Chapter 14

Paul sat up in bed, his heart racing. Weeks had gone by, and though things had never been better between him and Jacob, heavy, painful guilt still weighed on his mind. On nights like this one when his mate was patrolling and not there to fuck him senseless, into a deep and peaceful sleep, he was haunted by Owen's face.

He shook his head, trying to push the disturbing image from his mind, the one that always woke him. As hard as he tried he couldn't forget being forced to take other alpha's sex into his mouth, being so humiliated, being so dominated. And not in the good way like with Jake. After getting his mating mark Paul found that when Jacob took control of his body it was comforting, it made him feel loved and safe. He learned that apparently, it also made him physically ill to be intimately touched by someone else. Though it happened weeks ago, the betrayal that took place in Forks, consenting or not, was obviously still taking its toll on him. He was being punished by some unknown force for what happened with the ancient wolf, forced to relive it in his sleep.

Eventually he got out of bed. It was early, the sun had yet to rise but his body had grown used to getting up this way. He landed the lifeguard job, and even though there was hardly a crowd to guard around his tower, his boss had a no exceptions policy when it came to being late. Taking a brief shower Paul dressed in his red board shorts and a simple white shirt, leaving the house with no breakfast. It wasn't unusual for him to lose his appetite after thinking about Owen.

He took his bike, staring fondly when he peddled past the small house he once called home, knowing Sam and Emily were inside. His brother had yet to speak to him, didn't even look at him when he moved the rest of his things out, and Paul was at his wits end. He would see him today, he decided. After work.

Not a soul was around and he was finding it hard not to drift off at his post, the steady rhythm of the waves lulling him, tempting him to sleep. Yawning he blinked a few times, thinking he was imagining it as familiar figure made its way through the sand toward his tower. His smile was small and pleased as Jacob walked up the wooden ramp.

"You're not permitted to be up here, Sir. I have to ask you to leave."

"And what if I don't?" Jacob was smirking at him, continuing the game by pulling his head back when Paul stood and bent forward to kiss him. The smaller wolf huffed in annoyance at being denied his mates lips and fixed a glare his way.

"If you refuse it's an issue you'll have to take up with the police." Jacob chuckled softly at that, taking the last step to be on Paul's level. He pressed against him, catching the back of his head when Paul tried denying his kiss in turn.

"I don't want any trouble with the law. . I guess you can kiss me if it means I get to stay." Paul's glare faltered, the smile creeping back on his face when Jake pecked the corner of his mouth sweetly. His hands went around the alpha's body, resting on the small of his back, keeping him pressed close.

"Seriously though, you're not supposed to be up here, if my boss sees he'll write me up."

"I think he might make an exception just this once."

"Oh? Why's that?" Paul was smiling until Jacob pulled out of his hold. Then the world around him disappeared, his mind blank as he watched the other wolf kneel down before him, one knee propped up.

"I love you Paul," Jake paused, taking in a nervous breath and Paul's mouth went dry. His heart started to beat erratically as the boy reached into his pocket, pulling out a small velvet box. "more than anything in this world. I can't imagine life without you, there is no life without you-"

"Jacob wait-"

"I want you to be mine in every way possible-"

"Jake-"

"I want to spend every minute with you. I want to start building our life-"

"Please-" The alpha pursed his lips and tilted his head with an unreadable expression, then finally stood back up, a frown marring his face. Paul wanted to smooth away the wrinkle that formed between his brows, hating to see Jacob look so upset. He looked down at the box then back up at his mate, his chest clenching. "I love you. You know I love you. ."

"But?"

"We. . I. . it isn't even legal here. Is this what you really want? A ridiculously overpriced party to show everyone we belong to each other? Flowers? Unneeded gifts? I'm not a girl Jacob, you don't have to do this." He bit his lip, watching the larger wolf process what he said, taking in his refusal. He reached out, cupping his face, his voice coming out rushed, quiet, panicky even to his own ears. "How much did you spend on that ring? I'm yours without all that ingrained pressure society puts on us, saying how we have to live our lives. I don't need this-"

"Maybe I do."

Paul's mouth snapped shut. Jacob was pulling away from his touch, turning, shoulders slumped, walking back down the tower.

"Babe, wait!"

"I'll see you at home."

He never heard the alpha's voice sound so thick, so small. Paul sank down with a heavy sigh, putting his face in his palms. What did Jacob expect from him? Tears of joy? For him to squeal and jump into his arms? A sinking feeling filled him. That's probably exactly what he was expecting, and instead he crushed him. Biting his bottom lip Paul looked out on the ocean. He was just taken off guard! Jake should have talked to him about this sort of thing first instead of just dropping the bomb. Maybe he would have considered it if they discussed the pros and cons, they - they were still so young! No, that meant nothing. . why was he kidding himself? He knew they were bound for life, age was no issue. But still, he was desperately trying to come up with something, anything to defend his reaction, to ease his guilt.

Paul sat for a few more minutes before glancing up and down the coast. Not a soul in either direction. Fuck it, he'd find a new job if he got fired. He needed to talk this out with Jacob.

He peddled as fast as he could, panting as he finally reached the house. Jake wasn't at there and he began to worry more, anxiety taking over. They needed to talk, he needed to hold his mate, to reassure him. Even apart, he could feel Jacob's sorrow.

Jacob walked into Sam's home without knocking. He was more than upset, irrationally angry with his beta. He couldn't wait anymore, falling asleep next to Paul almost every night, knowing the ring was only feet away. Why hadn't he told him? Sam was not only his brother, but Paul's closest friend, surely he knew the boy's view on marriage. Why would he even entertain the idea when they debated it weeks past? Why didn't he tell him then that asking would amount to nothing?

He was shaking, on the verge of phasing when he heard the Emily's frantic voice from the kitchen.

"Sam please calm down."

"No! I want this bitch out of me home now!"

His emotions were pushed aside for the moment, curiosity and the instinct to defend his pack mate taking over. The scent in the home was familiar. Bella.

"He's my best friend and won't even answer my calls because of you! I'm not going until I see him."

He could hear the hysteria in the Bella's voice, brave but mostly stupid for squaring off with Sam.

"Leave my brother alone, I won't say it again. Hes been through enough with the scum that lives in Forks!"

"You've always hated me! You're jealous of our friendship! His life doesn't revolve around your decisions Sam, I'm tired of you always bad mouthing me to him!"

Jake could practically hear Sam's jaw clench, feeling all the emotions roll out of the kitchen, anger from Sam, defiance from Bella, Emily's fear.

"You're right. I've always hated you because I saw you for what you really are, just a selfish fucking bitch. But I'm not keeping him from talking to you. . He was fucking molested Bella! The last thing he needs is anymore negativity in his life so it's small blessing that he finally dropped you! My brother has been through enough. Do not come here again."

Paul startled when he heard the howl. It was feral, so enraged it sent a chill down his spine and instantly he knew it was Jacob. He phased without thinking, his mind instantly touched by his entire pack, following the instinct. Through all the confusion, all the voices, all the thoughts, one was clear, that of his older brother, calling to him desperately, showing his chase after their alpha, flying in between trees toward the town of Forks.

"He knows Paul - I'm sorry - he knows!"

A/N: Its been forever and a day, I know, apologies guys. I kept my promise and will continue to do so though, this story WILL be finished. And hopefully sooner rather than later, I'll try my best. Reviews always do help the process along ;). Also, I got a lot of new story alert peeps during the past months, what's up guys? Thanks for reading!

As always, I must give SUPER thanks to all of my lovelies who take the time to share their thoughts with me: ChelseeaMaayx, iJeedai, Demon2Angel, lollypopgirl222, Adam-1D, Your Angel Matt, lacrymosa-91, TurnItUp03, sappire495, Ms-Write-It, Anonymous, Adicctedtowerewolves, Amy Suzi G, and YouFoundMeAgainXx. I love you all. Soooo much. Seriously.

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