14~

For the first time in sixteen months, the whole gang was back together, and Air Temple Island was to be their base of operations. Katara was ecstatic, especially to see Sokka. He was mostly down in the South Pole helping their dad and Gran-Gran and Pakku rebuild. The letters he sent described a place Katara could barely imagine, and she couldn't wait to see it. He and Suki maintained a sort of wobbly cordiality towards one another during the conferences for the sake of the group, but Katara could tell there were still feelings there, especially on Sokka's side. Katara was amused to see he'd grown a sort of stubby goatee since the last time she'd seen him.

Toph was there as well, back from her latest meander through the Earth Kingdom, looking for Earth Rumbles to win and bandits to fight, both of which, she said, she had found in abundance. Katara saw Toph reasonably often, once every four or five months, because she often passed through Republic City since, as she said, it was the farthest she could get from her parents while staying on solid ground. Geographically this was distinctly untrue, but Katara didn't press the point. She knew Toph had roundabout ways of saying she cared.

And Zuko was there as well, even taller, somehow, than the last time she'd seen him, though only by a little bit. Men and their growth spurts, she thought wryly to herself. Aang was going through the same thing.

They were all scheduled to be there for three full weeks, attending various functions and meetings in their more official capacities, and hanging out with each other in their down time. Katara was secretly pleased that it meant Aang couldn't go haring off to the Eastern Air Temple for a while. But then she felt guilty for being pleased. But then she felt sort of weird for feeling guilty, and then she was just confused. Why shouldn't she be glad to have him home for a while? she asked herself. Because it meant he was prevented from doing something he cared about more than her, another part of her whispered back, and she was so shocked that she had to sit down. Of course that's not true, she told herself strongly. Aang loves me. Aang loves me. This became her mantra and she repeated it endlessly, it seemed. Aang loves me. And she loved him. That made everything worth it.

Yet she found that every time she opened her mouth at every single meeting she attended, that it was to answer a question about Aang, or to say something about Aang, or to speak on behalf of Aang, and not a single person asked about the work she herself had been doing. She tried to talk to Aang about it, but the only advice he gave her was, "Well, if they annoy you so much, maybe you shouldn't go to them anymore." He was so sincere, his wide grey eyes fixed on her earnestly. He had gone right back to the Air Nomad philosophy of sidestepping issues, all of Toph's "you gotta face it head-on!" training thoroughly forgotten. And that wouldn't have helped her problem at all anyway, and she grew increasingly upset about it as the days went on. Midway through the second week of meetings and conferences, after snapping at a minister who got on her very last nerve, she decided to talk to the only person she could think of who might be able to help, or at least sympathize: Suki.

That evening, when Aang and Toph were sparring and Sokka and Zuko were discussing some kind of trade deal Kuie had proposed for the United Republic, Katara took a pot of tea to the meditation pavilion, where Suki was watching the sun set. Suki smiled when Katara sat down next to her and Katara offered her a cup of tea, which she accepted. They sat in the quiet together for a while, until Katara worked up the nerve to ask, "When you lived in the South Pole with Sokka, did people ever ask you what he would think about something rather than what you thought about it?"

Suki sighed. "Sometimes," she said sadly. "But that's not why we broke up."

Katara, sympathetic, did not mention that she has actually wanted to talk about her own problems.

"It was like… I felt like we were pouring so much energy and effort into his home and his culture and I didn't feel like I had as much of a place as he did. I know the South Pole was hit harder by the War than Kyoshi Island. We actually got off pretty easy until Zuko showed up that one time. So in some ways it was appropriate that we give his home and culture more attention." Katara froze. Suki had unknowingly put her finger right on the crux of her own problem. She didn't interrupt, just listened quietly as her friend spoke. "But that doesn't mean….. Like, even in terms of our relationship, it was like I had to accommodate him so much more than he did me. I felt like I was making all kinds of allowances for him and he never wanted to do that for me. And, I mean, we were fighting about a lot of stuff besides that, and he had sort of gone back to being a sexist meathead sometimes." Katara grimaced, but wasn't surprised. "I guess we broke up because we grew up, you know? We were really only puppy love, and what with the War and everything we had almost no time to get to know one another properly. We knew we were really attracted to one another and we didn't know that wasn't enough to base a relationship on. And I think he was secretly still really hung up on Yue."

"Yeah," Katara agreed without thinking. Suki glanced at her sharply and Katara felt her face heat up. "I mean, sorry, it's just… he never got any closure with her and I think that stayed with him."

Suki turned to face the sunset again, looking pensive.

Before Katara could think of something that would alleviate the gravity of what she'd said, Zuko appeared coming up the path from the beach. "Hey," he said. "You two look serious. What are you talking about?"

"Relationships and stuff," Katara said, wondering if he would react the way men always seemed to when women brought up the topic.

But, "Oh?" he said. Maybe a little warily, but not actually repulsed.

"Why did you and Mai break up, Zuko?" Suki asked, indicating a spot next to them where he could sit down. He did so. But he didn't talk for a while. "Well?" Suki encouraged.

Zuko sighed, and said reluctantly, "Mai broke up with me because she knew she wouldn't be happy with what was expected from the wife of the Fire Lord."

"Yikes," Suki said appreciatively."'It's not you, it's the job.'"

"I had just proposed to her," he said glumly.

Katara stared at him, a weird little knot of tight confusion popping into existence in her chest. "I didn't know that!"

"Well I wasn't exactly going to broadcast it," he said sarcastically. Zuko and Mai had been together for two years after the War ended before suddenly breaking up three summers ago. Katara had never learned why, but evidently there has been reason for that.

"I'm sorry," Katara said as gently as she could.

"I'm fine now," Zuko said shaking himself out of it. "It's been years. The worst part has been that all the court women are throwing themselves at me because I'm available." Katara and Suki laughed. "What brought all this up anyway?" the Fire Lord asked, obviously trying to deflect attention from his own drama.

"Karate is having problems with Aang," Suki said in business-like tones.

"What!?" Katara spluttered. "I never said that!"

"Katara," Suki said gently. "People don't just ask about other people's' old relationship problems out of the blue like that. You obviously have something on your mind."

Zuko and Suki were both looking at her, and despite her discomfort and confusion, she slowly told them all the things that had been worrying her and bothering her over the past months. She tried to make it sound like she wasn't having such similar problems as Suki had had with Sokka, but her words just kept coming and before she knew it she has told them everything. How out of place she felt in what was supposed to be her home, and that Aang seemed far more concerned with the new Airbenders than he was with her, and how badly she wanted to feel necessary to something again. And speaking it made her realize the depths of the truth. She needed to feel needed. And she didn't at Air Temple Island. The realization was painful and abrupt and she ceased speaking when it came upon her.

Suki and Zuko were both looking at her with concern. "Katara…. You don't sound like you're happy here," Suki said cautiously. Katara sniffed.

"I want to be though," she said. "I'm trying so hard to be. And I love Aang. Shouldn't that be enough?"

"Absolutely not," Suki announced firmly. "Your life is made of more than your relationship, and if none of that is making you happy, then there's something wrong."

"I agree," Zuko said, frowning. "I'm ashamed to admit I used that argument to try and make Mai stay with me, but she set me straight. If you're not happy, you should make a change."

"And do what?" she asked tiredly. "My whole life is here."

"Your whole life?" Suki repeated, raising her eyebrow.

"Well, not my whole life, of course. Most of my family's in the South Pole, and all my friends are spread out all over the place. But a lot of my life is here."

"A lot of the parts that seriously frustrate you, from what you've said," Zuko suggested seriously.

Katara threw her hands up. "What do you want me to do then? Leave this place?"

"Why not?" Suki struck back, quick as a prickle-snake. "Travel for a while. Visit people and places you haven't seen in a long time. What's the worst that could happen? You might enjoy yourself?"

Katara, despite being nineteen now, still piqued just as she had when she was fourteen at the accusation of not being fun. Her spine went straight and taut and she snapped out, "Maybe I will travel then!"

"Great!" Suki exclaimed. "Come visit Kyoshi first!"

"Fine," Katara agreed recklessly. She wasn't an impulsive person, and she hadn't anticipated how much she would enjoy the feeling. "I'll even go home for a while! See what all the hype about the South Pole is for."

"What's this I hear about the South Pole?" Katara turned and saw Sokka, Toph, and Aang all coming towards them from the direction of the Temple. Sokka was the one who had spoken, and she saw him hesitate slightly when he noticed Suki sitting with his sister and the Fire Lord, but joined them after all. Toph and Aang sauntered up without noticing the hesitation and plopped down in the midst of the group.

"I'm going to be visiting it soon," Katara explained, eager both to tell him about it and to cover the awkwardness he felt about being so near his ex.

He brightened immediately. "Hey, that's great! I'll be able to show you how much we've rebuilt."

"I can't wait to see!"

Aang was looking confused. "When did you decide this?"

"Just now, with Suki."

"Isn't that a little abrupt?"

"Shut up, Twinkletoes, it's a great idea!" Toph retorted. "You should visit Omashu too," she said to Katara. "Bumi challenged me to a duel so I'll be down there at some point soon."

"Okay," Katara said. Then, "Wait, a duel?"

"Just a friendly Earth Rumble-style match, nothing to worry about," Toph said, rolling her eyes.

"We're not worried about you two, we're just wondering if the rest of the city will be standing when you're done," Sokka joked.

But Toph sounded serious when she said, "That's a good point. I'll make sure we move it out of the city." The whole group laughed.

The next ten days of conferences went well, though Katara was still asked about Aang's opinions more than her own, and the older Airbenders who had returned for the conferences (thankfully, Malu had stayed put at the Eastern Air Temple) renewed in their reluctance about including anything from her culture in the Temple, even when she and Sokka tried to make Gran-Gran's delicious sea prunes for dinner one night. But finally it was all over, and Katara packed her things and got on the ship with Suki to return to Kyoshi Island.

A/N

Whew! I told you it was a (comparatively) long chapter this time! I figured it was time to get some action happening, so Katara's going to spend the next while traveling, mostly solo, learning lessons and doing good and having fun.

Also, kudos to readers who find the alarming dose of alliteration I have in here. I know, "Always avoid alliteration," but rules are made to be broken, dang it!

All characters are owned by Bryke, Nick, and Viacom

E.I. signing out