didn't know what I was going to do about Alcide.

Author's Notes: This chapter is the shortest chapter so far in IYS. I'm amazed I wrote something that wasn't 5k+ words. Anyway, there you go. It's all out on the table. The next few chapters are going to be interesting as hell. Thanks for reading.