Quintessence of Life: Fight for Peace

by Athenais Penelope Clemence

Having been officially declared dead but having survived his grave wound, Robin returns to England only to discover that King Richard disappeared on the way from Acre. No longer enemies, Robin and Guy fight against Prince John and the Black Knights as brothers-in-arms, assisted by Archer and others. This is part three of the long epic (trilogy).

14. Chapter 13 Drama in Aquitaine

Chapter 13

Drama in Aquitaine

With Queen Eleanor's return to Poitiers, the previously quiet royal court blossomed in all the colors of a rainbow; there were numerous lavish feasts, banquets, and other entertainments arranged in Eleanor's honor. There were also private evenings in the queen's chambers in the Maubergeonne Tower.

Queen Eleanor ordered a grand banquet in the stunningly beautiful great hall, known as La Salle des Pas Perdus, the "hall of lost footsteps" as a footfall was silenced by the vastness of the chamber. Tonight's festivities were anticipated to be grander than other feasts organized since the queen's return. It was the last day of the summer today, and the Queen Mother wished to celebrate the change of seasons lavishly.

Tonight La Salle des Pas Perdus was absolutely majestic. Everything in the great hall shone in magnificent splendor. The walls were draped with expensive tapestries depicting forest strolls, summer hunts, ancient mythological scenes, and outdoor festivities. The walls were also adorned with flowers – laurels, white lilies, and red roses. There were also statues of Orpheus and Arion smiting their lyres.

The courtiers crowded around three long tables that were set together to form a great U-shape and were covered with a white damask tablecloth and numerous silver candelabras. The hall was illuminated by many blazing candles and burning torches hanging on the walls. Every table was laden with a tremendous orgy of food: meat, oysters, veal, venison, fish, poultry, cheeses, bowls overflowing with some exotic fruits, jellies and nuts, and many other delicacies. The scent of food and flowers mingled with the perfumed air created an intoxicating air that filled their veins with life.

Robin shifted in his high-back chair in an attempt to find a more comfortable position. He wore an expression of feigned serenity since the beginning of the banquet. Everyone thought that Robin looked dashing in his trendy blue velvet doublet with black slashing and a V-shaped jeweled collar, in his black brocade shirt and his matching trousers; a jeweled belt glimmered faintly in the orange candlelight.

As a guest of honor at Queen Eleanor's court, Robin occupied a privileged place at the table, sitting to the right from Queen Eleanor; his beautiful wife sat next to him. Robin, Eleanor, and Melisende sat at the central table in the grand hall, surrounded by statues of ancient Greek Gods, in the part of the hall which was most lavishly adorned with flowers. Sitting to the left from Eleanor, Megan, the queen's favorite lady-in-waiting, glowed with happiness as she finally joined the entourage of her beloved Queen Mother.

Queen Eleanor was surrounded by her ladies-in-waiting, as well as by the king's most loyal noblemen, including Robert de Beaumont, Roger de Lacy, Carter Leighton of Stretton, Hugh de Neville, and several other nobles, many of whom had accompanied King Richard on the Third Crusade. Marian, Guy, and Allan were given places at the distant table; Robin could barely see them in the overcrowded chamber.

Eleanor of Aquitaine slowly rose to her feet, sweeping her eyes over the banqueting hall. All the courtiers stood up; men bowed to the Queen Mother and ladies sank into deep curtsies. Everyone stared in reverence at the most legendary, powerful, and notorious woman in Christendom. The queen looked regal and gorgeous in her red brocade gown with a square-cut neckline and ample sleeves trimmed with sable; her head was adorned with a stunning coronet of diamonds, sapphires, and rubies.

Queen Eleanor ran her eyes across the room. "My friends, this feast is devoted to the celebration of the coming autumn," she proclaimed in Norman–French. "Enjoy the festivities at our court!"

The guests again bowed deeply to the queen; ladies sank into curtsies. Eleanor smiled at the lords and ladies, and dismissed them from their bows with an imperative wave of her hand.

Eleanor eyed the chamber quickly. With her gaze focusing on Robin's face, she continued in a high voice, "We have news about King Richard! We are continuing our negotiations about our liege's release, and soon the ransom will be paid. Hopefully, our king will return to England by the end of the year."

Euphoric cries filled the chamber. In contrast to Prince John's court in London, every courtier in Aquitaine was loyal to Queen Eleanor and King Richard. Everyone impatiently waited for the return of the beloved heroic Lionheart who had been taken prisoner against all international laws. Nevertheless, Eleanor knew that there could be John's spies at the court, probably even in her closest entourage, and she became particularly cautious in the past days, trusting only Melisende, Robin, and Richard's favorites.

Robin's marriage to Melisende calmed the nerves of many nobles who had been displeased with the Lionheart's long absence in England and had teetered on the brink of betraying their liege. Moreover, almost everyone knew that Vaisey, one of Prince John's most loyal followers, was responsible for several regicide attempts and for almost murdering Robin in Imuiz; although no one publicly accused John of treason, everyone knew or suspected the truth, which deprived John of the support of all the Poitevin lords.

The Queen Mother seated herself in a luxurious high-back chair. Then she waved her hand at the courtiers, signaling a moment of silence. "As usual, Sir Robin of Locksley, the Earl of Huntingdon and Count de Bordeaux, is a guest of honor tonight."

All eyes were riveted on Robin, and the couriers cheered and hailed the hero. Yet, his popularity only irritated Robin who didn't enjoy all that admiration at all. But after his supposed death in the Holy Land, he became a legend in his own time in Aquitaine and in the south of the Angevin Empire.

"It will be alright, Robin," Carter soothed, looking at Robin from across the table.

Roger de Lacy smiled. "Robin, don't pay attention to them. Let them stare at you if they wish."

A forlorn Robin met the gazes of his friends in turns. "Thank you," he uttered finally. His friends understood that he didn't need fame anymore, and he was grateful for that.

Robin veered his gaze to Melisende. He smiled as his eyes took in his wife's appearance – she was attired in a majestic gold and silver brocade gown that was tastefully cut in a low-neck style, its bodice embroidered with sapphires, diamonds, and pearls. Her long red-gold hair cascaded down her back in thick waves, and he wished to move his hands through them so he could push it over her shoulder and view her delicate neck.

"Robin, how are you doing? Are you enjoying the evening?" Melisende asked with concern.

Robin was gazing thoughtfully at his wife for some time before replying. "Melisende, you know that I prefer not to be here tonight." He offered her a bleak smile. "I want to retire soon."

"Robin, please listen to me," she addressed her husband in a caressing voice. "You loved Much, and he loved you. I didn't know Much for a long time, but I share your grief. It will take much time for you to reconcile yourself with the loss of your best friend. But you will cope!"

Robin's eyes reflected the pain that blossomed inside him. He grabbed a goblet of wine and took a huge swig, hoping that the wine would help him relax a little bit. "I am trying to forget, but it is too difficult."

Melisende tilted her head to one side. "Robin, you shouldn't be ashamed to show your grief. Tears shed for your departed loved ones are not a sign of weakness – they are a symbol of a pure heart."

Robin smiled plaintively. "Emotions…" he uttered after a moment's silence, trying to keep his quiet voice from breaking. "Living without feeling anything is the same as not living at all. And yet, sometimes having no emotions is a better way of life." His voice was bitter.

She underscored, "Emotions make you human!"

"There is something important I want to say," he spoke in a livelier manner. "Melisende, there is no woman who understands me better than you do."

There was a beatific smile on the face of the king's cousin. "You are exaggerating, Robin."

Queen Eleanor smiled with a splendid smile as she observed Robin and Melisende. She was immensely pleased that the marriage she had arranged for Robin turned out to be a marriage for love.

Megan, who had been talking with another lady-in-waiting a few moments before, flicked her gaze to Robin. "Please accept my most sincere condolences on your friend's death, Robin."

"I appreciate your kind words, Meg," Robin responded with gratitude.

Megan's visage was tinged with sympathy for Robin's obvious pain. "If someone doesn't wear their heart on their sleeve, emotions are still churning in them," she said rhetorically. "I know that it is your case, Robin. But please don't feel embarrassed to ask for help if you need it."

Robin continued staring at Megan in startled amazement. "Thank you, Meg."

Melisende took Robin's hand in hers and squeezed it. "We will support you, Robin."

When Megan began to converse with the queen, Robin gave his wife a smolderingly gorgeous half-smile accompanied with a flirty wink. "I have a great idea that would entice you into leaving the banquet."

In response, Melisende flashed a sweet, tranquil smile. "And what is it, husband?"

Faint mockery laced his voice as he returned, "Do you have a guess, wife?"

"Maybe this will help you understand." He leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek to let her understand what was on his mind. "What do you feel, my love? Does the flame in your heart portend to a huge conflagration?"

She snorted. "Well, your seduction techniques leave a lot to be desired, Robin. They have become old-fashioned and predictable, and I am beginning to grow tired of them."

Robin squeezed her fingers and kissed her palm. "Are you?" he teased.

"Sure. I am as tired as the wings of an old bird," she affirmed with biting sarcasm.

"My intentions will reenergize you and make you feel younger," he remarked with a derisive grin.

She made a face. "No, they won't!"

"What a pity!" His voice dropped to a low rumble. He smiled brilliantly, even though it was a shadow of his old cheeky grin. "I would love to pride myself on knowing that I can accomplish so much!"

Melisende went very still as she pondered her reply. With wide violet eyes, she innocently glanced up at him, lowering her voice to a confidential whisper, "Is it so obvious that your charms are working?"

He jested, "Yes, my lady! My charm is one of my greatest assets!"

As Robin took her hands in his, Melisende laughed with a melodic laughter, and Robin laughed back. For a short moment, they felt as if the whole world were filled with lightness.

Gazing into his wife's eyes, Robin thought that he knew for certain what every different shade of her beguiling eyes meant when they were aglow. He felt his loins swell with desire at the glorious images of the night forming in his mind. "Melisende, there is no more beautiful woman than you are," he murmured.

"I am very happy when you say this, Robin," his wife replied with a satisfied smile.

"I don't deserve to have such a great wife." Robin drew a hand through his sandy hair that freely fell over his ears and his right brow. "I don't deserve you, my love."

"Robin, you are right that you don't deserve Lady Melisende," Megan interjected with a playful smile.

Melisende frowned, but the corners of her lips were quivering in a smile. "Why is that so, Meg?"

Megan grinned, sipping wine from her goblet. "It is because nobody deserves you, Lady Melisende, like nobody deserves our most beloved Queen Eleanor!"

Robin smirked humorously. "Oh, Meg!"

Queen Eleanor swung her gaze to Megan. There was a large smile on her face as she exclaimed, "Oh, my dear Megan, you are flattering me!" Her eyes darted between Melisende and Megan. "Do you know someone who likes being old?" She laughed quietly. "In youth, we enjoy life; when we grow old, we get tired of life and want to meet the Lord. Hardest of all, as people become older and more sapient, is that they need to accept that they get weaker and no longer appreciate the beauty of life; but they cannot turn time back."

"Your Grace, you are wrong!" Megan protested. "You are a great woman! You will always be unique!"

Melisende sipped wine from the goblet that had just been refilled by a servant. "The good thing about being old is that you don't have to endure the consequences of youthful follies!"

"Amicia would say something like this," Megan noted, her mind drifting back to her friend who continued spying for King Richard at Prince John's court.

Melisende dipped her head in agreement. "Yes, she would."

Robin looked down at the table; on his platter, there was only a small piece of venison left. "It is our inner world that makes us young or old." He raised his eyes to the Queen Mother.

Eleanor's face lit up with an impish smile. "The secret of eternal youth is to carry the spirit of the child within yourself into old age, which means that you will never lose your enthusiasm and hope."

They all laughed blithesomely for the first time tonight.

Megan's eyes danced with excitement. "Well, you will always be a big child, Robin?"

"There is a child living inside of me even now, in spite of all the changes in me," Robin answered as he sipped wine. "Youth is a gift of nature, but it can also be a source of many problems."

Eleanor smiled at Robin affectionately. "You are right, Robin. An impetuous and turbulent youth is the evidence of a dynamic and energetic personality."

Realizing that the queen was reminiscing about her own youth, Melisende and Megan nodded at her.

"Yeah, take my rebellious spirit," Robin began; a ghost of a grin tugged at the corner of his mouth. "It created many problems for King Richard when we were in the Holy Land. My missions were usually successful, but our liege always cautioned me against being reckless; however, I didn't react, which is why the king instructed others to protect me from my own foolhardiness and recklessness."

"I believe that Robin disregarded Richard's orders more too often," Melisende retorted with a mischievous grin. "We will never be able to learn how many times he contravened Richard's orders."

Megan regarded Robin sympathetically. The mere thought of the slaughter witnessed and committed by Robin in the land of Jesus Christ was evoking a visceral fear in her heart. With an inward sigh, she said, "I have never been in the Holy Land, but I heard the same."

Eleanor smiled at her youngest son proudly. "Robin, your bravery and compassion made you who you are now," she claimed, her throat tightened with emotion. "There is nobody like you. You are the greatest hero of England, Hero of Acre, and the savior of the king and the nation." She let her gaze roam about the room and then glanced back at Robin. "Who of all these lords can boast that he is better than you?"

A confident Melisende cried out, "Nobody!"

"Nobody or very few," Megan agreed.

Robin sighed. "At times, I wonder whether most of my deeds were just or unjust."

The queen began a philosophical speech that was spoken in a sarcastic undertone. "What makes my old age sad is not that we, old people, have few sources of joy, but that we don't have sources of hope." She smiled contently as she glanced over Robin, Melisende, and Megan in turn. "But when I look at such young creatures, like the three of you, I always think that England will most definitely have a bright future."

Robin's chest heaved with sadness. "God determines our destiny, and we cannot change it."

Queen Eleanor, Megan, and Melisende shared uneasy glances. Death made Robin quite philosophical and a little fatalistic, and they all hoped that he wouldn't lose the most important remnants of his old self – his ability to inspire everyone and to give hope for a better future.

Leaning back against his seat, Robin swept his eyes over the banqueting hall. He was still despondent as he was mourning for Much, but his stay at the court improved his mood. He reveled in the atmosphere of the Poitevin energetic, passionate, rebellious, fierce, musical, and sensitive aura. When he compared the southern people with the English people, it occurred to him that the English were less passionate, less artistic, and conservative. Now Robin understood why he was always fond of the people from Aquitaine – he was one of them as Queen Eleanor's son.

Eleanor raised her hand, signaling for silence. "And now our great Comtessa de Dia will sing to her beloved Raimbaut of Orange," she declared, looking at Melisende.

Waves of excitement washed over the guests. All eyes were now glued to Robin's wife. It had long become a tradition at the court of love for Melisende to sing love songs composed by Comtessa de Dia, an illustrious female troubadour who was in love with and sang about Raimbaut of Orange. Melisende often gave solo performances in front of the courtiers.

Smiling vividly, Melisende was looking into Robin's eyes, and he was staring devotedly into hers, their fingers entwined. As the Queen Mother nodded, she began to sing in Occitan. It was the song "Estat ai en greu cossirier" ("I've been in great distress of mind").

Estat ai en greu cossirier

Per un cavallier q'ai agut,

E vuoil sia totz temps saubut

Cum eu l'ai amat a sobrier ;

Ara vei q'ieu sui trahida

Car eu non li donei m'amor,

Don ai estat en gran error

En lieig e qand sui vestida.

"Of late I've been in great distress about a knight I thought was mine. I want it known for all of time that though I loved him to excess, his pleasure with me I delayed, and was on that account betrayed! It makes me wild: my mind can't rest whether I'm in bed or dressed." Robin submerged into an ocean of sheer delight; his countenance was lit up with joy. His wife sang very well, her voice sweet and strong. The song was about the lady who agonized over the lack of the knight's affection for her; that reminded Robin of his relationship with Marian, although he still loved his former betrothed.

Ben volria mon cavallier

Tener un ser e mos bratz nut,

Q'el s'en tengra per ereubut

Sol q'a lui fezes cosseillier.

Car plus m'en sui abellida

No fetz Floris de Blanchaflor,

Eu l'autrei mon cor e m'amor,

Mon sen, mos huoills, a ma vida.

It seemed that Melisende was talking to Robin as her desperate plea for the knight's love tumbled from her lips. For a brief moment, his expression was unadorned by his usual cheekiness, and guilt radiated from him like heat from a furnace. Then Robin schooled his features into impassiveness. He winked at her, his eyes twinkling, and she winked back at him. Melisende wasn't heartbroken: her love wasn't unrequited, even though she loved him more than Robin loved her.

Ben volria mon cavallier

tener un ser en mos bratz nut,

qu'el s'en tengra per ereubut

sol qu'a lui fezes cosseillier;

car plus m'en sui abellida

no fetz Floris de Blanchaflor:

ieu l'autrei mon cor e m'amor

mon sen, mos huoillis e ma vida.

"I'd like it well if I caressed him with my naked arms. He'd get excited if I merely let him feel the softness of my breast; and he'd delight me even more than Floris once did Blanchaflor! I'd offer him my every part, my mind, my senses, and my heart." As Melisende was started singing another verse, Robin's body tingled with vehement passion as a primal desire for her overwhelmed him. He saw that she was also burning for him, and her singular focus was him at the moment.

Bels amics avinens e bos,

Cora us tenrai e mon poder?

E que jagues ab vos un ser

E qe us des un bais amoros !

Sapchatz gran talan n'auria

Qe us tengues en luoc del marit,

Ab so que m'aguessetz plevit

De far tot so qu'eu volria.

Melisende's eyes brightened when she realized what Robin was thinking about. His eyes darkened with passion, and his lips were curved in a sensual smile. Her breath caught in her throat, and she swallowed hard; the pulse at the base of her throat began to throb. The last verse made them ache with need for each other. "When, my gallant handsome friend, when shall I have you in my power? I'll lie beside you and my tender kiss will bring your love to flower. I would be greatly comforted to have you in my husband's stead, but only if you swear to do everything I wish you to!"

Melisende lapsed into silence. There was that enchanting smile on her face that always drove men mad with desire, but it was a smile only for her beloved husband.

The song was over. Loud applause followed, and the ebullient guests praised Melisende's talent.

Robin and Melisende were lost in the beauty of the moment. She looked into his eyes that were full of unrestrained passion; her own eyes mirrored his hunger. Only God knew how long they were staring at each other like that. It might have been a few minutes or hours; but, to them, it was forever.

A smile pulled at the corners of Robin's mouth. "I love you," he whispered.

Melisende wet her lips with the tip of her tongue. "I love you, too," she answered.

Robin brushed a tendril of red-gold hair from her cheek. "I read somewhere that souls are like flowers. Your soul is like the most gorgeous violet in the world."

"I love violets, and I love the violet color." Her voice was barely a whisper.

"I know," he breathed. "The color becomes you, my love."

§§§

Nibbling some food and slowly drinking wine, Guy sat close to Marian, Allan, and Archer in a quiet contemplation. They spent the evening talking about trifles; none of them dared touch on a serious topic, trying to relax. They interrupted their conversation only during interludes when the servants came to their table with trays full of delicious meal and rare delicacies and when Melisende had been singing.

A tired Guy wanted to leave, but he couldn't. He didn't sleep well in the past three months they had spent in Poitiers. In his dreams, he was always haunted by a feeling of withering loneliness and by terrifying memories of the past. When he awoke in a cold sweat and sat upright in bed, a lingering sadness pervaded his entire being, and he plunged into ebony darkness. Guy was yearning for Megan because only she could give him a sense of peace and calm, comfort and hope, alleviating his fears and anxieties. His relationship with Megan was a pivotal part of his life, but they were not close as she kept him at arm's length.

Allan broke the silence. "Lady Melisende has a voice of an angel."

"Her voice is fabulous," Guy assented. "I didn't expect that Robin's wife can sing so well."

Marian gave a nod. "Her voice is mesmerizing."

Archer heaved a sigh. Sadness encased him as Melisende's image entered his mind. "Lady Melisende reminds me of a dangerous and beautiful siren who lures men to her island with her enchanting singing. I admire her, for she is a one-of-a-kind woman, but there is something… fatal about her."

Marian smiled deplorably as she mulled over that. "I have a similar sensation," she uttered at last. Guy was not thinking of the banquet. He was exasperated when loud laughter filled the chamber as a new entertainment was provided for the guests: dressed like nymphs, several women appeared in the great hall and began to dance. As now there were not only Poitevin nobles but also English lords and ladies at the court, Queen Eleanor arranged English music and dance to entertain them; troubadours' performance was scheduled for a later time. Applause and laughter followed the end of every song, but Guy looked sullen. When one of the singers finished singing in English and made an imposing bow, riotous applause mingled with shouts of laughter; Guy was one of the very few people who didn't laugh at all.

Guy took a goblet of wine from a tray carried by a passing servant. As if the alcohol could relieve him from anxieties, he emptied the goblet and then asked to refill it. He drained the contents, feeling a little better; then Marian scolded him, saying that he shouldn't drink more.

Guy intercepted heated glances of many young ladies; they smiled and winked at him, but he didn't react. Today was the first time in many years when he didn't wear black leather: he was dressed in a white doublet with a low collar, a blue brocade shirt, and white trousers; his clothes were designed in the latest Poitevin fashion but not adorned with any jewels, like it was popular in Aquitaine. When he wasn't clad in black leather, he didn't look as dangerous as he had looked during his service to Vaisey; now he looked handsome, and there was a fine combination of manliness, strictness, and sternness in his features.

Marian grasped Guy's hand and gave it a shake. "Guy, are you alright?" she questioned.

Guy flicked his gaze to Marian and flashed a smile imbued with melancholy. There was a moment's pause between them as the heat from her skin scorched his just, and it felt like they had been shocked to have a simple physical contact again. Yet, as they looked into each other's eyes, they didn't see a sizzling flame of passion. Instead, they saw softness that was like the touch of some scented southern wind. Marian and Guy instinctively felt that only a feeling of friendly affection was in their hearts; there was no love between them.

Marian took her hand away. "So?"

Guy blew a sigh of frustration. "You know that I don't like the court."

Marian easily gauged his thoughts. "Are you remembering your mother?"

He sighed again. "Always," he confirmed. "Do you love Queen Eleanor's court, Marian?"

It occurred to Marian that the people of England continued suffering as the ransom for the king's release was still being collected. They were not there to feed and protect the poor! Marian's guilt spiked through her chest like a series of tiny fevers. Anger at the king and herself coiled in her like a viper ready to strike, and it exploded in hissing words in an instant. "I am afraid I don't like it. Now I cannot to fight for the poor and justice, and instead I must spend my time at festivities." She paused and sucked in her breath. "Great!" she ground out sarcastically. "And, on top of that, we have the possibility that the king's won't be released this year..." She stopped abruptly as she noticed several courtiers, who were surreptitiously watching her, frown at her. "I am sorry," she added and cast her eyes down.

"Marian," Guy grunted as he glanced around and then stared fixedly at her. "Speak more quietly," he demanded. Archer and Allan nodded at Guy in agreement, not pleased that she had blurted out that.

Marian fidgeted her fingers together. "What if…" she began worriedly. "Have they heard everything?"

Archer interposed, "They are seating quite far from us. They are hardly able to eavesdrop."

As Archer turned his head to Allan, they began to converse in a low voice. For some time, Marian and Guy remained still, as if they didn't want to extend the talk further.

Marian spoke finally when the silence became unbearable. "Guy, I understand what you feel."

Guy was still exasperated at her shortsightedness. "Marian, we must be cautious," he reminded her, anxiety making his voice stern. "As we cannot return to England now, we should just wait here." He leaned closer to her and whispered into her ear, "Please think what you say, for the queen has spies everywhere."

As he drew back, his lips stretched into a grin; Marian managed a strained smile. "It was improvident of me to think aloud about such things."

"Indeed," he muttered.

She took a bite of fish on her platter. "Yes, we must obey the Queen Mother."

In the next moment, Archer and Allan stopped talking; Archer turned to Guy and Marian.

"When was the first time you were at court, Guy?" Archer asked his half-brother curiously.

Guy's mood deflated. "Vaisey once took me to Prince Richard's court in Poitiers, when Queen Eleanor was still imprisoned. It was many years ago, and we happened to be here just for several hours."

"Again Vaisey…" Marian grouched.

In the short silence that followed, Guy was slowly sipping wine, savoring its taste. "Well, this is not what I like to think about." He lost appetite after remembering Vaisey.

Allan's lips curved in a small smile. "It is a great pity that we are not sitting close to Robin." He finished eating a piece of venison, and now there was nothing left on his platter. "I miss Meg too; she has been distant from us as of late. Meg and Robin are two most sharp-witted people I have ever met."

Archer nibbled an apple that he had just taken from a bowl. "Allan, you have forgotten me – I am as dryly humorous as Robin is. I enjoy Meg's sense of wit a lot too."

A tiny smile played around Guy's lips. "Meg is an interesting and good girl."

Marian assessed Guy thoughtfully. "Then you should have taken a place next to Queen Eleanor."

During the months spent in Aquitaine, Marian became cognizant of Guy's interest in Megan. The more she observed Guy, the more convinced she was that he was profoundly attracted to Megan. She noticed Guy's eyes flickering between Megan and her, as if he were mentally comparing her with the queen's confidante. She wasn't foolish enough to ignore Guy's apparently growing attraction to Megan. She suspected that Guy was torn between Megan and herself for quite some time, and that didn't hurt her at all.

Guy looked at Marian in a strange way; then he sighed. "I wasn't invited there."

Marian let out a wry smile. "Maybe you wanted to be there?"

"Why are you saying this?" Guy needed to know.

Marian canted her head and said perceptively, "You know what I think. And I am not angry at you."

"Marian, we will have to talk later," Guy said flatly, trying to keep his voice steady. He had to inform her about King Richard's intention to marry him off to Megan, and he dreaded this upcoming moment.

A deep frown creased her forehead. "Has something bad happened?"

Guy glanced away. "Nothing. We just have to talk."

Marian knew what he had implied. "Of course, Guy." Guy didn't know that Queen Eleanor had already informed her about Richard's decision, and she accepted it.

An interlude during the banquet followed; more food and drinks were served. The feast was magnificent, and everyone was in an exultant mood, talking enthusiastically and zanily about the king's return. Some of the guests walked out of the banqueting hall so that they could engage in licentious behavior in one of the many dark alcoves in the palace, returning later and maintaining an outer façade of morality, despite their inner morass of indecency.

An ecstatic Allan exclaimed, "The feast is so splendid! I would love to stay here forever!"

Marian smiled at Allan, pleased that at least one of them was happy and enjoyed the entertainments at the luxurious court. Allan regretted that he hadn't taken Kate with him to Poitiers.

"Yes, the feast is great," Marian agreed, her expression somber.

Archer slammed a half-empty goblet at the table. "Once I visited Prince John's court in London. It seems that banquets at Queen Eleanor's court are more lavish and opulent than at John's!"

Guy directed at Allan a scornful glare. "Allan, you will never change. Even though your nobility and the lands of your family were reinstated to you, but it hasn't made you a serious man."

Marian smiled, her eyes darting towards Allan and then back to Guy. "Guy, don't be so strict to Allan."

"I am just being fair," Guy objected.

"Hey, Guy, let me enjoy a good life tonight," Allan supplied as he drank wine slowly. "We saved the Queen Mother from Pontefract! King Richard is coming home soon!"

Marian sighed discontentedly. "Not everything is fine."

A dark shadow crossed Guy's face. "I don't think that Robin agrees with you, Allan," he parried, sipping wine and looking around. "He is too affected by Much's death."

Archer emitted a heavy sigh. "Robin and Much were more brothers than I would ever be to him."

"Robin's wound will never heal," Marian commented. She knew that Robin was suffering more than she did, fearing to imagine how much pain he was hiding.

"If you believe that I am not grieving, you are wrong," Allan snapped indignantly. Displeasure registered on his face. "I grew to love Much while we lived in Sherwood."

Marian tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. "Allan, we know that you are in mourning. We all loved Much, and now we hate Vaisey more than ever." Her expression was pained, but her voice was steady. "But none of you can imagine what Robin and I are feeling."

Guy spoke compassionately. "You were Much's friend since childhood."

Marian nodded as her gaze slid to Guy. "Yes."

Guy's eyes flashed like those of a demon as rage coursed through him, and he clenched his fists. "You are right. Much loathed me and didn't consider me one of Robin's comrades, but now I hate Vaisey more than ever: he took the life of another innocent man who died because Robin, you, and I were trapped."

"Robin has the same thoughts, Guy," Archer pointed out.

Allan leaned back in his chair. "Much died for England, for King Richard, and for Queen Eleanor. But he was more loyal to Robin and died for Robin Hood." He let out a low growl. "Vaisey must pay for all his evil deeds after the king's return. On that day, justice will be served."

Marian shook her head. "I often doubt that there is justice."

"I started doubting it a long time ago," Guy confessed in a pessimistic tone.

"Cheer up!" Archer attempted to smile, but only having the corners of his mouth angle upwards a bit. "England and King Richard have us. We will follow Robin Hood, our leader and our friend! And when the king returns, we will overthrow the tyranny that infected the English land."

Guy brought a goblet of wine to his lips, smiling at Archer who reminded him of the old Robin. "I envy you, brother. You still have dreams which I lost years ago."

Archer grinned. "I am not Robin Hood, but there is something Robin and I have in common – our belief that we can improve lives of many people and protect those whom we love." He paused, his face revealing bitterness as he thought of the changes in the hero. "I know that Robin is disillusioned, but I am sure there is part of him that still wants to fight for peace, for England, and for the downtrodden."

Marian measured Archer with a skeptical look. "I would love to think so, but I doubt that."

"I agree," Guy chimed in.

"I still hope that one day we will see the old Robin," Archer persevered. "I know that there is no absolute justice and peace, but I want to do as much as I can to make England a better place."

Allan entered the conversation. "We are Robin Hood. We will help him save England."

Guy glanced at Allan in amazement; then he funneled his attention back to Marian. "England cannot be saved. Most likely, Prince John will become the king after King Richard's passing, God bless our king. If Richard makes Prince Arthur his heir, John will try to kill his nephew. Anyway, there will be another Vaisey and many others who will rule in tyranny in Nottingham and other lands."

Marian smiled morbidly. "I lost my dreams too. The old England is gone, and there is no coming back."

Soon Guy and Archer excused themselves and left; Allan began to talk with other courtiers.

Marian placed a silver empty goblet on the table, her eyes scanning the chamber. She veered her gaze to the large window, her eyes taking in the imposing outlines of the Maubergeonne Tower. As her gaze briefly fell on Robin and Melisende, her heart tightened in her chest. Wild deities of jealousy were suffocating her from the inside out, and she broke eye contact with Robin. Thank goodness, she thought fervently, that Robin and his wife were sitting at the opposite end of the chamber.

Thoughts of Robin began to plague Marian like bees in a flower garden. The past three months spent in Aquitaine awakened in her a wealth of various memories of Robin, which were both achingly fascinating and entirely heart-stirring for her. When Robin had lived in Aquitaine years ago, she had visited the court in Poitiers with her father and had spent two months there with Robin. Now Marian was bathing in nostalgia for the loveliness of her early youth, and she had to close her eyes against the unwanted sting of tears.

The sounds of an exotic Provencal song pulled Marian out of her reverie. She again caught herself on the thought that she wanted to be anywhere but not in the banqueting hall, her heart longing to escape.

Allan queried her, "Daydreaming, Marian?"

Marian managed a smile. "Yes, I was remembering the days of my early youth. I was here, at the court, once." She lowered her voice that quivered as musically as a harp string as she went on. "It was a great time in my life, and I would go back in time in a heartbeat if I could."

Allan studied her closely. "You were visiting Robin in Poitiers, right?"

In a quavering voice, she corroborated, "Yes; it was a long time ago."

Allan nodded. "This is exactly what I thought."

"I am not a seasoned courtier, but I like Queen Eleanor's court, but I love this place," she said, sipping some wine. She had grown up in Nottingham, in the local noble community, and had been sheltered by Sir Edward; yet, when she visited Robin in Aquitaine that had charmed her. But today she couldn't enjoy entertainments and the splendor of the court.

"Robin is not yours," Allan reminded her. "I know that you are like a frail bird with a broken wing after Much's death, but there is nothing Robin can do for you. Although he is mourning for Much too, he cannot be with you because he is married. He cannot fix you. But you are strong enough to cope without him."

Marian wasn't astounded that Allan was able to read her thoughts so well; he had been her only friend in Nottingham after Robin and the outlaws had departed to the Holy Land. "You are correct, Allan. I know that Robin and I cannot be together, but I can be happy serving England and my people." However, a gnawing doubt lingered in the back of her mind, but she couldn't voice it.

§§§

Wishing to find solitude, Marian set off from the great hall and headed to the vast royal gardens. The bright moon hung over the garden, full and lustrous, its sweeping light making the water in fountains shine like liquid silver. Her stroll in the garden was strongly reminiscent of the days when she had been in Aquitaine with Robin. Her eyes were taking in the foliage gleaming in the moonlight, and she could smell the deep rich fragrance of flowers. But this sweet scent that normally heartens one's spirit disconcerted Marian; she tried to block thoughts of Robin, but she failed to deter the assault of her memories.

Tears of despair and pain welled up in her throat, behind her eyes, and Marian had to pause so that she could take a moment to force them all back. As she regained composure, she stomped towards a nearby alley of oaks and meadows. Her wild emotions churned and bubbled like a whirlpool inside her, but her tears were now under control. Marian couldn't stop thinking of Robin, and his name was like a chant in her heart, giving her a sense of peace which, however, was not real because she could never be utterly happy, knowing that Robin, her Robin, belonged to another woman.

She wandered aimlessly in the garden until she lost her way in a maze of paths and trees. She stopped near a small fountain and glanced around, marveling at the majestic gardens. All at once, her heart tingled with ineffable joy as she heard a familiar voice speaking to her in English – Robin's voice.

"It is very late for a lady to be alone in the garden. Is that your way of seeking calmness and stillness after being in the ruckus of the court?" Robin asked softly, wishing to placate her.

She spun around, her eyes searching for Robin. Her gaze flew to him, her heart thumping so frantically that she feared it would burst. Robin was sitting on the bench, with his arms folded over his chest, staring steadily at her. Emotions overwhelmed her, and her heart blossomed like a flower at the thought that she was again alone with Robin, all the more in the romantic darkness, in the deserted area of the garden.

She eyed him with a dreamy smile on her face. As she was accustomed to seeing him in his green forest garb, it was still somewhat unusual for her to see him wearing court attire, but she liked him in these clothes. Robin was so attractive with his sandy hair roguishly falling over his forehead and his solemn pale blue eyes, his handsome face with those full sensuous lips. As her gaze traversed his figure from his head to his toe before returning to his eyes, she realized again that she loved Robin in a way she had never loved Guy, for Robin was her soulmate and her true love; she was only infatuated with Guy.

"Robin," Marian called in a trembling voice.

Robin was struck by a dart of love and longing at the sight of his childhood sweetheart. He could barely contain his emotions, and his heart was thrumming like a hummingbird's wings.

As the moonlight fell upon an alluring Marian, he found himself engulfed in flames of desire, feeling as if every part of him were yearning to become one with her. As she stepped closer, he thought that Marian was a divine creature whom he loved since his adolescence. Now she was some twenty years old, and she was no longer a maiden or his betrothed, but a woman whose marriage had been annulled; yet, she was still his Marian in many ways, and their bond was still a strong emotional attachment. Marian was no half-opened rosebud but a woman in the full resplendence of her beauty, and he wanted her vehemently.

Robin pulled himself together and took a deep breath so as not to let his desire cloud his thinking. He asked teasingly, "Are you so scared that you prefer to talk to me from such a distance?"

Marian took a step to the bench where he sat. "Of course, I am not afraid of you."

He forced himself to not show even a flicker of his real feelings. "Nothing could frighten the fearless Lady Marian." He made a serious effort to look serious, but then he laughed at her. "Did everything change so much that you are scared to be with me without a chaperone? Or are you afraid of the darkness?"

She shot him an annoyed look. "Sometimes, I hate your wit, Robin."

He looked over her slender figure, and a scalding fire ignited in his gaze. He glanced away for a moment to regain his control; then he swung his gaze back to her. "I can easily forgive you if you fear to be in the darkness, but it would be the tragedy of my life if you are terrified of me." Despite his attempts to conceal his feelings, his flat voice had a note of disappointment and hurt that she might feel that way about him.

She took another step to him and now stood almost near the bench. "I didn't expect to find you here. I thought that you are with Queen Eleanor and your wife in the great hall."

"The Queen Mother and Melisende are on the banquet," he enlightened in an official voice. "My wife has many admirers, and she can spend some time without me."

Jealousy stirred in her heart. "I thought that Lady Melisende cares only for you."

Robin felt his heart beating faster at the thought of his wife. He flashed his most charming smile and asserted proudly, "Of course, she loves me and only me."

Marian immediately found herself in a cantankerous mood. His thinly disguised hint at her betrayal angered her, and the wrathful words came out of her mouth in a rapid stream. "Congratulations, Robin. I My life is a nightmare in which I suffer and live through all unimaginable travails of my mind. Here, at Queen Eleanor's court, I feel as if I were drowning in a deep river. I wish I lived on an island surrounded by a sea, without people who want to upend my life." She paused for a moment and inhaled sharply. "I escaped from the palace to find freedom for some time." She paused as her emotions filled her to the brim. With as much fortitude as she could muster, she went on. "Yet, I met you here, and you ruined my moment of peace. I thank you for that, Robin Hood." She spun around, intending to leave.

"Stay," she heard his plea, and it made her froze, her heart hammering harder. "Come here." She saw him motioning her to sit on the bench next to him. "It has been a long time since we last spoke in private."

She turned to him. One of her brows lifted in surprise, and then her eyes narrowed with suspicion as she ominously growled, "What? You think that you can convince me to stay? Maybe it will be better for you if I leave, or you risk to be saddled with me for another hour."

Robin braced himself for her anger. At least now everything was out in the open, and he knew what she felt at the moment and why she had come to the garden. "I am sorry if my words unsettled you."

She sighed dejectedly. "I should say no to you, but I won't." A quick flash of pain crossed her face, but she conquered it. "I have a proclivity for talking to you when I should not."

Marian was tempted by his heartfelt invitation a lot, even though it wasn't the right thing to be with him in the dark and lonely garden, in such a potentially compromising situation. Yet, she craved to talk to him, and she longed for his touch and kiss, his voice and the presence. Even though they were no longer together and Robin was a married man, there were many memories and events which had joined them together forever. Deep emotions roiled through her body, and her eyes were smoldering with the rampant heat of desire; with effort, she reined in his passion and brought his feelings under control.

She covered the distance between them and sat down on the bench. Now she could see his face so close that she lost her breath for a few heartbeats. "What are you doing here, Robin?" Her voice was a bit hoarse.

He looked directly into her eyes, and a languid smile spread across his visage. "I needed to think."

She had that singular sort of smile on her face that sent Robin's heart racing. As he smiled back at her, she dissolved in a sea of desire, but, with great effort, she managed to push it away. Yet, her pulse quickened in barred excitement, and she wished him to take her with all the fire and thoroughness with which he fought a war for England and King Richard. Being close to Robin was like standing in a sunbeam, and the warmth of this imaginary sun was contained within her body, heart, and soul only when she was with him.

"What were you thinking about?" she inquired, her eyes warily sliding to a tall oak, whose roots peeped out, its verdant leaves glistening in the moonlight.

Robin averted his eyes and stared into the darkness. "I remembered Much," he replied in such a low voice that it vibrated in his chest, but Marian could hear him very well and glanced back at him.

They stared at each other, united in their abysmal grief over Much's death. His eyes filled with tears, and tears welled in her eyes as well. They were haunted by the heart-rending scene of Much dying in Robin's arms. But while Marian was simply mourning the loss of her friend, Robin's pain went to the very depths of his heart, for he had lost not only his friend but also part of himself too. In the past few months, they never spoke about the tragic events in Pontefract Castle, and they never spent time together.

Tears brimmed in her eyes as Marian leaned closer to Robin and took his hand in hers. "I know what you feel, Robin. I am mourning for Much, too. You are so moody, and so am I; one moment we may be merry like hummingbirds; the next, we are sullen and secretive if we remember Much."

Chasmal grief washed over Robin like a violent ocean wave. "It is ultimately my fault that Much died," he pronounced desperately. He was clinging to her hand, as if it were the last straw in an ocean of despair. "Much followed me and believed in my fight. He died because he believed in Robin Hood and in Robin of Locksley – he believed in me." He sighed morosely. "The idea of Robin Hood destroyed my best friend."

"Robin, you shouldn't–"

Robin interrupted her. "Much went to Pontefract not because he joined me in my mission to bring King Richard home." He sighed sorrowfully. "He could have stayed with Eve in Northampton after my return to England, but he preferred to leave her and be with me in order to protect me."

Marian's heart constricted in anguish, and she struggled to resist the urge to wrap her arms around him. "Much would have followed you to the ends of the world."

Robin fixed his gaze at a large flowerbed of red and white roses. "Robin Hood always saves kingdoms, kings, and queens, but his friends die." He laughed bitterly. "Why does a hero fail to save his best friend?"

"You are alive because God wanted you to live while Much's time on earth was over."

He glanced back at her. His shoulders sagged as if the weight they bore were too heavy for them. "Much was a better man than I can ever be. He deserved to have a long, happy life." He drew his hand through his hair. "God made a wrong choice when he took Much's life while letting me survive my mortal wound."

"Robin, you are an utter fool," Marian declared, shaking her head disapprovingly. "Much would have been very angry with you now if he heard you now. He sacrificed himself to let you and me live, out of his love for you. He would have been distraught to watch the torture you are inflicting on yourself."

Robin felt another twinge of guilt stab at his heart. "Much would have berated me for doing that."

"I am sure that Much can see us now. He must be furious at you, Robin."

"When I was a boy, my father once told me that people become stars after death." He looked heavenward, as if he were trying to find Much among countless shimmering stars in the huge expanse of the night canvass. "Maybe Much became one of these stars, and I can find him now in the sky."

Marian's grinding sense of worry was replaced with the soothing coolness of relief, for he seemed to have calmed down a bit. "Much will always be in our hearts."

Robin smiled slightly. "Every time I look up, at the sky, I think that Much watches me."

Marian and Robin didn't speak for a while; their minds drifting back to Much and their happy childhood. They were giving tribute to the heroic man who had saved them a few months ago in Pontefract.

Marian demanded, "Please promise me that you will stop blaming yourself for Much's death."

He shook his head stubbornly. "I cannot."

"If anyone is guilty of Much's death, it is me," she choked out, thoroughly distressed. Tears were trickling down her cheeks, and she was on the verge of breaking down. Right now, Robin could feel the intense wave of guilt she emitted. "Vaisey threatened to kill me, and you shielded me from that arrow! You wanted to save me from Vaisey, and Much craved to save both you and me!"

Robin tossed his head. "No! Please don't say that, Marian!" he begged her, his eyes full of a pain that didn't seem like it would ever go away. "I would have done anything to save you! I would have died for you!"

"Robin, you…" Her voice faltered. After a moment's pause, she resumed speaking. "You are such a handsome, loyal, noble-minded, brave, foolish, compassionate, arrogant, foolhardy, and strong man…" She paused again, letting out a long breath. After a moment's contemplation, she told him what was really on her mind since his resurrection. "I was such a fool that I didn't understand you completely before."

He smiled at her with a smile that disrobed all his heartache and pain. "It is my fault as well. I have never been honest with you."

Marian took a deep breath, her eyes drinking in his handsome features, her heart thumping; fresh tears came into her cheeks. The words coming out of his mouth filled her to the brim with pure happiness. Instinctively, Robin shifted on the bench closer to Marian, and he glanced into her eyes full of tears; he knew that she was crying for him, for what they could have together but had lost.

Robin's eyes met Marian's, and his thumb caressed her cheek. "Marian," he breathed.

Marian and Robin stared at each other as if ensorcelled by some vision. They were united in their grief and longing for the old days. They could see the reflection of their undying devotion in each other's eyes, and it seemed to them that the warmth of a mysterious deity circulated through their veins. They knew that it was the deity of love, for their love was indispensable to their nature, like the air they breathed.

As Robin took in the loveliness of her features, his lips curled into a contented smile, his eyes so filled with such a tenderness that she allowed a soft low moan to escape her lips. Suddenly, he made the first move and captured her lips with his hungrily, sweeping her into a whirlwind of frenzied passion. All too soon, he stopped and pulled away slightly for a split second, both of them gasping for air. In a space of a heartbeat, his lips were at her throat, and she arched, stretching her neck out as far as possible. His mouth then moved up to her ear, and he kissed the tender spot just below it after sweeping her hair aside.

Her name floated from his lips as he stared into her dazzled eyes that widened at the blue fire in his, at the unguarded expression of passion and devotion. Breathlessly, Marian watched his mouth hastily descend to hers again, his lips warm and hard. Marian flung her arms around his neck and kissed him back possessively like it was the last time she would, and he deepened the kiss. His arms tightened around her, and she trembled, her blood and body singing with a sensual excitement and need for more. This kiss was not like tender kisses they had shared during their two betrothals: he was kissing her as if he were going to consume her as their bodies clamored for fulfillment and their blood thickened.

Robin was the first one to come to his senses. He pulled away from Marian, although she instinctively melded herself closer to him, but he abruptly drew back again. His eyes glowed feverishly as he glanced into her intoxicating eyes that, God help him, bewitched him like those of a sorceress. He felt an acute pain penetrating his soul at the thought of what he had just done. He kissed Marian when he was married to Melisende! Their kisses constituted adultery, and he couldn't forgive himself – would never forgive himself for betraying his wife tonight. Now he exuded more guilt than he had imagined himself capable of.

An inexplicable pain – the pain of her unsatisfied need for him – lanced through Marian. A poignant longing for him surged through her, and she discovered that she wanted Robin as much as she had ever wanted him before. As their gazes locked, her eyes grew fantastically open: they were like windows to her soul, and all the nuances of all her innermost feelings were revealed to Robin. Feeling like she was laid bare for him, she averted her eyes, knowing that he was watching her and feeling that his look had changed.

Marian turned to Robin, and her ghostly sapphire eyes filled with tears while still staring at him like she had never seen him before, snaring him in their depths until her gaze shifted once more. She blinked away the humiliating threat of tears as her eyes lit with determination to be strong. She looked at him again, but her composure instantly slipped a notch, and Robin could see her turbulent and plaintive eyes that were filled with love and were soft with an entreaty for something he couldn't quite comprehend.

Their love wasn't God's little joke – they did still love one another deeply. They had just committed an act of adultery, and temptation could prevail again. Their hearts were vibrant with passion that they had to annihilate. A blur of sweet words, given promises, warm embraces, and heartbreaking separations flickered through their minds in a montage of memories. Then came repentance of ever hurting each other and wanting one another when they had no right to be together. And then, suddenly, they both were eager to imagine that their love was only a gracious fable, except that it wasn't.

Robin and Marian climbed to their feet and exchanged a soulful, ever-penetrating glance.

Robin broke eye contact. "No," he said curtly. His mouth had twisted. "I am ashamed."

Trembling in mortification, Marian blushed to the roots of her hair. "Robin, please don't close yourself off to me… Don't do this to me…" Her voice came to a halt.

He stared back at her and lamented, "God, what have I done? Please forgive me, Marian."

"Robin… Robin…" she kept repeating his name as she made a step to him.

"Marian…" he began but trailed off; his tone contained a silky thread of warning; he took a step back. In a fit of contrition due to his guilty conscience over his actions, he murmured, "I am very sorry… It will never happen again." He had conflicting emotions: it had been a moment of weakness, and he had surrendered to his passions; nevertheless, he had enjoyed kissing her, although now he was unbelievably incensed at himself.

Marian considered the implication of his words. "Don't say that, Robin." But her real thoughts mirrored Robin's: she condemned them for their actions, but she didn't regret that he had kissed her.

"You want to know what I feel, Marian?" He swallowed hard, hoping that she didn't decipher the shakiness in his voice. "I will tell you the truth. I didn't control myself very well because you were too close."

"Robin…" Marian rose to her feet and stepped to him, but he backed away from her.

"I am trying to not stay alone with you because it is dangerous for us." There was a tremble in his voice, his eyes were blazing with fire. "When I told you that I haven't forgotten you, I wasn't lying."

Marian didn't want to lose the precious connection with him – their love. "Robin, I haven't forgotten you either." Before she had finished, she was fighting back tears. "I tried very hard to fall out of love with you, but I failed. When I am so close to you, these feelings obliterate any coherent thought in my head."

Robin could see tears in her sapphire eyes, feeling as if he were drowning in their depths; yet, he wasn't going to lose control again. "I had never known what it is to be torn between two ladies before I married Melisende," he stated, surprised how calm he sounded; he finally managed to get a grip of his emotions. "I had never understood what you felt for Guy and for me and why you were so confused about your feelings. But now I know what it is to be torn between two women."

"Robin, you have always been too special to me. I will never forget the night we spent together." By the end of her admission, her cheeks were flaming bright red.

He sucked in a staggered breath. "What?"

She gazed reverently into his eyes and blurted out, "I know now that I have always loved you." Tears spilled down her cheeks. "I began to understand that after your death. When you came back, I realized that I lost you forever, that I lost the love of my life."

Robin's intense gaze was unfathomable in the darkness. "What?" he gasped.

"Robin, you have always been special to me…" Her voice trailed off. She desperately searched for a way to articulate her feelings. "I know that we cannot be together, but we cannot forget each other either. We are trapped between the past and the present."

Robin sighed. "That is true," he said flatly, resting his eyes on her face. Then he smiled ever so slightly. "But the old Robin is dead." He sighed heavily as he carefully considered his next words. "Death brought clarity into my head and also changed my priorities in life."

"I know." She dreaded to hear what he would say next.

His expression evolved into feigned calmness. Uneasy emotions churned inside him as he wondered whether he should finish the speech he had formulated a few moments ago. How could he? She already felt hurt. Yet, they needed candor between them, and, as matters stood, she deserved the truth.

Robin was incapable of lying to her blatantly. "Marian, part of me will always love you, but my feelings are no longer as strong and vibrant as they once were." His voice quavered, and a melancholic smile tugged at his lips. "I love my wife, Marian. I don't need you as much as I need her."

Marian gave a nod, tipping her chin up with an amazing dignity for a heartbroken woman. She knew that he wasn't lying. She had lost him, he had lost her, and their romance was over. Yet, the feelings she still had for him were stronger than his residual affection for her. She steeled herself against all these emotions, taking her comfort in the fact that she didn't need Robin as much as before in spite of still loving him.

A grin manifested on her face, then vanished. "Everything is a choice. We made our choices, and we must live with them. I don't regret what we had together, but I think I can live without you."

"Good for you. I wish you all the best." Robin bowed to Marian, then swiveled and walked away. Marian was his past, and he would never completely get over her, but his future lay with his wife and their son.

Marian stood near the bench for a while, watching Robin disappear into the dark garden. Maybe she would be happier on her own, she thought. She was reaping what she had sown because she herself had left Robin. And if any peace can be found without feeling the bittersweet weariness of her life, Marian would probably find it in serving the people of Nottingham. Nevertheless, in the dead of night, she would always dream of Robin and of finding herself again in the powerful grip of a mesmerizing passion.

With these thoughts, Marian slowly started her way back to the palace. All of a sudden, she stopped rooted as she saw Melisende standing near a nearby fountain. "Lady Melisende, how can I help you?"

Melisende looked expectantly at Marian, her face impassive, her eyes blank. Her emotions were a tangled skein of love, hurt, and anger, but she wasn't going to look vulnerable in front of Marian. She had eavesdropped enough, she had seen Marian and Robin kissing, and the vision of her husband and her rival for her husband's heart had almost broken her. But she knew that Robin wanted to be with her, which pacified her anger and made the forgiving streams of warmth softly trickle through the walls of her heart.

Melisende responded nonchalantly, "Excuse me for my intrusion on such a private moment you had with my husband, Lady Marian. I heard your wonderful conversation in the garden. I hoped that Robin's love would guarantee that I would never have to meet the fate of an abandoned woman, and I was right."

Marian summoned all her self-control as a prickly awareness stirred her mind – the woman who vied with her for Robin's affections had heard everything. "It is an unequivocal hint that Robin is yours."

"I am not offended, Lady Marian, and I am not going to argue with you."

An embarrassed Marian felt the heat rise to her cheeks. "Lady Melisende, I swear on all I hold sacred that Robin will never stray. He is married to you, and I will never trench upon your happiness."

Melisende scrutinized Marian's face that she could see rather well in the moonlight. "I know that, and I respect you." She elucidated in a conciliatory tone, "Don't think that only your heart is heavy. My heart is aching as well because I will never have Robin's whole heart, and no woman will have it." Then Melisende swung around and stalked away without a backward glance, leaving a shaken Marian alone.

§§§

Not only Melisende had heard Marian's conversation with Robin. When both Marian and Robin had left, two men appeared from behind the trees. They were Archer and Guy, who had been there when Marian and Robin had appeared, talking about their mother, Ghislane, and about Guy's childhood.

"What a great insight into the lives of Marian and Robin," Archer uttered as they stopped near a large nearby flowerbed of roses and lavenders.

Guy looked up, at the dark canvas; then he glanced back at Archer. "I am glad that we saw them tonight." Robin's hold over Marian was too strong to break it. He didn't want to always be the second best for Marian.

Archer's black brows shot up. "Really?"

Guy folded his arms over his chest. "You think I am lying to you, right?"

"I didn't expect to hear that from you."

"A year ago, the truth would have decimated me," Guy said tiredly. His shoulders slumped. "But now everything is different. I changed and learned to live a life filled with goodness, humanity, and meaning."

Archer rewarded his half-brother with an adoring smile. "I am so proud of you, Guy."

Archer and Guy stumbled into Robin near the entrance to the Maubergeonne Tower. In order not to block the way for the guests who walked in and out of the palace, they retired to a nearby terrace.

"What are you doing here?" Robin asked, his eyes flitting between Guy and Archer.

Archer grinned sheepishly. "Yeah, we had a stroll in the gardens. It was stuffy in the great hall."

A suspicious Robin was quiet for a moment. "Well, the abundant scent of perfume and wine is not pleasant."

"Very unpleasant," Guy's voice rumbled.

A smile spread across Archer's face, reaching both his eyes and lips. "I am extremely impressed by the court! This is the best place in the world!"

Robin's expression evolved into wistfulness. "I have many happy memories about the court. I miss those carefree times of my youth; it is a pity that these days are gone."

Guy smiled listlessly. "I cannot say that the Queen Mother's court makes me dream of the old days, but it is definitely very beautiful here. It is a good break before a new battle."

Archer sent a sly glance towards his brothers. "Good God, I am a poor thing! We are at the court of love, and I don't even have a mistress!"

Guy shot Archer a condescending look. "What are you talking about, Archer? Do you have some shame?"

Robin grinned indulgently. "Guy, be more understanding of our brother's desires! You and I were like him in adolescence." His eyes flew to Archer. "Archer, you can find many willing women at the court. I had many affairs with Poitevin ladies, and I can introduce you to some of them if you want."

Archer regarded Robin sardonically Robin. "Robin, I want to find a sweet beauty!" He smirked. "I already have a woman in mind. She is Lady Catherine de Mathefelon, Lady Melisende's lady-in-waiting."

As if he had received a douche of icy water, Robin stiffened, for Archer had referred to his former lover; it didn't matter whom his half-brother had meant. Should he abet Archer's lecherous desires? Women flocked to him like bees to honey, and he had had his share of affairs. Archer was young, his blood was hot, and he was willing to embark on amorous escapades. "I can help you if you want, Archer. However, you must not settle for a promiscuous way of life because overindulgence renders men effeminate and weak."

Archer's mouth curved wryly. "Don't worry, brother. I won't become a philanderer."

Guy shook his head disapprovingly. "Damn you, Robin!" he grumbled without hate in his voice. "I had affairs in my youth, but I have never been like you. Don't teach our brother to take an example from you!"

Robin smirked. "I am sure that if we look at the matter from another angle, we will see that you are not so different from me. After all, you are older than me, Guy."

"Say whatever you want, Robin," Guy growled. "I don't care."

"On a serious note, Guy," Robin jumped to another topic, "what are you going to do?"

"Ah, this…" Archer only sighed.

Guy heaved a sigh. "I have already made my choice. I won't go against the king's order."

Robin sighed. "It is a wise decision, Guy; but not because I don't want Marian and you to be together."

"I know," Guy purred. "I… don't want to marry Marian anymore."

A surprised Robin raised a brow. "I have never thought that I would ever hear that from you."

Archer's eyes were oscillating between Robin and Guy. He was pleased that Guy had made up his mind.

"Well, you see, Robin, everything can happen," Guy retorted with a smile.

"Stranger things happened." A distracted Robin examined the terrace illuminated with the dim light from flickering torches that lined the pathway to the palace. Then his eyes flew to Guy. "Maybe it is for the better for each of us," he mused aloud, more to himself than to Guy.

Guy couldn't disagree. "Exactly." As he detected vulnerability in Robin's eyes despite Robin's impassive features, his heart sank. "Whatever happens usually happens for best."

Robin smiled softly. "Certainly."

In a tense, pressing silence, Guy and Archer watched Robin walk away.

A bewildered Archer inquired, "You didn't say that we saw him and Marian."

"He doesn't need to know that," Guy said curtly. "Let's go to the great hall."

The guests were enjoying the music of troubadours when they appeared in the banqueting hall.

Archer tore his gaze from the musicians to his half-brother. "I love the music of troubadours."

Guy ran his eyes over the chamber. "Me too."

Guy's gaze fell at Queen Eleanor, Melisende, and Robin who sat together at the main table, listening to the song, but Megan wasn't there. Guy lingered his gaze at Robin who plunged into an artistic delight, enjoying the performance. He thought that Marian remained in the garden alone, but his mind swiftly drifted back to Megan. His eyes were frantically searching for Megan – right now he wanted to see only her.

Suddenly, Guy felt his heart thundering in his chest as his eyes found Megan. She stood alone in the corner, in the opposite part of the hall, leaning against the tapestried wall. Tonight she wore a tight gown of silver brocade with a low V-cut neckline and an ample skirt trimmed with gold braid at the hem. Guy let his eyes dwell on her bosom adorned with a massive oval cut diamond necklace; then his gaze traveled to her head. His eyes drank in her long dark hair that fell down her shoulders and her back in spite of all the diamonds and sapphires which were carefully weaved throughout the length of her hair.

Archer intercepted Guy's gaze. "Go to Meg and talk to her," he prompted.

That goaded him into action, and Guy nodded wordlessly. As he stalked towards her, his eyes were fixed on Megan's face that was alight with gladness as she listened to the music. Guy smiled at the thought of how much Megan loved the art of troubadours; passion for life blossomed in her young heart.

"Meg, I was looking for you," Guy began as he stopped a small distance from her.

Megan was in a state of dazzled astonishment. Nascent hope flooded through her, but she hurriedly suppressed it. She gazed into his eyes, and the warmth in them encased her. "Did you talk to Lady Marian?" she asked in English, even though she preferred Norman-French. She spoke in English only because the majority of the courtiers didn't know this language, and she didn't wish them to be overheard.

Guy shook his head. "I didn't talk to her, but I saw and heard enough."

"I am sorry, but I don't understand." She turned her head to look at the Queen Mother.

A prominent troubadour from the southern France, Bernard de Ventadour, was singing "Can vei la lauzeta mover" ("When I see the lark joyfully moving its wings against the sun's rays…") in the trobar leu style, his tragic and most famous love song. It was the song about the knight's unrequited love for his lady.

Can vei la lauzeta mover

de joi sas alas contra.l rai,

que s'oblid' e.s laissa chazer

per la doussor c'al cor li vai,

ai! tan grans enveya m'en ve

de cui qu'eu veya jauzion,

meravilhas ai, car desse

lo cor de desirer no.m fon.

Megan's mind was centered on the song. "Alas, I thought I knew so much about love, and really I know so little, for I cannot keep myself from loving her from whom I shall have no favor," she translated aloud, her heart palpitating with pain. She felt as if she were the knight from the song as her feelings for Guy seemed to be unrequited. "She has stolen from me my heart, myself, herself, and the world. When she took herself from me, she left me nothing but desire and a longing heart."

Guy took a step to her and then put his hands on her shoulders, looking at her with rapture mingled with despair. "Meg, you cannot imagine how true this song is about me."

Ai, las tan cuidava saber

D'amor, e tan petit en sai,

Car eu d'amar no.m posc tener

Celeis don ja pro non aurai.

Tout m'a mo cor, e tout m'a me,

E se mezeis e tot lo mon!

E can se.m tolc, no.m laisset re

Mas dezirer e cor volon .

The troubadour started singing another verse. "Never have I been in control of myself or even belonged to myself from the hour that she let me gaze into her eyes – that mirror that pleases me so greatly. Mirror, since I saw myself reflected in you, deep sighs have been killing me. I have lost myself, just as handsome Narcissus lost himself in the fountain." Megan's heart froze inside her chest at the thought that she was probably doomed to never be loved, like the knight from the song, but she must not show her emotions.

Megan exhaled a sigh; her chin was tilted upward, her mouth compressed into a tight line. "Do you want me to say that this song is about me?" She reacted as if he had stung her: she jerked back with undisguised agitation. "You know about my true feelings for you, Guy! Are you relishing in torturing me?"

Guy's confidence changed into dismay. "Never."

Insecure, she stared unseeingly ahead. "Then what do you want?"

"I have missed you," he announced sincerely.

Megan veered her amazed eyes to Guy. "Guy…" She quickly recovered from the shock. "Don't lie to me just because King Richard commands you to marry me."

"It is not a pretense, Meg," he assured her.

Meanwhile, Queen Eleanor shifted her gaze to Guy and Megan. She smiled, thinking that they were a stunning couple. Eleanor then gazed at Bernard de Ventadour who stood near the main table. The queen looked back at Megan, thinking that the young lady whom she trusted and loved would be happy with Guy.

De las domnas me desesper

ja mais en lor no.m fiarai;

c'aissi com las solh chaptener,

enaissi las deschaptenrai.

Pois vei c'una pro no m'en te

vas leis que.m destrui e.m cofon

totas las dopt'e las mescre,

car be sai c'atretals se son.

The troubadour moved on to sing the next verse about the knight's abject despair and the lack of trust to all women; he claimed that he wouldn't budge on his opinion. "I despair of women, no more will I trust them, and just as I used to defend them, now I shall denounce them. Since I see that none aids me against her who destroys and confounds me, I fear and distrust them all for I know well they are all alike."

Megan glared at Guy. "Maybe you are considering two options." Her voice was hushed. "You may disobey King Richard, or you may decide to turn your back on me after the wedding." She was so nervous that her control was slipping; she thought she could cry one moment and the next scream in rage at the vicissitudes of fate. She strove to maintain a neutral façade, but she was failing miserably.

His eyes darkened in emotion. "I have been waiting for a meeting with you."

She looked undisputedly abashed, and her countenance was for a moment tinctured with crimson before turning pale. "If you are kidding me, then you are a very cruel man."

Guy's face grew immensely serious. "Listen to me, Meg. I am not lying: I have been thinking of you."

There was a clang of mistrust and almost anger in her voice. "Good grief, how can I believe you? If you want to woo me just because you must wed me, then please don't do this. I don't need your friendship, Guy."

"I don't need it either, Meg."

She was eager to shed a few tears over the seeming hopelessness of her personal situation. "I cannot have what I want. My dreams will never come true."

"That kiss in the forest meant everything to me," he admitted in a throaty tone.

As the meaning of Guy's words sank in, Megan said nothing in response. She thought that her heart would break from exhilaration at the thought that he did really want to see her.

Several more verses were sung while all the courtiers were listening closely to the long, sensitive rhythms of the song. Troubadours composed many love songs that glorified, cherished, and romantically seduced women. The magnificent clothing style of the ladies looking at their partners with passionate eyes, combined with indulgent manners, made the court of love fabulously fascinating for everyone.

Pus ab midons no.m pot valer

precs ni merces ni.l dreiz qu'eu ai,

ni a leis no ven a plazer

qu'eu l'am, ja mais o dirai,

Aissi.m part de leis e.m recre;

mort m'a, e per mort li respon,

e vau m'en, pus ilh no.m rete,

chaitius, en issilh, no sai on.

When Bernard de Ventadour finished singing, the audience exploded in applause.

Guy looked warmly into Megan's eyes, his heart swelling with love for her. "Since with my lady neither prayers nor mercy nor my rights avail me, and since she is not pleased that I love her, I will never speak of it to her again," he translated, smiling at her. "Thus I part from her, and leave; she has killed me, and by death I respond, since she does not retain me, I depart, wretched, into exile, I don't know where."

Megan looked as vulnerable and helpless as a girl, and Guy wished only to take her into his arms. "Guy, you are seducing me with sweet words, but I don't want to laugh," she said, her voice shaking. Unshed tears pooled in those deep blue eyes of hers, and his breath caught in his throat. "Like in this song, I should run away from you before I burn in my love for you, Guy."

"Good gracious, Meg!" Guy spoke desolately. "The words from the song mean that I left behind the past and the woman who could never make me happy – Marian. I am free!"

She gasped in amazement. "What?"

His face lit up with an endearing smile. "I left the past behind. I will marry you, willingly and gladly."

"What?" she repeated.

Guy groaned in frustration that she didn't believe him. "Unlike many others, you usually can see through me, read my thoughts, and feel my pain better than anyone else. Do you not see the sincerity in my eyes?"

The candlelight fell on her cheekbones and awakened a gleam of happiness in her eyes. But then her jaw clenched, and ire was apparent in her tone as she bit out, "I want to believe you, but I cannot. Why do you need me if you love Lady Marian?"

With a convincing grin, he eased her suspicions by admitting, "Marian will never forget Robin. Nothing would be more hurting for me than having a sham of a marriage, which is why I won't marry Marian." He leaned closer to her, his lips yearning to meet hers. "I don't love her."

"Is that true?" It was a long time since she felt as happy and alive as she was feeling now.

"Yes," he replied, smiling radiantly at her. He outstretched his arms, pointing all around the room. "And please don't tell me that you don't want to be my wife. I cannot imagine that you would prefer one of these lords to me."

Megan was in an exultant mood, her visage tinged with a holy and unutterable happiness. "You will never have to share my affections with anyone," she promised. "I never was in love before I met you. Otherwise, I would have married someone else a long time ago. But I dreamed of marrying a man I loved him."

"There is nobody like you, Meg."

"Oh yes, that is true!" She chuckled and then paused to let out a long, merry laugh.

Guy smiled tenderly. "Meg, you have such beautiful eyes."

Something about Guy's voice informed Megan there was more that needed to be said and discussed in private. As he reached out a hand for hers, a blissful warmth enveloped her, giving her a sense of security she had rarely known before. "It would be a dream just to live all my life with you."

He offered in an implicative voice, "I think we need to talk."

She inclined her head. "I know one lovely place in the gardens. Let's go there."

Guy cursed in his mind, the vile oath doing naught to appease the intensity of his frustration. He didn't want to return to the garden where he had seen Robin and Marian, but he didn't object and nodded.

§§§

Megan and Guy slowly walked through the moonlit royal gardens. Soon they reached a small green terrace that neighbored with another garden enclosed by a wall, with an opened gate at the very centre. As they walked through the gate and stopped near a bench, a night breeze blew the sweet scent of flowers over them. The garden was full of flowers that bloomed in a blend of red and white on one side of the garden; the other side was full of green and blue, all contained with bricks and lush grass walking paths. It was really a cloistered place where one could face their inner struggles and talk about a future; it was a place where one could find something calming and inspiring.

Her eyes effervescing with joy, Megan raised them to the vault of the blue-black sky where starts were shimmering like a million diamonds against black velvet. Her lips parted slightly, and she thanked God for the happiest day in her life which she had believed would never come. Then she glanced at Guy and smiled mirthfully, motioning him to take a seat on the bench. The moon shone with serene splendor and shed its silver light all around, and Guy admired Megan's glorious beauty.

Guy took her hand in his and planted a kiss on her palm. He then glanced into her eyes and gave her a slow, tender smile. "It has been a long time since I felt so content," he whispered.

A sympathetic Megan smiled at him compassionately. "You suffered too much, Guy."

A shadow crossed his face. "After Isabella and I were banished from Nottinghamshire, I took an oath of revenge on Robin," he continued in a voice laced with bitterness. "I served Vaisey only because I wanted to re-take the Gisborne lands back and to gain power, thinking that it was more important to me than happiness." He sighed. "I killed many people in cold blood and very brutally. I became a murderer in the Forest of Rouvnay and in the city of Angers where I killed many of Richard's knights."

"I recall that you beheaded that knight at Vaisey's behest." She knew Guy's biography pretty well because he had been very frank with her during their imprisonment. A surge of intense, righteous anger rushed through her, and she blustered, "Vaisey is the scourge of mankind! He perpetrated a great many bad things, and he is irredeemable! He must be burning in hellfire for his crimes!"

He lowered his head in shame. "That night damned me."

Megan could feel the worry and remorse radiating from him. "This monster cornered you."

He nodded and looked away, at the stone wall of the terrace. "I was fearful of escaping from Vaisey because I owed him a huge debt." He paused, sighing deeply. "Well, you know this story."

She just flat-out hated Vaisey. "I do."

Looking decidedly uncomfortable, Guy shook his head. "After the fire at Gisborne Manor, I didn't believe in happiness. Vengeance was my only dream, but the power of executing it was beyond my grasp for years. When I robbed Robin of his titles and lands, I was an idiot to think that I had won and defeated Robin. With a sinking feeling, I realized that my revenge was meaningless and left me hollow."

"You didn't think that you can ever be happy," she finished for him.

"You are absolutely right, Meg."

"Let me guess what you experienced," she continued. She set about diffusing his crestfallen mood. "You wondered why you were homeless while others had a family and didn't need to roam around Normandy and work for a piece of bread. You thought that they were lucky and happy, and you envied them."

Guy looked torn between amusement and vexation. She understood him so well, and that made him happy and also irked him as he didn't like feeling as if she had peeled him open and now all his fears and sorrows lay bare. "Yes," he supplied uneasily. "When I was very young, I wanted to have a family the most; to feel that I wasn't alone and there was someone who loved me." He sighed. "But I wasn't fortunate enough to have these things."

"Vaisey couldn't make you feel even content with your life and your choices."

"Of course not," he acknowledged.

She hesitated to ask but then spelled it out. "Were you happy when you married Marian?"

Guy smirked darkly. "I was overjoyed only at the beginning. "I quickly realized that she lived missed Robin." He smiled sadly. "I naively believed that I would be able to make her forget Robin."

Her eyes wise and intelligent, Megan spoke rhetorically. "Passion is not love: it sizzles and fizzles out quickly. If there is no love between a husband and his wife, imminent danger of separation lurks behind every corner. Loveless often marriages fall apart; then spouses are stuck in misery and must face the necessity to survive in a loveless marriage." She fell into silence for a moment. "Love is a much more stable thing – a thing of sacrifice, compromise, and understanding. Love is a much deeper feeling than passion. If you don't share principles and values with your spouse, then they start experiencing severe conflicts."

He scoffed glumly. "Now I know that."

For a while, they didn't speak, holding each other's arms, their fingers entwined, as they listened to the distant sounds of the songs coming from the banqueting hall.

"Yeah, love is a complicated thing," Megan broke the silence.

He nodded an affirmative. "I was very angry with Marian for loving Robin." He sighed. "Only after Robin's death in Acre, I realized why Robin was always in her heart."

A look of confusion flitted over her pretty features. "Did she confess that she still loved Robin?"

"No!" Guy growled, suddenly angry at himself. "I simply realized that nobody can give me redemption, and I have to earn it. I pray God will grant me the remission of my sins." Unwelcome recollections of all the pain he had endured and the vile deeds he had committed crowded his mind. He grimaced and attempted to block these thoughts. "I also changed my opinion about Robin: he is truly a great man, a better man than I can ever be. I understood why Marian respects, admires, and loves him so much." He looked down, on the lawn. "I began to doubt that Marian's feelings for Robin would ever fade away."

She raised a brow. "Is it a lingering love?"

Guy turned his gaze to her. "I think so, Meg."

"My father felt the same for your mother for a long time. That's why he wedded my mother in ten years after he had broken his betrothal to Lady Ghislane."

He arched a brow in bemusement. "Interesting."

She smiled. "This is one of the reasons why my father always felt sympathetic to you."

"Now I understand why he asked me to take care of you before his death."

For a long moment, they sat in silence, remembering the fight in Nottingham when Megan's father had been killed. They were united in their grief, their hearts aching for the loss of another honest man.

"I quickly figured out that Marian loves Robin," she admitted.

At that Guy snorted. "Even though Marian and Robin changed, part of them will always cling to the old days and to the love they lost."

Megan nodded. "They both are dreamers, Guy, even though they became disillusioned dreamers."

He gave a husky, knowing chuckle. "Dreamers struggle to accept harsh reality, and they often fail."

"Robin and Marian lost their dreams, and they don't like what they see in the world."

He lifted his hand and let his fingers slowly caress the side of her face. "Indeed."

"Women like extraordinary men," she speculated, staring into space. "Robin is an unusual man."

He forewarned her, "I may become jealous, Meg."

Megan turned to him and scoffed. The sparkle in her blue eyes indicated how much she enjoyed his jealousy. "I don't think that being jealous would be nice of you. Be careful, Guy." She poked him playfully in the ribs. "You are a free and good man." She smiled mischievously. "But if you don't stop saying that, I will consider myself free to claim that you are becoming a man who is not able to give me both the moon and all the stars shimmering in the sky. But I covet to have all these things."

He appreciated her wit and was charmed by it. "Oh, Meg…"

She spoke wisely. "Jealousy shows your inner insecurity, and it contains more of self-love than of love. And you don't want me to think that you are still as disgustingly selfish as the old Guy was." As Guy bobbled his head in understanding, she continued, "Never underestimate the power of jealousy which can destroy a relationship, Guy. I have only you in my heart, and you have no reason to be jealous." She put a finger to his lips and traced the contours of his mouth. "If you are jealous, you torture yourself and others."

Guy had been awfully jealous of Marian to Robin; it had been a great torture for him to think of Marian's affair with his ex-archenemy. Megan loved only him, and that was a soothing balm to his heart. His face then turned pensive. "I knew that I was committing terrible crimes while I served Vaisey, and my heart was in a constant, turbulent riot against all the things this devil forced me to do!" He broke off, raw emotion in his eyes. He sighed and went on. "I always blamed others for my own sins and mistakes, and I saw my redemption in Marian and her purity. However, after the events in Acre, my world began to change, and I no longer saw a guiding light in Marian."

"You have always been a strong man, but you were not willful enough to break from the past."

"That is true. Robin gave me a chance when he beseeched the king to spare my life. Marian pushed me to redemption as well." He drew a deep breath. "And then I began to change."

"You became your own savior, Guy."

Guy stared at her with a smile. "Meg, are my savior too."

Her eyes twinkled as if in mystification. "And what did I do for you?"

His eyes glowed in the moonlight. "Firstly, you saved my life, and you did that knowing about my heinous crimes. Secondly, you attracted my attention because I was genuinely interested in you. You charmed me, and I was unable to resist you." He released a sigh. "Marian first attracted my attention because I knew that she was Robin's former betrothed whom he abandoned to go fight in the Holy Land. Later, I fell in love with her, except that this love wasn't real."

"So you were interested only in me – just in me?" she asked incredulously.

"I swear it is true, Meg," he confirmed. "I was exhilarated when you told me on the day of our execution in Nottingham that your heart belongs to me."

Megan flashed a dazzling smile. "I did."

"Later, you said that we were no longer dying and, thus, we could be only friends."

She climbed to her feet, walked over to the distant wall of the terrace, and stopped there, leaning against the wall. He stood staring at her, not knowing what to do and think; she was looking at him strangely, almost woefully, but there were no tears in her eyes.

"Dear Meg," Guy addressed her as he got to his feet. "Why did you run away from England?"

Megan's eyes darkened with sudden ire, as if nightfall had settled in them. "Don't you understand, Guy? I didn't see any future for us. I was sure that you loved Marian and wanted to wed her." She smiled bitterly. "I had to protect myself from the heartbreak you could cause me."

Guy stared at her with desperate eyes, and she could see a silent apology in them. His arms possessively encircled her and held her against his firm body. She rested her cheek against his broad chest, feeling the strength of his heartbeat and taking comfort in it.

"Forgive me for hurting you, Meg," he whispered, stroking her hair.

She was melting in his arms, her thoughts dissolving. "There is nothing to forgive."

She needed to know one thing. "I was already torn between you and Marian at that time."

She looked at him with eyes that glistened with tears of happiness. "Really?"

"Yes," he breached. "Marian somehow seemed distant, although I had some feelings for her."

Megan's visage shone with hope. "Can you love me… in this arranged marriage?"

Guy felt his body weakening for a brief moment, for he was too close to Megan, the gorgeous, beautiful, young, and yet innocent creature who had such a great power over him. "I feel deeply for you," he said truthfully. "You cannot imagine how much I need you."

Megan disentangled from their embrace and She looked into his face, and a sense of wonder overshadowed all her other emotions. "Guy…" she murmured, tears trickling down her cheeks in a torrent of relief, joy, and happiness.

A cloud came over the moon, and the black darkness reigned around. Yet, despite the darkness, Guy could still see tears running down Megan's face, a fire burning in their hearts.

"Meg, I never had peace and happiness," he said in a low coming from the deepest depths of him. "I always fought for something, even though my fight was often wrong and useless. My vile deeds put me in the cross hairs of many people who will probably never think of me as a good man. But all that I needed was some love and peace." He lapsed into silence, his eyes lighting a shade in his apparent chagrin. "I used to think that Marian could give me peace, but I was mistaken."

"But you wanted peace?"

His fingers trembling, Guy reached out almost timidly and gently touched her check. "And I found love, peace, and understanding in our relationship." His voice turned lower. "I fought many battles and lost many of them, but I won the war – I changed myself." He smirked. "But I am too tired to fight with all the doubts and pain associated with Marian – that won't give me peace."

Megan glanced into Guy's eyes and spoke the sacred words that meant more to her than anything else. "I will love you until doomsday."

Megan started shivering as pleasurable sensations sweeping through her as she was so close to the man she loved with all her heart. Guy cupped her face in his palms, and started planting featherlight kisses over her eyelids and cheeks. His mouth found hers, and he kissed her with an increasing desperation and a primal urgency. The feel of her lips beneath his brought him ambrosial delight; his tongue was exploring her mouth, inflaming them with passion. Her breathing was uneven, her body feeling as if it were being consumed by flames of love; it was a sweet madness, and Megan wanted it to go on and on. As Guy broke the kiss and looked down at her face, his eyes bore into hers, with an intensity that set her blood on fire.

Guy had fallen in love with Megan a while ago, but for some time, he had been fighting with his growing affection. He loved her deeply and unconditionally; he needed her desperately. He had realized that he had loved the idea of Marian, although indeed he did love her in his own way. Guy's love for Marian was a strong, deep feeling, which was possessive, obsessive, and, most importantly, devastating. His love for Marian was a love for a pure–hearted virgin whom he needed to get absolution. He loved Marian as the ideal of what he wanted to have but couldn't.

He smiled at the thought that his love for Megan had never been his saving grace in a world of darkness. His love for her was life-giving, peaceful, and ardent, as well as tender, caring, and all-absorbing. His love for her provided him with completeness, exaltation, hope, and delight; these precious feelings destroyed all the dark demons that had been tormenting him for years. He always felt happy with her, without pain and doubts. Guy could see the light of his life in Megan, and he couldn't help but dream what it could give him in a future, feeling hopeful and euphoric.

Guy breathed in deeply until he could take in no more air. "I love you, Meg," he whispered.

Megan asked in a trembling voice, "Do you really love me?"

He nodded. "I do," he responded with conviction, though with an odd shyness too. "My heart doesn't belong to Marian or the idea of her." He smiled blissfully. "It does belong to you."

"Guy, I love you more than life itself," she answered, unable to prevent a muffled giggle from escaping.

He smiled. "Then, my lady, will you have me as your husband?"

She looked a little sheepish. "I will," she consented.

Guy kissed her on her lips, putting all his ardor and devotion to that kiss. Megan was lost in a maelstrom of sensations, her heart drumming against her ribcage. Their hearts, souls, and bodies were on fire, helplessly assaulted by a wonderfully fierce emotion. The whole world seemed compete and good, even though they knew that it wasn't.

All at once, Megan and Guy heard the rustle of skirts. They parted and swung around to see the female figure nearby. The moonlight fell upon the newcomer's face, and they recognized Marian. Megan's mouth dropped open in a shocked "o", and all the color drained from Guy's face.

"Good evening," Marian greeted. She smiled to herself, amused by the outcome of the evening: she had managed to meet Robin and then had faced Melisende; then she had wandered aimlessly in the gardens, and then, by sheer accident, had found the place of Guy's rendezvous with Megan.

"Marian," a perplexed Guy uttered.

Megan's heart was in her throat. "Lady Marian, we hope that you are having a pleasant evening. We are very sorry if we caused you any sort of inconvenience."

Guy lowered his eyes and muttered "oh". "Marian, I hope we didn't wrong you."

Marian smiled at Guy, her heart suddenly light at the thought that they would now have the clarity they all needed a lot. Megan didn't know what to say, looking apologetic as if for her lapse in manners.

Marian's face broke into a brilliant smile. "You two should not be so embarrassed that I found you here, in the moonlit garden." She looked between Megan and Guy. "I am abreast of the latest news."

Guy eyed Marian attentively. Her words sounded like irony, but for some reason, he felt guilty at the thought that he had hurt Marian's feelings and pride. "Marian, I am so sorry…" His voice halted.

Marian revealed, "Guy, I talked to Queen Eleanor some time ago. She revealed everything to me."

A surprised Megan glanced at Marian. "You know about our arranged marriage, Lady Marian?"

"I do," Marian said calmly. "And I don't object to your marriage."

Guy studied Marian closely. "You don't, Marian?"

A smiling Marian nodded. "I think it is the best that could happen to us, Guy."

A look of bewilderment settled over Guy. "Why are you saying that, Marian?"

Megan surveyed Marian, fearing that she had misheard or misinterpreted her words. But as the meaning of them sank in, she said nothing, for it wasn't her place to interfere.

A smile perished from Marian's face. "It is for the better, Guy. I want to be honest with you. I couldn't make you as happy as you deserve. I tried very hard to forget Robin after our marriage, but I couldn't."

Guy felt only slight regret at Marian's confession instead of a stab of furious jealousy through his heart. He asked curiously, "Did you ever love me, Marian?"

The question caught Marian off guard. She professed, "Guy, we had many happy moments together. "I guess that's a fair enough answer." She didn't want to hurt him by admitting that she had been infatuated with him and that that infatuation had occurred at the beginning of their relationship when sexual attraction had been central and Robin had been out of the picture.

"And what do you feel for Robin?" Guy wondered whether she would lie to him now; she didn't know that Archer and he had overheard her and Robin tonight.

"Robin," Marian murmured, an elfin smile playing over her lips as if she were keeping a secret. Her yearning for the hero was briefly reflected in his eyes before they turned blank. "I have always loved Robin. I loved him when he went to the Holy Land for the first time and I broke our betrothal, when he returned to Nottingham and was outlawed, and when he proposed to me again in the forest."

Guy's low chuckle was quite unpleasant. "And then you married me."

Marian was quiet for a breath-held moment, her throat thick with bitter shame. "Yes."

Guy replied gratefully, "Thank you for the truth, Marian."

A strangled laugh erupted from Marian as she thought of the love triangle she had created. "When I was confused with my feelings, I should have left both Robin and you, Guy."

"I would have been the right decision," Megan interposed.

Marian sighed ruefully. "You are correct, Lady Megan. But what is done is done."

"I am sorry," Megan blurted out as Guy glared at her.

"No need to apologize. Lady Megan said the truth," Marian allayed her, smiling somewhat sadly.

An understanding smile on his face, Guy dramatically proclaimed, "It seems that Robin, you, and I are destined to go on separate paths."

"Yes," Marian agreed with a smile, feeling a flood of relief so deep that she almost burst into tears. "My feelings for Robin are an organic part of me, and I will never forget him."

Guy swallowed hard. Every nerve in his body was screaming out for him to tell her how much she had hurt him, but he didn't. "This is exactly what I thought."

Marian smiled with an affable smile at Guy. "I wish you happiness, Guy."

As he looked into the eyes of his former wife, some unidentifiable emotion flickered in his eyes. "Thank you, Marian."

"Thank you, Lady Marian," Megan echoed.

Marian smiled vibrantly. Her seemingly final breakup with Guy didn't shatter her and didn't irreparably mar her self-confidence: her heart was light like a feather, and, above all, she felt as if a veil had been lifted from her eyes, enabling her to look around and comprehend the significance of life. She spoke in a voice palpitating with sincerity. "You will be happy together, and it will make me happy to see you so." Then she swiveled and marched off in the direction of the palace.

"Oh," Megan breathed. "It seems it's over."

"It is over," Guy echoed, scooping her into his arms. She could think of nothing to say in response other than an excited "oh" as she buried her face onto Guy's chest.

At the thought that his relationship with Marian was over, Guy felt as if a great burden had been removed from his shoulders and as if now he were standing near the gilded entrance to paradise. He was finally moving in the right direction, and the remnants of the past faded into the promise of the future.

---

I hope you enjoyed this chapter and the plot. As I am fond of courtly love and Aquitaine, and I hope that you like these chapters about Queen Eleanor's court and the way I portray it.

The Marian/Robin/Melisende love triangle hasn't been resolved yet; it will happen in the finale, in chapter 16, or maybe nothing will happen at all. As I warned you several times, the finale will be more dramatic for Robin than for Guy, but Robin will find peace in the very end.

I thought that Marian and Robin needed another moment of frankness, and I hope that you liked the scene in the garden. After Much's death, they didn't spend time together and didn't speak at all despite spending several months at Queen Eleanor's court. I wanted them to talk a little bit and to show that they still love each other but know that they cannot be together. Now Robin doesn't love Marian as much as he loved her before her marriage to Guy, and he cannot blatantly lie to her. In this moment of sadness, Robin wants Marian and cannot think straight: he kisses her and she kisses him back, but they both know they shouldn't have done that, although they enjoyed it. I think Robin wouldn't have kissed Marian and betrayed Melisende in any way if he wasn't so distraught; Robin is ashamed and feels guilty.

It was especially difficult to write all the Guy/Meg scenes in this chapter, and I hope you like them. Megan and Guy needed to talk about their feelings and the situation they found themselves in thanks to Queen Eleanor and King Richard. They are lucky that they love each other and, thus, have a chance to be very happy in this arranged marriage. The Marian/Guy/Megan love triangle seemed to have been resolved. Was it really so? Or will fate intervene and something will happen? Will Guy marry Megan? What will Marian end up alone, finding the purpose of her life in serving the people of Nottingham? You have to be patient and wait, and you will get the reply to your questions in the finale of this epic.

Reviews are always appreciated, including constructive criticism.

If you find any typos and/or mistakes here, please let me know about them in a private message.

Thank you for reading this chapter. Have a lovely weekend.

Yours faithfully, Penelope Clemence