Author's Note

First and foremost I'd like to apologize for the extreme delay of this chapter, but now with SMT4 about to be released in the states and a Persona 5 announcement potentially on the horizon I could think of no better time to resume my writing here.

First thing you might notice is that I have dropped the Azure from my penname. There's no particularly huge reason for this, but just so people don't get confused somehow I'm going to leave my avatar the same as it's always been for the time being.

So with that aside, let's get started. Updates should be back to their normal schedule past this point.

2.4 Affability

April 18th, 2011
For Now, My Name is Yu Narukami.

No matter how prepared I find myself to be, it would seem that things just get worse and worse without warning.

I don't even remember half of the details – I'm too busy fighting for my life at the moment to really care about how things ended up this way, although it had something to do with Chie being annoying enough that we were forced to bring her with us when we went after Yukiko the next day. I really should've seen this coming, but I suppose I was too concerned about Yukiko's wellbeing at the time to really be bothered by Chie's insistence to come along with us.

No more than five minutes after we'd gone into the TV she had run off on her own – and in giving chase we found ourselves surrounded by Shadows –

This place was a standard looking European castle, the only real difference being the presence of more Shadows than I knew what to do with. Luckily enough Yosuke's been ready and raring to go this whole time – every time I manage to fuck up he manages to make up for my mistake with his own Persona, Jiraiya, who seemed far more wind oriented than Izanagi was, very much like the Shadow that I'd beaten only two short days ago. Most of the ones surrounding us were incredibly weak, but they were still just as dangerous as any other Shadow, particularly to Chie who had somehow managed to bypass them all.

Eventually it seems as though Yosuke is going to faint from exhaustion – but I'd managed to find some fairly odd looking plant crap in an old box on the previous floor that evidently could help prolong our inevitable shutdown. Yosuke's reluctance to shove the foreign substance down his throat was actually substantial – there wasn't much sense to any of this, at least from a psychological standpoint, but at least we had a fighting chance now, given how Yosuke's new Persona could make up for every weakness that Izanagi had with its hefty magic focus. Izanagi didn't really seem all that suited to shooting off lightning bolts anyway – his physical brawn seemed to have more of an effect on everything we came across, although on the downside it left me even more prone to collapsing from exhaustion than Yosuke was.

Fortunately Yosuke could handle that problem, although only to the extent that it would make the fatigue a little less apparent – it was still a mental battle to keep going, but as long as Chie was still at risk the two of us could probably keep going almost no matter what.

There's not much else to this place – the Shadows are cruel and unusual and they attack in large groups – they most certainly understand the concept of strength in numbers, but even at that the Shadows individually seem to hit harder when they're unified compared to when we take them on solo.

The more we go on the more and more of them we take down – it gets to the point where we've gotten good enough at it that we realize that these monsters could turn into Personas, and so that implied that they could suffer from the same sort of ailments that our Personas were prone to. Knowing this our trek through the castle turned into more of a murder simulation than anything else –

People who take up boxing tend to enjoy the fight more than anything else. When they're in the ring they're in a whole other world from the one they're used to. The exhilaration and the raw emotions drive them to keep on fighting and to fight with everything they had – something that they might not have been able to replicate anywhere else. In the ring you are threatened, perhaps not with your life, but threatened with injury. With risk. And risk is quite attractive, even of only the reward is intoxicating.

For the two of us this was not the case. There was no exhilaration. There was only the tension of being killed. There was nothing we were risking but our lives. No matter how much money seemed to fall from the corpses of our victims all of it meant nothing if we died –

It was because someone's life was in danger. It was because if we failed someone we knew and someone we were close to would suffer the worst fate – because someone would end up like Yosuke. Someone would end up looking themselves in the face and wanting nothing more than for their life to end.

That was why we could fight. That was why we could force ourselves to do this. Because for someone to suffer at the hands of their own Shadow not only undermined that individual, but all of us collectively.

But –

But the fight grows long and we grow weary.

We find ourselves climbing a staircase after a full forty minutes of almost non-stop Shadow killing and hallway dashing – it would seem that the labyrinthine nature of this castle would prove to be the biggest obstacle of all, as no matter how good we got at killing Shadows and no matter how many weaknesses we could exploit we would always have a finite limit. And unless we could move through this castle quickly, we'd be far too exhausted to fight whatever was at the top floor.

We really weren't consciously fighting. That much was made clear to me. Instead we were just killing. We were killing foe after foe, searching for some kind of end point to it all. It really didn't matter who we were saving, or why we were even there at that point –

There were simply too many Shadows for our egos to deal with – on a level that neither of us could understand our foes, despite falling to us one by one, were tearing us apart.

We were fighting to reach an 'end' and while we were there, climbing that staircase, only the part of us that was left was the part that could reach that end. The part of us that had decided what we were doing had been left at the door – all that we were doing was 'acting'.

It didn't matter what that end was – but unless we reached it we couldn't stop. The irrationality in our thoughts alone would be enough to get us killed.

But we were still alive – and only because of them.

This part of us that could fight, and not only just fight but fight well – it wasn't a side that either of us knew we had, but at the same time it was a side that was always there.

We always had the capacity to fight like this – to fight ourselves. To fight the aspects of humanity that we try our hardest to discard. And we fight fire with fire – Shadow with Shadow. But because of how underdeveloped our Shadow half was and how useless the Ego was, we had no way of fighting back on our own – not without them.

Without our Personas we were nothing more than that – we were nothing more than weak Shadows that could barely hold a candle to any single one that we'd slain on our way here. Without our Personas we almost have no meaning in a place like this. And so I can finally understand just how screwed Chie will be if she gets attacked, provided she hasn't already cracked from being trapped under the pressure.

Eventually we finally reach the end at the top of the second set of stairs that we find – We find a set of double doors that Teddie promptly warns us about.

"There's something on the other side, guys…" He trails off, his fear rather evident.

"More Shadows, eh…?" Yosuke sighs. "How the hell did Chie manage to even get this far?"

I don't reply. I really can't reply. Because I'm just so damn exhausted.

While we finally had the opportunity to rest here, the strain on my body wasn't any less tremendous. Only now it was much worse – I felt like I was going to lose my mind.

After all, fighting those Shadows was already bad enough if not for the inane screaming.

Yosuke likely didn't hear a word because of the music he had blasting in his ears the whole time. Evidently it helped him focus, but it also served to drown out the cries.

The Shadows are in pain. They're crying out in agitation. They're trying so desperately to escape from something, but it's all too apparent that it's not us they're trying to run from.

There's something wrong about this place. And not even just this castle – this whole dimension was corrupt by some strange force that I really couldn't understand. This place felt so familiar to me, almost like I could take a nap for hours on that studio platform and not have a care in the world, but at the same time it felt as though there was some malicious force that was tearing away at everything and everyone inside.

Of course if the cries were just inane screaming, I wouldn't care as much.

But they were all saying things in the same gargled voice –

The more I hack away at them, the more the voices seemed to permeate. The louder they became. The more intense the emotions they projected. And –

And the more familiar their words became.

Come on, this fight's not over!
No. Don't get scared. I'm with you.
That bastard! We have to beat him, no matter what!
I can't believe he's the one…!
I-Is that a Persona?! No way…!
That Looked Like it Hurt!
You can win this!
Go, senpai! Keep up the streak!
That's the way, senpai. Do some more damage.
That's great senpai. Go in for the kill.
That's great senpai. You really get me going.
S-Senpai? Are you okay?
Senpai no! Please get up.
Someone help senpai.
S-senpai? No!

At first they had been soft, practically nothing more than murmurs. But the screams had gradually gotten louder and louder. These words that expressed an array of feelings, all converted into a desperate cry that would never end – It was driving me mad. It was driving me over the edge. The more and more I thought about all of this the more I felt the confusion settling in. The more I felt the need to question how I understood things.

And I was beginning to ask questions.

I was beginning to express uncertainties.

What if Chie's not even past here? What if all that awaits us past here is certain death? I sure as hell can't fight right now, and Yosuke's probably about to collapse too. What if Chie never even made it this far? What if the Shadows suddenly decide to break form and kill someone when it's bright and sunny? There's no way I can really assume anything about them – I was thinking rationally, but these creatures are far from rational.

What if –

But before I could torture myself any further, I see it out of the corner of my eye –

The blue butterfly, now hovering above the ground and flying and circles off in the corner of the room by the door.

The brilliance of that blue light –

It soothed me. There was just something about it that calmed the quelling sea of troubles in my heart.

I reach out to touch it –

And the moment I do, I'm filled with this extreme sort of warmth –

And while I'm still about to fall apart –

I feel as though it'll be alright if we keep going.

"…At any rate, we need to keep moving." I finally break my silence. "Chie can't be that much further ahead. She's not that fast."

"Alright, if you say so…" Yosuke sighs again. "Geez, I should've eaten a little more for lunch if I knew I'd be working this hard all day…"

Without any further hesitation the three of us decide it best to head through the doors –

Of course on the other side we almost regret that decision immediately, even if only because we were now faced with another worst case scenario –

Chie was standing there, in the middle of the room, listening to the disembodied voice of Yukiko go on and on –

Yukiko… Snow… I really just hate my name.
Narukami-kun probably doesn't even like it.
I'm sure Chie doesn't like my name either.
It's so… Dull. Boring. Just like the snow, I guess.
But that's what I am – dull and boring.
So it's perfect for me…
…
Hm…
Chie.
Chie, Chie, Chie…
That's a much better name.
But I don't deserve to have that name.
Because Chie's just such a wonderful person -
Without her I don't have anything.
Narukami-kun probably wouldn't even look at me again if Chie wasn't around.
She's such a good person –
And I'm nothing like her.
Nothing at all.
I'm nothing without Chie.
I'm such a horrible woman.
Taking advantage of her like that –
If she never has to look at me again, I think I'd be content.

And –

And standing across from her –

Is another Chie.

"It's funny." The Shadow speaks freely. "It's really funny. So funny I wanna die laughing – she's the one who's being taken advantage of here… Yukiko… What a tramp."

"W-What the hell are you saying something like that for?!" Chie fires up right away – her personality was the absolute worst for a scenario like this.

"Everyone wants in on Yukiko… Everyone wants a piece of the Amagi Challenge. But no one would look twice at boring, one-dimensional Chie, right? But Yukiko – she's such an idiot. She doesn't even realize that she's the one who has everything… She's so far above me, but she's wrapped around my finger. She thinks I know every little thing about her and only cares about her best interest… Isn't it great? To be able to dominate a 'perfect' girl like that?! Being able to do whatever I want when I should be the one with no friends? Ahh…" She wraps her arms around herself for a needlessly suggestive effect. "…If only her precious 'Narukami-kun' had stayed home… She'd be all mine, forever."

"That's… That's not right…! That's just wrong!" Chie starts shouting again.

And so it comes together. I can see where I fit into this now –

Chie had been somewhat obsessive over Yukiko, perhaps for quite some time. It was more likely than not, especially considering her Shadow's particular brand of disdain for me that Yukiko had at one point or another told her everything – she'd told her about every insecurity or trouble that she'd ever had and Chie had probably offered to be her friend despite all of it –

Then when Yukiko gradually got older and became a hot topic of discussion, Chie knew that she was slowly slipping away from her. But even more prominently, Chie felt inferior. As they both grew older Yukiko's body held more weight than Chie's personality. The sort of relationship they had, despite being as unadulterated as all relationships were, could very rarely stand the test of the shift in society – while their bond could remain strong there was no guarantee that it could last forever. And if Yukiko were to ever realize the sort of social life she was essentially entitled to involved more elements than just her bond with Chie, Chie's 'worth' would be the wrench in the gears – Chie had come to this conclusion rather quickly. But Yukiko didn't care about any of that – she only cared about Chie and only seemed interested in preserving their friendship, uninterested in that other life she could have with other people.

And from there Chie was her whole social life. Only Chie had come to develop a dominatrix complex upon realizing that what she had come to value and what she had come to embody were meaningless in the eyes of the social world she'd been drafted into along with everyone else –

Chie was one of a kind. And that was what made it impossible for her to be anything that she wasn't.

This is what she was – a person who had to take advantage of someone and pull them down to their level to escape from it – to escape from the world she hated but had no choice but to live in.

It was Yosuke's problem, although from a slightly different perspective.

"Who are you to even say something like that?!" Chie keeps on shouting.

"Hey, partner…" Yosuke whispers to me. "If we stop her now –"

"We can't stop her now. If we try to talk her out of this it'll only be a matter of time before she ends up like this again – Yukiko's probably the only one who she could listen to right now anyways, not that it would even do her any good. She needs to get all of this out in the open – just like with you, she can't keep ignoring this."

"Hm…" Yosuke is clearly anxious – he wants to keep Chie from getting hurt, first and foremost, but he had apparently accepted that she had to feel the burn like he had.

Only a few more seconds go by before Chie loses it –

'You're not me!' seems to be the most basic way of rejecting yourself. Because just as Yosuke had said it so does Chie.

And her Shadow becomes another massive entity – This one with an oddly banana shaped mask and rather skimpy clothing, seated atop a small tower of puppets wearing the Yasogami uniform, all struggling to hold her up.

This would indeed be problematic, not even just because of the fight that was about to begin, but because Chie's Shadow was out for blood – my blood.

Be careful with this one, alright? Izanagi warns me. We're not going to kick her ass the same way we skewered that frog.

And sure enough, the moment our fight begins and Chie is sent flying Yosuke forgets about his job and runs to her side – leaving the Shadow free to launch a gust of wind right at me –

I manage to get out of the way fast enough but she follows up with a strong snap of the whip in her hands – I'm unable to avoid this strike, but Izanagi manages to absorb most of the damage.

And from there it's just a flurry – she swings the whip wildly, half of her strikes not even landing anywhere near me –

With a sharp screech the space around us suddenly seems to drop in temperature –

And a massive wall of extremely jagged ice suddenly shoots up out of the ground, sending me flying. The sheer cold of the wall tears away at my skin – it didn't hurt as much as the wind seemed to but having been sent flying certainly took the wind out of me.

By the time I rise to my feet Yosuke has made his way over and manages to strike the Shadow with a wind burst of his own – the Shadow clearly feels the strength of that blow and is forced backward, the tower of puppets swaying harshly –

Yosuke moves in for another strike, this time allowing Jiraiya to get in a solid blow to the Shadow's face – the strike carries enough weight behind it to almost knock the Shadow off of the tower, but it manages to recover fast enough to grab hold of Jiraiya before he can make his escape –

I send Izanagi forward to help him get away, but it's too late – the Shadow electrocutes Jiraiya through where they are joined, sending Yosuke through a brief period of immobility as he feels the shock as harshly has Jiraiya does – as Izanagi rushes forward I try to move to Yosuke's side to prevent him from being left completely open, but with another snap of that god forsaken whip I'm forced to back off –

Fortunately she didn't have enough hands to keep all three of us at bay – Izanagi manages to get close enough that she's within slashing distance – with a swing of Izanagi's sword she's forced to let go of Jiraiya as the tower of puppets suddenly spasms for a moment before managing to leap off the ground with their master in tow –

However, she's a bit too slow and is still at least in Jiraiya's range.

Yosuke coughs. "Heh… Not when you pull a stunt like that, you bitch…!"

Jiraiya spirals towards the Shadow and manages to land another solid blow to its face, although in the scuffle that follows he gets grabbed again – Izanagi sees this coming, however, and moves in while anticipating another opening.

He has his chance to strike, but another wall of ice surrounds the Shadow, blocking Izanagi off – but that doesn't stop him. He shatters the ice with his sword and continues to charge through, tackling the Shadow with his whole body, sending the tower of puppets off balance completely and causing it to collapse.

The Shadow manages to leap from the tower before it can touch the ground and releasing Jiraiya it momentarily distracts Izanagi with a bolt of lightning – there wasn't any chance in hell that it would've done any substantial amount of damage to him, but it was rather obviously not the point –

In the moment Izanagi pauses to shield himself the Shadow tries to reform the puppet tower and manages to do so swiftly enough that it never touches the ground and with a swift but inhumanly strong kick it sends Izanagi flying into the floor, his impact creating a decent sized crater in the floor – but in the moment it wasn't making any real attempt to defend itself Jiraiya manages to slip in and twirls his standard gust of wind into a boxing glove for his right fist –

And with a lightning fast punch the Shadow is almost set off balance again – almost. But by the time Jiraiya realizes it isn't immobile it's already too late – the Shadow wraps its whip around Jiraiya's waist and pulls him closer. Jiraiya resists but with both of its hands on the whip the Shadow can't be overpowered –

And Izanagi finally takes his opening and with a forward trust his blade pierces the whip, freeing Jiraiya and snapping it completely. The Shadow tries to pull off another ice spell but Jiraiya moves to tackle the puppet tower, breaking her focus for just enough time for Izanagi to get in a final blow – with a well timed kick he manages to send the Shadow flying off of its tower once more, spiraling uncontrollably into the wall on the far end of the room.

Upon flipping off the Shadow as it goes flying, Izanagi extends his fist to Jiraiya, apparently trying to have a bro-fist moment over their victorious teamwork. Jiraiya doesn't seem to get the gesture and blinks at him several times before heading off towards the fallen Shadow while Izanagi is left shrugging his shoulders.

The hell is wrong with that guy? Does he not get out much or something? He sighs.

The Shadow doesn't stay down for long- in a matter of moments it's up on its own two feet, apparently completely undeterred by Izanagi's kick. Jiraiya manages to pummel it down onto the ground again with an even higher frequency of his blinding fast punches, but at this point it seems like our Personas aren't really doing all that much to deter it.

"Something's kinda off, don't you think?" Yosuke eventually breaks our silence, having at least somewhat recovered from the pain of that electric shock he'd suffered earlier.

"Honestly the way things are right now I'm not sure if this is going to work out the way we want it to."

"And that means…?"

"Chie's Shadow is… Different from yours. Izanagi seems to think so to."

Yosuke looks at me a little dumbfounded. "…Wait, you can, like, talk to your Persona?"

"Uh… I kind of assumed that we could both do that."

"Nah, I don't get a word out of mine. But if I'm being honest he's having an easier time with this Shadow than yours is."

"I can sort of see that." Granted Jiraiya hadn't been hit with as heavy an amount of firepower as Izanagi had.

…

…

And then it hits me.

So that was the problem –

She was after my blood. She was targeting me because I was what stood between her and Yukiko. So…

Jiraiya had been hit fairly badly earlier on in the fight. But he was never out cold on the ground for as long as Izanagi had been – in fact, he'd only been hit with that electric shock – every other time he'd been attacked directly by the Shadow he'd just been grabbed. The Shadow wouldn't let Izanagi anywhere near her, while Jiraiya was being pulled into several full on attacks fairly consistently.

"…Let me handle this on my own for a bit. You need to get Chie back on her feet." I speak my thoughts out loud.

Yosuke looks dumbfounded. "W-Wait, are you serious?!"

"If I'm right… Well, you'll find out if I'm right."

Jiraiya somewhat begrudgingly backs off as Yosuke moves away from the fight and towards Chie – the Shadow is left with only Izanagi to fight. As I had expected, its opening move is that ice wall, which seemed to be its most threatening move – the ice itself wasn't as detrimental to Izanagi as the wind had been. Instead it was just that much more powerful. And as far as I could tell the only one the Shadow was interested in hitting with it was Izanagi.

Izanagi struggles severely at that point – all of his attacks are met with the same kind of ferocity that the Shadow had expressed at the start of the fight. His blows don't amount to very much – there's a certain extent to which I could tell that I was doing damage, but the Shadow seemed to take everything like a sponge. It showed no signs of slowing down or anything that would suggest that my attacks were doing anything of any serious merit.

Yosuke manages to work Chie over to where we are – she's still completely out of it, but at least she was able to actively move now. Granted at the moment she was like Yosuke had been before – unwilling to even stand, let alone to face her most pressing issues head on.

"I hope you know what you're doing." Yosuke sighs. "You should look at yourself in a mirror right now – you look like you're gonna faint about as much as she does."

"I know exactly what I'm doing. Which is why I'm going tag out for a moment."

Yosuke gives me yet another stunned look. "…Are you seriously going to let me fight that thing alone?"

"I'm not going to be of much help here. She's denying me too completely. I'm part of her problem as much as Yukiko is. Right now you're the only one here that isn't part of her whole complex. You're someone she knows, and knows well enough at that."

Yosuke shakes his head. "Dude, that's exactly why I shouldn't be the one trying to pull her out of this."

"Do you want to save her, or not?" I tell him straight up how it is.

"Of course I do, but –"

"You don't think you 'deserve' to help her or something?"

Yosuke grunts with frustration as he tries to come up with a response. "It's just that I don't… What the hell do you want me to convey to her?"

What indeed.

Perhaps I'd spoken too soon. I'd decided that it was impossible for me to get through to Chie, which most certainly made sense. But at the same time I really didn't know how anyone could get through to Chie, aside from perhaps Yukiko. How exactly could Yosuke resolve this situation on his own?

"You heard her bitching from before, right?"

"Well, yeah, how could I have missed it?"

"…Any ideas? Any clue as to what it is she's trying to get across? Because I'll be honest with you. I'm completely out of ideas."

"Eh…?! How the hell do you expect me to have any chance, then?"

Before I'm able to give him any sort of response Chie's Shadow lunges towards us directly – it would seem that Izanagi was unable to keep things at bay for as long as I'd hoped and now –

And now I'm sent flying across the room myself, the back of my head slamming into the far off wall – the moment I manage to get my bearings I realize that not only am I completely spent, but I'm also too far away to get anywhere near them without being repelled – I'd run out of juice, dooming Chie and Yosuke to the Shadow's whims.

But –

But before the Shadow is able to strike, Jiraiya appears above them and Yosuke manages to stand tall, shielding Chie from her other half's undying fury. He hadn't the slightest clue how to put a stop to this, but even then he wasn't going to give in – he was likely running on pure adrenaline at this point, but there was nothing left to hold him back –

When Yosuke was put in a do or die situation, it seemed he was the most reliable – he would always do, and the strength of his glass-half-full mentality would shine through.

He wanted to protect Chie. That much was clear. His reason didn't matter – after all, he left his reason at the door.

His raw emotions – every aspect of his Shadow that he had come to terms with was expressed through his Persona – and his Persona would take a beating for Chie, even if Yosuke himself could not.

Jiraiya begins to sustain blow after blow as the Shadow wails down on him with its fists, having no weapon and likely had been pushed to the limit of her spell casting capabilities when Izanagi had held her off. Jiraiya was sturdy enough to keep standing tall despite how every strike would eat away at him from the inside and Yosuke's remarkably high tolerance for pain kept things slightly more even, despite how the Shadow was clearly winning.

With a very loud sigh, Yosuke starts speaking. "You can hear me, right? Or did you pass out or some shit like that?"

Chie is only somewhat responsive, her daze still mostly in effect. She fidgets around, but Yosuke wasn't able to see for himself if she'd reacted to his words at all.

"Well, either way, I'm only going to say this shit once, alright?" He grunts as the Shadow suddenly pounds on Jiraiya with enough extra force to almost send him off balance. "You know what you're problem is? It's that you're so hell-bent on getting other people to like you. And don't think I haven't noticed – you know that other girls won't look twice at you because you're not full of yourself and it shows. You know that not many guys want you as their girlfriend and it shows. People don't accept you because in their eyes you're a mess who can barely even call herself a girl – but you know what? Fuck them. Fuck them all."

Chie tilts her head upward – she sees Yosuke standing over her, speaking his mind about as freely as possible.

"Fuck trying to fit in. Fuck trying to be what people want you to be. You're not Yukiko's best friend because you're a girl. Because you're a certain kind of person she wants you to be. She's your friend because she likes you. You're not 'dragging her down to your level' or any stupid shit like that. You're friends, and that's not going to change because you're getting older. Yukiko doesn't have to depend on you, and you sure as hell don't have to depend on her."

The Shadow begins to wail even louder – Jiraiya is almost at his limit. I try to stand, but my bones are just too weak to do anything else – this was all in Yosuke's hands.

"Yukiko's not like other people, and that's why you're drawn to her. But she's drawn to you for the same reason. You're both friends because you can both feel the same way about how things are – you're both people that don't want to be thrown under the rug. Who don't want to be abandoned just because they want to be who they are, and neither of you are the only people in the world that're like that…!" He grunts again as Jiraiya takes a rather fatal looking blow to the side of the head –

His guard is completely broken, and in all of a moment the Shadow takes hold of Jiraiya's neck, and with a sickening crack snaps it in two. Thankfully Yosuke only felt the pain of the attack and hadn't been affected by it as well .

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me…!" Yosuke shouts from the pain –

Jiraiya crumples to the floor, clearly dead, at least for the time being. Chances were by the time he could recover it would be far too late.

The Shadow huffs as it raises its fists for another strike – Chie, still submissive to it all, shields herself for the final blow.

Yosuke takes the blow in its entirety, managing to grab a hold of one of the Shadow's arms to lessen the intensity – the other fist seems to break his shoulder, but given how his stance remained unwavering it must have only damaged a portion of it.

He gasps, the pain almost too much for his body to handle – his body is shaking almost uncontrollably, but he still remains standing. "…Society sucks ass. People suck ass too. But fuck it. Fuck all of it. If you can… find just one other person who… Sees things the way you do, there's always a way around it. If you and just one other person can see things the way they are but still be able to wake up in the morning and put a smile on your face, no matter how fake it is, it'll be fine… Do you get it yet? There are fucking millions of people who could be that one other person, and as long as you don't stop being who you are, as long as you don't stop being Chie Satonaka and start being some dumb slut like everyone else, you'll keep meeting them, and then one day you'll wake up and you've suddenly got all the friends you could ever want… And…!"

The Shadow's screaming almost drowns out Yosuke's voice as it rains down on him one final time with a jab sent straight towards his face –

He manages to block the strike, trying with all his might to push the Shadow back. The two are locked together, the Shadow's physical strength apparently starting to wane –

"…And if Yukiko's an idiot for screwing all those other people… If she's an idiot for wanting to know you, for wanting to be your friend… That makes the guy behind us an idiot, and it makes me an even bigger idiot… Hell, I can't speak for anyone else, but I sure as hell know I'd be an idiot for the rest of my life…!" He grits his teeth, the pain slowly winning out. "I'm not dumb enough to make promises I can't keep, but… But I fucking swear, right now – before you know it you're going to be in a room full of idiots just like us, and you're not going to know why the hell you ever thought we were dumb in the first place!"

The Shadow moves to attack again, this time much to Yosuke's dismay – there was very little chance he could take another blow like the ones he'd been suffering -

I take my chances and send Izanagi forth – with a fairly weak swing of his blade he manages to bash in the Shadow's face –

This time the Shadow finally falls apart, much like Yosuke's had – and in a matter of moments, once the dark haze fades away all that's left is Chie's battered and bruised form, still clearly capable of tearing us apart at will.

And with a frustrated shout Chie finally breaks her silence. "That's enough already!" The Shadow stops midway through its stride towards Yosuke. "That's enough. He's right. We've gotta stop this."

"We…?" The Shadow speaks, barely above a whisper.

Chie gets off the floor and although somewhat wobbly at first she manages to walk towards her doppelganger – I sigh with relief. At least I knew this had ended without any particularly severe injuries, although Yosuke was probably beaten up too badly for me to say that accurately.

"All my life I've been protecting myself. That's how it's always been. I've always seen people as things that I could rely on to better myself, but it wasn't until I realized that I was the one being treated as a thing that I understood just how lost I was… Yukiko was the only one who looked past that material part of me and just wanted to be my friend, even when I didn't deserve her at all. And the more things changed the more I thought she was just going to be like everyone else, so I started to hold onto her and wouldn't let go, steering her away from other people so she wouldn't stop looking at me – I didn't believe in 'good people', and I definitely didn't see them all around me even though they were always there. But I'm an idiot, so it only makes sense that I wouldn't."

Chie grabs hold of her Shadow's shoulder and bashes their heads together. "I'm done trying to protect myself. I don't need to protect myself. I don't matter anymore. You and me – we're gonna save Yukiko, we're going to tell her things the way they are, and if she doesn't want to speak to us ever again then that's fine. I'm not good for her anyway. Because I don't need her to be me – as long as I can look myself in the mirror… and as long as I can protect one other person who can respect me for it, then I can put up with whatever shit other people want me to go through."

Her Shadow remains completely silent – but before too long, as Yosuke's Shadow had, its expression softens as it slowly nods its head.

And her Shadow becomes a Persona –

Only moments later she finds herself exhausted, and almost crumples to the floor on the spot. But she manages to keep herself standing long enough to turn around –

Yosuke suddenly coughs up a tremendous amount of blood and falls over –

"Teddie…!" I call out. "You're gonna have to pull some weight this time."

The bear in question hops along towards Yosuke, who Chie was already attempting to revive. I manage to pull myself to my feet without much issue, but it would seem that several of my ribs were damaged during that fight. Chie's Shadow certainly meant business and given how I'd been practically mauled by her ice walls and Yosuke had essentially been beaten to within an inch of his life, and I could tell that these Shadows would only get more primal as we went on. I could only imagine how out of control Yukiko's Shadow would be, although for the moment I didn't have time to think about her condition when Yosuke was potentially at his mortal limit.

I walk myself over to where the others were.

"Christ…" Yosuke groans. "I think your Shadow was more of a bitch than mine was."

"Can you stand?" I try to cut to the chase. "Not to undermine how busted up you are, but if we hang around here for too long chances are we're going to get bum rushed by the Shadows again."

Chie glances towards the staircase beyond us – she clearly wanted to go after Yukiko but she kept silent about it. "Don't worry if you can't – I'll carry you out myself if I have to. We'll get out of here right away." She reassures him as Teddie tries to wriggle his stubby arms underneath Yosuke –

It ends up taking all three of us to hoist Yosuke in the air, although Chie made up for my general lack of usefulness given how I couldn't really lift anything right now without straining myself beyond belief. Yosuke's healing power would ironically be rather useful right about now, but we had to make do without it for the time being.

All the while Chie refuses to look at me in the eyes – but it's already too late.

At this point I've already seen the look in her eyes – her heart had been pried open and I had been there to see all the blood spill out. While she didn't seem to concerned about Yosuke having been there to witness her breakdown, I was far too much of a stranger to her. All I was to her was that one guy who until a few moments ago was the biggest threat to her relationship with Yukiko. If she didn't want to speak to me any time soon, that was fine, but –

The smallest number of people possible had to be present for Yukiko's meltdown. Even more specific than that – I couldn't let anyone else come with me. I was the only one who could be there, otherwise the strain on her heart would simply be too much.

On our way back the Shadows pose a great threat to us – we manage to dodge the majority of them but we were still attacked by enough that Izanagi had more than enough trouble on his hands – his senses were about as dulled as mine were right now, but fortunately we manage to avoid the majority of the stronger Shadows as we made our way down to the bottom floor.

All the while it becomes rather apparent to me that I'm the only one who can hear those voices. Neither Chie nor Teddie seem to react to them at all. As for why that was the case? Well rather obviously that was beyond me, just as much as everything else about this bizarre world was.

On the way back Yosuke starts to speak his mind. He goes on about how we're now a team and we have to do everything we could to save Yukiko. Somewhere along the line he nominates me to be the leader of this newly formed team and Chie doesn't object –

But more importantly, we had all come to a common conclusion with a common goal – we were going to save Yukiko and anyone else that was tossed into this world unwillingly. We all might have had slightly different reasons, but that was the beauty of it – we could all fight to the very end because we were all determined. We were determined to see this through to the end for our own reasons and so nothing would be able to hold us down.

The moment that resolution becomes apparent –

I feel something within me. Something like a spark going off in some corner of my brain.

My vision swims for a moment and I almost let go of Yosuke, but I don't pay his light objection any mind –

I can hear a voice –

A voice that was clearly my own, but at the same time clearly wasn't –

Thou who hast braved the forest of death for us all
Thou art I and I am thou
Thy bonds grant thee strength. They bring thee closer to the truth.
Henceforth, thou shalt be blessed by the benevolence of the Fool Arcana…

April 19th, 2011
For Now, My Name is Yu Narukami.

The evening that followed that whole incident sucked. Tremendously. It took way too much work to hide my injuries from Nanako and Dojima and it took even more work to get myself to sleep that night. I couldn't let myself get treated by anyone but Yosuke – there wasn't any sense in troubling my already troubled guardian and his emotionally fragile daughter any more than they already were troubled by my being here, and so I put myself through a normal routine with several cracked ribs eating away at me the whole time.

I don't even really remember the details of today – Chie might've apologized for letting things get out of hand but the only thing of note that stood out was that Yosuke was sick at home, although it honestly made more sense for him to go straight to a hospital. Then again he could've just lied to her to keep her from getting out of control, but the point was that Yosuke wasn't going to be actively doing much of anything, at least not for the next few days.

Unfortunately the next few days couldn't be spent sitting around and doing nothing. I had to pull Yukiko out of there before something happened to her – I couldn't afford to wait. Even if she wasn't in immediate danger of being killed…

Well, I didn't want to put the possibility out of my head that she could off herself before I could get to her –

Of course this was based on one very particular event that had happened back then, before I'd left her – something that I really shouldn't get into until the time is right.

In any event, the possibility was there. Her Shadow most certainly knew so as well. And given how much animosity her Shadow doubtlessly had bottled up, chances were even now she was being backed into a corner. Backed into another scenario where she would believe she has no way out. And if that were to happen –

I had to go back into the TV today. I couldn't wait for Yosuke to recover and for Chie to mentally prepare herself for the fight ahead – hesitation would result in defeat. And I couldn't lose. Not to her.

And so I went back into the TV from the Junes monitor –

Oddly enough the studio platform seemed awfully… quiet this time around. It was then that I noticed that Teddie wasn't standing in attention, beaming at me like he usually was –

Instead he was seated on the floor a few feet away from the entrance, staring blankly straight ahead at nothing in particular. He didn't seem to even notice that I was there.

I walk over and peer down at him before poking him several times on the head – he seemed largely unresponsive. Perhaps he was asleep, if that were even possible. I decide not to question it and proceed onward – I already knew the path to the castle and I didn't want to waste any time. My movement is a little sluggish due to my unhealed injuries but I can't let those stop me.

I find myself able to resume my travels from the room we'd faced Chie's Shadow in – when I open the front door I'm suddenly teleported to that space just before where the blue butterfly had been – although now it had vanished. I suppose I couldn't assume that it would hang around forever.

I proceed onward –

But this time, when I enter that massive room, she's right there in front of me –

Yukiko's Shadow, with that same vacant expression and that same dress that Yukiko wouldn't be caught dead wearing.

I was certain that she wasn't going to make it this easy for me. But at least I knew that she was flamboyant enough to want to show off in front of a lot of people.

After all, Yukiko's biggest issue was her lack of friends. Her personality was never as suited to it as she would've liked it to be. It was clear from the whole 'quest for her prince charming' bit that she was desperately trying to find someone to take her away from all of it. It was a bit less straightforward than I would've liked for it to be, but this was all a call for help, specifically aimed at both myself and Chie. She wanted one of us to take her and everything she was with her. But the key point to all of this was that it didn't matter to her who took her away. And that alone made it perfectly clear to me what her mindset was going into this –

Upon noticing me the Shadow frowns. "There's only one of you today? That's disappointing."

"I'd figure that we could cut out all the bullshit and get this over with. I think you've spent enough time mocking yourself on live television to get your point across."

She laughs. "If you think so, then why is this still not enough…?"

"Not enough for her to accept you? Because she doesn't know why you exist or why she has to accept you. Pointing out all of your faults like this only makes it worse. Making it clear that you're full of flaws is a bit redundant, don't you think…?" I draw my katana. "Ah, but you don't listen to reason, do you? You're a Shadow – and like all Shadows all that applies to you are your base instincts. All people are the same – if they're trapped they want to be free. You can act out as much as you want – Yukiko has more self control than you ever will."

She narrows her eyes at me. "And you're so sure of that because…?"

"Don't act like you don't know. Yukiko is rejecting you because she wants to be what people expect her to be. She doesn't want to accept that she lacks the capacity to throw away her freedom and wants to believe that her shortcomings don't matter. That she can keep going on the way she is despite being trapped, but only if she has someone to lock in with her – she can't keep going like this, but you don't have any right to kill her over it."

"What makes you say that?" She says with a laugh.

"Because people are capable of change. Unlike you, she can change for the better. But all you're willing to do is continue to throw your tantrum like a child."

"Hm… But weren't you the one who said I don't act on anything but instinct?" She turns away. "You know as well as I do that she won't accept me… I refuse to be a part of her anymore."

"Then I'll kick your ass until you change your mind."

"Then why don't you come find me then, my prince?" With a haughty giggle she fades away into the darkness.

Without hesitation I continue onward, scaling the stairs at the end of the small hallway past that room.

This wasn't good enough. I had to let her go mad and I had to take her down myself. That was the only way to truly resolve this.

I fight through hordes and hordes of Shadows on my own – it was insanity, but I had to be the one to do this. I had to convey the truth to Yukiko and this was the only way I was ever going to do it.

I pick and choose my battles, electing to run from fights that Izanagi clearly stood no chance of winning. Every fight I'm forced into is another chance for me to die – Izanagi could only do so much and with every hit I took the closer I was to falling over and never getting back up. The further I explored the more dazed I became, and it only could grow worse and worse – there was no alleviation. Not with those voices constantly tearing away at my mind.

I keep on scaling the staircases, one after another, fighting Shadow after Shadow with limited success, all leading to a final battle with Yukiko's Shadow that I wasn't confident that I could win. But I didn't have a choice. Yukiko was constantly at risk and even if this place only killed people when it rained I couldn't let her stay in here even remotely that long.

Eventually I come to a floor that is a very linear and square hallway. Yukiko's Shadow taunts me as I enter, implying that she had set some sort of trap for me, but as I go from room to room searching for the source of her voice there doesn't seem to be anything at all in my way. Eventually I even find the staircase leading onward, but I elect to investigate the rest of the floor before pressing onward.

I eventually find her, alone in a rather dimly lit room that was in no particularly outstanding place.

She frowns again. "Hm…? Why didn't my trap work? Are you cheating or something?"

"Why would I even know what that means? Whatever trap you set evidently didn't work out for you –" I point my katana towards her. "And I see no better opportunity to put an end to all of this –"

Of course the moment I do so she suddenly vanishes. I hear her laugh from somewhere behind me before her voice fades out entirely. I sigh before leaving the room and heading back towards the staircase –

The rest of the climb is uneventful in the sense that Yukiko's Shadow did not try to interfere with me past that point. But the Shadows only got stronger and stronger. But despite how weak I was, I felt myself getting stronger right along with them – Izanagi's strength still had no parallel, even though it was largely impaired.

But the voices –

The voices still don't stop…

It's so redundant at this point. Perhaps the only reason why I'm complaining about it at all is because it gives me something to focus on besides how screwed I'd almost doubtlessly be once I reached the top of this castle.

But I couldn't let it stop me.

Because Yukiko's life was always constantly in danger…

…

It wasn't all that long before we'd split up. Yukiko had been driven into a corner – she'd always been a little depressed, but she'd gotten herself into such a rut that it began to express through everything. Her expression, her speech, and most prominently to her parents, at least her grades – she was slowly sinking into despair only because she'd taken my rejection of her to mean that she was untouchable. That there was no way she could ever move past the life she'd always had because no one in the outside world would accept her.

One evening she called me and casually told me that she was about to throw herself from the roof of the apartment building that they were staying at. It took some serious work, but I managed to talk her out of it. The fact that she'd called me proved that she wanted someone to tell her she was wrong and that everything would work out – and I'd done that for her, as ignorant as I was to what effect it would have on her afterward.

I knew there were people she cared about in Inaba. And I told her that as long as she had those people there wasn't anything she had to worry about. That she could live the way she wanted to.

Of course when she grew up the hollow nature of my words began to show itself. And she slowly slipped back into that despair. It made sense – people are always afraid of something, and that fear isn't something we can ever escape. But I had to expunge this fear from her permanently – she couldn't retrogress into this again. Especially not if I had the chance to save her from it twice.

And so I make my way towards that high point. Towards that climax.

And –

And eventually I reach the top floor, and I find the blue butterfly waiting for me.

…

…

Everything will be fine.

I'll stop her. I'll make her see –

And so I open the doors, and sure enough both Yukikos are there, the Shadow seated in an elegant throne while Yukiko struggled to even stand by the stairs. She'd already been in here for too long – her skin was pale enough and her eyes weary enough to suggest that not only had she been completely deprived of sleep but she had also been deprived of food and water – there was no way she could survive under those conditions for every long even if this world had some way to put off the damages of her suffering until it deemed the time right for her to die.

This was torture. There was no sense in any of this. Her Shadow couldn't make a point if the one she wanted to understand her most could barely keep herself awake.

"This ends here." I announce to them both. "No more running away. No more false promises.

"Oooh, look, our prince has arrived!" The Shadow gleefully announces while Yukiko only manages to look in my direction – she seems to want to speak, but she was apparently too weak to. "Well that wasn't much of a greeting."

"You see how ridiculous this is? Do you have even an iota of humility?"

"This is the way things have to be for people like us, don't you see? And she understands that too – after all, we're the same person. We both know that everything sucks. Our family sucks, our inn sucks – if Chie wasn't around I don't know how long I'd have been able to hold out…!"

Yukiko doesn't offer any reaction.

"People can't live alone – you're definitely right about that. But people only hurt each other. People always want to hold other people down – that goes for me too… I want someone to take me away, to a castle far away that I can live in for the rest of my life without a care in the world… Ah, but I can't have that either, can I?"

"What're you getting at?"

"Don't you see, Narukami-kuun? You're my castle. And Chie's my prince… But it seems that my prince will never come, will never see me the way I am, and I'll never have a castle all to myself… That's why I might as well just end it all right now…!"

I try to respond but I'm suddenly interrupted. "…That's enough…I'm not that weak…Not anymore…!" Yukiko finally cries out, her voice raspy and hoarse. "…You're nothing like me… That's the truth!"

The Shadow laughs. "You see? I'm always right… She doesn't want to accept me, so she never will!"

And so the Shadow takes on the dark haze and just like all the others it promptly transforms into another beast –

It was a massive bird with Yukiko's head in place of its own – but on top of that it was a bird trapped in a cage. I couldn't think of a design any more corny than this, but that was perhaps the whole purpose of this Shadow – to display the truth in as brutally obvious a way as possible for all to see.

"I am a Shadow, the true self…" The Shadow murmurs entirely out of character. "Try as hard as you might, my castle… I have no weaknesses."

We would certainly see about that –

I make my first strike with Izanagi at the ready – his first strike is fierce enough that it even manages to dent the cage, while my feeble attempt to strike at her as the cage descends to lunge at me barely does a thing – using her face as a beak the Shadow rams into me with an absurd amount of force while repelling Izanagi with a sudden burst of flame that only seems to burn at him, rather than set him on fire –

I move in again, this time muttering an incantation to physically protect myself from damage – Izanagi presses a paper slip against my back that shields me from the bulk of the Shadow's second strike and I manage to open a massive gash along the side of her neck. The Shadow howls in pain before sending a well timed fireball in my direction that Izanagi only barely manages to block – but immediately follows up by shifting her weight as far back as possible and swinging her cage right into me with a tremendous amount of force.

I'm sent flying backward – even with my protective spell I'd been hit far too hard. I manage to stand myself up, but as I do Izanagi is sent spiraling straight into me –

I manage to get myself out of the way to avoid being hit, but the moment I get my bearings the Shadow is once again hurtling straight towards me in that cage. I get out of the way for the most part – my sword arm is caught between the cage and the wall and for all intents and purposes is crushed.

I release my sword and as the Shadow backs away my arm limply falls to my side. I can move it, but only somewhat – it hurts too much to do anything productive with it, and I try my hardest not to look directly at it, as the sickening crunch I'd heard a matter of moments ago told me everything I needed to know –

And so I employ the old fashioned Joestar Family Strategy. I run.

I move out of the way of the next attack as I'm no longer even attempting to fight back. Izanagi manages to close in on her and passes a bolt of lightning through her cage, but upon taking that hit she arbitrarily begins to scream.

In a matter of moments a small Shadow materializes before her – it's an extremely short metallic looking thing wearing regal European clothes and based on the tacky hairdo and the rapier it held in one of its hands I could only assume it was masquerading as a European prince.

In a matter of moments it heads straight towards me, aimed to hunt me down –

The small prince manages to get a solid hit in when I stumble slightly on my path away from it – I manage to kick its head hard enough to knock it over, but the cut was certainly deep. The amount of strength this thing possessed was completely absurd for its size – I was fortunate that it was about as slow as molasses. Otherwise it probably would've been completely screwed over. I manage to outrun it long enough for Yukiko's Shadow to realize that its plan didn't work –

And then it shouts. "Enough!"

And with a massive roar it shoots a tiny ball of fire from its mouth –

And the moment it collides with the floor it explodes, the force probably equating to that of several bombs going off all at once. Izanagi was only a foot or two away from her – he's caught in the blast and likely doesn't survive it as is the small prince, while the recoil sends me flying across the room and straight towards one of the stained glass windows –

There was no way –

In one shot, with one attack, it was all over…?!

And before I can even realize what's about to happen the glass behind me shatters as I fly straight out the window – I get one final glimpse of Yukiko's ailing form as gravity takes hold of me and I begin to fall –

And I can see the ground, so many feet below me, slowly getting closer and closer as my descent speeds up –

And –

…

…

…

…

…

…

And I find myself staring up at that red and black vortex that served as the sky in this twisted world.

…

What happened? I was falling, but suddenly –

Suddenly everything just cut out. Like my brain stopped recording what I was seeing like a videotape that had run out of space.

There's clearly something firm beneath me – but aside from that I can't feel anything. I can't feel my arms, my legs – everything is completely numb. I fear trying to move – the moment I knew for certain what state my body was in was the moment I could potentially go into shock. And then it would all be over.

But either way, whether my life ends here or not, I lost.

I couldn't stop her. Izanagi wasn't strong enough. The moment she had set off that bomb it was all over. I stood no chance. Izanagi alone wouldn't be good enough – but more importantly I doubted that Yosuke or Chie would do much good against that move either –

She was playing me right into her hands. She was always capable of that tremendous amount of power and had just led me along –

What was she trying to tell me? She wasn't just toying with me. She hadn't used her full strength right from the start. There had to be some meaning to that.

But –

Did it even matter? It was all over. I wasn't going to get a second chance. And now that Yukiko had seen me fail with her own eyes she would be backed into that corner once again and it was probably only a matter of minutes before she put an end to everything herself.

So what was the point?

Honestly it didn't even matter to me if I made it out alive.

For the first time in years I'd given myself a purpose. To save the people who were trapped in this world. To save people that were being unjustly tortured for a crime that we're all guilty of. But I'd failed so miserably on my first attempt.

I've just got too much bigotry in my system. I've become too cynical and too jaded by the shit society's put me through to ever be anything more. I'm just someone who complains – I can't put anything into action. And this just proves it.

Of course I'm not allowed to admit to that.

No, that would be too easy. I can't leave things off like that. Because I'm obligated to some higher power not to.

Fuck it. Fuck all of it. If I can't save one person then I might as well just pull the plug right now. Because without this – I don't have a damn thing, do I?

And of course –

The moment I admit that, I notice the figure hunched over on the ground next to me, peering down at me –

And I manage to move my head enough to see them – it's that girl from the train station. The one with the weird clothes that she was still dressed in. The only real difference, aside from the massive book she held in her hands, was the rather concerned look on her face. What she was doing here… Fuck it, I don't need to be questioning any of this shit. If it happens, it happens, and I just have to accept it. There's no point in mulling shit over this late in the game, after all.

She finally realizes that I'm staring at her and suddenly fidgets.

"…Are you alright?" She asks, not really looking directly at me.

"…I'd imagine you can probably figure that out for yourself." I groan, my voice barely coming out of my mouth.

She doesn't seem to want to look directly at me at all. I could only imagine how broken my bones were. "…Right, I guess." She replies while clearly trying to hold something back. She likely didn't want to freak out over how banged up I was for my sake – it would seem that she was at least a little considerate. Wasn't a bad thing, I suppose.

"…Who are you?"

She finally looks into my eyes, and after several seconds of silence she replies.

"…Marie. I'm Marie. And… I want to help you."

And from that moment –

From that moment came something strange –

A feeling I wasn't quite familiar with.

…No, it wasn't love. I'm not some dewy-eyed school girl, you know.

But there was something about the simplicity of her words and the sincerity of them –

That made me feel as though I'd found a light in the darkness.

And so it begins again –