Hello and sorry for being so very late with this.
As the Doctor says: Busy life. Moving on.
Finally, the 9th Doctor couldn't stand it any longer and picked both of his future versions up by the collars like dirty kittens and divided the hug. Both shot him dirty looks but he paid no attention. He wanted to get away from this thing as far and as soon as possible. He really hated peeks into his future, especially if it involved tragic reunions, mainly because the prerequisite for each reunion is the parting of the ways.
"Oi you two! A bit too clingy aren't we?"- he exclaimed, eyeing them to make sure they didn't attach right back to her when he let them go. This, to his dismay only earned him a snigger from Donna, a snigger he could swear, that if it contained any words, they would be 'I told you so'.
"Of course, they are. After all, they're all you." – old Rose started but was immediately interrupted by the 10th Doctor who did not like that comment-
"Oh, no,no,no! I am not too clingy, It's just you who is the one too-he struggled to find a word, clicking fingers- too unclingy! Mister 'don't look at me I'm a monster' I am just the right amount of clingy, thank you!
"Yeah, lighten up a bit!"- 11 piped in, fishing out his hat from his transdimensional pockets to plop it back on his head in what he probably thought was a challenging motion. "Turn that frown -upside down!"
"Oh, I am ever so sorry if my serious demeanour offended you!"- 9 responded with so much sarcasm that older Rose was sure that if she had a way to harvest it as energy, she and her Doctor would be back in their parallel universe in no time and would never again need to charge their TARDIS. As amusing as it was to see him trying to win in an argument with himself, there was still work to be done. Today, if at all possible. She was just about to start saying something when the 9th Doctor continued, his voice raising in volume gradually.
"I better start taking life less seriously, just like you! Proper role models that you are, trapping Rose on a parallel universe just a couple of times!" – and even before he had finished the sentence he just knew he had gone one step too far. The 10th Doctor's eyes had darkened dangerously and he stepped forward purposefully, but he wasn't about to back down from some skinny pretty boy who thought he knew it all and just flexed his fists in preparation.
Both Roses and the 11th Doctor reacted quickly- nobody needed to see the Timelord beating up himself, hilarious as it may appear. The oldest incarnation got there first and just in time to stop his two earlier regenerations from resolving their differences, pushing both away. They stopped and glared at him, nobody moving for a few moments. Nobody said anything- both Roses knew neither Doctor wouldn't listen anyway and Donna was too busy wishing she had popcorn right now.
Finally, young Rose decided to say something, carefully breaking the tension:
"Doctor, flattered as I am, now's not the time and place to fight over me…with yourself." She eyed each Doctor in turn, even the one who was breaking the fight up for now. They continued to throw the proverbial daggers from their eyes at each other. "Blimey" – she added thoughtfully after a few moments partly to their unwavering resolve to beat themselves up and partly because perhaps there was some truth behind her joke… She didn't want to go there. Thankfully, Donna didn't want to miss a chance to comment as well.
"No, no, I like it! It saves me the effort, of slapping you idiots one by one, do please continue!"- the Doctor glares simultaneously turned to her, but they didn't hold any determination or 'Oncoming storm' in them anymore, easily slipping into the 'exasperated with Donna again' glare. Funny how identical those glares were on the two faces. The 11th Doctor was just smiling at her proudly. If there had been any tension left it had swiftly escaped the scene tail between legs, ashamed of itself for showing up on the same planet with Donna Noble.
She pretended to ignore them and just turned to older Rose, asking:
"End of the universe or whatever is happening right now can wait for a few minutes, right? Right? Please? I really need to see this!"
The two Doctors didn't oblige. In fact they both appeared positively guilty to Donna, as if trying to smuggle on board 99 dalmatian puppies, which , quoting, 'were just about to be skinned by a very cruel woman, Donna!' without a certain companion's permission if her room can be used for the storage of said puppies, after only the 'But I don't want them to leave steps all over my favourite couch in the library' argument had been given.
"We cool, bros? Kiss and make up." – 11 tried, but was only awarded with exasperated looks on all sides (add horror on 10's behalf and older Rose silently shaking her head in concern and mouthing to him 'Don't ') He never asked whether it was because he had wanted himself to kiss himself or because of his cool and youthful vocabulary, which, undoubtedly, was beyond the understanding of anybody here. They were too last century.
The three Doctors were all about to step away from one another when they suddenly were send flying to the dusty ground, all three melodramatically waving legs having landed on their backs. Young Rose was taken aback for a second before she ran to help the 9th and 11th regeneration to get up while the 10th Doctor had already jumped up to his feet and was attempting to dedust himself. Older Rose found herself unable to do anything because of the crippling bout of giggles that had overcome her. Donna looked shocked more than anything, crossing her hands and exclaiming:
"Okay, kids, separate corners and no bananas after dinner! What the hell did we just say about fighting?"
"Donnaa, that wasn't us!" 10 was the first to respond, confused.
"What happened then?"- young Rose enquired, while helping her Doctor brush dust off the back of his favourite jacket. Next to her the oldest Doctor was looking at his new hat with a sorrowful expression. He knew trouble was always attracted to two things the most in this universe- Rose Tyler and his hats. He shouldn't have taken this baby out of his pocket at all.
"Yes, who was it then, bloody father Christmas?"- Donna needed some convincing.
"Nope, I didn't do anything this time." -9 said thoughtfully.
"What-"- Donna began but was interrupted by older Rose who was finally recovering from her laugh attack and decided to aid them in their investigation.
"From my point of view, it was as if some external force was transmitted to all three Doctors at the same time, pushing them back."
"Not a lethal external force, hopefully, otherwise that would be one hell of a headache in communication - if we all regenerated switching around."- the 10th Doctor added happily and then furrowed his eyebrows- "Mind you, wouldn't mind a sneak peek if I was ginger..."
Young Rose just looked at him incredulously, while his 9th regeneration pointed with both hands, trying to convey 'I was right about this joke of a regeneration in my arguments a few minutes ago and you know it' solely through body language. Older Rose caught his eye and shook her head in warning, so he let his hands audibly flop back down. Meanwhile the 11th Doctor had started repairing a little rip in his new hat using his sonic screwdriver and Donna was still recovering from shock.
"NOOO. He's not. Is he? Rose, tell me he's not Santa. He can't be Santa! Can he?! He's not though!"
"So he says…"- older Rose provided. Her younger self just smirked- Donna had accepted the existence of multiple regenerations of the Doctor from different points of time at the same place on the go and was getting excited over the fact that she might have been travelling with Santa. She was right to have liked her since the beginning.
"I am though!"- 10th sounded nothing less than perfectly offended.
"You SO are not!"- Donna exclaimed and turned to his 9th self, asking "Are you really?
9 just rolled his eyes and was about to launch into an explanation about how only stupid apes would be asking about a minor comment he had made while there was a mystery and potential danger at hand when the 11th Doctor finally finished scrutinising and refurbishing his hat, pocketed it in a movement that should have been forbidden by conventional laws of physics and slapped his hands together.
"Right! Let's see who's so chatty at this time of day!" – he said, taking his psychic paper out and opening it to show everybody. 'Voila. There's our external force."