"The Few Remaining Strands"
13. The Mother's Sin
1
Edea was glad that her husband had many distinct qualities, but no quality other than his simple way of not interfering stood out as much. Cid had, as he often did, asked her if he was needed, if there was anything he could do. Upon hearing that her answer was no, he simply bid them both good night and went back to sleep, leaving her to do what she needed to, what she didn't want to.
Squall looked like hell. There were dark circles under his eyes, a stubble on his cheeks. The way he was sitting there, softly breathing, just gave her the impression of a man on the verge of falling.
"You look tired."
"I am. But I have to know. I need to know."
"About Daniel?"
"Why don't the others remember, Matron? Why am I the only one?"
Edea hesitated. Once she answered, she knew, there would be no turning back. Oh Great Hyne, help me.
"We decided that plucking Daniel out from their memories completely was the best way."
"We?"
"Me and Ultimecia."
2
"...what?"
"After I took her powers, she remained present in my mind, channeled herself into my thoughts. She taught me many things. Witch-craft. She taught me how to use my power, how to manipulate energies beyond what para-magic could allow."
Edea half-smiled.
"She was a teacher, Squall. You must understand that if I had any idea what all her lessons would lead up to..."
"What does that have to do with-"
"Because it will make telling what I have to tell you easier. You can give me that much, can't you?"
Squall didn't say anything.
3
"Every night, after you had gone to bed, I would begin by casting LVL4 Sleep on all of you. Nothing short of a Dispel would wake you up. I didn't want any of you to wake up to the noise. Then, I would fix the various symbols Ultimecia had had me set up in my room. Arcane runes, belonging to the time, she thought, of Vascaroon."
"What were they for?"
"To hold the magical energy in the room. To not let anything escape."
"Go on."
"Ultimecia wasn't satisfied with my cautious behavior. I wouldn't let her talk me into conjuring anything bad or dangerous. But she wanted me to experience the highs of pure magic, the euphoric sensations of creating something, of feeling like Hyne. Sometimes she made me conjure up these... dark things. Pure-magic creatures, too pure to exist by themselves. I would be their host, let them experience our reality for a short amount of time. Ultimecia kept these beings on a short leash, so as not to harm me. The runes kept the creature from you, and Ultimecia kept it from me."
Squall swallowed hard. He knew where this was headed.
"And one night, she had me summon this... mass... to this day, I don't even know what it is. I don't even know if it is something, or just some abomination made manifest by me. It didn't find me compatible as a host, it was looking for someone else."
"Daniel."
"I didn't notice until it was too late... I had made a mistake, or Ultimecia had made me, I still don't know... one of the runes was incomplete. Not enough for the creature to run loose, but enough to dispel, for instance, a Sleep spell..."
"But why Daniel? And how did I-"
"Ultimecia later said, if it had woken Daniel up, it would also wake up somebody close to Daniel, so as to have an alternative when the first body burns up... Even if so, I don't know what possessed Daniel to open the door..."
"He was curious. He was naturally curious." Squall said, "One of the few things about him that I do remember."
Edea lifted a hand.
"Please... don't interrupt. It's hard enough. Please."
"I won't." Squall said.
4
"Daniel opened the door. I locked it, I know I did, and I don't know how he opened the door, but he did. The thing just leapt into him. I screamed at Ultimecia, threatened her with killing myself to save him. Killing myself and ending her influence, right then and there... looking back, maybe I should have. Ultimecia told me that there wasn't a way to get the abomination out – that it would..." she choked, "...hollow him out and move to the next host. Not unless it perished in its current host... and that's when I saw you standing there, I panicked."
Edea sobbed. Squall could see tears trickling down her cheeks.
"I couldn't let it jump to you and devour you too, and I could see that it was reaching for you. You just passed out at the mere sight of it, and I completed the circle by shutting the door. It retreated... back into Daniel. I attempted to strike a bargain with it. I'd do whatever it wanted me to do, I'd owe it a boon. It refused. Said it could make him a sorcerer."
Squall raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything.
"But there are no sorcerers, the male body is unsuited for pure magics... it would..."
Edea took a moment. She wiped her tears but couldn't stop herself from crying.
"It was tearing him apart..." Edea said, now crying freely, "If it just left him, it'd come to me, but it wasn't leaving, it was trying to make room for itself, it was destroying Daniel from within... Great Hyne in Heaven..." Edea sobbed, "I... reached out and I... grabbed him... by the throat. And I s... I s-strangled him."
5
Edea cried. Squall didn't know whether to comfort her, or to beat her within an inch of her life.
6
The tea at the bottom of his mug was cold, but Squall relished a chance to do something else with his mouth besides curse and shout. Hyne, he was tired. Too tired to even dwell, but his question was unanswered.
"But even so, why did I forget, or, why did I remember after all this time?"
"Your own GF took the memory."
"My G... wait... you mean Griever!?"
Edea nodded.
"You always talked about Griever, the strongest GF of them all. Lion-born, the noble Knight's GF. I needed something to suppress the memory – I couldn't let you endure the trauma of having seen pure black magic, much less your best friend... dead by my hand."
"So you-"
"I... or rather, Ultimecia and I, we... created Griever and I implanted it into your mind. Junctioned him to you. I gave it the memory of Daniel. Griever is yours, Squall. Ultimecia gave it to you, and Ultimecia took it from you."
"So why do I remember?"
"Griever was supposed to protect you. But then, the Second War happened and Griever was destroyed. The memories it was meant to protect you from..."
Squall remembered Diablos saying, no memory inhabited by junctioning a Guardian Force returns undamaged.
"And that's it." Edea said, with a heavy sigh, "That's who Daniel is. He is my sin."
Squall felt tired...