Self - recrimination bubble bath
Jushiro lay back on the warm sudsy water, letting the heat of the bath do its work, relaxing his sore muscles. His body was sated, bordering on exhausted in fact, after spending so many hours making love to Ryo. And had they gone at it, he thought with a small smile. They had loved each other in so many ways, from tender and slow, to playful, and even savagely at times, knowing their time together was so short, needing to push each other to extremes in an effort to keep their spiraling, confusing emotions in place. Those contrasting emotions were always on the verge of taking over, sorrow being kept at bay, a sadness that threatened to ruin their short, stolen happy moments together, knowing that the eminent time would eventually come when they must say goodbye to one another. They hadn't talked about it, both subconsciously knowing that bringing about the subject, or even letting it come up to the surface of their awareness would surely bring an end to the happiness they had so briefly found in each other's arms. However, the thoughts that had been pushed back forcibly until then , now threatened to destroy his peaceful mood, seeping into his conscious mind, poisoning his disposition, bringing a frown to his continuance.
He had always been an honourable man, he reflected, a true gentleman towards all the women he had involved himself with over his long existence. He had never taken advantage of women he knew were in danger of falling in love with him, or expecting more than casual encounters, mindful of their feelings, not wanting to destroy their friendship, or bring harm to them in anyway, knowing his duties as captain, as well as his sometimes fragile constitution did not make him ideal partner material. He had kept all his previous relationships brief and light, and the women who had been with him knew this before getting involved, fully aware he couldn't, and wouldn't commit to them. There had been times he had ended a relationship, although sincerely liking the woman in question, because he knew she was growing to care, and expect more than the physical pleasure which he offered, as well as the friendship he extended to any woman of his acquaintance.
It was his code of honour, his instinctive need to protect those he cared about that kept him from deepening the relationship further, fully aware that if he chose to further their bond, his sense of honour would demand he settle down and marry, putting the woman in an unfortunate position, that of being the wife, and sometimes unwilling nurse to a busy captain, who was without doubt already married to his vocation, taking his duties as a leader of the Gotei 13 very seriously.
This had not stopped him, however, from taking advantage and seducing a very confused, emotionally unstable girl who was in his care, he thought darkly. Ryo's life had been thrown into chaos already because of him, and his massive error while in the battlefield. Because of him, her life in the world of the living had been cut short, and she had been faced with swiftly coming to terms with all the changes that been brought about her life in such drastic circumstances, quickly accepting them with a dignity and strength of character he deeply admired. It did not mean however, that her emotions were not in turmoil, having to come to terms with so much, in so little time. He felt like a total fiend, the worst type of man for allowing his most basic instincts to take over, and act for him.
He contemplated all kinds of torture he deserved for letting himself weaken, for allowing the strange, unsettling emotions he felt for her grip his body and mind, bringing about a situation that now threatened to destroy not only his future, but the very set of beliefs that he had held about himself for centuries, thinking he'd always been one the good guys, proud of his own moral compass, and the decisions he had made up until this moment in his existence. But it felt so right, a part of him argued, the same traitorous part of him that had pushed him into her arms. Resting his head against the marble corner of the bath, he sighed in defeat, and shame, brows furrowing in a frown to express his current disgust at himself.
Contemplating the upcoming future ,he admitted to himself he was in big trouble, not only in the sense of having to face the consequences of his actions in front of his commander, and eventually Central 46, but also in the sense that something had changed in him, that a new, powerful emotion had taken hold of his heart, a tender, yet possessive feeling for the girl who now lay in his bed, dozing contently after so many hours of being made love to. And he acknowledged then, deep within his heart and soul, that he would never be able to let go of that feeling, no matter how hard he tried, knowing she had in such a short time, inexplicably but undoubtedly taken hold of his heart, lodging herself in there surely and permanently, to forever haunt his mind and soul, and forever taunt him with the knowledge, and enormity of his mistake in letting himself fall in love with her.
Deep in thought, he didn't sense her presence until she had already opened the door, standing in front of him clad only in his kimono, which had been left open to tease him with the partial sight of her small, pert breasts, tight belly, her womanly folds, and the long, slim legs he absolutely cherished. Hair loose around her shoulders, skin glowing, she walked slowly towards the bath, where he sat frozen, taking hold of the sight before him, Ryo let the kimono open further, falling slowly from her arms, caressing her body on the way to the floor, letting it finally rest in a crumpled heap by her bare feet. Mouth watering at the sight of her, his member hardening in mere seconds, he sat there quietly, letting her approach him. She cast her eyes downwards, a small grin appearing on her face, a mixture of shy and sensual that drove him to madness, pushing all the blood in his head towards the lower part of his body, his member throbbing at the sight she presented.
" Is there room for another one?" she said shyly, while licking her lips nervously.
Almost unconsciously, he brought his arms up towards her, in a silent gesture of compliance, motioning with his hands that she come closer.
She stepped into the massive, steaming bath, slowly and seductively, and came into his arms, taking his lips in a slow, tender kiss, while letting her hands move down his ripped chest and belly, taking a moment to caress his aching nipples before moving downwards to grip his impressive erection, stroking him sensually. Self-recriminating thoughts of the future pushed back again, Jushiro concentrated on the woman who offered herself in front of him, letting his body respond to her, telling her with his hands and mouth just how important she had become to him.