Mixed with your perfume

The song from the jukebox went through my head, the romantic feeling it evoked washing over me with the rain. In my mind I brought myself back to the bar, my body pressed against Jun, swaying with hers on the dance floor. I breathed deeply, smelling the jasmine scent of her hair.

I could feel Jun in my arms, sense the blood pounding through my veins… Physically I was walking home in the rain, but in my mind I was at the Snack J, touching Jun's lips with my finger and desperately wanting to kiss her…

What would have happened if I had kissed her? What if Jinpei hadn't interrupted us?

I would have told her how I felt. I had been about to say it. It had been on the tip of my tongue.

All it would have taken was four words…

I love you, Jun…

What would she have said if I had told her that?

I imagined Jun's face, smiling in response, her lips carefully forming her reply…

I love you too, Ken…

Then I would smile, and brush my mouth against hers, kissing her… for real this time, not like at New Year's. I could almost feel her silken skin in my hand as I cupped her cheek, and my body hardened at the thought of her pressing against me, her soft breasts being crushed against my chest…

A cold splash of water over my foot brought me back to reality. I hadn't been watching where I was going, and I had stepped into a puddle. A slimy wetness began dripping down into my shoes… the only part of me that had so far remained dry.

The unpleasant feeling was like a wakeup call. I had been so busy imagining how nice it could be if I admitted my feelings to Jun, that I had forgotten how terrible it could be.

A cold shiver ran down my spine as an image of Berg Katse rose up in my mind.

I had always scoffed at the idea of a nemesis… it seemed like a ploy for cheap novels, or Hollywood movies. But at the same time, if such a thing really were to exist, I supposed that Berg Katse and I fit the bill.

I couldn't count the number of times that we had each thought that we had defeated the other, only to return to our constant stalemate. No matter how many Galactor bases or mecha the Science Ninja Team destroyed, the reality was that the ISO still had no idea where Galactor Headquarters was, or knew much about this mysterious Leader X figure. And somehow, no matter what precautions we took, Berg Katse always managed to slip from my grasp. The mere thought of his Devilstar escape pod was enough to make me want to smash my fist into the wall.

Much as I hated to admit it, Berg Katse and I had a lot in common. We were both leaders, hiding our respective identities from the world, each of us having our own agenda to pursue. But the one defining difference between us was the moral code that governed our actions. Katse, it appeared, didn't have one, while I most definitely did. There were things I knew that I could never do, no matter how angry I was. But Berg Katse had no such compunctions.

If Katse knew that Jun and I… my throat constricted at the thought. There had been times before, when we had been captured. I remembered one occasion when I had been overcome with gas, while attempting to rescue Ryu from an underwater Galactor base. Katse had captured me, and spent hours torturing me for his own amusement. At the time I had wondered why he hadn't just taken off my mask and killed me, but slowly, I had realized that his warped mind didn't work that way. He had been so convinced of his victory over me that he hadn't conceived that I could escape. And at the time, he was right: I was his prisoner for two days, and might have been for longer had Ryu not been able to break out of his cell and help me destroy the base.

Katse had wanted to enjoy himself… lording it over me, threatening to reveal my identity, saving the pleasure of killing me until the end… he had only intended to kill me after he had broken me. He told his soldiers that I would never reveal any information, and should just be executed, but it had never been his intention to get me to reveal anything.

He had only wanted to break me.

In a way, it was a good thing that I had gone through those terrible days, because they had given me an insight into the Galactor Leader's level of insanity that I might not otherwise have had. Physical torture was only the beginning for Katse. He had whispered in my ear of what he really wanted to do with me, once he had stripped me of my uniform and revealed my identity.

The mere thought of what he suggested had had my mind screaming in terror, and yet I had known that Katse wouldn't hesitate to treat me in that fashion, to degrade and abuse me, showing his power over me to his men, and to the world.

If he ever captured the Swan…

If he knew what she truly meant to me…

My mind reeled, and I felt nauseous at the thought of Berg Katse doing to Jun what he had promised to do to me. She could deal with the physical torture, she was ready to give her life in the fight against Galactor, but was she truly ready to sacrifice her innocence, her peace of mind, her dignity…?

Even more, was I ready to live with the knowledge that I had been the cause of such torment?

It suddenly occurred to me that I didn't even know whether or not Jun was a virgin. She had had a relationship with Koji, but that had been so long ago, and so brief… She could be completely unprepared for the horrors that Berg Katse could unleash upon her.

I couldn't be the cause of that. I would never be able to live with myself.