AN: Sorry about any grammer my spell check and stuff wasn't working. I fixed what I caught.

Chapter 14

Fiona had the Abel and Trinity was on a date with Hale. The house was quite, cleaned and dinner on the table. Jax would be home any minute and it was gonna be story time. Tara could feel her heart in her throut, the idea Jax would hate her, How much did she tell him? Did she tell him about the baby to or just the rape, did she tell him Gemma knew?

Tara had left the shop right after her talk with Jury, she said bye to Jax and told him to be home by 8 and if there where any problems tell Opie she was keeping her threat. Jax didn't know what she meant but figured better not to know when it came to those two. It was 7:59 and Tara was now just waiting. She decided to dress normal, jeans and a lose top, figured if they are gonna fight then mine as well be comfortable. A minute later she heard Jax bike pull up and the idea of telling him made Tara feel a little sick. She sat at the the tabel when he walked in noticing the look of sadness written all over his face as he entered their home.

FEW HOURS EARLIER

Gemma on the phone

"Clay these charges are never gonna stick, only one other person knows and their dead. We just need to bring Jax close."

"How do we do that?"

"We pull him away from the one thing pulling him away from the club. Tara."

"What are you gonna do?"

"Just leave it to me baby, Jax just pulled in, I'll call you later."

In the clubhouse

"Hey baby you ok?"

"Hey ma, yeah i'm good why?"

"Just checking in with all that's going on I want you to know I loved your father i'd never do what they claim."

"Ma I know don't worrie, we all know this is bullshit but until it gets proven the club needs to look strong that's all this President vote was." Jax Knew he was lying but he wouldn't let his mother know the truth.

"Oh baby I don't care about the vote, I get that. I care about us."

"Ma we're fine."

"Ok well how is Tara doing? I mean pregnancie can be hard on some woman."

"She's doing good something about nesting period going on, least that's what Fiona keeps saying." Tara had been crazy looking at baby stuff the last few weeks.

"No problems considering?"

"Considering?"

"Well with the accident that happened and i'm no doctor but does what happened before leave damage for future pregnancies?"

"Happened before?" Now jax was all kinds of confused.

"You know the abortion." she whispered the last part and Jax eyes went wide. "Oh god baby you didn't know? She said you both wanted it."

"What are you talking about? And mom don't mess around just tell me."

"When you were like 17, Tara came to me told me she was pregnant and you both agreed this is was a bad time and she needed an abortion, I wasn't happy but I took her. Baby she told me you knew."

Jax got up and left his head was spinning, he needed to ride, needed to think.

Present

Jax made it home on time like he promised but instead of being happy to see her he was sad, angry and very confused.

"Jax baby whats wrong?"

"We need to talk."

This was not going the way Tara thought tonight would. They both sat down at the table after a few minutes of silence Jax spoke.

"Is this our first child?"

Taras eyes widened with shock, where was this coming from, what was he asking, hell why was he asking it?

"Well we have Abel, so no."

"DANM IT TARA!" Jax slammed his fist on the table in anger, he quickly tried to calm himself and ran his hands threw his hair "Don't try and be funny i'm be serious here."

"Jax i'm not trying to be funny I don't understand what you're asking."

"I'm asking did you get pregnant and kill our baby?"

"That fucking bitch." Tara was pissed now, she knew were this was comming from and she knew what Gemma was trying to do.

"Excuse me?"

Tara stood to angry to sit at this point and paced the kitchen "Let me guess the Almighty Queen told you I got pregnant and she took me for an abortion, or did she leave that part out?"

"No she admitted to taking you, said you told her WE agreed it was for the best."

"WOW Jackson, just fucking WOW!

"Tara tell me what the hell is going on?"

"Well let's see, you are an idiot who can't see the holes in his own mothers lie and just accused me of killing our child."

"Babe look I started this off wrong, I can see that but you still have not admitted to not having one so will you please help me understand? And before you get more mad at me can I point out I went straight from my mother to our feild alone, to home. No crow eaters inbetween so hopefully you can see i'm trying here."

Tara had to admit she was angry but she was so happy he still managed to get home on time and wanted to talk about this not just push her away. So she sat back down almost feeling calmer knowing he didn't resort to his old ways, yet.

"Ok I'll explain but you let me tell you everything and then we talk about it, you don't leave, don't push me away and if you fuck someone else it's over. Deal?"

Jax just nodded "First let me point out that you think your mother AGREED to help me kill your baby, the same woman who tried to kill Wendy, the same woman who held a gun to a baby to find Abel would let me kill the next generation samcro?"

"Ok I see your point, so please baby what happened?"

"This is hard for me so please just let me talk. I did have an abortion and it might of been yours I don't know." Tara was crying already so ashamed of what she was about to tell him. "At Clays birthday blow out when we were 17 I drank way to much and I hurt like hell from crashing your bike so I figured i'd go lay down in your room. Well, while I was in there this guy came in way more drunk then me and he thought I was some crow eater I guess and well... he was to strong for me to push off." Tara looked at Jax and the anger on his face was clear but she didn't no if it was towards her or not. "When it was over some girl walked in and saw me naked and him dressing, she quickly told Gemma I guess because next think I new she was screaming at me. God Jax I'm so sorry, baby please don't hate me."

Jax face screamed pure anger until she beeged for him to not hate her, his face went white and filled with shock how could she think he would. Jax got up and from his seat, pulling Tara up from hers and led her to the couch. He would of taken her to bed but with having to retell that story he didn't no if a bed was where she wanted to be. Tara sat on the couch and Jax grabbed a blanket off the chair putting over her and him and he held her against his chest never saying a word just let her cry for a while. After about a half hour Jax spoke.

"I am mad at you but not for why you think, I'm mad you didn't tell me then, and i'm mad you think I could hate you, and I'm mad at me for not realising something happened. But Tara I need to know how the abortion comes into this and what you meant before. "

"You never realised because as much I was scared you would leave me, only being with you made me feel safe, I know Opie thought something was wrong but think he put it down to dad issues. About eight weeks after I found out I was pregnant I was so scared and went to Gemma. She knew about the rape and let's just say she didn't care because and I quote NOT LIKE YOU WILL BE AROUND LONG, YOU'RE NO OLD LADY. When I told her about the baby she said having another mans baby would make you look bad I need to deal with this, so that's what we did."

"I'm gonna kill this son of a bitch."

"You can't."

"Like hell I can't, son of a bitch is dead, i'm gonna..." Jax didnt get to finish.

"No baby you can't he is dead. I'm telling you all this because when you watch the tape from Jury tomorrow you're gonna hear how the guy banged John Tellers future daughter in law. Which also means Clay knew. Gemma told them the guy was lying she would know if I had cheated."

"God baby I'm so sorry this shit happened to you and I'm sorry you had to support my mom threw hers when she did nothing for you. I will make sure my mom goes down for JT and I will make sure no one ever touches you again. I love you.

Tara never felt such releaf and Jax never felt such love for a woman. He knew she was tough but this was an entire knew level of tough. They made love that night like never before. Jax took his time with everything making sure she felt nothing but loved. Tara watched in amazement at him, he knew the truth and instead of running or looking at her with disgust or pitty he looked at her like he would never get enough of her. Kissing every inch of her body, making her cum with his mouth and then his fingers, until finally he pulled her on top of him and laid back wanting to see all of her. "Baby use me."

To anyone else this meant nothing but to Tara this meant everything. When she was younger and her dad would yell at her or hit her she would get so worked up that one wrong move and she would flip out on you, quite a few hang arounds found this out the hard way. Jax knew she needed an outlet something to release all frustration and he told her one night to use him. Be as rough as she wanted, do what ever she wanted. At first Tara wasn't sure, Jax was her first and they were still pretty vanilla when it came to sex, she was shy when they would try something new and she liked it so when Jax told her to use him she blushed but then Jax explained.

FLASHBACK

"Babe you can't keep fighting if you want to go to collage and you have said it before sex always makes you feel relaxed. So use me, take out all your frustration on me, don't hold back, don't hide, and don't be ashamed. Hell we won't even talk about it after words."

"Jax I don't think,"

"Tara don't think just feel, no that your safe with me and I love you."

After that night when ever things got real bad Tara would let her wild show and she would fuck Jax how ever and where ever she wanted know shame. The last time she used him was in the bathroom of Cara Cara and god did she feel good after.

...

Jax and Tara laid in bed after, Tara had put on a Jax t-shirt and he had his head rested on her belly talking to the baby.

"Hey sweet girl, help daddy out, kick if you think mommy should marry me tomorrow."

Tara looked up in shock and Jax grinned when his daughter did in fact kick.

...

AN: Well what do you guys think? I Hope These few chapters make up for my lack of being gone I am truley sorry so much has been going on. But because I feel so horrid here is some clues to whats to come...

Some more Hale and Samcro teamwork.

Someone has a daughter

and we get closer to Gemma's outcome.