A/N You all are amazing. It can't be said enough. Thank you so much for sticking with me and reading this story. I hope you enjoy this chapter.
I posted some FAQs on my profile, and answered the questions that I'm obviously asked a lot.
Thanks to Jessi for being the most amazing twin/friend/wifey. This chapter is kind of short...sorry....

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, just this storyline**

I see your face in my mind as I drive away,
Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way.
People are people,
And sometimes we change our minds.
But it's killing me to see you go after all this time.
Music starts playing like the end of a sad movie,
It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see.
Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down,
Now I don't know what to be without you around.
And we know it's never simple, never easy.
Never a clean break, no one here to save me.
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand,
And I can't breathe,
Without you but I have to,
Breathe, without you,
But I have to.
 - Taylor Swift "Breathe"

-----

I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and took it out, realizing that I had just received a text. I sighed as I opened my phone to view it.

B, we NEED 2 talk!! Plz meet me at my house! - J

I closed my eyes and bit my lip. Fuck. I know I shouldn't, but why do I want to go over there so badly?

Because you want answers.

What's he going to tell me that I don't already know?

What happened with him and Alice? What happened with him and you?

"What's wrong?" Edward asked, causing me to jump slightly as I opened my eyes and looked over at him.

"Jake wants me to meet him at his house to talk," I whispered, "and I kind of want to go over to talk with him."

"Are you sure about that? Can you handle seeing him today after what just happened with Alice?" I could hear the undercurrent of anger in his voice.

"Yes." I nodded.

He rubbed his eyes with the ball of his palms and sighed. "If you're sure…"

"I am."

I think…

No, I know I'm sure.

Ahh, I hope I'm doing the right thing!

He sighed deeply and drove towards Jake's house, not saying a single word to me. I felt like my heart was going to beat out of my chest as we got closer.

Should I be doing this? Should I? I just… I don't know what to do! I need to know that he didn't know anything about this. If he did, he wouldn't have been with Alice right?

"Edward… Am I doing the right thing?"

"Do you think you are?"

"I don't know," I took a deep breath. "I just want to hear him say that he didn't know anything about this. That if he had, he wouldn't have been with Alice, you know?"

"I understand you need answers. I just don't understand why you want to put yourself through something like this, especially after what just happened," he spoke quietly.

"I need to do this. I need to talk to him." I said, completely making up my mind. "If I don't, I know that I'll regret it."

Edward nodded in understanding as he headed towards Jake's house. The ride was way too short, and my nerves were working overtime. When we pulled up into the driveway, Jake was already standing outside. As Edward put the car in park, he whispered, "Last chance" to me before shutting it off.

"I'm okay." I whispered back, unbuckling myself and maneuvering my way out of the car, reaching for my crutches. I leaned against the car trying not to lose my balance when I felt a strong pair of arms wrap around me.

"Bella, what happened? I just saw you last night!" Jake exclaimed, trying to get the crutches out of the backseat for me.

"It's your fault." Edward growled at Jake, as he battled with him over who would get the crutches out first.

Jake looked at me, the confusion obvious in his eyes.

"After I left, I called Edward and then got carjacked when I went to meet him," I explained. "But I'm not here to talk about that. I'm here to hear what you have to say, and to have you answer some of my questions."

"That's fine. Would you like to go inside?" he asked.

I looked over at Edward. He shrugged, so I nodded.

Jake led the way inside, while Edward made sure I didn't trip over anything. Once we made it through the door, I made a beeline over to the couch, remembering what had taken place the last time I had been there. The laughter, joking, and lust were now replaced with fear, pain, and regrets. I sat down and tried to push all those thoughts out of my mind. Edward sat next to me, while Jake took the chair facing me.

This isn't good. I can't do this. Fuck, what was I thinking?

"Are you alright?" Edward asked, leaning over and placing his arm around me.

I am really starting to hate him asking me that. "Mhm," I mumbled.

"Let me begin by saying, I am so sorry, Bella. I promised you long ago that I wouldn't hurt you, but I did." Jake said. "And I never meant to let things get this far."

"How long?" I asked quietly.

"How long?"

"How long have you been with Alice?" Her name left a bitter taste in my mouth.

"Um… It's been complicated," he replied.

"Complicated how? How hard is it to just tell me?"

"This isn't easy."

"It's never simple. It's never easy. Nothing is. Just tell me!" I knew I was begging, but I didn't care.

"We had been seeing each other off and on while I was seeing you."

I gasped.

"It started out just hanging out as friends, and when you went all 'missing person' on me, that's when things really started happening."

"And by 'really started happening' you mean…?"

"We started having sex," he said, looking down.

No surprise there, I expected as much.

Doesn't mean it doesn't hurt though.

"Did you think that you could keep it from me?"

"We didn't think it would really turn into anything. I thought for sure that it would be a quick fling, and that we wouldn't ever have to tell you. We agreed not to."

I could feel myself growing angry, and I knew that Edward could feel it radiating off of me. He started rubbing soothing circles on my back trying to calm me down. "You both agreed not to tell me?!" I exclaimed.

"When you saw us in that restaurant, we were really saying good-bye."

"Um, quite a good-bye if you ask me. It certainly didn't sound or look like one! Did you know about what Alice did? Did you know?"

Please say no. Please, please, please say no.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Did you know that she drove Jasper away? That she got him hooked on drugs, and that he became a dealer to support her?"

He looked dumbfounded. "No. No I didn't. Are you sure? Is that what she told you?"

"It's what she told me before I came over here. Why would you want to hurt me Jake? Why would you turn to Alice and keep it from me? Just… why?"

"I didn't want to hurt you."

"Well you did."

"Can we at least talk about this? Make it right? I don't want to lose you."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "You already lost me. When you decided to get together with her, you lost me. I know that we weren't officially 'dating' or whatever, but I was really starting to fall for you. You missed your chance."

"I was falling for you too, Bella. I was the one who decided to end things with Alice. She was the one who leaned in for the good-bye kiss…,"

"And you didn't stop her!" I exclaimed, interrupting him. "You deepened it. I was there. I saw you two together."

He ran his fingers through his hair. "You don't understand, Bella. When we were at your apartment and saw us talking together, I really wanted to end it there, but I thought that if I did, you would hear me breaking things off. Like I said, we didn't want you to know about it."

"That's dumb. Really, it is. I just don't understand your way of thinking. I would've found out about it eventually. The things that we don't want others to know, usually makes themselves known." Whether we like it or not.

"I never meant to hurt you," he said again.

"Edward, I want to leave now." I said. He stood up and helped me off the couch, leading the way towards the front door.

"Bella. I'm sorry." I heard the pain in Jake's voice and I didn't want to look at him. "Don't go."

I turned to face him, to get my point across. "I'm sorry, Jake. I'm sorry that I'm losing you, and I'm sorry that you're losing me. You made the choice here; I didn't. And it hurts too much to see your face and hear your voice. I need to make this a clean break. You can't save me anymore. You can't be my rock. I can't breathe without you, but I have to. I'm… I…," I broke down crying. "I can't do this," I whispered quietly. "Good-bye Jake. I'll miss you."

His hand reached out for mine and held onto it trying to stop me. "Don't do this, Bella. Please, don't. You're my best friend. I need you too. I promised you that I would never leave, and I've kept that promise. Please don't leave me."

"I have no reason to stay with you, Jake."

"I can give you a reason to stay. Please don't go."

I shook my head, the tears clouding my vision. "I have to" I said, turning away, my hand slipping from his. "It's better this way. It really is."

I felt my heart break with every move I made, leaving behind the one thing that had made me whole. I looked up at Edward and noticed that his eyes showed nothing but compassion. "Please," I whispered. "Please don't let me down. Please make me whole again."

He nodded as he pulled me into a tight embrace. "I promise, Bella. I promise."

We got into the car and drove away, but all I could see in my mind was Jake's face, the brokenness and the pain, and I wondered if I looked as bad as he did.

Why does life have to hurt so much? Why does it revolve around pain? Just… why?

Turning to face Edward, I took a deep breath. "Edward, is there somewhere that we can go to be alone? I need to be alone with you now. I don't want to go back to the house where Rose is."

He looked at me confused. "We can go grab lunch or something."

"No. I want to be alone. Can we go to a hotel room or something? We can talk, or just watch television and order room service. I just don't want to be around anyone else." I begged.

I watched him as he contemplated my question. "Yes, I'll grab a room so that we can be alone. Are you sure this is what you want?"

I nodded.

I really need to feel needed. Am I going to do this? Will he agree to this?

My heart was beating rapidly as we drove once again in silence. That seemed to be a theme.

He pulled up to a nice hotel and put the car in park. "I'll be right back. I'll go in and get a room, and then I'll come out to get you."

"Okay." I sat there trying to figure out how to put my plan into motion. Whenever I had been hurt by someone and needed to be shown that I was wanted, I turned to sex, and I knew that it wasn't a good idea, but I didn't care. I needed to feel something. I needed to be needed.

Edward returned, parked in one of the marked stalls for hotel patrons only and helped me out. He led me through the hotel lobby to the elevator, taking me to the room. As he opened the door and ushered me in, I found myself in awe.

"Edward, I didn't mean that you had to get an amazing suite for us. I just wanted to be alone with you," I said.

"I know, but I just wanted it to be nice. I want everything to be nice for you. You deserve it," he said, smiling at me.

We looked into each other's eyes and knew right then and there that there was no going back.

He knows why I told him to take me here. This is really going to happen.

He started kissing me passionately, running his tongue along my jaw. My breathing became heavy, and I couldn't believe that this was actually going to happen. The kissing soon turned into something slow and sweet as he lifted me up and placed me softly onto the bed.

He pulled the blankets back and made sure I was comfortable as he tenderly undressed me. It was a bit awkward with my cast, but he made sure to lift my leg gently as he pulled my shorts and panties off.

"Are you sure you want this?" he asked as he began to undress himself.

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life."

Horny bitch.

You've wanted this for as long as I have.

That's because I am you, stupid.

Whatever. At least I'm going to finally just fuck Edward and get it over it.

Paying a great deal of attention to my breasts, he began licking and sucking gently, playing with my nipples until he had me panting and awkwardly spreading my legs. He moved his very talented mouth and tongue lower and licked and sucked on my swollen clit, causing me to grasp at the blanket and anything else I could get my hands on, arching my back. I was writhing and begging, panting, covered in a sheen of sweat. I was ready to scream with frustration, while Edward seemed to be calm and relaxed.

He used his fingers as his tongue sucked and licked me some more, then he thrust them in and out slowly as he looked up at me through hooded eyes. I cried out and felt myself let go as he began to thrust his tongue into me. I tangled my fingers in his hair and held on to it so tightly that I was afraid I was going to hurt him.

That tongue. Those fingers. Oh God. I need him in me. Now!

"Edward, please…," I begged, trying to get my breathing under control.

"Please what, Bella?" he asked, teasing me and licking me again, rubbing his fingers on my clit.

Oh God, I feel like I'm going to cum again. This man has magical fingers and tongue.

I let out a strangled groan and tried to form words. "Edward, please… Please, I need you in me…," I nearly cried out, as he pushed against my bundle of nerves harder.

I need him in me, right now! I screamed in my head.

"Hmm. I wish your leg wasn't broken, so you could be on top of me, riding my cock. But it's alright. I can leave you lying on your back, so I can watch you as I fuck you."

"Edward!" I cried out.

He laughed and moved slowly up my body, settling his hips in between my legs. I could feel his arousal against my thigh, and I reached down and grabbed it, stroking it softly.

"Oh God…," Edward moaned out, causing me to giggle.

"I think it's my turn to tease you," I said seductively.

"Definitely not!" he said, pushing my hand away and swiftly entering me.

We both let out a loud moan. It felt like two halves coming together to be whole again. He was hovering over me, supporting his body weight with his hands while he started moving in and out of me slowly.

"Edward," I whispered. "I do not need you to take things slow… I need you to fuck me."

"Bella, are you sure?" he asked looking into my eyes and making me feel as if he could see my soul.

I nodded and bit my lip. "Please…,"

He began to move in and out of me in faster and harder than I had ever thought possible. He moaned as he fucked me, effectively causing me to tighten and orgasm like I never had before.

"I'm so close…," Edward gasped out as he moved one of his hands down to rub my clit as I came, prolonging the intense experience I was having. I dug my nails in his back, closing my eyes and feeling as if I was about to cum again.

"Keep your eyes open for me. I love watching you," he said as he sucked my earlobe.

I struggled to keep my eyes open as he thrust deeper into me. I arched again as we climaxed together, crying out each other's names. He collapsed on top of me as we rode out the aftershocks together, a shaking pile of tangled limbs.

I could barely see or catch my breath as I felt myself going into overload, realizing what I just had done, scared about the fact that I honestly didn't care, that this was one of the greatest experiences of my life. Tears started escaping my eyes as I shuddered, my body trembling with spasms that ran up and down my entire length. I couldn't find the words in me to speak.

"Bella, are you alright?" Edward asked, rolling over to the side of me, as he began to stroke my hair.

There he goes again with asking me if I'm alright!

Hush, it's a good thing. He's trying to be nice.

All I could manage were gasping sobs. I couldn't even begin to explain how I was feeling.

It's kind of like being ripped apart, and having every piece of me fully exposed. Why can't I just tell him that?

He pulled me into his arms and wrapped the blankets around us, somehow sensing that I needed something to hold me together since I didn't seem capable of doing it myself.

I laid my head against his chest, willing myself to calm down so I could speak again. I felt rather than heard him humming to me softly; I found myself focusing on the vibrations coming from his chest, intent on hearing it with every fiber of my being, until I finally found myself feeling as if I was put back together again.

"Are you better now?" he asked with concern.

"I… I think so." I stammered.

"Good," he pulled me in tightly and just held me, as he caressed me lightly with his fingertips, brushing them along my arms and hips. It was painfully sweet.

"You're so beautiful…," he said softly, tenderly.

"I could say the same about you, but I don't know how you'd react to being called beautiful," I giggled.

"I don't mind being called beautiful as long as it comes from your lips," he said, placing a soft kiss on my forehead. "This was amazing. You don't know how long I've wanted you. I wish we could just stay like this forever."

"Me too… Me too…," Suddenly the weight of the world was on my shoulders once again, and I knew that I had made such a huge mistake, yet I couldn't find it in myself to regret it.

He suddenly laughed.

"What's so funny, Edward?" I asked curiously.

"This whole situation. I've wondered for a long time what it would be like to finally have you… What it would be like to finally give in to how I was feeling. When you were lying in that hospital bed with a concussion and a broken leg, I realized how easily it could've been for me to lose you. This feels good… it feels, right."

I laughed too, and it felt good. I realized that it felt good and right for me too. Right now everything with him was wonderful and comfortable. It felt like the familiarity that grew when two people were relaxed and felt truly at ease with one another. It felt great, but I remembered feeling a little this way before with Jake. I started to wonder how long it would take before everything would all be shot to hell.

I frowned and turned away from Edward, remembering how quickly guys seemed to lose interest in me.

"What's wrong?" Edward asked, with concern in his voice.

"I'm just wondering how long this will last…," I admitted softly.

"How long what will last?"

"This. You and me. How long will you keep me around until you get tired of me and start looking for someone new?"

His silence gave me chills, and I was almost afraid to look at his face. I chanced it. His face seemed to be carved out of stone in that moment.

I quickly backtracked. "I just mean… Well, Jake used me and forgot about me as soon as I stopped talking to him after like a day apparently…," I ran my finger up and down his chest, trying to get him to look at me.

"I could kill him for doing that to you. I want to kill every man that has ever hurt you." He said, his voice having a hard edge of anger to it.

I grabbed his face with my hands and forced him to look at me. "Edward, I don't want you to do that. I just don't want you to regret this… to regret me."

"Is that what you think will happen? That I'll regret this? That I'll regret ever being with you?"

I nodded and closed my eyes, trying to hold back the tears that once again threatened to spill out of my eyes.

"Do you regret this?" He asked, sadly.

"No! I don't regret this; I don't regret you at all!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure! I don't ever want to regret you, Edward." I said, letting the tears spill out so he could see my sincerity.

"I don't want you to think this was a mistake, because it's not…," He whispered, ghosting his lips against mine.

"This isn't a mistake." I agreed and decided to take the honest route and let him know exactly how I felt. I needed to lay my heart on the line and get it over with. "I don't know what's happening to me, but for the first time in my life, I can feel. I can actually feel something and it scares me! For way too long I've been pushing my feelings aside, burying them deep within me. And when I'm with you Edward, I feel alive again. I don't know how I'm ever going to be able to thank you, but if you want to leave, go ahead and leave. I don't want you to wait around and break my heart. I just want you to know that no matter what, this wasn't a mistake…," I made myself stop rambling and soon the silence in the room was very overwhelming.

Oh God. I'm an idiot. I shouldn't have said so much. What's wrong with me?

You told him what's on your mind.

Yeah, but he didn't need to know all that. I hate myself. I hate my word vomit. I hate this…

"Bella… Bella!" Edward said, shaking me out of my internal conversation. "Did you hear what I just said?"

I looked up at him and shook my head no.

"I said that I'm not going anywhere… I won't leave you like everyone else has…,"

I didn't let him finish, because I didn't want to hear anymore. I just wanted him. I attacked him with my lips, kissing him feverishly. "I need you." I said softly, meaning it in more way than one, and he understood because he whispered, "I need you too," back to me.

And in that moment, I felt whole again. I felt like I could take whatever the world threw out me. I felt like me.

Just a quick note before I run and hide... Yes, they finally had sex. Yes, Bella is a huge cryer. She's been holding back emotions for so long that they've finally caught up with her.

So review and let me know if it was worth the wait...