She hadn't meant for it to happen, but Tris and Eric were at odds again.
He didn't say much of anything, which wasn't much of a change, but she knew.
Tris kept trying to think of an apology, but everything she came up with seemed to fall short.
Inexplicably, her body seemed to have a mind of its own. While Tris was almost positive she didn't want a sexual relationship, it didn't stop her body from betraying her with its desire, giving her feelings she couldn't comprehend and was ill equppied to deal with after all her years with the Abnegation.
It made physical training unbearable, for when they touched, he scorched her skin and Tris found her face turning deep shades of red.
Even Eric seemed affected, and that's what suprised her the most. He kept his hands off her except when they were sparring, and even then he held himself back.
Tris was doing as well as she ever had on the mats, thanks to Eric's distraction. He was still able to throw her around easily, but he refused to grapple with her and it gave Tris plenty of time to recover. Plenty of time to realize she had made a mistake.
She had begun something when she kissed him, put something in motion that she was powerless to stop. It was going to change their relationship irrevocably. For better or worse, Tris wasn't sure yet.
"It's lunch time," Eric barked, dropping his fists. It was actually ten minutes until lunch time, but he was looking strained so she didn't question him. "Get a full plate. I'll meet you in the cafeteria."
She gritted her teeth and watched Eric walk away, towards the locker rooms.
She had no choice but to head for the cafeteria alone.
The path to her destination was twisted around the chasm, a place she avoided unless absolutely necessary since her confrontation with Peter. She had gotten lost as an initiate more than once for her reluctance to get too close. She had since memorized the paths to avoid being too near the drop off and they served her well today as she made it to the cafeteria just before twelve.
By now, gossip regarding her initiation had mostly died down and Tris was not prepared for the loud hush that fell over the room as she entered.
She spotted Christina and Will, neither of whom had made eye contact in weeks, but now they were openly staring at her, as were a fair amount of the population of Dauntless.
Tris took a deep breath and headed for the line, trying not to notice how so many eyes followed her. As she stood in line for a lunch plate, one server she didn't recognize shook her head at Tris as she handed her a tray.
This was something new, she thought with a frown. This was not just about initiation rumors, it was something else.
She sat at a table by herself, as usual. She was about to assemble her hambuger with shaking hands when someone pulled out a chair next to her and sat down.
It was Four, eying her almost aggressively.
She stared at him mutely, taken by surprise.
"You need to be careful," he said without preamble.
"Why?" It didn't escape her notice that the attention of the room was on the two of them. "What's happened?"
"There are eyes everywhere Tris. And Dauntless aren't good at keeping secrets."
Her face fell, and a horrible idea came to mind.
"I don't know what you're talking about," she insisted, casually trying to pry more information from the young man.
"I think you do."
"What are they saying now?" Tris demanded, suddenly struck by her anger. Why was she doomed to be the target of Dauntless rumors? "It's not like it actually matters."
"It might. Leaders are held to a higher standard than you or me."
His words confirmed her fears, but she still was taken aback.
"What do you mean?"
He gave her a severe look.
"You're a smart girl. Just remember the cameras next time you're alone with him."
The cameras, of course. Perhaps they were even on the roof, as it was an entrance to the compound. She didn't doubt that it was someone in the control room with the loose lips.
Not Four, certainly. But someone had seen her stolen moments with Eric.
Only the strongest display of self control allowed Tris to hold back her groan. She wanted to bury her head in her hands, but she knew there were too many pairs of eyes watching.
She had a horrible feeling that she knew exactly what kind of rumors to expect. And if she knew the Dauntless, they wouldn't waste time.
"Thank you for telling me," Tris muttered, spearing a pickle with her fork with a little more force than necessary.
There was silence between the two for a few moments, where Four looked at her seriously, taking in her expression. She felt open and vulnerable under his stare and she didn't like it all. She had always wanted to get Four's attention, but not like this.
"I'm sorry this happened to you," he offered, sounding sincere. He covered her hand with his own and squeezed lightly. "You belong here. No matter what they say."
"Sorry, am I interrupting?"
If Tris had wanted to hide before, it was nothing compared to how she felt now, inbetween the two Dauntless men she was rumored to have been involved with.
Four removed his hand from hers quickly and they both looked at Eric.
He seemed calm enough, but Tris recognized the blaze behind his eyes and his stiff posture, indicating that he was angry. Livid, if the creases between his eyebrows were any indication.
"Eric," Four nodded to him. He left just as he had arrived, silently and suddenly.
Tris was nervous to see him leave, for she wasn't sure she wanted to be alone with Eric at the moment.
He was already angry with her. Remembering how he vented his anger on the mats, she shuddered to think what new problems her little conversation with Four would cause.
"Something's... happenned. He was just warning me," Tris explained, slightly panicky at the dark expression on Eric's face as he sat in Four's now empty chair.
"Oh? Whatever about?"
Judging by Eric's raised brow and sarcastic tone, he was already aware of the situation.
Without thinking, Tris punched him on the arm.
"Unbelievable. You could have told me," she whispered, suddenly aware of their audience.
"It won't affect you. The leaders know how hard you've worked to be where you are now."
"Do you know what people are saying about me?" She didn't, but she could guess, and she was positive it was nothing good.
"Were you this angry when Four was the one you seduced?" His tone was biting, eyes cold.
"Of course I was," she hissed, fighting the urge to hit him again. "Because none of it is true. You know that, Eric."
"It doesn't matter what I think. And it shouldn't matter what they think." He gestured around the room, where very few people had the decency to look away.
She drew in a deep breath to calm her racing heart, hoping that Eric didn't notice how rattled she was. She hid her shaking hands on her lap, wiping sweaty palms on her pants. With a slow exhale, she hid her fear from her audience and tried to pretend that nothing was amiss.