He's my son

Chapter 14

Two days later Sam was released from ICU, his fever was now completely gone, it had disappeared slowly as Mary had sat by his side each night for a few hours. Of course Sam had been unconscious at the time and had no idea his dead mother was sitting with him. Now he was well enough to begin chemo once again, Sam was dreading it but he would continue to muddle through it anyway he could. He wouldn't let his family suffer if he didn't go through with it. He hated cancer with a passion, he wished there had never been such thing, no one should have to go through it.

He had been waiting a few minutes for a nurse to come transfer him back into his old room, when the door opened and a sleepy, barely looking alive, Dean stumbled through the door. Sam raised his brow at his brother's shaggy appearance. He hadn't seen Dean looking this rough in quite some time.

"You look like hell" Sam commented though he was happy to have his older brother's company.

"That little brother is the benefit of sleeping in the ICU waiting room all night, you would look as good as I do if you had tried it." Dean said going over to stand by the wall closest to Sam's bed.

"You can't keep spending the night here" Sam said hating the shadows under his beloved brother's eyes.

"I'd like to see you stop me" Dean said "I'm not staying away from my pain in the ass little brother while he's in the hospital."

"I appreciate it" Sam said softly "But I don't want you to wear yourself out on my account, I'm not worth it being exhausted over." Dean hated the helpless look in his brother's eyes just much as he hated the fact that Sam felt he wasn't good enough for the family. His confidence is something we're going to have to work on Dean thought.

"That's where you are wrong brother dearest. You are worth it otherwise I would have told Dad to put you back under the cabbage leaf you came from." Dean said chuckling at the expression of Sam's face, he reached out and gently squeezed Sam's hand to let him know he was serious about Sam being worth it.

"I didn't come from cabbage" Sam muttered swiping at Dean who only smiled and moved out of his reach.

"As far as I'm concerned you did" Dean said chuckling as Sam tried to hit him again. "It explains why you're such a sissy" Sam glared at Dean and sat up preparing himself to get out of bed and go after his brother.

"Nice to see him in fighting shape" a gruff voice said from the doorway causing the boys to stop their scuffling and turn towards the door.

"Hey Dad" Sam said quietly and settled back into the bed, John was hear now, he had missed him just as much as he'd missed Dean he just wasn't sure how to express it. John entered the room and went and stood by Dean.

"I'm glad you're doing better kiddo for a short while it got rough" John said reaching and rubbing Sam's hair. John pretended not to notice the small strands that fell off in his hand. He hadn't wanted this to happen to Sam he knew Sam had always loved having his long hair, it was his own way of rebelling against him.

Sam shook his father's hand off his head and with came more strands of hair. Sam seen the hair fall and froze, one of his worst nightmares about this whole thing was coming true, he was going to lose his hair.

Dean seeing the broken expression on Sam's face felt a tug in his heart and quickly reached out and tugged his brother into a hug. He hated chick flick moments with a passion but the way Sam was looking, well, Dean couldn't take it, he needed to be able to help Sam in some small way.

"It's just hair it will grow back" Dean said softly holding tightly onto Sam.

"It's not your hair so it's easy for you to say that" Sam said as the tears started falling. He was starting to realize the enormity of just what he had to face. And it terrified him, after all not everybody beat cancer, a lot of kids died each year from it.

"I don't want to do this" Sam whimpered against Dean. "I can't I'm scared."

"You can do anything you put your mind to" John said softly placing his hand on Sam's back and rubbing gently. He hated seeing Sam like this; it was breaking his heart to see Sam so scared and helpless in Dean's arms. That in turn made John feel helpless since he knew that there nothing physical he could do to help him expect be there.

"Dad's right, Sam" Dean said quietly "This isn't too big or too hard for you to handle; besides you have me and Dad with Bobby and Pastor Jim and Caleb here. We won't let you be alone, even if I have to break some more rules to stay with you all night every night. I won't let you be alone and scared."

"What if I die?" Sam asked quietly "what's going to happen to you guys?'

"You're not going to die" Dean said determinedly as if he could chase this supernatural monster away from Sam and kill it with his own two hands. "I won't let you."

"Dean's right" John said softly hating the tears alone with fear in his baby's eyes. "We won't let you die, you mean the world to the both of us, we won't let go, so don't you let go."

Dean couldn't have appreciated his father more than he did in that moment. Sam had needed assurance from the both of them and John had more than exceeded Dean's expectations.

"You hear that" Dean said softly gently shaking Sam "Don't you dare give up, we will be right here rooting for you, so don't quite cause we will carry you through this nightmare."

Sam felt the power of Dean's words straight through to his heart, he could trust anything Dean and his father said. All he had to do was fight and they would be waiting for him at the finish line when this fight was over. He was glad to have the family he did in that moment, he was still scared of the fight ahead but he knew as long as he had John and Dean by his side he could see it through to the end and come out on the winning side.

Sam sighed and pulled away from Dean and sat back on his bed, he didn't doubt Dean meant what he said when he'd break all the rules to be with him. Sam would have done the same thing if it had been Dean in the same position he was in.

"Feeling better now bitch" Dean said laughing when his little brother glared up at him.

"Shut up jerk" Sam muttered. Though he didn't say it he did feel better about the situation.

Thanks for reading hope you enjoyed this chapter. I was depressed when I wrote it so I'm sure it showed in the chapter itself, but I hope you enjoy it anyways. I love Dean in this chapter, can't get enough of big brother Dean. Anyways enough with that have a good night and thanks again for reading and reviewing. Liz