Ch. 14

Spencer

The sun was poking through the curtains, as I watched Ashley sleep. She looked so peaceful. I leaned down kissing her forehead, and smiled when she moved closer to me. I pulled the covers over her, and gently got out of bed. I quickly got dressed, leaving a not for her. I turned to look at her before I left, I Smiled at her sleeping one last time then slipped out.

I didn't want to go straight home, but I didn't know where to go. I kept thinking about what happen with Ashley, and why I let it happen. I didn't want to hurt her, but I wanted her so bad. I was going to go straight home after I dropped her off, but instead I found my self in her bed. I have been with many girls, but she was like something I couldn't get enough. She knew what I liked, and she wasn't afraid to dominate me when she wanted to. Kelly and I did have a sex relationship, but even she couldn't satisfy me fully. If I was a vampire, Kelly would be my animal blood. Ashley would be human, and I wouldn't be able to stop.

I pulled up to the spot, looking over. I hadn't been here in a long time, part of me never wanted to ever come here. I got out of my car, and walked through the rows until I came to the spot I came for. My parents grave. I brushed off some of the leaves that had fallen on the stone, and fix the flowers that someone had laid.

"Hey guys, I miss you. I wish you were here to tell me what to do. Mom I know you are shaking your head at me, I'm sorry. You wouldn't be proud of who I have become, and I'm sorry. I wish that I could be someone you would be proud of, but I can't be that girl. I have been through so much pain, and I can't take anymore of it. I know you told me that I would be marrying Ashley one day dad, but I don't think that day will ever come. I care for her to much to let her be hurt by my life choices. I'm afraid that if I let my self be with her or anyone, I'll hurt them. I can't let my self trust anyone, and no one can have a relationship with out trust. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry. The Spencer you last saw was full of life, and now I don't know. I do know that I miss you both every fucking day, and I wish you were here" I wiped the tears from my eyes, and stood up. I place my hand on there tombstone, then turned back to the car.

1 Week later...

I was putting the delivery away. I closed the bar down for the week, and gave my staff the week off. In the last week I didn't answer anyone calls, and ignored the pounding at my door every day. Glen must of lost his key, because he didn't just walk in like usual. Ashley never text me or even called me, I was surprised by that.

I grabbed my cloth and made my rounds washing all the tables. Tonight I was opening up again for karaoke night. There was over 15 people sign up, and more on a waiting list. I turned up the music as I kept cleaning. Days like this I enjoyed, just cleaning and being alone. I blew out some air as I heard the back door shut, guess I don't get to be alone. I turned around and was faced with the brunette I haven't stopped thinking about. Ashley.

"I see you are opening up again" I nodded, and kept cleaning tables.

"I needed a holiday"

"How was it?" I shrugged.

"Spencer can we talk?" I put down my cloth, and walk over to the bar where she was sitting.

"Whats up?" I handed her a beer, and open one for myself.

"I don't know how to talk about this without you thinking I'm being clingy"

"Just say what you got to say Ashley. I got shit to do"

"Why didn't you talk to me after last weekend. I know you don't do relationships, and I knew what I was getting my self into when we slept together. I just don't know why you disappeared."

"I didn't, I was busy and lost track of the days" She shook her head, and took a sip of her beer.

"Bullshit, but if that's the story your sticking to"

"What do you want Ashley?" She looked up at me, and she was biting her lip. Fuck that killed me.

"I want us to be friends"

"We are"

"Then stop avoiding me, and start being more social" I laughed.

"Yes Ma'am"

"I'm serious Spencer. The other night happen, and it was great. I want to just move past it and be your friend. I enjoyed spending time with you, and I know you need a friend as well"

"I have plenty of friends"

"Have you told them your past?"

"No"

"So you need me, because I know it."

"Fine, we can be friends"

"Great. I'll see you tonight then" I gave her a questioning look.

"What about tonight?"

"I'm singing, check your list" with that said she was gone.

I don't know how this was going to turn out, but I couldn't help the smile that was on my face. Ashley seemed to have a way to make me smile, and I wasn't complaining. I grabbed my cloth, and continued cleaning.

R&R Please