Chapter Fourteen

"He's lying!"

"Maybe I should just leave him alone..."

"But he obviously cares about you!"

"…after all, I had my chance and I ruined it."

"Don't give up yet, honey. We'll think of something."

"But Mimi, what am I supposed to do?"

Mimi sighed as she gently stroked Maureen's curly locks. This was completely unexpected. How could Mark tell Maureen he didn't love her? Everyone who knew Mark could see how smitten he was whenever Maureen walked into the room. Why wouldn't he just admit he still cared for her?

"Don't stress about it anymore today. I'll come up with something." Mimi was determined to see Mark and Maureen together. They both deserve to be happy, she reasoned silently. God knows we've been through enough misery already. Someone around here deserves to be happy.

"I've got to pick up my stuff at Joanne's," Maureen frowned as she rose from her place on the sofa. "I'm not about to ask Mark again. Think Roger would mind helping me move a couple boxes?"

"He'd probably be happy to," Mimi assured her. "I'll ask him."

Mimi crossed the loft and tapped on the bathroom door. She entered before Roger could invite her in. Mimi smiled when she found Roger, wearing only a towel around his waist, shaving before the cracked, fogged bathroom mirror. "Hey," she said as she closed the bathroom door behind her.

"Hi," Roger replied, returning her grin heartily. "Can I help you?"

"Yeah. You can lose the towel," Mimi joked. She stood behind him silently for a moment, rubbing his damp shoulders gently. Roger used a thin, stained hand towel to wipe the excess shaving cream off his face, and then turned to face her.

"Did anyone ever tell you how incredibly beautiful you are?" Roger took her thin face in both his hands and kissed her sweetly.

Mimi returned the kiss readily before stating her business. "Actually I do have a favor to ask you."

"Anything for you, my love," Roger promised as he leaned down to place small kisses up and down Mimi's café-colored neck.

The beauty put her request on hold long enough to savor the feeling of each warm peck on her skin. His hot breath caused chills to overtake her entire body. Mimi breathed in deeply, smelling his clean skin and hair. A soft giggle escaped her before Roger's lips reconnected with hers.

He's incredible. He knows exactly how to touch me. It drives me wild, she thought. Mimi felt totally entranced as Roger kissed her passionately; his large, rough hands cradling her jaw line on both sides. She reached both arms around his neck and stroked his damp hair, which only intensified the passion with which he kissed her. Roger pulled away only long enough to suggest that they move to his bedroom. Mimi nodded in agreement, took his hand, and followed him submissively. Though they passed through the common room quickly, she caught a brief glimpse of Maureen; still pouting on the sofa.

"Shit," she hissed under her breath. She had forgotten all about Maureen.

"What?" Roger asked as he closed the bedroom door behind them.

"My favor," Mimi sighed.

"I'm gonna lose the towel. Don't worry," Roger grinned as he embraced her again.

"No," Mimi pulled away in order to avoid giving in to his kisses again. "I told Maureen you'd help her."

"Help her do what?" Roger questioned, acting a bit disappointed.

"She's going to get all her stuff back from Joanne's apartment. She needs you to help her move some boxes."

"Why me? Why doesn't she ask Collins or Mark?" He released his grasp on her, dropping his arms to his sides.

"Collins is out. And she doesn't want Mark to go." Mimi sat at the foot of Roger's bed.

"Why doesn't she want Mark to help her? I thought she had the hots for him again."

"Well, she does…" Mimi didn't really want to broach the subject with him.

"Then why wouldn't she ask him?" Roger opened his closet door and retrieved a wrinkled pair of boxers, faded denim jeans and a black t-shirt with cut-off sleeves.

"Well I don't know all the details," Mimi admitted, "but apparently Maureen made a pass at him and Mark shut her down."

Roger smirked as he dressed. "Well good for Mark. Maybe he's finally come to his senses."

"But he hasn't. I mean, we all know how he feels about her."

"He's realized that Maureen is not what he needs. He cares about her but knows it would be a mistake to get involved with her again. I think that's pretty wise."

"You talk as if you hate Maureen. She's one of our closest friends!" Mimi stood and crossed to Roger, unwilling to back down in her defense of their dramatic friend.

"She is my friend. But baby, even you have to admit Maureen's a little over the top sometimes."

"So what? Is that any reason for Mark to shut her down like that?"

"Mimi, you didn't see him…"

"Who?"

"Mark. You didn't see what he went through when Maureen dumped him."

"So enlighten me," Mimi tried to snuggle up to Roger's chest, but he turned away. He fumbled with some loose change and guitar picks on his nightstand before speaking again.

"He was a wreck. He didn't eat, didn't sleep. He stayed up 'til all hours watching movies he'd made of her…of them together. He critiqued every aspect of their relationship trying to pinpoint what made her leave. He truly believed he'd done something wrong…something to hurt her. While I went through heroin withdrawals, Mark went through Maureen withdrawals. He didn't understand that for Maureen, he was just a phase…just someone to fuck until she met somebody she liked better. Maureen is all about Maureen. She cares about pleasing herself, and it doesn't matter who gets hurt as long as Maureen is happy."

Mimi squeezed her way between Roger and the nightstand. She stared into his eyes for a moment and realized how strongly he really felt about the whole matter. "You're right. I didn't know Mark or Maureen then. I didn't see what Mark went through. But Roger, Mark and Maureen are my friends now, too. I would never encourage them to be together if I didn't believe they were right for each other…" Roger stared blankly at the floor. Mimi commanded his attention: "Look at me. Life is so short, Roger. We aren't promised tomorrow. We can't spend our lives dwelling on the past. Mark and Maureen split up over a year and a half ago. Now he has the chance to win her back; to be happy…"

"But what if she dumps him again?"

"What if she doesn't? Maureen's changed, Roger. Angel changed her, just like Angel changed everyone else. Watching a friend die alters you. None of us will ever be the same. Give her a chance to show you who she is now. She cares about Mark, Roger. She regrets hurting him before and she wants another chance…"

"No! She's had her chance." His voice elevated and got louder.

"Roger!"

"Mark's my best friend, Mimi. For a long time, he was my only friend. Mark stood by me…"

"I understand that…"

"You don't! Mark saved my life long before you did!"

Taken aback by his words, Mimi stood motionless for a moment. She gazed silently at Roger, whose eyes were suddenly sad. She didn't understand what he meant. He'd never shared much about his past with her – never told her what his life had been like before she'd entered it. Mimi had felt the past was irrelevant; she hadn't shared much of her past with Roger, either. She reached out to touch him, but pulled away when Roger began to speak again.

"When I found out I was sick…after April died, I was angry. I was angry that April had escaped HIV, and I was stuck here to suffer. I decided that I would escape, too. But I wasn't going to leave some stupid note to tell people why I killed myself. I was going to explain my reasons myself. I figured that after all of my friends and family found out I had AIDS they would disown me, and that would help me to feel less guilty about what I was going to do. So I told my friends from the band first. They treated me like someone with the plague; abandoned me completely. My parents were pissed. They claimed they still loved me, but they didn't ask me to go back home…they didn't want to watch me die…"

That explains a lot, Mimi thought silently. Roger tried to escape to Santa Fe so he wouldn't have to watch me die. I guess he comes by his escapist tendencies honestly.

"…Mark was the last person I chose to tell. I was convinced he'd leave me, too. I mean, he was a naïve, sheltered Jewish boy from Scarsdale. I didn't expect him to hang around. I planned to scare him off immediately. Then I could end my life with no guilt…But instead of running, he - - he hugged me…" Roger's eyes welled with tears. His gaze returned to Mimi whose face was already streaked with salty tears. "He didn't leave, he wasn't mad. He had seen April's note, so he already knew. He was already prepared. He said, 'I'm here. Whatever you need, I'm here…' He promised to stand by me, and he did. Through all my anger and fear and guilt, he was there. Just knowing he supported me changed my mind about ending my life. As long as he was willing to stand by me, I was willing to hang around."

Roger sat down on his bed slowly. Mimi rushed to him, still reeling from his confession. She draped a slender arm over his shoulder. Roger stared into his lap and sniffled loudly.

"I've never told anyone about that before; not even Mark," he confessed.

"Well I'm glad you trust me enough to tell me," Mimi replied quietly. "Remind me to thank Mark someday."

Roger smiled softly. "I guess I just feel like I owe him, Mimi. If I talked him into something that got him hurt again, I would regret it. I guess I feel the need to protect the people I love."

Mimi nodded. His desire to protect others was something that endeared him to her.

"So until Maureen can prove that she won't cheat on him; won't leave him again, I can't give my blessing. She's going to have to prove herself to me."

"Just talk to her, Roger, okay? You'll see she isn't the Maureen we used to know."

Roger smirked as he stood up and walked toward the door. Mimi followed him and kissed him deeply before he walked out to meet Maureen in the common room.

"I'll talk to her, baby, okay?"

"Okay. Hurry back," Mimi instructed, smiling mischievously at him. "Maybe when you get back, I'll be wearing the towel!"

Roger groaned longingly and closed the door behind him.