The Talk

MADDIE: AGE 9

After looking through the window to make sure that Ash and Noah had indeed left, I rushed upstairs to where my daughter Maddie was finishing up her packing for her upcoming departure.

"Hey sweetie," I greeted her, walking through her door and sitting on her bed while she walked around the room grabbing a few things.

"Hey, Mom. Can I help you with something?" she asked, eyeing me suspiciously.

"Why yes," I answered. "We...uh...we need to talk about a few things?" I can't believe this day had come when I had to talk to my daughter about that fact that she was growing up.

"About what?" she asked, shoving a few shirts into her bag.

"Stuff. Just sit down," I instructed her, pointing to the chair in front of her desk.

"Oookay," she said as she hesitantly sat down. "What's up?"

Placing my hands in my lap, I stared down at them unsure of how to start this conversation I had been dreading. It needed to be discussed, but I really hated having to crush her childhood innocence. "Well, in a few years, you're going to be going through some changes," I explained.

"Changes?"

"Yes. Changes in your body. You'll uh start to notice them and you'll need some stuff for them eventually."

"Can't I just use an ever stone? You know? To stop the changes until I'm ready?" I started at her, unsure of how to respond to that. Did she really just ask that? Clearly I had not educated her well.

"No Maddie. You're not a Pokemon," I sighed. "Oh forget it. Look Maddie. The truth is you don't make a wish to get a baby. And in a few years your body will start changing to accommodate."

"Then how do you get a baby?" she asked. Now I was stuck. I had to tell her the truth.

"Well..in a few years you'll start to experience this thing called puberty..." I started to explain, going through the difference between males and females and how her body would change and what to do when that happened. At first she seemed to be doing okay with what I was telling her, that is until I started talking about what would happen to her each month. At this point I watched as her face twisted into a look at horror as it slowly dawned on her. I would have stopped, but I needed to explain everything so she would be educated properly. I think my face turned at least 10 shades of red when I had to explain to her where exactly babies come from.

"You and Dad did what? That's just...just.. EW. Gross." She had a look of disgust on her face, probably trying to block the mental images she was seeing. Then suddenly her face turned into one of shock. "OH MY GOD! That's what you were doing when you locked me out of your room when I was a kid?"

"Uh yeah," I replied scratching the back of my head. I couldn't say no could I? "But you won't have to worry about that until you're much older, RIGHT?" I asked her.

"Uh. Duh, mom. That's just gross." Thank god her hormones hadn't arrived.

"I say that because when you get older Maddie you will start to notice boys in a different way. You'll think they are cute and these things called hormones will take over at times and make you act and think funny. Boys get them too and there's can be a lot more controlling, so just please be careful."

"Anything else?" she said, annoyance in her voice. I could tell that I probably needed to wrap up this conversation before she started to ignore me.

"Not now. We'll talk more when you get older and you are actually into boys. Then you'll have a whole new obstacle you'll have to face."

"And that is?"

"Your dad."

She tilted her head in confusion, but I would wait until she had a boyfriend and introduced us to him for that one. That would be a huge test of Ash and Maddie's relationship.

Later that evening after dinner, I was cleaning up the dishes when I felt somebody wrap their arms around my waist before he said, "I heard there's supposed to be a shooting star tonight. I heard that when you see them you're supposed to make a wish."

Before I could respond, I heard a loud crash as a plate was dropped, shattering on the floor. Whipping around, Ash and I saw Maddie standing in the doorway a look somewhere between horror and disgust on her face.

"GOD!" she shouted. "How can you two even think about THAT after we just ate? You're disgusting Dad. Thanks a lot, I'm now scared for life." And with that, she turned on her heel and walked out the door, shouting some more about her parents lack of consideration as she walked back upstairs.

"What was that all about?" Ash asked

"I might have told her the truth," I said sheepishly.

"The truth about what?" I guess I wasn't very clear.

"Where babies come from."

"Oh," he replied, his mouth forming an o-shape. Then I think it hit him because I saw his face pale. "OH MY DID YOU DO TO MY LITTLE GIRL, MISTY? Now she's going to like boys. There's going to be boys after my daughter! Boys like Brock are going to be after her!" he started freaking out, pacing back in forth. He might have been getting a little ahead of himself.

"Don't worry, Ash. You've got at least three years."

"Three years?" he asked, briefly glancing at me. "I better start preparing." He walked out of the kitchen, unanswered questions in the air. What exactly was he doing to prepare?