Firstly, I don't own The Walking Dead. All credit for this amazing show goes elsewhere. Sam and Dean are based on Supernatural, and unfortunately I don't own that either. Now I've gone and depressed myself.
This is a long fic only because I fell in love with the characters and I couldn't stop writing. I love feedback, but no pressure. I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it! If you do decide to give feedback or rating, please don't be cruel. I'm a big ol softie... Thanks!
Hope you like the beginnings of Shane's feeling developing here, and for the interactions between the group. I enjoyed feeling them out. And yes, I based the characters of Sam and Dean on Supernatural. It just seemed to fit somehow, but there is no storyline based on Supernaturals Sam and Dean's hunter lifestyles...
And since you've gotten this far, a review or two would rock my world! Thanks!
Trouble tapped on Ian's door and opened it slowly. He was coming out of the shower and had wrapped a towel around his waist. They weren't shy, by any means, with each other, but he did seem to swagger a little more with her there in his almost naked glory. He had a great body, no one could dispute that, and he would probably try to smack anybody who tried.
She closed the door behind herself and leaned against it. "Dinner's ready. You going out there like that?"
"Well, you know I could always-" He began but she cut him off.
"Go into your bathroom and throw something on?" She finished for him, eyebrow raised.
He conceded and disappeared into the bathroom, but she could hear him quite clearly. "You know, I could be asking why you didn't excuse yourself when you saw my state of attire if it offends you so much." His voice was heavy with suggestive sarcasm. Typical.
She groaned and fell back into one of his chairs. It was covered in his shirts and she was almost covered by them completely as they toppled over on her. "Last resort, my man. Last resort."
He poked his head out of the bathroom door, his face hurt. "Ouch."
"Why are you always like that, when you know I've got a lot on my mind? Like we're just going to go flying into bed at any moment because one of your carefully constructed statements just makes me all gooey or some shit?" She had rested her head back and was speaking to the ceiling.
"Is it really that bad?" He asked again, this time emerging fully dressed in a black button down shirt and dark jeans. His hair, as usual, picture perfectly mussed and his eyes that same intense blue that even she could say where remarkable. "Do I repel you so?"
"No." She grumbled, taking handfuls of his clothes and pushing them into her face. "I'm just... I dunno. Irritated."
"What? You? Irritated? Say it isn't so." He grinned and sat on the bed.
"Smart ass." She grinned at him, pushing the sleeves and collars away from her face. They smelled like him, cedar and sandlewoody sort of something. "You hungry?"
"Not really." His eyes darkened almost to black and she could see he was still feeling the loss of Tanner more than the rest of them.
"Me either. I just don't want to go out there, you know? But I shouldn't be putting this on you of all people. Come on, let's just go." She stood but he grabbed her hand and pulled her back.
"I can imagine there are certain things you could tell me that will piss me off. But I also know that you know you can tell me anything and I'm not going to lose it, or hate you, or cryyyyyy..." More sarcasm.
"Forget it, Ian. If there was ever a time, I think you just did it in." She said, her fingers intertangled with his absently. "I guess I just wanted to know that I never led you on. You put stuff out there but I've never gone on with it. Never gave you the expectation, so to speak?"
His brow furrowed and he let go of her hand, leaning back on the bed, hands under his head, his eyes on her. "Do you drive me crazy with those little outfits you wear? Yeah. Does it make me insane when you drag me in here after I've way too much to drink and strip me? Oh God, yeah. But do I think you do these, or any of the millions other things I haven't mentioned, on purpose? No. I do not think you are intentionally leading me on."
She sat down on the edge of his bed and gave a sigh of relief. "Good. I'm glad. I don't want to do that."
He leaned up to rest on his elbows. "What's got you so worked up, Trouble. Normally, you wouldn't give a shit what me, or anyone else is thinking about you. Is it losing Tanner?"
"Maybe a little. And I still don't care, by the way. It's just, there's this whole thing going on with the new group that's making me a little uncertain if the way I normally react to things will actually be the right thing to do now. And I know that makes completely no sense." She her hand over her face and sighed again.
"I've gotten to know you pretty well, right? And the extremely few times you have managed to actually speak gibberish and be sober means something's up. And since you're here, I can only fathom that you think I might be able to shed some of my classic Ian wisdom on the subject. So talk." He held up his hands suddenly. "And, please. Don't try to do this without just giving me the dignity of trying to pretend there's nothing there between you and Shane. I'm an adult. Just treat me like one, ok?"
She sat back and blanched at him, then threw herself forward into his arms in a bear hug that pinned him back to the bed. He laughed, wrapping his arms back around her.
"Thank you." She said sincerely, sitting back up, but keeping one of his hands in hers. "It just used to be so much simpler. It was just our little group here. We dealt with what went on, but I think we were happy. We were, right?"
"Well, in a context where the rest of the world is blowing up or trying to eat you, then yeah, I'd say pretty happy. But Tanner's death wasn't our fault. One of us was going to go sometime. And another one is going to after that. Sucky as that may be to admit."
"Then there was Shane, and you gotta admit, he's pretty good with the weapons, and the planning. He knows what he's doing."
At that, Ian gave a resentful frown. "Sure. Fine. He's good with the muscle."
"And now, all these people here, and I'm finding out shit I never expected in a million years." She looked overwhelmed and he threw an arm over her, pulling her close and resting his chin on her head.
"Like what?" He asked, flicking his eyes down at her hair. He wasn't sure she'd tell him.
"Doesn't matter. Not really. I told Rick earlier that we all did things now that we might not do before, you know, before everything. Survival is a wicked thing, isn't it?" She looked up at him, turning her mouth up a little.
He gave her a gentle smile. "You know I love you, right?"
"Ian," She started to pull away but he stopped her.
"No, that's not what I meant. I just mean I love you. Sam loves you. Dean, Anna, Warren." She stuck out her bottom lip a little and leaned back against him. She could see what he was trying to say. "You've always got us. Before Shane, before the rest of them, we had each other and that's not going to change. I won't let it, and truthfully, I don't think anyone of us would let it happen. You get me?"
He jostled her a little and she smiled. "That it's up to us to allow these people to bring some serious drama up in here?"
"Bingo. And what happens when people mess with you?" He was being encouraging.
"I maim. Murder. Dismember." She said flatly. He was right.
"And I've seen it. You remember that thug wannabe thing that got on our backs right as we were getting out?" She nodded. "Dude was a foot and half taller than you. Had, what, 75? 100? pounds on you? And what did you do when he got a little grabby?"
She grinned, her eyes on the ceiling. She was playing along because Ian was actually making her feel better. "Well, if I remember correctly, I detatched his balls from his body and left him a very imposing looking soprano."
"That's how I saw it. Girl, you can take care of yourself. All I'm sayin is that Dean, me, Sam, and Tanner would have been all over that guy but you took care of it before we could even reach you. You got back here, babe. Don't forget that. Somebody comes at you wrong, might be interesting to let us get a word in once in a while, that's all. Let's at least pretend we're guys, here. It's kinda emasculating."
She laughed, jabbing him in the stomach. "Oh yeah? Ok, you got a deal, Ian. I'll let you take the next one. I'll be happy to."
He was immediately concerned. "Uh-oh. What's comin'? What did I just get myself into?"
She shrugged devilishly. "Not much. Just a very pissed pregnant woman with enough issues to take a small army. At least, I'm pretty sure that's what you just volunteered for."
He pulled his arm away. "Huh-uh. That one's all yours."
"Can't do that. It's been said and promised." She grinned.
Ian cocked his head. "What's she so pissed about? Aren't we kind of saving her family's life here?"
"Nah, that would open too many cans there, Ian. You'll find out anyway. Doesn't matter if I don't say anything." She shook her head.
"Ooooh, I see. Let Ian comfort you when you're feeling like crap and then leave him hanging." She looked back at his words sadly and he re adjusted his tone. "You know what? I know what we're gonna do. You'll like it. Come on." He grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the door. She started to protest but he shushed his lips, putting his finger there and opened the door. He darted his head out to see if the coast was clear. He kept her close behind him as they inched along the wall past the kitchen and to the elevator.
"Why are we going up?" She whispered and he smiled mischievously.
"You'll see."
And she did. If the thunderstorm the night the new group had come in was a bad one this one was twice as bad, at least, and it was magnificent. Even the thunder echoed louder than it ever had before. The lower security lights gave it a beautiful backdrop, with the brilliant lightening splashing the walls in violent bursts of light.
"Oh, Ian..." She said in wonder, stepping out into the middle of the room. He came to stand beside her, looking up at the wide windows above.
"I had a feeling it was gonna be a good one. Come on." He led her up the stairs to the balcony, and she watched him grab a blanket from the wall and throw it on the ground. They took prime seats to take in the sights, and she pulled a pack of cigarettes from her pocket. Pulling one out and lighting it, she automatically passed it to him. She knew him well enough to know there was no getting past that one.
"This is great, Ian." She grinned, taking a drag of the cigarette he passed back. He leaned back and watched her admire the sky, the look of excitement on her face better payment than any words. Still, there was one question he had to know, and he had to ask it.
"So why is preggo chick crampin' our style?" He murmured, keeping his voice low. He knew they could be heard up here if anyone was listening. "And what does it have to do with Shane?"
She looked at him, seemingly lost for the right words, so he attempted to help further. "I meant what I said down there. I'm going to be jealous, I am. Can't help that. But I can also adjust the asshole attitude if it means making you happy."
She smiled at him then, the smile he always wished she'd give to him. He leaned over and buried her head in his chest, breathing his clean scent in deeply. He was way more to her than she ever wanted to admit, even if she couldn't say she was 'in love' with him.
"Do you love him back?" He asked, his mouth close to her ear.
"I don't know. I really wish I did. But I do feel a certain need for violence when she snaps at him, or even at Rick. Chick is screwed up, Ian. I think she wants 'em both. I don't like seeing people hurt like that, just for the hell of it."
He nodded understandingly, looking out at the storm.
"That's why it had to be you who I talked to about this, you know." She continued, her cheek still against his chest. "I had to know if I'm doing the same thing to you that she's doing to them. Am I?"
"No." He said firmly, and he meant it. "Even as pissed as I can get, as mad as I've ever been, you've never put anything out there to make me think that. You are honest. Annoying and sexy as hell, but honest."
She chuckled at that, watching the storm. They fell into a comfortable silence, letting the darkness in the room cover them and quiet their thoughts.
Shane was getting frustrated. Trouble had been gone a long time, longer than he had experienced since he'd come here, and Ian was with her. Their absence was wildly acute at the dinner table. Lori had also declined to join, but Anna had taken her a plate. There was the usual chatter at the table, but once when he went to get up, Sam shot him a look that made him think maybe it wasn't the best idea. He couldn't help but feel like he was losing Trouble, because of all this shit.
Rick, as well, was feeling Trouble's absence. Lori, he could deal with, surprisingly. Her vicious glares and snipes at him had taken their toll. If Shane was still interested in her, Rick could almost fathom giving him his blessing. Take my wife, please?, Right? But Trouble... Rick was feeling like he was shoving her out of her element with all this drama, and she was going to shove back. It wouldn't be pretty if she did.
After dinner, Rick tried to quell his disturbing thoughts by spending some time with Carl. They actually ended up in the bedroom Lori was hiding in, and for a little while, it was almost normal. She had changed somehow since her conversation with Shane. Was she more accepting of Rick's presence? He didn't know, but it felt a little like relief. When Sam had asked if the three of them would like to watch a movie upstairs, Rick declined for the three of them politely, saying they were tired. Lori actually gave a small smile that he didn't miss.
Shane was another matter entirely. He was almost a mess. He would have been in their bedroom, but it didn't feel right. He wanted to see her when she returned. How she behaved. He sat anxiously in a chair in the common room with Sam and Dean, and T-Dog, the others having kept to their rooms for the evening. The movie played, but he paid no attention, his eyes darting to the elevator frequently. Even Dean seemed to notice, and gave a small cough when he saw Shane do it for the hundredth time. After that, Shane tried to settle down. What was going to happen now was going to happen, that was it. Breathe...
Ding! He almost left his seat, but his nails in the fabric of the chair kept him down. Ian and Trouble came in nonchalantly.
"Oh! Police Academy. Love this one." Ian said casually, grabbing a handful of the popcorn in the bowl on the table and flopping down in a chair. His face was a virtual delight of the obvious state of Shane's distress, and he couldn't help but enjoy that just a little.
Trouble rolled her eyes, smiling softly. "Did Anna leave anything from dinner?" She asked Shane pointedly.
"Uh, yeah. Saved you something, I think." She led the way into the kitchen and out of everyone's earshot.
"You were gone so long, I thought something was wrong." He said, watching her pull a plate of cheese from the fridge and sitting it on the counter.
"Oh, big storm up there. It was great. Shoulda seen it." She said with Ian's careful control and obliviousness.
"Trouble." Shane was getting a little angry. He had no right to, but he was. "What's up?"
She considered him a moment, and put the bite of food down. "What's up is that I've been thinking about a lot of things and I needed some time to deal with it."
"And Ian helped you do that?" He asked reluctantly.
"Yup." She nodded. "I was thinking about something I told Rick. That since things changed, people do things they might not normally even consider. Like you with Lori." She watched his face fall, and she knew it was because he thought she was leading up to saying that he was one of those things to her. She wasn't enjoying his discomfort, but she needed to know this was serious.
"What are you thinkin' now?" He couldn't help but ask.
She came around the counter and stood right in front of him, putting her hands on his forearms. He was clearly confused. "I had to ask Ian if I was doing the same thing to him that Lori is doing to you and Rick. I needed to know if I'd changed, too. And he told me no. He told me that I'd always been honest with him about not feeling the way he felt about me." She threaded her arms through his and encircled his waist, looking up at him with wide green eyes. "So, that means that I can be honest with you too."
He couldn't feel his heart beat. She was confusing him to the point of fraction. "And?"
She reached up and kissed him deeply, putting her hand on the back of his neck and pulling him to her. He responded ferverently, hugging her close to his body. "And..." She whispered close to his ear. "I love you too."
He physically picked her up and swung her around and she tried to keep a squeal from thrusting from her throat. All the worry, the trepidation, the fear, was gone and he felt insane with relief. And lust. Lust bubbled up from the bottom of his feet straight through to the top of his head. He squeezed and caressed her as they kissed, her feet still not on the ground. She slowed him gently, and he lowered her.
"So here's how this is going to work, ok?" She leaned back and looked him in the eye. He nodded, waiting for her to continue. "We're not going all The Hills Are Alive With The Sound of Music, here. But we don't hide either. Keep Ian's feelings in mind, ok? It wasn't easy for him to say the things he said, and I'm not going to hurt him if I can help it."
He released her and nodded again, almost obediently. He would do anything she asked.
"Lori and Rick are going to have to deal with their problems, because as far as I'm concerned, this is a new place, they are guests here, and you have removed yourself from the situation. You have removed yourself, haven't you?" She eyed him.
"Completely." He said softly.
"Ok. Guess we just have to start with that." She flicked her eyebrows up in a suggestive manner, and he melted. They tried to get back to the bedroom in an nonchalant manner but when Sam started to chuckle, they just banked it, tearing clothes off each other the moment the door was closed. They landed in a pile of writhing arms and legs on the bed, laughing lightly and groaning here and there. When he finally entered her, the world went away.