"What has been done?" The flea asked gravely.
"Myouga?" Kagome looked at the small demon. He had suddenly gone pale, worry written all over his features.
"Shippo, would you run along and find Sango and Miroku?" He asked urgently. His voice had a firmness, and authority to it that she hadn't heard before. She was beginning to feel on edge.
"Kagome going to be okay?!" The small fox asked, panic and concern making his voice higher than usual.
"We will discuss everything once the group is together. Now go, quickly."
The fox kit looked at the woman, unsure if she should leave her or stay.
"It's okay Shippo. Im alright." She managed to give him a smile, hoping to send him off. He looked at her for a moment longer, as if trying to assess if she was going to disappear before he returned.
"I'll- Ill be right back Kagome."
She nodded in response, still trying to hold her composure together. Sure, she wasn't feeling well, but that's no reason to give everyone a scare like this.
"Myouga…"
"When was it, exactly, that you and Master Inuyasha mated?" He said sternly.
"Mated?" She echoed, her cheeks coloring by the second. "Well… we-we- for quite some time we have been… intimate…"
"No, you misunderstand Kagome." He shook his head as if he had no time for her ignorance. "You have coupled with Master Inuyasha in the past. What you two have done- or attempted to do- was mate."
"H-how did you know Inuyasha and I were-"
"I may be small, but I am still a demon. Of course I can tell when two people have engaged in-"
"Okay, okay!" Kagome covered her face, flushed with embarrassment. She was not longer sure if she felt faint from her illness or from this conversation.
"But- But what do you mean mated… if not… that?" She bit her lip as she tried to get a grip on the situation. "We didn't do anything… unusal…."
"Kagome, you mean to tell me this was done, and you had no knowledge of it!? I had told Master Inuyasha the dangers associated with mating, and he seemed to have understood! I have to admit when you went your separate ways I was a bit relieved… I always feared that this may become a reality. How is this even possible? When did you-"
"We ran into Inuyasha not long ago." Miroku answered as he joined the conversation, Sango by his side.
"He lost control… and kidnapped Kagome while in full demon form."
"So it was his demon that mated with Kagome?" He rubbed his chin, contemplating the situation.
"Wait, hold on." Sango said, trying to catch up with the rest of the group. "I have studied demons and mating rituals… I would have known if Kagome and Inuyasha had mated. She doesn't even have a mark!"
"A mark?" Kagome furrowed her brow. It was mortifying enough that her friends were openly discussing her sex life, that she had gone to great lengths to keep private, but now they were debating whether or not she and Inuyasha had done something she wasn't even aware of.
"That's right- demons leave behind their claim on each other. We would have definitely noticed that." Miroku nodded in agreement.
The flea sighed. "That is true- if it had been a successful mating."
"Can that happen?" Miroku asked, turning to Sango. Apparently everyone had forgotten Kagomes presence.
"Master Inuysha, while possessing many demon qualities, is in fact only a half demon, thus the chances of a successful bonding during a mating ritual… it is always risky."
"What do you mean risky? What happens-" Kagome bit her bottom lip, trying to make sense of what the flea was saying. Inuyasha and she… were mated? Or at the very least, he had tried to?
But before that…
He had spoken about this with Myouga? He… he had thought that the two of them…
Kagome shook her head, trying to chase away the thought. No, that wasn't right. Perhaps they had only spoken of it as a precaution.
In the end, he was with Kikyo. And she… she was-
"Risky you say?" Miroku repeated, worry laced in his voice.
"Mating is a sacred ritual." Sango supplied. "It is more than just the physical act. It is the joining of two souls. It binds the two together in this life and the next, weaving their fates into one."
"Yes, indeed it is that way. It has such an impact that it is not done easily, nor is it done often. It differs from demon to demon, personality traits also are taken into account, but it is something done when the utmost trust is placed in someone."
"And you're saying that Inuyasha and I… are mates?"
The flea sighed. "No, unfortunately that is not the case. As I said, it is not an easy process to become mates, and because Master Inuyasha is a half demon… The side effects of a full blooded demon taking a human as a mate have proven to have disastrous consequences in the past. Master Inuyashas late father, as dearly as he loved his bride, refused to have the process done, if only to protect her."
"And with Inuyasha being a half demon… Im not sure Ive ever heard of a hanyou mating with a human." Sango said, her voice low. "The outcome… the side effects…"
"And what are those?" Kagome asked. "Is that why I have been so sick?"
Myouga closed his eyes.
"It is not that simple." He took a deep breath, looking at the woman with sympathetic eyes. "You are correct- you are ill because the two of you attempted to mate… There are benefits to mating, beyond what Sango has already said, but there are also negatives. When a partner is in danger, wounded, dying… The other feels it as well. There are even those who have died when their mate has, depending on what type of demon it was."
"Does that mean Inuyasha isn't well!?" Kagome sat up with a start, concern giving her more energy than she had felt all day. "Is he alright?"
"If I were to venture a guess, he is most likely fine." She seemed to relax a little at this, but her body was still tense. "Kagome, there is no easy way to say this… but the reason that you are ill…"
Kagome knew what the flea demon was going to say. She had known it before he had made his appearance, before he had tasted the change in her blood. She looked at the small demon, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"Kagome… you're dying."
~.~
Inuyasha was confused.
Fuck, when wasn't he confused.
But this time it seemed justified. Kikyo was always so adamant that they hunt for the shards, relentlessly track down every lead; but this time, when the news of the wolf demon made its way to them, she had refused to pursue it.
There were rumors in the nearby town that a demon had been by, a fierce one with shards in his legs, angry and looking for a fight.
When the miko caught wind of it she declared it was a waste of time, that they would head in the opposite direction.
It felt familiar, all of it. And it pissed him the fuck off.
And what was worse, he had no freaking idea why.
Shards in his legs. Cheater.
'What the hell have you done to her, you mutt?!' The wolf screamed, his fangs bared and ready to rip him to shreds. 'You know she is MY woman! How dare you touch her!'
He readied his claws. He wouldn't use his sword on this bastard. He wanted to use his hands. He wanted to take him down with his fists. He wanted to show him once and for all that she was HIS. Inuyashas. Not one part of her had ever belonged to the mangy wolf.
She was his. She had given him her body. She had given him her heart. She called out HIS name at night, begged HIM to take her.
And he couldn't wait to fucking tell him.
"Feh, shes never been yours, you fucking bastard. Shes MINE."
"Like Hell." The wolf demon ground out. "Im going to finally give you what you deserve."
"Go ahead." He said, his smirk showing his fangs. "Ive been waiting for this day ever since I laid eyes on you. I should have fucking killed you when you kidnapped her."
He had been about to leap. He had been on the balls of his feet, ready to plunge at him. The sound of her voice, her panting cries made him halt. He squeezed his eyes shut as he ground his teeth together.
"DAMNIT."
"STOP! Please!" She begged. Inuyasha immediately pushed her behind him, throwing her a heated look.
Why? Why couldn't she just let him fucking end him?
Why couldn't he just defy her and do what every demonic instinct in his body told him to?
Because he didn't want to upset her.
Because he didn't want to see the look on her face, the one of disappointment and disgust. He clenched his fists, ignoring the iron smell of his own blood.
"Im going to gut him Kagome! He violated you! He fucking took advantage of you when I wasn't there!"
"Its not like that!" she screamed, twisting away from him. "I-" He could hear her swallow hard. "I love him."
He hadn't heard that before.
"You- You what?!" The wolf gasped in disbelief.
She nodded her head. "I do. I'm in love with him."
She loved him.
She had said it out loud.
She hadn't said it in a way that sounded fake or forced. She had admitted to being in love with a hanyou. A filthy half breed. She admitted to loving someone as fucked up as him.
And she had said it to Koga. That was a thousand times better than tearing those shards out from his legs, a million times better than ripping him limb from limb.
"Kagome, you don't know what you're saying. Hes done something to you. Hes-"
She shook her head. He could see her ink black hair sway with her dismissal. "I have always loved him. I've always valued you as a friend… but that's all. I-Im sorry Koga."
Inuyasha grabbed hold of her, pulling her back towards him.
He could after all. She was his.
She-
It caught him off guard. It always did.
He scrambled to try and remember the crucial parts.
A wolf demon. Angry and ready to kill. Convinced he had… violated her?
The woman.
She loved him. She had said so. In that moment, she had chosen him over the wolf.
And he had called to her…What was her name? K-K-…
FUCK. None of it made sense.
And its not like he could do anything with the information, even if he had somehow managed to hold onto the memory of her name. Its not like he could just walk up to Kikyo and ask about the mystery woman that he clearly had been with.
"Kikyo, I think we should track down that wolf demon." He said, his voice not as firm as he wished it was. In his dreams-memories- whatever the fuck they were- he always sounded so confident. Like he was the one in control; a leader. The one in charge.
With Kikyo, everything sounded like a fucking question. He had no confidence.
"No, we will continue in this direction. At this rate it is simply senseless to turn back."
"But the bastard has two shards!"
"Which makes him all the more dangerous. The rumors say he is enraged."
"I can take that asshole down easily." He dismissed, "I don't even need my-" he stopped, searching for the word.
What didn't he need?
The miko stared at him, as if trying to assess the sudden change.
"I-I just feel like we shouldn't waste anymore time and get the shards if were going to piece back the jewel." He said, his voice lower.
"Inuyasha, you are in no condition to make judgement calls, not when you have not recovered your memories yet. Your thinking may still be impaired."
The hanyou blinked twice, trying to determine if there was a way to not take offense to that statement. He could feel his anger rising. He could feel it boiling to the top.
"Fuck this." He growled, grinding his teeth together.
"E-Excuse me?" Kikyo stumbled on her words, clearly shocked.
"I-I-" Inuyasha took several deep breaths. "Sorry." He ahad trouble meeting her eyes. "I've gotta go clear my head. Ill be back."
~.~
"Dying?" Kagome repeated, her voice slightly louder than a breath. She was unheard, as the group had gone into an uproar.
"That cant be right!" Sango pleaded.
"Don't say that!" Shippo cried, launching himself onto her.
"Myouga, you are certain of this?" Miroku asked.
"I… I don't know." He confessed. "Given the time that has passed between the mating, Kagome should have already passed by now if it was unsuccessful. Yet she is still sick, and her energy fading. The taste of her blood…"
"Perhaps it is Kagomes miko abilities." Miroku spoke up, causing everyone to turn their attention to the monk. "Maybe it is her spiritual powers that are stabilizing her." He turned to the flea. "Is there anything that can be done?"
"You may be right about that." Myouga nodded. "Yes, that certainly makes a degree of sense." He said, trying to connect dots in his head.
"But is there anything we can do?!" Sango asked, repeating Mirokus ignored question.
"This is just a theory…but it could be that Master Inuyashas demonic powers are at war with Kagomes abilities. Her body may be treating it as a virus to be defeated instead of accepted. It may be that because the mating was done unknowingly to Kagome that caused the ritual to fail… But if Master Inuyasha were to do the ritual again, perhaps it would be-"
"No. That cant happen." Kagome finally spoke up.
"Kagome, you have to- it could save your life!" Sango exclaimed.
She shook her head. "Inuyasha is with Kikyo. I cant be his mate."
"But you could die!" Shippos high pitched voice cut through.
"Even though Master Inuyasha is with Kikyo, he certainly would not let you die Kagome." Myouga agreed. "Im sure he would rather-"
"Its not just that." Kagome said. "He- He has no memory of me."
"What?" the voices seemed to say in unison.
"He.. He asked Kikyo to remove me from his memories." She tried to choke back the tears to get the difficult words out. "That time… when he- when he came back… got back to himself… he remembered me and-" Kagome brought her hands to her face, sobbing uncontrollably.
"It was awful. He was in so much pain. Kikyo said she could fix it… but she was unsure if there would be damage. She said that if it were to happen again, she couldn't guarantee that he-"
"Oh Kagome…" Sango sank down to her knees to embrace her friend. "Why didn't Kyo tell us any of this!?" Sango demanded.
"I begged him not to. Don't be angry with him."
"But even still, we should try and find Inuyasha." Sango looked at her pleadingly.
"If he remembers me, he could die. If he remembers me, and is some how fine, he is tethered to me unwillingly, for all of eternity. I cant do that to him." Kagome faintly smiled. "I love him. I wont."
"But you'll die!" Shippo yelled. "Don't you get it Kagome! If Inuyasha doesn't come here, youre going to die!"
"Shippo-"
Kagome couldn't hold her head up much longer. She needed to rest. Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, she readied herself to try and console the kit.
But she was too late.
He was already gone.