Chapter 14 – Conflicted Feelings and Getting Lost in What It Brings
(Author's Note – Grimmjow loves Shiro. But, Shiro loves Grimmjow. So, this is where the conflicted feelings begin and Shiro, tries to figure what to do with them)
"Again. Use not your anger to attack me. Control it." I said, holding the kendo sword out to Grimmjow, who gives a slight huff as he blows a piece of blue fringe out of his eyes.
The amount of training, I been doing with him had resulted in me and him, spending most of our time in the training area in Urahara-san's cellar then he takes it off me.
"Alright. Sorry, it's just I'm used to fighting my own way." He says, slamming down with kendo sword as I stand there with one behind my back, blocking it immediately then twirling it, hit him hard in the face or don't because he soon blocks it.
I flash-step behind him, bringing it down and he whirls around, hitting hard managing to send me flying backwards into the air with harsh kick in the stomach. This also breaks the wooden kendo sword, making it splinter into tiny fragments, which go flying in all directions.
I hit one of stone structures that is shaped like termite mound, while creating a shape in it of myself and look straight at Grimmjow, seeing that his eyes are glowing with energy then bringing my hand up to my face, look at him.
"Bring your powers out. Your next level of training is now beginning. So, prepare yourself." I said, calling the mask forth to me and soon feel the whiteness of it, go over my face then lift my head, flash-stepping out the crater as it makes a sonic boom noise in the training area in the cellar.
Out the eye-slits of it, I watch as he brings his sword out and places his hand on it, like he was scarring down it then a burst of pure energy surges from him. It swirls around him and forms a storm around him then dissipates as he grins – a opened mouth grin – it reveals him in his true form.
The silent, but deadly Panther and he flash-steps up to, appearing in front of me as he twists in mid-air aiming for my head, while I grab hold of his ankle. I feel the wind from the move shift my head to one side, ruffling the collar on my neck then let go of it.
He steps back from me and I bring a hand up, indicating to him to come at me with all he has then he lunges at me, forming a fist which makes the air ripple around it.
His own power was that great and allow him to punch me in the face – because I was testing to see how strong was he – feeling it snap my head backwards, but not breaking it. Meaning he was holding back and for good reason, only enemies deserved to have their necks snapped.
It becomes like a deadly dance between us, energy sparking all around us in the air and I go to block a kick, but he brings his hand up, forming a ball of blue energy that flings at me as he flash-steps away from me.
It sends my hurtling towards the ground, where landing I bring my hand up, pinching together two fingers to form a ball of crimson energy then standing still, send them out like projectiles.
He dodges between them with ease, blurring into nothingness and suddenly a foot kicks, straight upwards into my face.
Like when earthquake happens, it sends a crack running up the middle of the mask and shattering it instantly in half then because of the Spiritual Pressure it shatters again in tiny fragments that glint in the artificial light as I feel myself, slowly fall backwards in slow motion.
It was like, when I had been taken over by my Hollow, falling through water and when I land on the sand - it is with muffled thump as the pieces of the mask fall around my head. I breathe in and back out, while he comes up to me then looks down at me.
"Shiro!? Are you okay?" He asks me, coming up to me and looking down at me, while I just stare at the ceiling then breathe in and out, gently as my chest rises and falls.
I sit up and get up, slowly then turning walk away from him. A fair distance and holding my hand, call the particles of the mask to me. They shudder on the sand, like they were almost alive and soon come into my hand forming the mask as it once was.
"Again. Prepare yourself." I said, while turning slightly to look back at him and he bows slightly in acknowledgment at those words as I slide the mask back on.
Soon opening my eyes and waiting for him to make the first move.
(Time Skip - After Battle)
"That's better. My bones, don't ache anymore, now." Grimmjow moans, while relaxing against the edge of the steam pool that were in and placing both hands on the rock ledge then closing his eyes for wee while.
It was largest of the two and I was across from, sipping a cup of hot sake with one hand and just relaxing, while the pool healed the bruises he managed to inflict on me, during our training then look at him.
He had changed, caring deeply for Ichigo's child Li-Li and enjoying her company. Today, though before we had started training, I had heard Ichigo, crying in the corridor and would have gone to comfort him, ask him what was wrong.
Yet, I hadn't. I had allowed his lover to do it and my sixth sense was telling that Ichigo was fearing for his children and their safety then suddenly feel a hand touch my chest.
I look up to see that Grimmjow, had waded silently over to me and is looking at me in way that is making my heart start to thud against my ribcage then he lays his head down on my chest. He doesn't say anything to me and maybe this was because he wasn't used to being in a make-shift family like this.
"If you're afraid of dying. Tell me, Grimmjow. Because I'm here for you to be someone you can confide in." I said, which makes him shift slightly in my grip and I look down at him, seeing that tears have formed in his eyes.
"Yes. But, I'm also afraid to lose the one I have fallen for. Even though they love another." He says, while my heart skips a beat and I push him away from me in the process then rise, water running down my body and back into the steam pool.
I now feel conflicted. Grimmjow, was saying that he was afraid of losing someone who loved another, yet the only person I could think of was me, by just the way he said it.
He has risen and wades up to me, making the water move out like waves moving across the sand on a beach then he is right up against me, bending his head up then tentively placing his lips against mine to test my reaction.
I was going against everything. I was betraying my Mate – Renji – and feeling bad, yet my hands come up and take hold of him, pulling Grimmjow, flush against me. I wade him backwards, dashing him right up against the rock face of the steam pool.
My hands slide downwards and lift his thighs up, hitching them around my waist, while my mind is screaming at me to internally stop what I'm doing, right now.
It felt like I was standing at the top of a cliff, ready to just fall into the waters below then my own body betrays me, which makes him let go of my lips to cry out in the silence of the steam pool as shove my hips forwards into his.
And I plunge downwards into the choppy waters and allow them to pull me down to where the monster of the deep lurks. The one who waits for me.